Guilt. Guilt was the feeling in the deep knot that was her stomach. Even though she was happy with Savv, she still felt it was a rebound. Wouldn't it be considered cheating? She kept thinking to herself. After all her and Declan were on a "break". But what where the rules here? Could she date? Could she start a relationship? Holly j liked the feeling of being with Savv. It felt like a wild roller coaster ride. Like there was a shark in the water, but she didn't wanna get out. It was a Risk. A risk she was willing to take after many years of a non-risky, well structured life. But something was up. She still felt for Declan. (No duh). He was her first, for basically everything. She missed him and no matter how hard she tried to be independent little miss holly j, the guilt of dating again came back. So painful. She started throwing up every morning...