It was 8:00 AM in Soleanna castle town, famed seaside city of the sun god, Solaris. I had just slipped on my classic power sneakers and prepared to go fast for my morning sprint. I swear though, these shoes the guy at the shop sold me were the slow down boots because I was running at five miles per hour when I should be zooming at Mach speeds. I was never a natural born athlete but when duty calls, you just have to run. That's my motto, if you got time to lean, you got time to speed.
Who am I? I'm Sandro, Sandro Hedges, just an easy going guy who loves the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise. Well most of it, personally I felt it went downhill after Sonic 3 and Knuckles but I digress. Right now I had a mission to do: Get my speed training in so I'd be in top shape to defend the city.
Wearing my classic red shoes and a t-shirt with the original Genesis games logo printed on it, I inserted my earbuds and blasted my work out jam, the "Power Sneakers Jingle," on repeat over my music player. I jogged on the pavement through the sunny locale, crossing bridges over the cities many canals and running past friends and neighbors on their early morning routines. Soleanna is such a relaxing place, some would even say it's boring but since I'm a good guy, I'd never degrade the location I'm supposed to save. There was only one thing I despised about it however and it stood wagging its tail from behind an outlet full of picnic tables: Pele the beloved dog. Every morning the stupid kid who owned him would let him wander on his own, terrorizing both the town and myself.
As soon as we locked eyes, he'd tear after me not living up to his title of 'beloved' at all. You'd think being a Sonic fan and all I'd have a natural animal magnetism to me but nope, that dog would chomp at my speedy heels every chance he got. As I ran faster, I began to rip apart space and time so much I started to smell…actually on second thought, I think it was these cruddy shoes. They were made of a cheap leather that smelled truly repugnant in the sun and my sweat drenched shirt wasn't helping matters either. It was reasons like this why I shouldn't be wearing collector's items as workout attire. Well, that and everyone laughs at me when I do.
As I ran, I saw Pinto the ginger haired scamp who owned this wretched canine. When he saw us running, he yelled "Pele, I missed you! Thank you, Sandro!" Fortunately, the dog ran straight to his arms and away from my feet. Pinto always misplaced his stupid dog despite claiming to love him so much. "Hey, I found your dog. Where are my rings?" I asked with my arms crossed.
"Sandro," Pinto said, petting his dog "You're too slow for me to give you any rings. I'd probably give you a D rank, tops."
My hands sunk and I marveled at the ground. It was so hard being a hero with a low top speed. Due to the low amount of rings I'd get from my ungrateful employers, I had to live with my mother. I trudged back to her house, out of breath with my shoes stinking worse than a dead hedgehog. As soon as I walked in our two story condo, I immediately caught hellfire from my mom.
"Sandro." My bespectacled middle aged mother nagged "When are you going you going to get a real job like your brother Shadi?"
Shadi Hedges, my taller, darker haired younger brother was the sole reason we could afford this condo. He worked as an operative for the Guardian Unit of Nations, otherwise known as G.U.N. and was part of the Soleanna unit that protected our fair island. The Sol squadron was praised by the nation's monarch Princess Elise herself and that fact alone drove me to madness. Here I wasn't able to scrounge up some meager rings to buy groceries and mister dark and mysterious was engaging in secret missions only known by the heads of Soleanna and the United Federation themselves. Still, even I knew he had a weak point; he liked those godawful Sonic Adventure games. That's when the series really started to take a turn for the worst. No man of his taste could ever be a hit with the ladies when he didn't even have respect for the classics. The Genesis titles may have been past his time but that's no excuse, and therein lied the Achilles heel of a perfect man.
I retreated upstairs to my room, otherwise known as my Sonic sanctuary. My walls were lined with Sonic posters featuring the potbellied blue blur back before his eyes turned green and his limbs were extended. Next to them were glass cabinets crammed with plushies of Sonic, Eggman, Knuckles and Tails that I pillaged from UFO catcher machines at those kiddie arcades in the 90s. I also had mint copies of Sonic the Hedgehog, Sonic The Hedgehog 2, Sonic 3, Sonic and Knuckles and the numerous spin off games for the Genesis and Saturn. Begrudgingly, I even owned Sonic Adventures 1 and 2 for the Dreamcast. Hey, even I was curious how Sonic would make his 3D leap to compete with that accursed red hatted plumber and while it was cool at the time, today I give a resounding 'meh' when I think of all the damage it did to his legacy. If it were up to me, I'd nuke it all and bring things back to the classic side scrolling days of yore.
I came to the two most treasured pieces of artifact in my collection. My custom made Sonic mask, which I'll get to in a bit and enclosed between two sheets of glass on my nightstand, a blue quill. I had a theory about it I devoted many days alone in my room to. It was the theory the legendary hedgehog was once here in Soleanna. There is little evidence to support this but people whispered about a mysteriously fast wind shuffling around the Castle Town's square at night time and well, it was just enough of a lead for me to want to stake out the place. With my gear and ultra-fast snapshot camera, I saw a strange blur whip at dangerously fast speeds across the inner pavilion. When I approached it, there was no tangible evidence of anything being there except for a solitary blue quill flapping in the air. Knowing the local wildlife was a bunch of photo realistic animals native to tropical islands, this unnaturally colored quill was mighty suspect. Still, what business, if any could Sonic want here?
My mom kicked the door open to yell at me some more. "You better get ready, Sandro. The Festival of the Sun is tonight and I want none of your monkey business."
"First of all, mom, it's hedgehog business. There's a difference. Second…"
"I don't care. I just don't want you wearing all of that riff raff to Princess Elise's ceremony and embarrassing us in front of the neighbors."
I sighed. "Ok mom. Whatever you say."
"Good. And I want you to stop trying to make little shoes for the wild hedgehogs out in Soleanna forest. I don't want to have you committed like your brother Silva."
Silva Hedges, my other brother who's defining characteristic was his nasally and mildly irritating voice was the secret shame of our family. He went insane from playing a Sonic game released after the negligible Shadow The Hedgehog, something not even my tasteless brother Shadi would do. The game was of such poor quality that it drove my innocent brother to absolute delirium and for some reason, led him to believe he had psychic powers too. That sad day in 2006 they took him away, I wept for both him and the state of Sonic the Hedgehog at the time. Out of respect for Silva, I refused to even touch a Sonic game released after 2005 and have kept that promise to this day.
As soon as my mom walked away, however, I had other plans on my mind. Tonight was the Festival of The Sun and while some would rejoice over the celebration of our sun god, there was no greater time for evil doing than that festival. I heard there were certain terrorist groups after our nation's power supply, the light cores and holding Princess Elise for ransom would be no better way to obtain them. I'll be honest, the castle guards of Soleanna who are supposed to protect her are a bunch of inbreds who only got the job because they're part of the royal family. Nepotism at its finest, people. The festival would need a true hero to do the job right.
I took the Sonic mask in my hand and placed it on my head. It had a shiny silver visor that masked my face and light blue spikes that protruded out in the fashion of the Fastest Thing Alive. You see, while you may have thought I was merely Sandro Hedges, the mild mannered Sonic fan, when night falls I don this mask and take on a brand new identity. An identity that fights bad guys and saves Princess Elise. I am Sonic Man. Tonight, I would become a true super hero or overshoot the speed loop trying.