WHEN HELL COMES KNOCKIN'
The night sky was dark, so dark that it had Sam and Dean on edge. The weather was balmy, so warm that they thought they skipped a few months instead of being in March. It was too warm and the windows to the Impala were rolled down to let in some air as they sped down the shadowed back road. They'd been driving for hours, never stopping as if they were destined to be somewhere at a certain time. There was urgency in the hazel eyes of Dean and it scared the living shit out of Sam.
"Slow down Dean. This road is too windy for you to be going this fast." Sam said as he held onto the door for reassurance. Dean's driving was too dangerous, "We'll make it to Elizabethtown if you slow down."
Dean gritted his teeth, he knew that getting to Elizabethtown was life and death and if he slowed now, he'd be too late. Earlier he'd received a call from a close friend. Jacob had been there for him when Sam went off to college. It was why he was in such a rush to get to his destination.
"Dean, who called earlier and put the flame under your ass? Huh?" Sam asked.
Dean shook his head, how could he tell his brother that a dear friend that he didn't know was in trouble. How could he explain the feeling of guilt when he thought about what he told Jacob a few years back. Dean had told Jacob he wished he was his brother instead of Sam. Sam had left him to hunt with their father and parts of him had been jealous. Oh how he regretted those words now. How stupid he'd been.
Dean sighed; "My friend Jacob called. I met him while you were at Stanford. We hit it off Sam and he's the closest I have to a friend these days that's still alive."
Sam just looked at his brother, his knuckles white as he gripped the door. "And?"
"Alastair has his little sister. Her name's Alexa and is the only thing Jacob has left."
The news wasn't good; Dean knew that if Sam didn't know the whole truth, he'd just think Dean was paranoid. "Alexa is a special kid too Sam. She's strong-willed as well. When I saw her powers I kept my distance until you started showing them as well. It freaked me out."
Sam muttered, "So you're telling me that she's in danger and we have to save her, for what?"
Dean banged his hands on the steering wheel and pressed her foot harder on the pedal. Sam didn't understand that Alastair wanted to breed with her to create little demons to kill the world. How he wanted to explain this all to Sam but couldn't, not after he'd been through while in Hell.
"I just have to get there Sam. Alexa's in danger and if we don't stop Alastair," he paused, "Let's just say that all we've been fighting for is going to be in vain."
Sam shook his head, "And the point is?" He was clueless and it was Dean's fault. "When was the last time you talked to Jacob, better yet, why help Alexa at all. Like you said, she freaked you out. So why help her now Dean?"
Dean mumbled, "Because I told Jacob that no matter what I felt, I would be there to help. And by god, I meant it Sam. I learned to accept your abilities and I don't think any less of you. God, you have to remember that you weren't even around when this all went down. I've changed."
"Then you don't feel guilty about anything?"
That question stopped Dean in his tracks. Did he not feel guilt every time he was with Sam? For leaving him when he went to Hell. When did he never feel guilty?
"Dean, what is it? What are you not telling me?"
Dean slowed the Impala and cruised along the road. Sam felt the change in the atmosphere, as if Dean was letting him know how he felt.
"Dean?"
"When you went off to Stanford, I was so angry that you got to go. It was like dad let you have a life and I was stuck here doing this. When I met Jacob, he felt more like a brother then you did. You left me and I was so angry. I regret those days Sam, god, I really do. But it seems that they haunt me too."
Sam was silent. How could Dean say such things about him behind his back? And why now tell him.