Ugh…
At first the licking of lips and moving of tongue only supplies dust. There's no.. wet where wet should be.
Eyes clench. Wet there... too wet... sticky. There's gunk there…
Ugh…
Tired... really Tired... back to sleep…
Ugh…
Licking lips again. Not wet. Eyes... still wet…
Time... what time is it?
At first opening her eyes was difficult, to say the least. When they actually squeaked opens a smidgen she clamped them shut again.
Ugh... Lights too bright…
Wait. Something... Something I'm supposed to do...? Something…
Paper... School paper due... due.. Today?
Dam. What time...?
She emboldened her attempts and didn't shy away when the bight light made her eyes want to sink into her skull. Everything was blurry at first, and the stuff on her eyes didn't help. She blinked a bit, trying to clear the blistering light and see what was before her.
The light, not actually being that bright, was coming from a window, near the foot of her bed... At least what she could see from the corner of it. Mostly she just saw ceiling and the upper portion of light grey walls.
All unfamiliar.
She scanned the room ideally, letting her eyes adjust before turning her head a bit. Her neck creaked as she did so, and she found herself slightly concerned when Lynn's bed wasn't across from her. There was nothing on the walls. No pictures, no nothing. There was an old wardrobe…
No clock…
The light from the window wasn't bright... maybe there was still time.
Time? What did she need that for again?
Oh, paper... paper about...?
She grimaced, trying to remember. English? History? Pfft, what else... creative writing?
Ugh, head hurts. Too much thoughts…
Too- too many... Too many thinks? Ah forget it.
Too tired to think…
She drug her head back up to the ceiling before sighing and going back to sleep.
Paper... Lynn's... bed... no clock…
Mouth dry. Eyes gooey. Head... tilted?
Opening her eyes with less difficulty she realized she was sitting up. Looking around and lifting her head up slightly she could see she was in a new room…
A living room, with a couch and Tv. The room looked very new, the furniture, the coffee table... the Tv was something else. The screen was curved and seemed to be made of see through glass, the images almost projected on it. In fact the window behind it could almost be seen through the image.
Confusion... How was that possible? She looked to the only other thing she could see in the room. Hung on the wall near a door was…
Her parent's wedding photo?
It was a large print, with the two holding each other close, smiling at each other while her mother's stomach held the first pudge of pregnancy. That was Lori…
Where was everybody...? Should be more noisy... right?
Trying to turn her head was difficult. There was a table next to her that had a Tv remote and a picture of Lana and Lola, taken when they were five and starting school. Licking her lips she laxed her head slightly.
She was somewhere... but her family was here... maybe some of them? She attempted to sit up and look around a bit more…
And trying...trrryyying...TRYING…
No movement. Not even a twitch, she wasn't even feeling the strain of the attempts to move from the muscles.
Seems like that should be concerning, but her head also felt full of cotton balls... Maybe later?
"Meow."
Her brain spluttered in order to keep up with events. Looking down a bit she expect to see Cliff... but found a white cat instead. It padded into the room quietly, looking board at the TV before looking to her.
The two blinked at each other.
The cat, clearly surprised, padded to her and leaped into her lap, looking up at her face quizzically. She had to squint a bit. There was something on it's collar. Strange shapes…
Letters stupid, keep up.
Right. Uhhg... She attempted to make sense of them as the cat sniffed her.
Thats was a... C... R? Yes... yes thats an R...Cr... Crag? I think…
"Crahhah."
Whoa. Even the cat looked shocked. Her voice was raspy and rough, not to mention it didn't seem to want to work right. Crag however leapt from her lap, scuttling back a ways and looking back at her wide eyed.
"MEOW!" Crag took off out of her sight. "Meow!"
She sighed and let her head lay back down...
She was tired a lot now. Why was she soo tired…
She had to write a paper... She had to…
...get this stuff off her eyes…
As she shut them she could make out Crag meowing audibly in another room…
"What is it Crag-"
Eyes, mouth, blagh... tired, paper... future tv…
Her eyes opened for the third time, finding herself back in the bedroom. It was dark now. The only light coming from the hall way, door slightly ajar. She momentarily wondered if she had used the bathroom at all today…
Did she eat?
Wait how was she moving from room to room?
Her brain puttered along at the speed a kin to a golf cart. Blinking to clear her vision she looked to the side again, turning her neck and looking around.
No Lynn bed... No clock…
Just a wardrobe... Wait... I've seen that before... Its mom and dads?
Indeed the old wardrobe was her parents. It used to be in their room.
Did they get a new one?
Before that thought could continue there was a voice outside the door. It was muffled but seemed be getting closer and clearer. No wait... there was two?
"-be right there, I'm just gonna check on her."
The door pushed open and for the first time since she had awoken a human figure came into view. The person walked to her bedside, straightening her head a bit and brushing her hair flat with their hands.
Felt nice... She shut her eyes a bit and relaxed under the soothing touches. The silhouette hummed softly before taking a blanket from the bottom of the bed and tucking her in. Then they returned and kissed her on the forehead.
"Goodnight sweetie, we love you so,so much..." They said, their voice wispy and feeble. She couldn't make out much of their face in the dark, but she knew that voice anywhere.
Mom.
The hair looked different somehow but that's who it was. She was too tired, however, to ask about the changes to the woman's appearance or what had happened all day. So she just decided to roll with it... she was sleepy again anyway... need to figure out why I'm so tired now... later on... after sleep…
"Luff you tooo." She grumbled…
Her mother froze.
Just knelt over her, locked in place, hands hovering as she seemed to stop breathing. At first Lucy felt concern…
Was there a gas leak in here? Is That why she was like this? Why was mom doing that?
After a few seconds the woman shuttered, hands shaking and she quickly stood up, leaning over her daughter with hands on the girl's shoulders. She was stalk still for a few moment, taking a ragged breath before speaking in a broken tone.
"L-lucy?"
"Hmmm...?" Lucy responded, blinking up at her.
Rita Loud emitted a sound similar to a dry sob, shaking as she took Lucy's head in her hands. She seemed too shocked to move for a few seconds, grappling inside herself before running for the door, throwing it open and slamming it back on the wall.
"LYNNARD!" Someone was running down the hall, knocking over things over if the crashing noise was any indication. "LYNNARD!" Mom screamed again as another figure came into view.
"What is it?! Is she not breathing?! WHERE'S THE VENTILATOR!?" It was dad. He ripped open a door across the hall and began to root inside. "Dammit it should be right up front, like we plan!"
"No, honey!" Rita grabbed her husband's shoulder and whimpered. "She's awake..."
The man stopped his searching, but stayed in the closet, hands holding a large machine in his hands. His wife held his shoulders tightly. "Lynnard... Lucy's finally..."
The box fell from his hands with a thud, they both turned to hurried back to her, turning on the lights as they did so. Lucy winced at the brightness, moaning unhappily.
"Lucy..." Dad knelt beside her, mom poised over his shoulder in worry. He quickly brushed some hair from her face and clearing her vision a bit. "Lucy, honey do you... do you know who we are?"
The question threw her. "W-whaaaa?" She grumbled.
"Our names, sweety. Who we are to you... anything?" Rita asked softly, clenched her husband's shoulder in a death grip.
Lucy blinked again, half confused and half blinded by the ceiling light. "M-mom and dad?" She grunted.
"Oh my god Lynnard..." Mom whispered as he reached up his hand to take her own. They held each other's hands tightly.
"Lucy... hon, what do you remember before... waking up?"
Oh. Well there a question... what did she remember? Wait! Wait there was something…
"Paper...Paper for school... gonna be late..." Lucy murmured, wincing as she thought about it. She should have started way earlier, her parents were gonna be disappointed if she failed this... "Sorry..."
"No! No Lucy, its.. its fine honey. Don't worry about that..." Rita said, taking to stroking the side of Lucy's face. "Don't worry about that anymore..."
Don't worry about school?
"Why?" Lucy asked quietly.
Her parents paused, sharing a pained look before her father seemed to steel himself, forcing a sad smile. "Its... no reason, honey... Just relax." He turned to his wife and spoke to her softly. "Call her."
She stands uncertainly, wavering in indecision, staring at Lucy before her husband nudged her. "Rita, Call her." She gave a shaky nod before turning and running out of the room.
Lucy looks back to her father, watching him take her own hand and lift it into the air with his grasp... She could sense the pressure and warmth of his hold but all other feeling got wonky after that... Like where or how he was holding it.
She tried to hold it back... She watched her hand not even respond. There was no change or movement.
That had happened earlier to... in the chair…
"I.. can't move my hand..." Lucy murmured, still not as worried as she supposed she should be... He father only responded by clutching her hand in both of his own, squeezing it softly and looking back to the hallway where his wife was returning with a phone to her ear.
"-Not sure h-how long she's been back, but she's coherent. Well kind of coherent. Maybe a little slow. I- Not she's still breathing fine and she remembers us and having a school paper due. I just... it been so long, what if-" She paused, looking very flustered and listening to the phone. "Fifteen minutes. Alright, bring an overnight bag if you want, you can take the guest room."
Who was sleeping over?
And why was she so tired still?
"I'm really tired..." Lucy sighed as her mother paced back and forth in the room. Mr Loud looked back to his wife quietly as the blonde put a hand to her head nervously.
"She says she's tired." Rita said softly, stopping in the middle of the room and almost hugging the phone to her ear. "Should she... Is it ok if..." She paused to listen again before nodding. "Alright... ok." She put the phone to her shoulder and came back to Lucy's side. Rita bit her lip but held one hand to her daughter's face. "Honey you can go back to sleep, its ok..."
The swirling competition of emotions in her mother's eyes made Lucy worried for a moment... She dosen't seem to WANT her to go back to sleep. Only its ok if she does? Ugh... Her brain wheezed at the excess information. Rita seemed to sense this as she forced a smile before reluctantly returning to pacing as she listen to the caller on the other end again.
Lucy shut her eyes, sighing when her father freed one of his hands to stroke through her hair. She tilted into his touch gratefully before drifting off…
It was later on when Lucy woke again. Her eyes weren't wet anymore, but her mouth was still dry...
Didn't have to worry about that paper anymore…
Groggily she opened her eyes. The lights were still lit and the blinds were closed. The room was different however... Someone had dragged chairs in and in one of them was her father, fast asleep and under a blanket. There was also a bedside table now, covered in small machines with a stack of paper.
What really catches Lucy attention was the electronic alarm clock placed at the forefront. The red numbers showing it was about four fifteen Am…
Still tired... Dammit.
It was kinda aggravating how it didn't seem to matter the hours she slept, she was still exhausted. She was half tempted to keep on sleeping, but her tongue felt like sandpaper…
She was dying for a drink of water.
Looking back to her dad she tried to sit up, grunting when nothing responded.
This was now a little alarming.
Shifting what she could, she tried to sit up again. And again... And again. She wheezed a bit. No arm movement. She tried another way... No LEG movement! Nothing! What?!
Ah, there's that horrible feeling she had expected before…
Whimpering loudly Lucy kept trying to move, well, anything. Fingers, toes, anythings. She started sobbing, panicked and confused. Her mind had only caught up to half its usual production and was finally able to realize the state its body was it. What to do other than freak out was still out of reach however.
It seemed her body wasn't ready for all this excitement however. Sobs turned to coughs and she suddenly found it hard to breath. If she were able she could have have just sat up and leveled her breath, but then again the fact that she couldn't move her body was what got her here in the first place.
At least she woke her dad up.
He snuffled under the blanket, sitting up with a snork. However it only took two seconds for him to appear at her side. "Lucy! Lucy, try and calm your breathing!" He suddenly maneuvered an arm under her and hoisted her into a sitting position. Pillows were arranged behind her, helping keep her upright as he started to pat her on the back and hush her. "Come on, deep breaths sweety..."
He held her head steady as she cough and tried to do as he said. Slowly the panic attack faded but it left behind a steady stream of tears and drool Lucy was embarrassed to realize she couldn't wipe away herself. So she whined again, upset at whatever had happened to her and upset at her current state...
What had happened? Why couldn't she move?
So tired... So thirsty...her mouth wasn't dry anymore but she needed something to drink to ease her aching throat.
She coughed a bit more to clear her airways as her father slowly let her go and allowed her to sit on her own. Her head dipped a bit without the support but she managed to lift it back up.
Something was working at least…
"Lucy, whats wrong?" Her dad asked, rubbing her upper back. She looked at him with her tear stained and spit covered face... trying to speak past the cotton in her head.
"I can't- and ... my arms are... I'm really thirsty!" It felt stupid to say, but that was all she could manage to get out before starting to cough again. Dad helped her again, clapping her on the back and holding her head.
"Rita, she's up and she needs something to drink!" He shouted, turning to the doorway.
"Coming!" His wife responded from deeper in the house.
They were left alone for a few moments, dad rubbing her back as she tried to catch her breath. She could feel drool dripping from her chin and could only stare vacantly at the end of her bed. The promise of water had managed to sooth her slightly, but the mess on her face and her inability to clear it kept anxiety alive in her gut.
Mom appeared at the doorway only to pause at the sight of her, she turned to someone beside her and handed them a glass. "Give this to her. I'm going to get a wash cloth."
A brown haired young woman entered the room dressed in a pair of pajamas. The shirt had a picture of the table of Elements that read 'I wear this shirt 'periodically'. The pants were purple and had large pockets holding a collection of instruments. Her hair was messy and she squinted as she came into the room, holding a clear plastic glass of water. She studied Lucy thoughtfully before handing Mr Loud the glass.
"Here you go Lucy, take a drink of this ok." He said, raising the glass to her mouth. Lucy swallowed with some difficulty, but the relief the water provided was wonderful. He pulled the glass away before she was ready, but she relent to his wishes and licked her dry lips.
Then someone took her by the chin and shone a bright light in her eyes. 'Nah..." Lucy hadn't the energy to argue, groaning as the light remained until she opened the eye to stare into it. The process was repeated on the other eye until the person with the flashlight seemed satisfied.
"No sign of damage here." The girl spoke, pocketing the device again and leaning into her. "Do you remember you full name?"
Lucy stared at her, trying to dull the burning in her eyes. "Uh... Lucy.."
"Lucy what?"
She blinked harder. "Lucy... Desiree Loud..."
"Where do you live?"
What? Lucy stared at the girl in confusion. "Here?"
"Address. Give me your address." The brunette said tightly.
"Uhhh... 1216 Franklin ... Avenue..." The brunette seemed satisfied as she snatched up the pile of paper and uncapped her pen, scribbling something down. Before she could ask any questions of her own however her father returned with the glass of water, giving her another drink.
"Your doing good Lucy." He said as she swallowed some more water. He pulled the glass away just as her mother returned with a warm wash cloth, wiping her face clean as gently as possible. The warm cloth felt nice and she groaned into it.
"How is it looking so far?" Dad asked, chair squeaking as he sat back.
"Its too early to tell but all signs show she may be fully cognitive thus far. We'll need more tests to see if this is true though." The brunette spoke setting the papers down as Rita pulled the cloth away. "Brain scans are good. She's awake and responsive. I'd say she just needs more time to wake back up."
Lucy watched the brunette check over some of the small machines. Eyeing her she couldn't help but ask. "Who are you...?"
Mom and Dad both stalled, looking at her quickly. "What?" Rita leaned in to cup her daughter's face. "Lucy you don't... You don't know her?" Lucy could only stared up her mother awkwardly, looking between her and the stranger in the room.
"Mom, stop. The last time she saw me, really saw me, I came up to her chin and had those thick glasses." The brunette spoke, looking stern. "She hasn't changed a day inside, we have."
Lucy stared, eyes widening in shock. "...Lisa?"
Lisa turned to the goth quietly before nodding. Lucy could feel her mouth open and close wordlessly as Lisa looked over the papers again. "She's been conscious for a few days now, only waking every once and awhile... the first few times she may not even remember. Its best if she tries to relax, instead of adding undue stress." Lisa sighed and put the papers back down to sit on the bed with her mother. "However there are some things we need to discuss... They can't wait, and even if we did it wouldn't help Lucy. In fact it's best to get it out of the way. I'm sure she's noticed anyway if the reaction she had just now was an indication..." Lisa rubbed the back of her neck wearily. "We can starve off more panic attacks if we just tell her the truth now."
The tension in the room suddenly raised. Lucy watched the parents before her look at each other nervously. "Lisa... I don't know if.. she's only been up a few hours..."
"Its for the best, mom." Lisa stared at the far wall as their mother stood again, going to sit at her husband's side and lean into him as he set an arm around her. The two held each other a moment before nodding in consent.
Now that Lucy could really see them in the light and was in a better position... She could tell. Dad's hair was completely grey, his bald spot had gotten bigger, and mom's hair was a different shade of blonde…
She was dying it.
Both were more aged, having a few more wrinkles and lines then when Lucy had last seen them...
She turned to Lisa quietly as the woman looked back, frown evident on her face, hands wringing. "Lucy theres no easy way to say this." Lisa spoke, taking a moment to glare at the floor before tightening her features. "You've... been in a coma for a while. About... eighteen years to be correct. You were in a car crash... and it left you paralyzed from the neck down." Lisa stared at her, giving Lucy a moment to digest this. "It wasn't a complete... It was a Level 4, ASIA B, incomplete severance at the C5-C6 Level so you'll have some sensory but-"
Car crash. Paralyzed. Neck down. Eighteen years... Lisa was still going into detail on her injuries and giving hard to understand scaling system results that Lucy couldn't understand... Whenever Lisa was stressed she tended to ramble.. Right now however Lucy didn't try to pay attention…
Car crash. Paralyzed. Neck down. Eighteen years…
Car crash. Paralyzed. Neck down. Eighteen years…
Car crash. Paralyzed. Neck down. Eighteen years…
"Lucy." Lisa had stopped talking and was staring at her sister. "Lucy do you understand?" The girl however just stared at her vacantly, face blank and unresponsive to the news. "Lucy? Oh crap..." Lisa came closer and put a hand to Lucy's shoulder. "Lucy, are you there?"
"Honey...?" Their mother came back to the bed, using the washcloth on Lucy face once more. "Come on honey, its ok..."
Lucy swallowed as the two crowded around her. "I think she's in shock..." Lisa sighed.
"Well I suppose I would be to if someone just told me that..." Rita said softly, cupping Lucy's face with one hand and looking her daughter in the eyes. "Everything's ok Lucy... You want some time alone to think honey? Its ok if you do..." She rubbed Lucy's cheek. "You want to be alone and think about this?"
Lucy looked between the two, eyes wide before shaking her head, chin quivering a bit. Rita quickly sat down and pulled the limp girl to her. "Its ok... Everything's going to be ok... You're ok..."
Lucy kept shaking her head, rubbing her face against her mother's shoulder. She could feel pressure around her back and it took a few moments to realize her mother was hugging her tightly. A pair of hands started to draw through her hair softly.
Lisa's voice came from behind her, sounding nervous."You can still live a moderately normal life, what with SNP wheelchairs, possible future medical discovery-"
"Lisa, let give Lucy and your mom a moment." Dad spoke suddenly, and the hands in her hair paused their actions, before leaving her to her mother's embrace. Lucy could hear the door close before she pressed her face into Rita's shoulder with a dry sob.
Hey guys! Spotty8ee here! This is just the start of another Loud House story I'm writing, and while this story so far has been fun and interesting to write, via putting yourself into a different situation, I am not, nor have I ever been paralyzed. That being the case, I'll never truly understand how it feels or the difficulties people go through when they are paralyzed.
The reason I bring this up is because I never want this story to be offensive or hurtful to people who are paralyzed, or to those who know/care for people in such situations. This story will take some twists and turns, exploring the emotions and trials of people with disabilities, and not everything will be 'inspirational'.
I want to ask readers, especially those who are handicapped, to point out if I make something degrading, especially if it doesn't pertain to the story. There will be comments from characters that are hurtful, but they are not said in this story because they are factual statements, they are here because hurtful comments are something the disabled have to go through at one point or another, sadly. Moments/actions of reflective self loathing and sadness shouldn't be taken as my own thoughts on the disabled, but just experiences the characters go through.
The main thing I'm trying to say is, this story will be sad, and I don't want anyone in a similar situation (similar in any way) to feel like I am trying to attack them, or put them down. I don't want to discourage any progress you've made or point out a lack thereof. This is just a writer imagining what it would be like if one were in such a situation and using a Loud House fanfiction to tell this exploration.
Finally, the last thing I want to add, if anyone wants to share, or explain some things about being handicapped to me, I'm happy to hear it! Anything you can offer may help enhance the story or broaden my perspective to tell it better! While I did say this story would be sad, I don't intend it to be like that all the way. There will be good times, as a bumpy road can become paved.
I dunno how often I'll update (I am writing a few other things right now) but I will make an effort! Thanks for reading!
Spotty8ee