THE AGONY OF SWIPER
by
Iosephus
One of these days i'm going to kill
That friggen monkey
His big shoes, his vacant smile,
his crackpipe stare.
Dora's little pet,
Dora's shadow
Ive seen them playing together
She was laughing with him
I advanced upon them
I wouldv'e taken that beachball they had
But looking right at me
with those big almond eyes she said
"Swiper no swiping"
and shamed me.
Pull yourself together, Swiper,
Remember who you are.
Intrepid warrior of the forest
Quadrapedal Robin Hood
Peerless in excecution
Beautiful in form
Sleek, orange and bushy tailed,
You are excellence!
Pray, Swiper, dont lose yourself,
You who it took so long to find
Be proud
And take solace in your virtue
Dwell not on some two-legs
And her little monkey friend,
Why does she spend time with him?
Monkeys are traitors to the animals!
Think not of her frilly yellow socks
Her tasty candy bracelet
Envy not her talking backpack
Swiper, you know better
Don't let a madness steal your mind
How can I allow lies
To destroy who I am?
Why don't I care
anymore?
O' mother of foxes,
Pray help me!
I am a tempest
I know what I could do
that would make things right
I could get help
or I could run away,
far from here
take up swiping somewhere else
But then I wouldn't have
That moment anymore
She looks at me
and she says
"Swiper, No Swiping"
and for just
one passing
second
of eternity
I am all there is
To her
Then inside I die
I have lost too much,
but the lie is too sweet
And so I drink…
…Stupid little brat
She'll never realize
I don't really want her stuff!