She was a girl with many double lives. One for school, one that was collected and knew how school was important and one that was invisibly masked with sadness. One for home, one that followed what her parents said and never felt as an equal. One for friends, playful and emotional and joyful was she with those humans. And then there was one when she was alone, alone and with her computer. She was happy, but it was a bitter-sweet happiness, typing and clicking away to another world...
Click. Click. "Oohh… Katsu-chan's on her computer again…" My feet padding softly on the carpet I walked on, I weaved around the papers she laid down on the floor of her room. She was crouched like L, a character from her recent obsession, the one I was modeled after. Kaitlyn had her lap top balanced on a small pile of dictionaries and her mouse on another. She been in her pajamas all day, a dark purple boyfriend tank and baggy-ish olive short-shorts. Nice. But where else to go? Hurricane Ike left her to stay home. She seemingly twitched under my gaze and, then pulled her tank down over her shorts.
Click. 'Wait…' Click. Click. 'I wonder what's she's doing.' I folded myself behind her. Leaning forward, I set my pale chin on her shoulder to watch her work. My long raven black hair fell over one of my dark purple eyes, blending with her own dark locks. 'She can't see you, or hear you, nor feel nor touch you. I don't exist to her. You take care of the misfortuned human that you to care about, but she doesn't know you exist. Nice.' I paused, relaxing as I felt the soft melody that played from the speakers. I started humming with the song as I played with the hem of my snow white shirt. The sleeves covered most of my hands; the neckline, always flaunting the leather strap that circled my neck, showing that I was already a Guardian to a human. I didn't care if I might be bothering Kaitlyn with my humming, because I knew I wasn't. Can't feel. Can't hear. Can't touch.
'Oh. Its that song. What was it called again? Oh ya. "Your Guardian Angel" by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. Its very tranquil.' I listened to the song as it continued playing to the end. The silence settled down after it, like dew in the morning. The clicking continued. I snapped open my eyes. They had closed and I didn't even notice. The scent of white ginger and cotton that came off her shirt was quite soothing. No sound. I peered over Katt's shoulder to the screen. 4:07 of 5:21. Nothing. No Sound.
'Hn. Guess the song just has some silence at the end.' I sighed in her ear. I saw, or rather felt, Katt stiffen under me. 'Did she feel my presence?' My heart's pounding became more evident as the song started to repeat itself. As the song started, Katt relaxed and closed her eyes. I got up and walked to the other side of the computer, in front of it. I looked at her face. Her eyes were closed. She looked peaceful, except for the tiny mark of concentration between her eyebrows. Katt opened her eyes slowly and stared at the spot where I sat. 'Creepy. You know she cant actually be looking at you but its like she is.'
She looked back down to her computer. There was no light in the room except the light that came of the lap top. She closed her eyes once more and then opened them quickly, starting to type swiftly. 'I wonder what she's doing. Homework? No. She's happy under that mask.' The clacking and clicking of the keyboard continued, filling the once silent room with now near-silence. I floated forward to sit on my knees. Looking down over the lap top, I saw small black letters pop onto the screen.
"Ah. A fan fiction. An idea for a fan fiction. You rarely have those. Only summaries. Never a full story. Always only the summary. Yes, yes, yes," I nodded my head, agreeing with myself. "Never an actual plot line. This is the... ah… third one? Yes. Yes, it is. You live for the reviews. To have acceptance somewhere." I looked dully at the nearby wall, eyes glazing over as I thought of once reading her first story, 'Symphony of Two'. "Pretty good, too. Pretty good. She is. She is. She just doesn't have the proof of people's opinion to prove it." I mumbled, voicing my thoughts to no one in particular. The other Guardians liked to think I was crazy. Maybe I was, not liked I care. I knew they were, too. Crazy I mean. The Shinigami were at least.
I twisted myself forward, angling my body slightly past humanly possible to be able to float over her to sit back behind her with my head laid on her back, my arm hanging limp from their sockets. I listened to her heartbeats and breathing that joined the sound of Katt's typing and music. 'I wonder what Katsu-chan has now done... Hn?' I pulled my face off her back and leaned forward to glance at my screen. Its was black. I glanced at Kaitlyn. I watched her now scrunched up face, a scowl that was matched evenly with a glare. 'What was that phrase? Ah! Yes. If looks could kill... wouldn't this computer be six feet under then?' I switched my gaze back to her computer. The screen was black. It was off. 'Nice observation, Sherlock.'
"Fuck..." Katt dragged out the word dully. I could feel the anger radiating off her. "The f-ing computer is off..." She paused. "Nice observation, Sherlock." I tensed briefly. 'Didn't I say the exact same thing? Yes. Yes, I did.' "The battery went out and I didn't save. Crap..." Dull and emotionless were her voiced thoughts. I looked askance at her.
"Let us plug ourselves in then. The generator is on, right? Ya, should be." She paused as she checked her ears for the generator's familiar noise. I listened, too. Katt seemed satisfied as she plugged in the computer to the extension cord. She pressed the button above the keys of the keyboard. The machine whirred to life and, in seconds, she logged back on. She was mumbling quickly under her breath, pleading to anyone out there. Click. Click. Click. The silence continued as the program uploaded. "YESH!!!" I pulled back abruptly at her yelling. I guess the computer did save. Smart, it knew the worth of its life.
"Crap on toast..." She spoke the phrase in the same tone as ever. "NOOO!!! I have to freaking start over!" She glared at the silver machine. "Do you freaking hate me?!" The computer gave no response. 'Like it would anyway.' I stayed seated behind her criss-crossed, leaning backwards on my elbows. She scoffed at the monitor. "Gah. Whatever." She clicked a few more icons on the screen and booted up Banshee Music Player to play 'Your Guardian Angel' again. She went back to typing quickly. Again filling the room with music and keyboard clacking. I looked over her shoulder to read what she had so far. 'Ah... She ended up writing the main scene first. Its not that good. A bit cliché...and kinda childishly written. She can do better. She'll change the wording later though. Wonder if she'll use this as the beginning...? Oh look, there's a poem at the top...' I read the first three lines:
Love: what is love?
a feeling?
an action?
an adjective?
'This is boring. Let us skip to the end, shall we?' I truly did think this was boring. I skipped to the end to get it over with.
it is a crush. the disappointment crushes you.
what is in a name but what it actually means?
My name is Sin. Am I only sin then? Many minutes and many repeats of 'Your Guardian Angel' later, she finished. 'Each letter in place perfectly, love?' I chuckled softly at my sarcasm. It took her an hour to rewrite and finish her piece. I reread that same passage from before, a now edited version.
" 'Mello....' I looked up at him, his head surrounded by a faint glow of the moon. His honey blond hair shined the softest of colors, wet from the night rain. So did mine, two or three shades lighter than his. I held him. His skin glowed luminous in the moonlight, like an angel in black. Then I remembered the information on his computer. "
It was edited only very slightly, but I liked it. The simpleness of the changes meant a lot. Going from cliché to a sweetly dark romantic. Nice. She ended it by adding a dash of author notes, a sprinkle of disclaimer, and one angelic title: My Angel. My Love. I read the last paragraph. She always put the title snuggly into the last paragraph to wrap up the story and I found it. Excitably I read the last paragraph with great meticulousness. In the last paragraph, the very last words...
" I could still hear the bells. I cared about HIS death. But not right now. I would make the most of all the time I could get with HIM. M. Mello. Mihael. Keehl. My Angel. My Love. "
"Just as good as always, love. You did a great job." I smiled and kissed her jaw lightly. Getting up, I shuffled out of her paper-scattered room, a small smile placed upon my lips, leaving her to bask in her own pride that was underlaid in an almost emotionless assembly. She smiled imperceptibly, but I could still feel its faint glow. Almost. Almost emotionless. Only almost.