A/N: For anyone who follows me on tumblr, you probably saw this coming. I ship these two as a brotp, so this is a non-yaoi fic. The feels are strong. Send help. For anyone following Winter Amaranthine, the next chapter is in the works, and will hopefully be published soon. Thanks for your patience! R&R!
Desperado: In chess, a piece that seems determined to give itself up,
typically either to bring about stalemate or perpetual check.
...
In the thousands of years of his life, there had only ever been one time when Sebastian Michaelis disliked a cat.
A few short months had passed since the sealing of his latest contract. His precious find- a boy of no more than ten years old- had a soul the likes of which he had never encountered. The purity of the boy's being called to him across the dimensions, a beacon slicing through the black, drawing him to his new master like a moth to a flame.
As he eagerly reached through the bars of that cage to grasp the boy's hand, he learned two surprising things. There was, of course, the matter of the crystalline soul's existence, so blindingly bright that the demon twitched with hunger in its presence. But that day he also learned an illuminating fact about humans: that the size of a one's body does not limit the enormity of his rage.
His prey was cruel, without scruples, brimming with lust for revenge, cold-blooded, callous, sadistic. His willpower was absolute. His drive to accomplish his goal was like nothing the demon had ever seen in a mortal before. The child claimed to serve the Queen, but he was the true tyrant of the underworld. It was a wonder the creature had even needed a demon to get him out of that prison. Sebastian almost pitied those that crossed the little Earl. Almost.
Had he been concerned about anything but consuming that soul, he would have been incredibly bothered about how exactly the soul was pure in the midst of that hatred.
Regardless, he treated his master as any true butler would- with the utmost respect, perfect obedience, and a professional detachment that would have put a human butler to shame. His own drive to consume that perfect soul only intensified every time the boy treated him like a dog- which, to his mild chagrin, was often- encompassing his whole person until he had forgotten what life was like before he bargained with the child.
But one night, that night when he hated a feline for the first time, something shifted.
The young master had been especially sleepless as of late. Every night, at the stroke of twelve, the boy would abandon his fruitless efforts to sleep and rise to wander through the mansion. Without the Earl's knowledge, of course, the butler tailed him silently through the halls, ensuring that he stayed out of trouble. It was in these shadowed moments that the demon need not conceal the full extent of his hunger. He could gaze openly at the boy without fear of reprimand, longing for the day when he would fulfill the contract.
One night, the master turned a corner, deviating from his usual route, and ambled outside onto the back terrace. The demon remained in the house, his red eyes glowing watchfully from the shadow of the door.
For a long time, the boy merely stood there, the wind agitating his open robe ever so slightly. His face was turned toward the conglomeration of dark trees on the horizon. His fists were clenched. Most likely, he was cogitating on the horrors of his past again.
Without warning, a delicate white feline strolled out from behind a rosebush. A stray, no doubt. Predictably, Sebastian had to restrain himself from running over to the adorable thing and cuddling it. As he was, he contented himself with the knowledge that he would find it once his master had left.
The cat mewed softly, padding its way up to the boy. Ciel jerked and looked down, instinctively taking a step away. Sebastian prickled. He knew his master hated cats, but he would interfere if the boy tried to hurt it.
All at once, the tautness of the Earl's frame departed. Shoulders drooping, he bent down slowly and sat on the granite stoop, allowing the cat to rub itself on his arm.
Sebastian's jaw uncharacteristically fell open. He closed it as his master spoke.
"You know," he began in a voice only a demon could hear from far away, "I may be allergic to you, but I wouldn't mind some company right now."
He scratched the cat gently on the ears. Sebastian tried not to fall over. It was very rare that anything shocked a demon, and this was currently taking the cake. What in the world would make his master act like this? Was he really this weak underneath that mask of arrogance?
All at once, the realization hit him like a bullet- the reason why the boy's drive for vengeance was so strong, the reason why he remained so distant, and the reason why his soul was so pure.
It all made sense. Atrocities did one of two things to mortals: made them cruel, or made them kind. To Earl Ciel Phantomhive, it seemed that they had done both.
This small boy, who had lived a life full with more horrors than most people could comprehend, had a capability to love deeply beyond what anyone would have suspected. He loved selectively, of course. To most of the world, the boy showed the most cruelty his fractured heart could manage.
But it was love for his parents that drove him to revenge, no matter what he claimed. It was the depth of his love that prevented him from doling it out to just anyone. It was the purity of his love that kept his soul whiter than snow.
Ciel sneezed, making Sebastian jump. With a sniffle, he said to the cat, "Well, that's enough for tonight. You'd better get out of here before Sebastian sees you."
The cat looked up at him, tail twitching. Ciel sniffed once more and turned to go back inside. Rooted to the spot, Sebastian merely melded his form with the shadows of the house as his master passed. When the creaking of the grand staircase told the demon the coast was clear, he emerged.
It was his turn to gaze at the horizon, his form bathed in moonlight. How had he not seen this before?
A curious feeling was worming itself into his chest. He felt a swell of protectiveness-one beyond what was normal for a hunter about his prey. It worried him. Understanding the boy had changed something. The hunger was still there, but when the demon pictured his master now, he no longer saw a mere meal. His resolve weakened as he stood on the terrace.
Sebastian clenched his fists.
He didn't want this! He didn't want it! Demons that felt affection for mortals were no better than reapers. That affection weakened them, turning them soft, making them pathetic pieces of sniveling trash. Besides that, no matter how he felt, he was bound by a contract. Once his master's vengeance had been accomplished, he would have to eat the boy's soul.
He wished desperately that the shroud of ignorance had not been torn away from him. Even as he wished, he heard the low tone of his master's voice echoing in his memory: "Something once lost will never return."
A pressure rubbed up against the demon's leg. He looked down and silently regarded the stray cat, the instigator of this realization. For the first time in his life, he refused to pet it. He coldly turned on his heel and returned to the darkness of the house, shutting the door noiselessly behind him.
Moments later, he materialized in his master's room. Petting the cat seemed to have done the Earl wonders- he lay fast asleep on top of the covers, his face half visible above the pillow in the streaming moonlight. He was snoring with his mouth open.
Sebastian approached the bed, an inscrutable frown set deep in his brow. He stopped. Only partially conscious of what he was doing, he reached toward the diminutive boy's head. His outstretched hand hovered just above it for a few seconds, wavered, and fell.
In the quietest of whispers, he said, "I will be here until the end, Ciel."
Backing away, he left the room without a sound.
At the muffled shut of the door, Ciel ceased his snoring, sat up, and looked wordlessly after him.