Title: First there was Darkness
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairings: Hints of Sam/Dean
Warnings: Spoilers for 5x22, character death.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything
Beta: None. All mistakes are mine and mine alone.
AN: My first Supernatural fanfic. That particular plot bunny couldn't leave my mind. Also I think I've read something like this before but I'm not sure. If that's the case then congratulation to who ever wrote it; you're story got stuck in my head. Wave you're hand at me and I'll give credit were credit is due.
And on to the story.
First there was Darkness. Then came the Light and with it Sam was able to understand. To see.
See the bond that linked Micheal and Lucifer. A bond that used to be so strong but was now twisted by time, pain and anger. Blood and betrayal.
He felt pity at first. He could almost see the their story from the beginning to this point in time. Their birth, the first strike, the second and then the last, where Micheal struck the final blow and banished Lucifer the pit.
Then came the anger. A fury made of fire that started in his heart and consumed him from the inside out. 'How dare they' he couldn't help but think 'How dare they manipulating his life, his brother's life, to reenact some kind showdown.
'It's over'. The thought seemed to came out of no where. Slipping in his mind, cutting through the anger and leaving in it's wake only a strange sense of peace. He had done it, he had stop the apocalypse.
Sure he was in Hell. Stuck with two brothers who couldn't settle their differences peacefully. But at least his own brother was okay. Alive, with the chance to be happy with Lisa and Ben. If anyone deserved that chance was Dean.
Sam was content. He had done what he had to do and now he could rest.
Then came the pain. It started in his belly and expanded to his back. Then to his skin like needles stinging everywhere. And the blood in his veins getting warmer and warmer until it was boiling and Sam could feel himself burning.
He couldn't run away from it, couldn't scream it away. Until the darkness came back. Sweet , sweet oblivion.
Sam's sense came back to him gradually. He knew he was standing, the wind made it self known on his face a little breeze, barely there. The sent of freshly cut grass came to his nose. The taste of something in the air. Not the purity of Heaven but not the taint of Hell either. And the sound of light bulb exploding above his head.
He opened his eyes to see a house. A normal suburban house in a normal peaceful neighborhood. Inside the house he could see a family having dinner, and even with seeing only the back of the man, Sam knew it was Dean.
The young Winchester felt relief take over his mind. His big brother was really okay. The thought to go and knock on the door came to mind but he couldn't make his feet move.
Sam didn't know what he was anymore. Demon? Angel? Human? A little bit of each? There was no way for him to be sure.
He still could feel the demon blood in his veins and the darkness in his soul, he was used to it, but there was something else he could feel now too. Something bright and powerful. Powerful enough to keep his inner demons at bay, he just knew.
He didn't know exactly what it was, but it felt like he always imagined grace would feel like, and it was in his veins and in his soul. Not fighting the darkness already there, more like cohabiting with it. Some short of balance.
What he did know though was that he couldn't knock on that door and maybe destroy the one chance that Dean had to be happy.
He knew that he would do everything in his power to make sure Dean could have this life, would have this life.
If he was some kind of angel he would watch over him, if he was a demon he would destroy any threat, supernatural or otherwise, that came upon his brother. If he was human though, Sam could disappear and watch from afar. Far enough so he wouldn't know that something was there.
Since Sam didn't know what he was anymore maybe he could do all three.
First came the numbness. Dean had lost his little brother to something that could not have been avoided. It was the only way, the only chance for the world. He knew that to be the truth.
The truth didn't change the pain he felt as he watches his brother fall into the pit bringing Micheal and Lucifer with him.
The truth didn't fill the hole in his heart that used to be Sam's presence in his everyday life.
Dean had promise he would move on, be happy. Have the life they both always wanted. But right now he was wondering if it could even be possible for him to do so without his Sammy around.
Even so he went back to Lisa and to Ben. The only people that still meant happiness to him now. If he could let himself be happy it would be with them. As they had their first dinner together in a long time, Dean couldn't help but feel that Time had stopped for a second, that the world had stop breathing for a moment, as if it was waiting for something, and then it started again.
The world took another breath, Time continued it's course and Dean ignored the feeling in his guts that something important had just happened. Let someone else take care of it for a change, he had a promise to keep.
The days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months and he started to get a little better. He slowly stopped to expect Sam to suddenly come out of nowhere with a crazy story of how he somehow got out of the Pit.
He started to really invest himself in this new life. Many thing have been said about Dean Winchester, but one thing that always came back was that he didn't do things halfway. He got a job as a mechanic close to their house, he drove Ben to school, helped him with his homework. Thought him everything he could, but not hunting. Never hunting.
He loved Lisa like she deserved to be loved. He was there for her like he promised he would be when they got married.
He named the child that came out of their union Samuel Robert Winchester. His nickname was just Sam. He couldn't bring himself to call his son the same way he called his brother.
The numbness never really went away, he just got better at ignoring it.
The months turned into years and Dean could call himself content. Ben and Sam grew up to be everything a father could ask for. They both turned into successful man, they both got married and had kids of their own.
Dean made sure that both sons knew to call him if they needed anything and if was a little more tuned to Sam, gave him a little more in his second son's time of need, no one mentioned anything.
Time kept passing and one day Dean woke up and he was old. Older then he remembered, or maybe as old as he felt.
It was a Sunday in summer. The sun was out, not a cloud in sight, and the whole family was at Dean's and Lisa's home.
The oldest Winchester was sitting with a beer in his hand and watching his grandchildren playing under the watchful eyes of their parents while they were setting a table outsider for the family lunch they had planned.
Dean closed his eyes listening to the cheerful squeal of the kids and the laughter of the others and a small smile appeared of his face.
He was definitely content. He had a good life all things considered and suddenly he knew that it was time. He just let go.
First there was Darkness. Then there was the Light and with it Dean was able to understand. To See.
He saw his brother standing there with a small smile on his lips.
"I've been waiting for you" said the voice he had almost forgotten over the years. And he could feel the numbness that inhabited him since the end of the Apocalypse, the numbness that he so strongly ignored that most days he didn't feel it anymore, disappear slowly
And he could see the bond that linked them together. A bond so strong that time, pain and anger, blood and betrayal couldn't break, twist or cut.
He felt a grin appear on his face, could feel it reach his eyes and he said: "Waiting for me, really? You're such a girl."
"Jerk."
"Bitch."
Dean was home