Heyo, so yes get all pissed at me for being absent for two and a half years. But before you judge to quickly, let me explain my absence. After writing my first ever fanfic story and putting it on fanfiction I begun to get a lot of hate for not only my writing style but for my lack of updating due to me being in and out of the hospital and having to balance high school on top of all of that. I tried to continue writing as much as I could with the amount of time I had in between but in the end I didn;t have enough time or motivation to keep any of my old stories going. So, I silently made an agreement with myself that I would never post or be on Fanfiction. net again due to the occurred events. But here I am, I have hopefully come a long way in my stories and have a better way of dialogue and plot process. So, without further a due here is my recent story, Love through betrayal a fanfic about Tony Stark and Steve Rogers with slight Steve and Bucky. Also, THIS FANFIC WILL CONTAIN YAOI. IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT THEN DON'T READ UNLESS YOU ARE AN IDIOT 3. Okay enjoy.

It seemed like everyone in the world was looking for Bucky Barnes. But where was Tony Stark? The multi mega billionaire had dropped of the face of the planet after his encounter with Captain American that shouldn't have ended out the way it did. Defensive as ever for his friend Bucky captain America took Tony's help as a sign of vengeance towards Bucky and in the end took it out on him. Bruises and gash marks shown across Tony's face as his breathing was coming out in painful ragged puffs due to a few broken ribs from the kicks Steve's foot made to his stomachs.
"Don't you understand Tony? Bucky will never see the light of day with your plan. Death would be a better option on his part!"

Steve yelled hands frantically running through his hair as the reality of the situation came into play that he, the once noble ally of Tony, had just curve stomped him into the ground and beat him to the point of un-recognition.
"I was trying to help you Steve. I don't want Bucky to die either but even though I tell you that numerous times you never listen."

Stark heaved a cough after he finished speaking and tried to take a shaky uneven breath to calm himself down,

"don't you see Cap? Don't you see what you've allowed yourself to do and become?"

Silence resigned through the whole room as Steve took in everything that Tony had said in angst,

"why can't you understand Stark. I will not let him die or be locked away for something he couldn't have controlled. He's my friend."

Tony flinched at the tone of Steve's voice and slowly made his way into a kneeling position before using his one good arm to push himself up into a standing position and walked towards the front door of the house. He reached for the knob and grasped it tightly in his hand before stopping as the waves of betrayal and hurt wracked his body,

"So was I Capsicle." And with that Tony opened the door and slammed it behind him causing Steve to flinch from the sheer force of it. That was the last time anyone had seen or heard from Tony Stark. Captain America was to busy fighting for something he couldn't win and lost so many people along the way, and the rest of the world was out for our Captains head. In the never ending battle that Tony and Steve always faced together they never once left each other's sides. But this time, Steve had finally pushed Tony back into his hole and he knew Tony was never going to come back out. Steve didn't even think Tony would be gone for three years. Hell Steve wasn't even thinking of his almost lover's absence. He was to busy caught up in something that they should've been doing together to notice Starks absence from the world. And that's how it stayed. In the end even when he did find out from his old teammates that Tony had been missing all this time he didn't go looking for him. He wanted to save Bucky. And if that meant letting Tony go then he was going to. He owed Bucky so much, he caused him so much pain and discomfort and Steve knew he had to make up for it. Instead of adventuring to save Tony he saved Bucky instead, and after four to five years Steve finally managed to win. But the absence Steve felt like something important was missing from him never left. He hid it through Bucky, but in reality is would never leave him. He knew he couldn't keep hiding it from Bucky, his temporary partner would figure it out eventually if he already hadn't by now. He just, didn't want to hurt his best friend. They used to have a past together back before the war before the serum changed him, back then Steve would even say he loved Bucky but then he got frozen before he could even tell Bucky how he felt. For seventy years he was iced and when he finally awoke he was thrown into a future he didn't know if he wanted to be in. But then he met Tony. That beautiful brown eyed cocky bastard. His attitude and persona is what drew Steve to him. He immediately knew as Tony left him in his hospital bed at S.H.I.E.L.D that he had to see that man again. That's when the billionaire asked if he would like to move into Stark towers with him, and how could Steve pass up that miraculous offer? So, Steve went and moved in with Tony. For the first few years it was wonderful. Eventually all of the avengers ended up staying in the tower with Tony as well and it had begun to feel like they were all family. Him and Tony though had been dancing around each other in this silently communicated game to see who could flirt and make the other party go wild first. Everyone in the tower could sense the sexual tension between the two, and would make kissy faces or love jokes at the two whenever they were in the same room. But sadly, that's as far as Tony and Steve ever got to admitting they loved each other, because that's when Bucky came into the picture, and Steve no mater how hard it was knew he needed to forget about Tony. And that's just what he did. Or well he tried, the first few weeks after the reality that Tony was gone sunk in were fine. He couldn't feel anything but this overwhelming numbness take over him. He moved into Bucks room as they made their relationship as a couple official to the world, Bucky was happy... But was Steve? Around the second month mark, Steve started having nightmares. The most frequent one, was of Iron Man dying and Captain America couldn't get there in time to save him. Every single dream though, Tony would never blame him. All he would say as he looked lovingly into Steve's eyes was,

"are you happy? Because your feelings are all that matter to me. And as long as you are happy, so am I."

Before he would gently smile as his eyes slipped closed and he fell into oblivion. Steve would always wake up screaming Tony's name as Bucky tried to comfort the super soldier telling him t was okay that he was here and he wasn't leaving and even though Steve knew he should've been happy Bucky was attentive to him and would never leave, the only person on his mind that he knew would cure this was Tony. What had he done? Where had he gone wrong? And he would silently cry himself to sleep in his best friends arms as thoughts of Tony flew around in his head.

"Alright I've had enough Mister Rogers you tell me right now what the hell is going on with you before I beat it out of you myself."

Natasha said pulling out a chair next to Steve at the dinning room table in the well furnished kitchen. Steve, being shocked by Natasha's outburst did nothing but stare at her like a fish out of water until she finally rolled her eyes and smacked him upside the head,

"don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. You've been having nightmares again, Bucky came and told me. He said ever since you realized Tony had left your PTSD has been getting worse and according to him, nothing he does helps. We're all worried about you Steve. We just want to help by we can't do that if you don't tell us what's wrong."

She said more kindly as she grabbed an apple that was sitting in a bowl on the middle of the table and took a chunk out of its side waiting for Steve to catch up with what she was saying.
Steve, on the other hand was having a mental freak out. He didn't want to have to admit to the feelings he so carefully and diligently locked away in the darkest parts of his brain. Because then if he came to terms with them, the situation he put himself and Tony though would only become more painfully real.
"I'm fine Natasha, I promise. I've just been having a rough few months that's all."

And in that moment, Steve knew his choice of words had just got him into no mans land. When he made eye contact with Natasha, he could feel the promises of death if he didn't admit to what was wrong in the next couple of seconds coming off of them. Her facial expression had turned from caring friend, to 'do you really want to lie to me right now? You know I could beat you regardless of your super strength or not.' Gulping in fear he raised his hands up in a sense of surrender before spilling everything he could about his feelings for Tony.
"It's just, I love him Nat. But, I used to love Bucky too. I've hurt him enough, he doesn't deserve to be put through all of this pain. I owe him so much I can't just leave him after all the turmoil I've caused him."

The super soldier sighed in agony as the thoughts of Bucky's angry face flashed in his head. The judgment and hatred in his eyes all to real in the mental image.
Natasha sat and took all of the information in. Immediately coming to the conclusion Steve was more idiotic than they all had thought.

"Steve, listen. Bucky would never hate nor blame you for wanting to be happy. Hell, I'm pretty sure he knows you have strong feelings for Tony. Regardless of how subtle you think your being about it, pretty much everyone knows. He's not going to look down on you or be mad with you for making a decision that will make you happier. If Bucky were in your shoes right now, would you hate him?"

Steve had to stop and think, would he hate Bucky? If Bucky decided to choose someone else other than him, would he really hate Bucky for his decision? No. Of course he wouldn't. He cared about Bucky's happiness and whatever choice his friend made to be happy, he would support him even if it meant giving him up.

"I see what you mean. But, what should I do? I mean, I can't just up and leave out of the blue to start looking for Tony now can I? What do I even tell Buck?"

Natasha's face turned gently as she held Steve's huge hands in her tiny ones,

"just tell him the truth Steve. He deserves the truth."

Steve sighed and let a small smile fan out across his face as a sign of thanks to his friend. If she hadn't of come to talk to him he probably would've kept being an idiot and not only hurting himself, but in the long run hurting Bucky and Tony more than he should have.

"Thank you Nat, I don't know what I would do without you." He softly squeezed her hands that were holding onto his as she let out a gentle laugh before replying,

"without me, Captain Rodgers, you would probably be holed up in a ditch somewhere along with the rest of the team. Now go tell Bucky, and then go and find Tony you hear?"

She said forcefully pulling him to his feet and shoving him in the direction of his and Bucks room. He tilted his head back and nodded in agreement and started off towards the stairs. Skipping two steps at a time he bolted up to the door of his room and knocked, hoping Bucky was in the room instead of wandering around somewhere causing Steve to frantically chase him down. Instantaneous he heard a deep male voice yell, "Its open!" So he turned the door knob and pushed open the door to find Bucky sprawled out on their bed reading a novel of some sorts. On Steve's entrance. Bucky looked up and grinned. Throwing the book onto the opposite side of the bed and sitting up fully,

"Hey there sugar, are you feeling better?"

End of chapter 1.

Written by Carlita

and edited by Uno.