Authors note: I own Alex (she IS a girl). Rose, Box of Chocolates, and Coconut are REAL people, so I don't own them. Most of these characters are apart of an Japanese anime show, Naruto, which I DO NOT own. I do not own these characters, and I never will own these characters, so, the faster you get that through your heads, the faster you'll get the story. Enjoy!
Beginning of Show
Backround: -Audience claps-
Alex: As you all know, I've asked you to come here for a special reason, that reason being...
Rose: YOU BITCH! You didn't ask us here!!! you kidnapped us all and then tied us up and blindfolded us!!!
Box of Chocolates: She's got a point. Not to mention you signed us up for this reality show, and there are cameras surrounding us.
Alex: -grabs chainsaw- Shut the fuck up Chocolate boy.
Box of Chocolates: -Gulps-
Rose: -sighs- Alright, you either let us go, well, at least me go, and I won't bust out a can of whoop-ass on you
Alex: Tell you what, you never say that slang again, and I won't take this chainsaw and shove it right up your a-
Coconut: Hey! Isn't this supposed to be a T-rated fic?
Alex: -busts out chainsaw and slices through fiberglass- ANY OTHER QUESTIONS?
Coconut: N-n-no!
Alex: -smiles- Good, now, we are missing the most important thing ever...
Itachi: -walks in- Socks?
Alex and Rose: -fall to the ground laughing-
Itachi: What's so funny?
Alex and Rose: SOCKS!!!
Everyone else: uhhhh...
Coconut: Hey Itachi? Mind getting us outta here?
Itachi: -Spots Sasuke- Hey there big boy
Sasuke: -Shudders- Itachi, get the fuck away from me.
Itachi: Did someone say fuck?
Sasuke: Shit, get me the hell out of here someone!!! -rocks back and forth in his chair all tied up-
Alex and Rose: SOCKS!!!!
Box of Chocolates: -sighs and whistles to something sounding like Pirates of the Carribean-
Alex: -notices Itachi closing in on Sasuke- You Gay-ass!!! How many times have I told you? No raping until AFTER the camera's stop rolling.
Itachi: Awwwwww
Sasuke: Whew! Can you untie me now?
Alex: I have a gay rapist who wants you, and I'm not afraid to use him.
Sasuke: -sweat drops- heh heh heh, I mean, Look! Vault!
Rose: -breaks through ropes, grabs vault, and caress' it- Oh vault, how long I've waited for you, -strokes side-
Box of Chocolates and Coconut: What. The. Fuck.
Rose: -realizes they're watching- Damn! Can't you gay bastards leave a poor girl with her drink?
Box of Chocolates: Hey, we're not gay, we're bi.
Coconut: examines cuticles.
Box of Chocolates: -watches Coconut- Well, at least I am.
Rose: -Chugs can of Vault-
Alex: NOOOOOO!!!!!!! What the Fuck were you guys thinking????
Everyone else: What?
Alex: YOU IDIOTS!!! Do you realize what happens when Rose drinks Vault?
Box of Chocolates and Coconut: -reminisce- Shit, we're screwed.
Itachi: No worries, I'll handle this!!!
Everyone else: NO!
Itachi: -gets hurt look on his face-
Alex: -walks over to Itachi and pats him on the back- It's okay Itachi, you go eat some of the donuts back there that are supposed to be for the crew, okay?
Itachi: -face lights up- Donuts?
Alex: Yes...Donuts.
Itachi: YAHOO!!! -runs to the donuts and stands in front of them, looking back cautiously at the other members of the crew-
Alex: -Shudders- I don't want to know what he's gonna do.
Rose: -laughs uncontrollably- I know what he's going to do!!! He's gonna go and r-
Coconut: -Covers Rose's mouth-
Rose: mmhmhhhhmmhhhhmhihhmymhihihmh
Alex: -slaps her head and sighs- This is what happens when YOU GIVE A CRAZY PERSON VAULT!
Everyone else: oops.
Orochimaru: -walks in- who's crazy?
Alex: -screams- CREEPY SNAKE DUDE!!! EVERYONE RUN!!!
Orochimaru: Paranoid bitch.
Alex: Straight up Homo faggot
Orochimaru: Hey! -gets hurt look on his face-
Rose: Oro!!!
Orochimaru: Dammit! Every place I go, she's right there with me man!
Alex: She has that affect on people.
Orochimaru: Ahh. -notices Sasuke- SASUKE!
Sasuke: Fuck. Alex!!! Help!!!
Orochimaru: -giggles-
Alex: -stands in front of Orochimaru- Step off Homo.
Orochimaru: There are places for naughty little girls like you.
Everyone: -Twitches uncontrollably-
Alex: -Shudders-
Orochimaru: -snaps fingers and Itachi comes up-
Alex: Hey! I thought you didn't work for Oreo-man!
Itachi: Better pay. -winks and grins-
Alex: WHAT THE FUCK.
Orochimaru: -grins and points at Alex-
Itachi: -nods- Time for some crazy little bitch to relaaax
Alex: IF YOU TOUCH ONE FUCKING H-
Rose: -laughs at Coconut tickling her-
Alex: Rose!!! Help!!!
Rose: -stares blankly, and continues laughing-
Itachi: -reaches for Alex's arm-
Alex: -bitch slaps him across face-
Itachi: -grabs the arm that slapped him, and rubs his face with the other hand-
Sasuke: Wait, if Alex is leaving, that means...
Orochimaru: -purrs-
Sasuke: WHAT THE FUCK? I THOUGHT YOU WERE A SNAKE!
Orochimaru: Oh Sasuke, I can be MANY things.
Itachi: -begins dragging Alex away-
Alex: -on the ground- Help!!
Sakura: -poofs in- Stay away from my Sasuki-poo!
Everyone else: -Twitch twitch-
Alex: -sighs- WHY DOES NO ONE EVER HELP ME?
Box of Chocolates: It might have to do with you kidnapping us, tying us up, and then blindfolding us to tell us about something that's missing.
Coconut: By the way, what are you missing?
Alex: -stares blankly in reminiscence- You know, now that you mention it -heh heh-
Everyone else: YOU FORGOT?!
Alex: Well, so much other stuff was happening that i just-
Rose: -rolls on the ground laughing-
Alex: What?!
Rose: I remember what you lost!
Alex: You do?
Rose: Yeah! You're favorite pair of SOCKS!!!
Alex and Rose: -laugh uncontrollably-
Itachi: You know, I think this is better than what I was ordered to do. I was supposed to take Alex and r-
Box of Chocolates: STOP RIGHT THERE FAGGOT!
Itachi: -looks hurt-
Sasuke: Well, I guess that concludes the first episode of...wait, what is this show called again?
Everyone else: -shrugs-
Sasuke: That helps. So, that concludes the very first episode of The Show. Please Review!
Sakura: -closes in on Sasuke-
Sasuke: -still tied up in chair- Why Me?
End Of Show
Authors Note: Ok, that's it, I hope you guys liked it! Oh, and I will include the 'reviews' on the show (they will seem like fan letters), so please review!