Las Vegas' Finest

Fall 2015

She stood in front of her full length mirror attached to her closet door in her bedroom trying to make a stubborn section of her hair stay curled while also surveying her outfit for the evening. She had chosen to wear her favorite green dress, the hem stopping just at her knees, and black heels. Once she managed to fix her hair, she smoothed out a wrinkle on her dress as a knock at the door startled her, making her heart race. This happened often, whenever someone knocked or the phone rang; any loud noise of any sort sent her heart fluttering and knotted her stomach with fear. An unfortunate side effect attributed to February's attack that she was still dealing with despite the fact that it was now November.

But she was expecting company so she turned away from the mirror and headed into the foyer to answer the door. She peered through the spy hole just to be sure that the person behind the door was indeed her expected guest. Once she confirmed that it was, she turned not one but three locks, unhooked the top chain and finally opened the door.

"Hey," she said casually stepping back to let her guest inside.

But Russell didn't move. He was rooted to the spot, struck by her standing there, all dressed up, looking at him with those bright eyes that pierced his heart. He had seen her dressed up before at other events back in Seattle, but tonight she looked different. She was swaying from side to side, waiting for him to come in or at least speak.

"Hey," he finally said, finding his voice at last "you look, wow."

"Stop it," she said feeling her face grow hot with embarrassment "I feel ridiculous, this whole thing is ridiculous and you know it."

She turned away from him and over to the space between the foyer and the kitchen, her eyes landing on the spot on the floor where she recalled lying in a pool of her own blood while Winthrop hit her until she saw nothing but darkness.

"Oh come on Jules," Russell encouraged stepping into the condo now "it's not so bad, you deserve it."

She shivered at his choice of words, another painful memory forcing its way into her head, a voice, Winthrop's, snarling at her viciously in between blows to her head "You're weak, you deserve this"

"No I don't," she snapped presently at the voice but also at Russell, turning to face him.

She crossed her arms defensively and declared bluntly "I'm not going."

"What?" he asked confused.

"I'm not going," she repeated stubbornly, turning sharply and marching over to the couch where she collapsed on it.

Russell sighed knowing there was still so much pain surrounding her post coma and recovery. Physical wounds healed, but emotional ones stayed rooted within her, eating at her soul and causing her to react negatively to a positive thing. He followed her over to the couch and sat beside her, saying "All right, we'll stay here then."

She looked at him, confused and surprised that he was letting her win.

"But think about what kind of message that sends Jules," he continued and she knew he was trying to trick her into going.

"You tell me, oh mighty Zen master," she snapped sarcastically.

"You already know," he said "you're letting him win Jules."

"I am not," she insisted, crossing her arms defensively.

"Then tell me," Russell pressed "why don't you want to go?"

"I don't deserve it," she said plainly, feeling tears burn in her eyes. She bit her lip to try and stop them.

"Of course you deserve it," Russell said "it's an honor Jules; you survived something horrible and helped bring down a serial killer."

But Julie shook her head and said "It wasn't enough."

Russell didn't know what to tell her or how to make her see that her actions in February were heroic and her survival in May a miracle. She looked disheveled, curled up now on a corner of her couch, arms folded and sniffling back tears. He was about to tell her all the good that had come out of the case when she said in a tiny whisper "Do you know what he said to me?"

"What who said to you?" he asked.

"Winthrop," she said shivering whenever she heard her own voice speak his name out loud "back in February, when he was, you know, hitting me."

Russell shook his head, unsure if he even wanted to hear what she was going to say next, but knowing he needed to listen if this was going to help her heal somehow.

"He told me I deserved what I was getting," she said meekly "he told me I was weak, over and over, every time he hit me."

She started to shake now at the memories of that day, of the way Winthrop managed to convey those awful words to her, how she remembered them one day after her coma but kept them to herself for months. Now, revealing the secret to Russell on her couch this way made her feel, if possible, more violated.

Russell couldn't believe what she was telling him. He thought he had kept the most horrific details of that night away from her but this was something he couldn't save her from.

"Jules," he whispered softly "I'm so sorry, I had no idea."

"He's right," she cried, unable to stifle the sob she had been holding in, "I deserve everything he did to me."

"Hey," Russell said sitting up and closer to her "no, don't think like that, he's wrong."

But she shook her head, letting out another sob and reaching for the pillow beside her, clutching it to her tightly.

"He hurt so many people," she continued once she found her voice again "Kerry, Shaw, Maya, all those women, and we couldn't help them, I couldn't help them, and Ecklie wants to parade me around like some sort of hero?" It's not fair to them D.B."

She was shaking still and fighting back her tears. He slipped off the couch and knelt in front of her, placing both hands on her knees to try and calm her shaking.

"I know it feels that way Jules," he said gently "but you did everything you could, we all did, I know it hurts, but don't let it eat at you like this."

She nodded and clumsily wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, stopping only when he pulled her wrist away from her and wiped her tears away gently with his thumb. She gave him a small smile of gratitude for the tender care and concern he showed her tonight.

"You deserve that award Jules," he continued "because you are brave and strong and you fought him, that's the Julie we know and love."

She smiled a little more now at his reassurance.

"Think you'll be okay to go now?" he asked "it would be rude to stand up your date tonight."

He grinned and waved his hand up and down wanting her to take notice of the suit and tie he had adorned just for the occasion. She shook her head at his silliness in this moment and said "Yeah, I'm okay."

He stood by the door waiting as she reapplied her makeup that had been ruined from her crying, gathered up her purse and met him by the door. He held his arm out for her to link hers with and she did. They drove to the banquet hall where the event was being held. She knew the entire LVPD was invited but didn't expect many people to show up. When she walked in with Russell however, her jaw dropped in shock at how crowded the hall was. Every table was filled with at least a dozen people along with a stage up front, set up with a podium and a microphone. She felt her stomach twist into a knot of nerves at the thought of having to get up in front of everyone to speak.

Russell found the table where they were supposed to be seated and was now currently surrounded by her friends. Sara, Morgan, Greg, Hodges, Henry, Doc and David were seated around the table, chatting casually with each other. Julie smiled watching Morgan nudged Greg to get him to stop looking at his phone and pay attention to her instead.

"Evening folks," Russell said announcing their arrival.

The table erupted in cheers and applause for them. Julie couldn't help but grin at how much her friends cared about her.

"Julie you look gorgeous," Sara said.

"I love your make up," Morgan added.

"Thanks guys," Julie said grinning more, the sadness that had engulfed her earlier fading with each moment she spent surrounded by her friends.

Russell pulled out a chair for her and she sat down, glancing around at the other tables filled with officers and other important members of the police force. Ecklie was at a separate table but stood up shortly and went over to the stage. Oh no, this was it! Julie thought, her stomach lurching in fear again.

Up on the stage, Ecklie greeted the crowd and began his speech.

"Tonight we are here to honor someone very special," he started "though she has only been with the Las Vegas crime lab for three years, she has an impressive career with the Seattle P.D as well. She is the countries best blood spatter expert and a good friend of mine, Ms. Julie Finlay."

The room erupted in applause and Julie felt every nerve in her body tense up as Russell had to nudge her gently to get her to move. Her feet carried her clumsily through the crowd and up to the stage where she stood next to Ecklie.

"In February of this year, CSI Finlay was attacked by the Gig Harbor Killer," he continued "she survived his attack and a three month long coma, her recovery has been miraculous and her work with the lab extraordinary, for her bravery and service, we honor her tonight."

He retrieved a large silver plaque from a shelf on the podium and presented it to Julie who took it with trembling hands as the banquet hall erupted in applause again. She glanced down at the plaque and saw her name etched into it along with the words "In recognition for your service" and her heart soared with pride she hadn't felt in a long time. Julie shook hands with Ecklie while a slew of journalists took their pictures. He stepped aside to let her stand at the podium and speak.

"I uh, I can't thank you all enough tonight for giving this to me," she began trembling nervously "if you would have asked me a few months ago what I was the most thankful for, the answer would have been the Seahawks making it to the playoffs."

The crowd laughed at her sports humor and she smiled.

"But now," she continued no longer trembling "if you were to ask me right now what I am the most thankful for, it's my life, my friends, who are really my family, for my survival, waking up and being alive." I know now that life is so precious and I just want to spend every moment I can with people who love me and whom I love back and doing my very best to keep bad guys like Winthrop from hurting people." So thank you all for supporting me, believing in me and making me feel so, so loved, from the bottom of my heart thank you."

She began to choke up but luckily that was all she needed to say. The crowd cheered for her as she backed slowly away from the podium and off the stage. Her legs felt like jelly as she collapsed back at the table.

"Nicely done," Russell said to her.

"Really?" she asked worriedly "I was so nervous!"

But they all reassured her with smiles and praise. She sighed, relieved but that didn't last long because Ecklie had reached her at the table, insisting that she meet some "very important" people from some "very important" charity who were interested in hearing her story. She glanced meekly at Russell who nodded encouragingly for her to go. As he watched her be pulled into the crowd, smiling that pretty smile as she chatted with the who's who of Las Vegas, he smiled and thought to himself proudly " Go get em' Jules."