Clarke P.O.V
I didn't want to leave the camp. I wanted to be with the ones I loved, the one's I had went through so much to save. I had to massacre innocent people, let people be bombed, I killed people with my own two hands just to bring my people back. And as I looked back at their relieved and happy faces, I remember what I had to do to save them. And their faces were constant reminders of that. It was unbearable.
I let go of Monty and watched him head into the camp, a weak smile on my face. Bellamy stood in front of me, and looking into his eyes, I felt myself break at his gaze. Something about the way he looked at me undid me, and I hated it. I hated feeling helpless and weak. I averted my eyes, trying to regain my posture and breath. "I'm not going in." My voice cracked, but I stood upright and tried to not let it show.
"Why not?" his voice seemed so genuinely concerned and I shifted uncomfortably, trying not to let my emotions cloud my choice. "It hurts. To see their faces every day." I lifted my head to look at him, and I now just noticed how close we were. "It hurts to be reminded of what I had to do to get them back." I curled a lock of hair behind my ear and crossed my arms, our gazes still locked. "Where will you go?" I could sense hurt in his voice, and guilt swept over me. I felt bad for leaving him after we had tried so hard to stay alive.
"Somewhere. I'll manage." I uncrossed my arms and held his hands, looking up at him. I didn't think I'd be able to ever love after I had killed Finn. When Lexa kissed me, I rethought that. But I would never fall for Lexa. Not after what she did. As I felt the warmth of his hands and thought about how our relationship evolved since our first day on the ground with the 100, I realized how we cared about eachother deeply, and how we risked our lives for eachother. I knew now that love was not impossible, not anymore. I loved him. I loved Bellamy.
I felt tears escape my eyes and I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer to me. His arms wrapped around my waist and our bodies stood like that, together, frozen in time. My head rested against his shoulder, and I tried to prevent my tears from soaking his already sweat-soaked shirt. I hated that I had to say goodbye, and I realized that I hated a lot of things. I didn't want this to be our goodbye. And when we were able to say hello again, I wanted it to be precious.
I let go and before he could say anything, I brought my lips to his. They were warm and welcoming, and he returned the kiss without hesitation. My arms were still around his neck, his hands clutching my hips. Our bodies curved and our tongues touched ever so slightly. We stood that way, only us, until I slowly pulled back, our noses touching, gazing into eachothers eyes. Our mouths were inches apart and I felt like the world was spinning. "May we meet again." I breathed. I let go of him and walked away to hide the pain I felt.
I touched my lips, feeling for the warmth of his mouth that still lingered. And as I head toward the endless forest, I could hear the distant sound of his voice.
"May we meet again."