Yearning. Want. Love. I'd known what it looked like. I'd known what the people do, how they act. But never how it felt. In some ways, it's awful, that combination of desire and butterflies in the pit of your stomach.
I'd always gotten what I'd wanted, however momentarily. It used to be a constant cycle of "want" to "ask" to "take" and then all over again. Every time, over and over, until I met her.
She was the first person who ever walked away from me, who ever denied me something I wanted and asked for. The "want" and the "ask" were there, but I couldn't just "take" her.
I tried and she walked away as I called her name. It doesn't get better with time. The hours and days don't make me want her less, they just burn away the resistance I have in this all-consuming yearning. I called her name and she walked away. I just wanted her to smile.