Author: Christine
Date: 16/3/00 - 9/4/00
Disclaimer: I own...oh no I don't....well I own.....oh damn not that either....I own....I own.....I-- oh man I don't even own the Spray and Wipe!
Author's Notes: This is just a bit of fluff I started ages ago, had writer's block for a couple of weeks, and finished today. Hope you enjoy it!
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Chocolate Covered Conquest
By Christine
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"Frank you know I love the caramel ones!" Rachel exclaimed a little too seriously.
"Yeah, but so do I," Frank stated, trying his best to sound fair.
"Frank!" Rachel exclaimed as he raised the chocolate up to his watering mouth. "Frank don't put your slag all over it!"
"Why? I'm gonna eat it anyway"
"Oooh, no you're not!" Rachel made a made dive for the chocolate that was hovering dangerously over Frank's mouth but he miraculously dodged her attack. She sat back and glared at him.
"Okay how 'bout I toss ya for it?" Frank eagerly suggested. A little too eagerly for Goldie's liking.
"Let me guess heads you win tales I lose?" Rachel smiled sweetly.
"Oh guess you've heard that one before"
"Yeah, ok how about a competition?" Rachel suggested.
"Sure whadda ya got?"
Goldie searched the room. God it was messy! Frank certainly had a fetish for displaying his paraphernalia.
"Mmmm....whoever can tidy this room the fastest," Rachel smiled, she had him on this one.
"Oh Rachel that's hardly fair," Frank pleaded.
"Nah come on this place needs a good clean, kill two birds with one stone, you know?"
Frank sent one last pleading look to Rachel. She wasn't backing down. He silently said goodbye to the creamy caramel chocolate and reluctantly nodded.
"Yeah ok your on," Frank tried to sound positive.
"Good now what side of the room do you want?" Rachel got up and stood in the middle of the room.
Frank scanned the floor. Clothes, plates, bottles, glasses, scrunched up bits of paper; both sides looked as bad as each other! He opted for the left hand side- might as well leave the dirty socks for Goldie he decided.
"Ok where's ya Spray and Wipe?" Rachel confidently asked.
"Oh come on Goldie, its a race not a bloody house cleaner's seminar!"
Rachel took this into consideration; she could beat Frank with Spray and Wipe or without. "Yeah ok are ya ready?"
"Yep ready"
"Ok GO!" And with that Rachel was racing round the right side of the chaotic room throwing rubbish at the bin from all angles with amazing accuracy. Frank just stood and watched for a second in disbelief, man she wanted this chocolate.
"Hey I wasn't ready!" Frank whined.
"Just clean Francis, I'm kicking your arse here!" Rachel yelled back.
Frank but his beer on the table and then realised he was making more of a mess and picked it up again. He took another look at Rachel, scrunched up his face and started running around picking up dirty dishes from his side of the room.
"Oh my back!" Frank tried to sound convincing.
"No way Frank, you're not getting out of this-- there finished!" Rachel turned around and looked very smugly at Frank. Frank scanned the room; he could see carpet and lots of it! She had done an excellent job and beat him by a long shot but he wouldn't admit it.
"Hey you started before me *and* I was injured," Frank retaliated.
"Nah Frank just lazy, now the chocolate," Rachel smiled sweetly and held out her Frank for her well-earned treat like a dog would waiting for it's meaty bite after it had sat on command.
"Here, enjoy," Frank handed over the chocolate. This was far from ending though, it had only just started.
Frank took another swig from the green can that was a permanent fixture in the hands of his partner and himself. He gazed over the lid of the chocolate box, taking in the various flavours and imagining what they would taste like.
"Ok for the peppermint cream," Frank looked up at Rachel then down at the half empty pizza box that survived Rachel's cleaning attack. "Who can eat the most pizza in say...a minute." Frank smiled.
"Oh come on, you know you've got a bigger gob than me!" Goldie exclaimed.
Frank just shook his head and smiled smugly, he was looking forward to the delicious minty flavour. Rachel obviously noticed his smugness.
"Well come on I haven't got all night," she said impatiently.
Frank picked up a slice of pizza and indicated to Goldie to do the same. "You ready?"
"Ah huh," Rachel replied.
"GO!"
Rachel watched in disgust as Frank tried to chew obviously way too much pizza for his own mouth. She tried but it was no use. Frank glanced down at his watch.
"Thmmm am mmmmmm," Frank mumbled, trying to claim his victory with a mouthful of Supreme.
"Oh *Frank*!" Goldie yelled in revolt.
"Sorry, that's a minute and--," Frank examined where the pizza slices were a minute ago "Three slices Goldie to your, what half a slice?"
"Yeah yeah here ya go, would you like indigestion with that?" Rachel handed over the peppermint cream chocolate.
Frank took the chocolate from Rachel with the enthusiasm of a starving child, definitely not of someone who had just polished off three slices of pizza in a minute.
Rachel examined the box of chocolates that were diminishing at a very unusual slow rate. She took the last sip from her beer can and pointed to the chocolate box.
"For the hazelnut swirl--"
"Who can do the best job of pissing Hawker off," Frank butted in.
"If you do that now Frank I'll *give* you the chocolate," Rachel said amused.
"Yeah?"
"Yep"
"Fine," and he reached for the telephone and dialled the Sydney Water Police Headquarters number, of course Jeff would still be there.
"Yeah Sydney Water Police," Jeff answered the phone in his office.
Frank looked across to Goldie and smiled. "Yeah, hey Jeff, ah...how's things?" his voice was slurred and his face was the spitting image of a child that had just got away with stealing the cookies from the cupboard without Mummy knowing.
Jeff wasn't as amused. "Frank what do you want?"
"Ah you see, there's this *crazy* sheila who has just cleaned my house right out," Frank looked across to Rachel who just shook her head and bit her lip so she wouldn't laugh.
"What you've been robbed?" Jeff said obviously loosing patience by the minute.
"Yeah, of my messy house I have been"
Jeff rubbed his forehead and tried to stay calm. "Look Frank I have no idea what you are talking about but you are obviously drunk so--"
"And she made me eat three slices of pizza in a minute," Frank grinned eagerly in Goldie's direction and she hit him lightly across the head. He winced, "Oww what was that for?"
"Frank hang up the phone *now* and go to bed! And that's an order!" Jeff yelled down the phone line and hung up loudly before Frank could reply.
Frank looked at the phone receiver and over to Rachel. "He hung up," he said trying to sound hurt.
"Ooh Frank I'd just skip work for the next couple of weeks if I were you," Rachel said handing over the hazelnut swirl chocolate to Frank.
"Mmm, I think you might be right," Frank smiled and tossed the chocolate into his mouth.
"You know at this rate its gonna take us all night to get through the box," Rachel said pointing to the chocolate box only missing three chocolates.
Frank smiled and shrugged his shoulders "And would that be so bad?"
Goldie rolled her eyes, she should have expected that. They both took another can from the slab of beer and sat on the floor next to each other.
"Wanna try and walk a straight line?" Frank asked.
"Nah the trip to the fridge was hard enough"
"Yeah...could be costly"
"Hey what about charades?" Goldie suggested enthusiastically.
"Yeah ok"
Rachel placed her beer on the coffee table and steadily rose to her feet in front of Frank.
"Ok mate, for the coconut ruff." Rachel made the action of turning an old film reel and reading a book to indicate what the charade was to be.
"It's a movie and a book"
Rachel nodded and held up four fingers.
"Five....I mean....four words," Frank pointed in triumph, Goldie shook her head, the alcohol was really taking its toll. Then she left the room.
Frank watched in utter bewilderment, what the hell was she doing? "Ah, Rachel I don't know but I think you've forgotten we are in the middle of a game here," Frank yelled without moving from his position.
Goldie reappeared at the door and shook her head. "Its part of the charade Frank!"
"Well you didn't tell me," Frank spoke gingerly.
"Oh sorry Frank I'll make sure I give you the set of instructions before we play next time ok?" Rachel said sardonically.
Frank tried to look hurt. "Who ever thought of a stupid game like that anyway, I mean if you can talk what's the point of not?"
Rachel gave up and sat back down next to Frank, obviously he didn't feel like playing. "It was Gone With The Wind," she said as she took another swig from her can. They both dug into the chocolates.
"Since when have you been a romantic Rachel?" Frank said in between mouthfuls of Butter Scotch.
Rachel studied Frank's face; it was way too serious for what he had just said.
"I'm not, it was just the first thing--"
"That popped into your head," Frank finished her sentence "Yeah thought you'd say that."
"What? What's that supposed to mean?" Rachel said defensively.
Frank shook his head, "Nothing."
Rachel knew Frank was now truly drunk he always turned all reflective and thoughtful when he was really drunk; it scared her sometimes.
"Maybe I should go," Rachel suggested after a long pause.
Frank looked thoughtfully at Rachel, his eyes searching her face. He really didn't want her to leave.
"But we haven't finished the chocolates yet"
They both looked at the chocolate box and started to laugh.
"Shit! Where'd they go?" Frank asked genuinely surprised. There was one solitary chocolate left in the middle of the box surrounded by empty spaces.
Rachel studied the box lid. "Turkish Delight hey? What do you want for it?"
Frank paused and looked down at his beer can and innocently back up at Rachel. Their faces were only centimetres apart.
"A goodnight kiss?" Frank said as his face softened.
Rachel turned her head to face Frank. Her eyes darted back an fourth, trying to read his emotions. She slowly leaned in until their lips briefly touched.
Frank looked caringly at his best friend as she smiled a dimpled smile and he reached for the chocolate and placed it in her hands. She put it straight back in the box again and caught her partner's confused gaze. "I don't really like Turkish Delight you know?"
"Really?" Frank smiled.
Rachel nodded. "Yeah really"
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The End! Thanks for reading!