I had promised her that it would be like I had never met her. I had promised her that she would never see me again. I had promised her that I would never interfere in her life again…
I was about to break all of these promises.
It had been six months since I had last seen her devastatingly beautiful face with that look of defeat on it. Six months since I had felt the burn like a cattle rod as her scent touched my throat; since I had felt her warm, soft skin against my cold granite body; since I had felt her blood red lips shape themselves around mine.
My entire being ached to see her… to touch her… to feel her.
But I wouldn't. I would just see if she was happy.
I didn't tell my family where I was going – I hadn't for six months, really. I just packed up my things in my tiny apartment and got on a plane, heading back to the U.S.A.
I parked my rental car in front of the school like I used to do when I attended here six months ago and got out silently.
I would not talk to her, I would just watch.
I walked silently through the halls, everybody else was in class, to the room I knew she would be in.
Mike seems to be in a…
...Times pi is...
I really hope he...
The "voices" of the minds inside the classroom clambered about in my head.
I sorted through them one at a time, looking for one that would be thinking of her since I could not hear her.
I smiled when I found a voice I had often relied on in the past to help me spy on my love.
Bella's been in such a bad mood lately. She seems to be scared of something. I wonder what it is... Maybe I should ask - No, no, I don't want to pry. If she wants to tell me, she'll tell me.
Angela Weber's thoughts of Bella concerned me. What was Bella scared of?
I would watch and hopefully be able to find out. I would not let my Bella be afraid.
I watched, unseen, through a crack in the open door, searching with my eyes for the one I could not see with my mind.
Bella sat in the back of the class, in the exact same spot she had occupied when I had attended this school six months ago. She stared unseeingly at the teacher, obviously not paying attention.
Her upper teeth chewed her lower lip unceasingly as she glanced worriedly up at the clock with announced only ten minutes left to the school day.
Bella sighed and laid her head down on the desk, her finger tapping in time with the passing seconds.
The bell rang loudly and she jumped in her seat. My Bella was definitely afraid of something.
In a rush, Bella quickly picked up her bag and raced out the door, not even noticing me a few feet away from her.
I followed at a distance as Bella hurried out of the building and toward her rusty Chevy truck.
She ducked inside, slamming the door behind her, and laid her head against the steering wheel.
"Hey, Bella!" Mike Newton – my old rival – called to her, waving.
Bella didn't hear him and continued to breathe deeply inside the confines of her truck.
"Bella!" Mike knocked on her window and she jumped screaming.
"Oh, sorry," Mike said, terrified that he had scared her.
Geez, what is up with her? She's so jumpy lately. I only knocked.
I suppressed a growl at the tone of his thoughts.
"No, no, it's alright," Bella replied, forcing her creaky window down. "Did you need something, Mike?"
"Not really, I was just wondering if – maybe – you would want to go see a movie this weekend. You know, like a date."
Don't you dare try to turn this into a group thing again, Bella Swan. I don't want to get stuck as the third wheel for you and that Jacob Black kid again.
Jacob Black?
I frowned. Why in the world would Bella be hanging out with that boy?
I felt a surge of jealousy but I quickly suppressed it. I had no right to her now. Especially now if she was dating Jacob Black.
"Mike," Bella sighed, "honestly, I would love to."
Yes! She would love to!
Mike had obviously missed the sarcasm in Bella's voice. I smiled, pleased.
"But I can't really go into the city right now, and I've got… plans this weekend." Bella's face colored with her lie.
"Oh, yeah, that's okay." Mike muttered, already backing down.
Bet she's hanging out at La Push again. What the heck does she do down there all the time?
"Sorry," Bella apologized, turning her key in the ignition.
She pulled away from the downcast boy and I quickly hurried to my rental car while I still had a visual on her.
I followed Bella back to her house, careful to keep out of her sight. She immediately ran inside and I went around the back of the house to hide outside the open kitchen window.
She entered the kitchen and dumped her heavy bag into one of the mismatched chairs. Bella picked up the phone and dialed a number before pressing it to her ear.
"Hey, Bella," a husky voice answered on the first ring. "What's up?"
Jacob Black.
I bit back a snarl of jealousy.
You have no right, I reminded myself.
"Hey, Jake," Bella replied and she sounded nervous. "Anything new?"
"Not since you called this morning," Jacob teased lightly before his tone grew more somber. "But seriously, nothing's happened. It's been two weeks since we've had any sign of that stupid bloodsucker. She's probably long gone."
"Are you sure?" Bella asked, starting to sound a little relieved.
Bloodsucker? What vampire was here in Forks? And why would Jacob Black know about vampires?
I might just have to break my promise of just watching Bella and talk to her.
No, you idiot, I cursed myself. You cannot ruin her life anymore than you already have.
"Yeah, I'm sure." Jacob told Bella. "That red-headed bloodsucker's probably never coming back."
"Jake," Bella said her voice straining. "Vampires never give up when on the hunt. She still thinks I am… Edward's…mate." My silent heart soared and her voice cracked when she said my name. "Victoria is never going to stop hunting me until I'm dead – or she is."
Victoria! I could barely hold back the snarl this time.
What was she doing here?
"She's probably figured out that she can't harm Edward by killing you now." Jacob muttered.
Harm me by killing Bella?
"Or maybe, she realized that Edward isn't around to care anymore."
I couldn't help but notice the anger that colored Jacob Black's voice when he mentioned my name; nor could I not notice the arm that rose up to cover Bella's chest, as if she were holding herself together.
"Maybe," Bella muttered, wincing.
There was a long silence before Jacob spoke again.
"Hey, you coming down to the rez today? I don't have to run with the pack for another hour."
Bella sighed again, "No, I think I'm starting to get on Billy's nerves, being there all the time."
"Are you kidding?" Jacob scoffed. "My dad loves you, and with you being you here so often, Charlie has more excuses to come over."
"Sure, sure," Bella replied, patronizing.
"Hey, that's my line." Jacob laughed.
"Yeah… Anyway, I have a lot of homework to do, Jake, so I'll just talk to you later."
"Yeah, sure," Jacob sounded reluctant to say good bye. "Bye, Bells."
"Bye, Jacob," Bella hung up the phone and picked her backpack back up.
I continued to watch Bella through the window as she went about the rest of her day: doing her homework and preparing her father's dinner.
She jumped at the slightest noise and my whole being screamed for me to go talk to her, to apologize, but I just continued to watch.
Charlie and Bella ate their dinner in silence, as usual, and Bella excused herself to go to bed early.
I beat her up stairs and hid under her bed where she would not notice me.
After a quick shower, Bella curled up on her bed and for a minute I thought she had fallen asleep until I heard a hoarse sob.
"Edward," she moaned and she seemed to be fighting to breath.
I couldn't help it.
I flashed up onto the bed next to her and lay down next to her, lightly touching the tears on her rosy cheeks.
"Bella," I murmured quietly, my voice rough with the pain I felt at seeing her in pain.
Her eyes flying open, Bella gasped in shock as she stared up in horror at me.
The horror in her eyes slowly faded to be replaced by chagrin.
"Crap!" she whispered. "It's finally happened, hasn't it?"
"What?" I frowned down at her fresh tears.
"I suppose I brought it upon myself, forcing it to go further with the motorcycle and the cliff." Bella ignored me, wiping her tears away. "Oh, crap," she moaned. "It's going to kill Charlie to have to take me in. Maybe I can just pretend everything's normal for a while… No," she laughed bitterly, "I shouldn't, not if I'm seeing things now."
"Bella…What are you talking about?" She wasn't making any sense.
"Wait, maybe I'm just asleep. That'd be good." She continued. "Yeah that's it, I just fell asleep. Wow, this is a lot different than my usual dreams." Bella frowned up at me, "We're usually in the woods and I can't keep up with you and get lost. So why are we in my bedroom?"
"Bella, you're not asleep," I purred, smiling that I now knew a little bit of what she was talking about.
"Then why are you here?" she challenged, frowning deeper.
I grimaced slightly; I could see the pain and hurt in her eyes.
"Bella," I touched her face softly, "I never left, not really."
Fresh tears welled in her eyes and spilled over. "Now I know I'm dreaming!"
"Bella," I moaned. "You're not dreaming!"
Bella shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. "No, no, I have to wake up. If I don't wake up soon, it's going to hurt even worse than the other times."
The pain I had felt since the day I had left her could not compare to this. She had been suffering just as much as I had – maybe even worse since she truly believed I had stopped loving her – and now, she did not believe I had really returned to her.
"Bella…"
"I have to wake up!" Bella screeched, clamping her hands over her ears.
Resisting the urge to stay, I gently kissed the hands covering her eyes, took a deep breath of her burning scent, and flashed out of her room.
In my rental car, I fell apart. My iron hands clutched at the granite skin on my face as the dry sobs shook my entire body.
How could I have allowed this to happen? Victoria was hunting my Bella, she was in pain from my leaving, and she believed I was just a dream.
It was almost midnight before I gained enough control to form a plan.
I pulled out my phone as it vibrated passionately.
"Of course I'll come!" Alice was speaking the moment our phones connected.
"See you tomorrow," I said and hung up.
Their expressions were priceless; their thoughts even more so, and I was having a hard time not laughing or tearing their heads off.
Cullen! What's he doing here?! Mike Newton thought as I entered my first class – after several phone calls, I had been able to resume the same schedule from the previous semester. Does Bella know he's here? I hope she hits the stupid jerk. Does he ever realize what he did to her?
I winced as Mike pulled up a mental image of Bella, six months ago.
She had been worse off than I thoug- hoped.
I sighed.
I knew Bella better than that. She would not have let go of me easily. Sure, she could believe I didn't love her, but she could not let go. She had probably tormented herself over it for a long time… And based off last night, she still was.
I frowned as I watched Mike's mind eye, remembering a trip to the movies last month with Jacob and Bella. She looked a lot better, more happy and carefree than I had ever seen her and a lot better than she had six months ago.
I hope that Black kid busts Cullen't lip for her, Mike was thinking venomously. As much as I hate them both, I don't want Bella back with that idiot. At least Black seems to make her happy.
Oh. So Jacob Black was the reason Bella had changed so much.
I froze into a statue. Was Bella dating Black? I wanted to tear him apart.
You have no right! And if Bella is dating him, you should want her to be happy! I reminded myself.
The teacher came in and I quickly unfroze.
"Ah, Edward Cullen," he said, his eyes cold on mine – most teachers didn't like me here. "It's nice to have you back again."
I fought a smile at his thoughts: Great the Cullens are back. Arrogant little -
The door to the classroom opened again and a freshman girl came in – running errands for the office.
She handed a note to the teacher and I listened in as he read it.
Please excuse Isabella Swan from all classes. She will not be in attendance for a few days. -Chief Charlie Swan
I froze again. Bella hadn't been sick or anything last night. Did she realize I hadn't been a dream and was now avoiding me? Would Charlie allow her to ditch school like that? Or was she really just sick? And how bad was it if she wouldn't be attending for a few days?!
The teacher's eyes flickered back to me, his thoughts along the same line as mine.
I was definitely going to find out the answer.
I found Alice waiting at the Volvo as soon as school let out. She slipped into the front seat as soon as she saw me and I climbed into the driver's seat.
"Boring?" she asked cynically.
"Always," I muttered. "Alice…?"
She sighed. No, I don't know what's wrong with Bella. I can't see her for some reason!
"I'm going to her house though," Alice finished aloud. "I want to know what the heck is going on. Why can't I see her? I've never had this problem before!"
I smiled sardonically, "Now you know how I feel."
"This is different!"
"How's that?"
I used to be able to see her. You've never been able to hear her.
I pulled off the main road and onto our three-mile long drive, grinding my teeth and speeding at a pace that would have turned Bella paler than usual.
Oh, and by the way, Alice thought. Everyone's home now.
I slammed on the brakes and whirled to face her. "WHAT?! WHY'D YOU DO THAT?"
DON'T SHOUT AT ME! Alice frowned.
"I didn't do anything," she continued. "I told them I was coming here and Jasper followed. Esme and Carlisle both missed it here and Emmet wanted to come along too."
Growling unceasingly, I slammed my foot on the gas and we shot forwards along the path.
Don't kill the car, Alice muttered in her thoughts.
I parked in the garage and we both raced into the house. I followed Alice into the dining room where everyone was waiting.
Carlisle's face immediately had me worried but he was trying his absolute hardest to block out whatever was bothering him.
"Carlisle?" I asked, concerned.
His concentration slipped and an image of Bella emerged from his memory.
"No!" I growled. "What's wrong with her?"
Carlisle's memory of Bella showed lying on starch white sheets in the hospital, her face paler than mine. Tubes were hooked up to both of her arms and the entire left side of her torso was bulging with bandages which were stained in bright, crimson blood. HER blood.
"She's been badly injured," Carlisle explained. "Three deep slash wounds in the side, dangerously close to her internal organs. When asked about it, Bella's been telling everyone that she ran into a sharp edge at Jacob Black's garage, but… she's such a terrible liar. It looks like some kind of animal wound. I tried to talk to her alone, but the Quileute boy and his friends won't let me speak to her without them in the room."
He showed me his memory of Jacob Black and three of his friends, all of them more massive than average teenage boys.
"I'll talk to her," Alice offered.
"No," I interrupted. "Allow me."
Before anything else could be said, I dashed out of the house to my car, towards my beloved Bella.
A/N:
Don't kill me for posting this rather than working on my other stories (aka, Bella's Coven and the Goldeyes - which several people have requested I continue). But I was going through my computer files and found this. This was about as far as I got before my computer crashed. I don't know if I should continue it or not. So... ten reviews (from different people) I continue to write it?