Disclaimer: I don't own HP. I wish I did but..


It's raining. He always liked the rain, it was supposed to be cleansing. I used to like the rain too, but I don't like it anymore. I hate green nowadays too, which is kind of strange, because I used to love green. But, it shouldn't be TOO surprising that I don't like it. I hardly enjoy anything anymore.

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It all started the summer after our fifth year. My father was sent to Azkaban and I was left alone with my mother. It wasn't long after that that I was sought out by Death Eaters. I somehow managed to escape them unharmed, unlike my mother who was captured and killed because of my father's failure and my defection. But I guess that didn't matter too much to me, for she and I were never close.

I was able to avoid the Death Eaters long enough for me to get to Hogwarts, long enough for me to be able to officially switch sides. I went to see Dumbledore right after the Sorting and other festivities. He welcomed me with 'the twinkle' and moved me out of the dungeons to a room near Gryffindor tower 'for my own safety'. I personally think that he wanted me somewhere easy to control, but I didn't mind. After all, it would only have taken one night in the dungeons before I would have been dead. Slytherins aren't called 'Death Eater spawn' for nothing.

I pretty much spent the first month on my own. I had no one to talk to: Slytherins would have killed me at the first opportunity and the other Houses didn't really like me (meaning they hated or were scared of me). It all changed when we started to become friends (or more…) after our detention with Filch for fighting in the corridors. But honestly, clean the trophy room? Lacks originality if you ask me... Anyway, we were working quietly and ignoring each other (FOR ONCE!) when He suddenly looks at me and says: ''Look, Malfoy. I'm tired of fighting with you. Can't we just call a truce?'' and sticks His hand out to me. I look at Him dumbly for a moment before I walk over to Him and take His hand. ''Truce.''

Our friendship (if you could call it even that) started growing after our truce. We started studying and flying together. We still threw snide remarks at each other, but they lacked the fire of you previous insults. It was really just friendly bantering. Weasley wasn't happy of our new-found friendship, but Granger didn't object too much: she was just glad that we didn't get each other in trouble anymore.

While our friendship grew, I started noticing things about Him; how He actually had some attractive qualities. I wasn't too startled about fancying Him on some level: I'd known my preference for a long while now. But I didn't want to act upon it, because I had no proof that He was interested in me; hell, I didn't even have proof that He liked men.

The next month went by and day after day I fancied Him more. He was becoming quite an obsession for me. One night, when we were alone in my room studying, He confronted me.

''Draco?''

I looked up from my books: ''Yes?''.

''What…what do you think of me?''

I blinked at Him, confused: ''What do you mean?''

''I just... Oh, sod it!'' He leans over the table and kisses me. And I was in heaven.

Our relationship got deeper after that. We were seen together at almost every time: we became practically inseparable. But I don't want to go deeper into our relationship: it hurts enough as it is. Suffice to say, that my sixth year at Hogwarts was the happiest time of my life ̶ until the Final battle.

The Final battle took place at the end of our sixth year. I don't remember a lot about it, just the flashing of spells flying through the air and people screaming and falling to the ground. It was a real mess. We were fighting our way to Voldemort (yes, I use his name now) side by side and had no time to pay attention to others. When we finally reached Voldemort, he created a barrier blocking everyone else from their duel. I tried to get to Him but I was no match for Voldemort's magical power. I could only watch as they dueled. I felt utterly helpless. Suddenly there was a flash of light and He was lying on the ground, motionless. I ran to Him, completely ignoring everything else around me. I knelt beside Him and brushed His hair back gently: His scar was gone. I started laughing hysterically. Everyone else must have thought that I was crazy. But I wasn't. I just thought that it was ridiculous that He left me here, alone. He was supposed to survive. He always did ̶ except now. He was gone forever. That's when I realized that I loved Him. I loved Him and never got to say it to Him. I broke down crying and refused to be moved until I passed out.

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I never got over the fact that He was gone. I guess it didn't help that I was alone. Even my godfather had died. Lucky bastards, leaving me here. That's why I'm now here, in the trophy room. It's still raining: I can hear it in the silence of the night. I'm a seventh year student now. But I don't even care anymore. I just want Him back. I can't live without Him; without Him my life has no meaning. He was my life. Now I want my life back. I turn my wand on myself and whisper 'Sectumsempra'. If you wonder why I didn't just Avada Kedavra myself, I thought it would be too easy. It feels more real this way.When I draw my last breaths, I silently thank my godfather for teaching me the spell and whisper: ''I'm coming home my love. My Harry.''

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As it's my first fic ever I'd really like to get your opinion about it... So REVIEW. Pretty please? :)