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Alone is how I am and forever how I will be. Not by my choosing but of fates. ~~~~~~~~~~~
I sit here surrounded by my friends and feel so hollow and alone it scares me sometimes. My laughs
are hollow as they have always been but no one knew me before so they couldn't begin to know or guess.
I'm supposed to love him and cherish him but I don't. Not all of our memories have been restored and I'm
not too sure if they ever will. I Just have this feeling that I felt the same towards him then as well.
Always for duty never love is my role and this is why I will always be alone.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Usagi had been sitting there around the table in Rei's room along with everyone else but didn't feel
like part of the group. She softly laughed to herself in amazement. She couldn't believe the way her life had
turned. She was Sailor Moon, The Moon Princess, and someone doomed to love a person other than her destined.
It was not a sudden realization for she had always known this, had always accepted it, but fot the future to
happen she suffered through this would never understand the life I had before, the real reason why
I wanted things to go back to how they were before I ever became Sailor Moon. Yet so much has changed since
then that I honestly can't say I would want it to go back. Just maybe the chance to change a few things. I
don't think I can sit here much longer for today. For once I was on time and do I regret it now, to sit here
and not be acknowledged in the way I would like, to suffer through her pressence here without anyone the
wiser. The unbearable insults tear at me though I never let it show for I know she never means it. I think
it's time I left for the day my soul can't take the torture right now, not so soon after I had almost lost her.
Usagi shuddered as she remebered the last battle with the youma in the park, she had almost died had almost lost her. The reason to fight, to save the world, to keep going had almost ended that night.
Rei looked over when she caught movement out of the corner of her eye and looked at Usagi. That last battle flashed before her eyes and knew thats what her princess had been thinking about. She looks a part from everyone else like she was never in the room.
"Usagi-chan," Rei's voice interupted the quiet afternoon and brought everyones head up,"is everything ok?"
"Hai Rei-chan," Usagi muttered softly." I should be going though, my Okaa-san wished for me to be home earlier today." Usagi hated to lie but she needed to get away.
Rei watched as Usagi grabbed her things and made her way out of the door. She couldn't help but feel as if there was something missing."Be back in minute guys," and with that the miko rushed out of the room to catch up with the princess.
Usagi had barely made it to the temple grounds when she heard her name called. She stopped in her
tracks not turning around not wanting to see who came after her. It was always the same person, always her,
never anyone else."Hai Rei-chan?"
"Usa...." Just as Rei had said her name a man in the shadow stepped out.
"Hino Freak, turn around!" yelled the man still slightly obscured by shadow.
"Leave me alone baka, we are not at school."
"And you wont ever be," and with that he raised the gun.
For the first time in her life Rei was absolutely terrified. After all the youma and multitudes of aliens they had battled never once had she worried about an attack from a normal person.
BANG!
Rei flinched waiting for the sting, the burning pain, but all she felt was something warm impact with her. Looking down horrified she saw Usagi at her feet blood pooling everywhere.
"Usagi,NO!!!!" Rei screamed and dropped to her knees in shock tears streaming down her face. "I'm supposed to protect you Odango...not the other way around,"Reis cried as she gathered Usagi in her arms.
Usagi could only laugh to herself. Now she was free but not in the way she had wanted but still wouldn't change it to save her. Usagi looked up into Rei's eyes, blood leaking out of her mouth,"I'll always protect you Rei...." She coughed a couple of times more blood spraying out of her mouth.
"Shhhhh Usagi don't speak. Save your strength."
Usagi laughed her last laugh,"No need...Rei...I love you, have from the first day I laid eyes on you.
I...I..will..always..pr...protect..and...l-love you." was the last reply out of her mouth before her body
started to spasm as her heart stopped.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" the gut renching scream was heard through all of Tokyo.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The girls had heard the loud noises but thought nothing of it as Rei and Usagi argued all the time. Then they heard somethin they least expected, a gun shot. In less than a second all girls were up and running out when they heard Rei scream. Instantly tears sprang to their eyes as Ami immediatly called 911 in the mad dash outside. By the time they had made it out there the person who had fired the gun was gone and Rei was craddling a still Usagi in her arms. There were no words, just shocked silence.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One week Later
Her funeral was the largest the miko had seen. Usagi was loved by many people. The girl was like a ball of sunshine to everyone and now shes gone. Rei hadn't done much of anything since Usagi's death. waking up just to wish she never did and falling asleep wishing she never had to. She remembered everything now, all the past lives not just Silver Millenium. In every life Usagi was the only one there everytime. Rei now understood all the looks, all the fights with Usagi. They were Soulmates in the literal sense of the word. For every life Usagi had been there for her in one way or another bound always to be a part of her. Rei wept and wept like no other and the only other person to know why was Setsuna. she had shown up the second Usagi had died with a horror stricken face. Rei later recalled that Setsuna had said there will still be a future. She didnt care, to Rei the future was gone.
Alone is how I am and forever how I will be. Not by my choosing but of fates.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 2 months later
The miko was only seen around youma battles, never talked never acknowledged anyone. She had been on the edge several times only to be brought back by one of the other senshi. Twice now she had attempted suicide, and both times had been interuppted. The first time by the outers who were more in the know on the Soulmate bond than anyone else. The second by none other than Mamoru himself who had always known but never said anything. She blamed everything on him. If he had told Usagi he knew she had not loved him then Rei would have had some time to have loved her and be loved in return.
The youma this time around was strong and she was thinking about not blocking the next attack. She was seperated from everyone else. No one would have time to reach looked over as the youma attacked Rei knowing in their heart of hearts that this would be the end for their miko. she had given up and they seen that she wasn't going to even attempt to block the attack.
All of a sudden there was a bright flash and the youma was dusted and a white dome around the fire senshi. The dome had dissapeared and a collective gasp could be heard from everyone but the miko.
The wispy form looked back at her senshi and smiled a small sad smile, then looked to the fiery miko.
"Now now Rei-chan, I told you I would always protect you," Came the etheral voice.
"Usa.."Rei reached a hand forward to touch her but went right through instead. Tears started down her face and she collapsed to the ground. Next thing she new she was being surrounded by warmth and love and looked up. Usagi had become solid and knelt down to gather her in her arms.
"Rei-chan, I love you and always will. I told you that I would always protect you. Our souls can not be sepperated. Till I'm reborn my love hang in there, for you can not live with out me as I can not with out you." Usagi helped Rei to stand to her feet and gave the miko her first kiss.
Rei opened her eyes from the kiss and Usagi was gone. Rei turned and looked up to the moon," I will always wait for you my love." with that she walked away never once looking back at anyone else.
The others had been shocked into silence when Usagi had appeared and destroyed the youma. They had finally understood the outers overprotectiveness to the miko. The bonded would usually waste away within a week of loosing their mate. Now the outers understood how the miko still lived for Usagi would be reborn.