Enjoy! -Sophie x
"What a day..." Muttered Connie, running her hands through her now tousled hair, sighing deeply. She was stood outside resus with her back against the wall, taking a breather when she noticed Zoe talking to Noël and Louise behind reception. She was smiling and joking like nothing had happened, when in reality, she and Connie had just watched a sweet elderly woman lose her life in their care.
Connie had no idea how she could be so upbeat after that, her heart was heavy just thinking about it. The nose in reception grew as more people entered, weekends always seemed to be extra busy. The clinical lead strode over to the reception desk.
"Dr Hanna we have many people here waiting to be seen.' Connie said solemnly, folding her hands and looking at her intently.
"I know, but there's no space for them." She replied, going back to her conversation. "Anyway,-"
"Don't anyway me, go start on clearing cubicles and discharging those who need it please." Connie said sharply, raising her voice. This caused Cal to look over to them from the other end of the desk.
"Don't you think I'd have cleared them if I could?" Zoe said incredulously. "There's NO. ROOM." She emphasised in a loud clear voice, as if Connie was deaf.
"Don't you dare talk to me in that tone!" Connie snapped, unfolding her arms and putting them on her hips. Zoe's face reddened with anger.
"Oh stop acting like you're so superior." Zoe snapped back, folding her arms."This is an emergency department Connie, it isn't your Keller ward-"
"Darwin." She interrupted pointedly, but Zoe went on.
"There isn't time to play office politics. Every single day it is emergency and death. Once you get your head round that-"
"Zoe..." Cal warned, walking over before Connie interrupted him.
"No Cal, leave it." She said, glaring right at her with her piercing eyes. "I will never get used to death Zoe, ever. Especially people who don't deserve it, like that lovely old woman we just lost. 10 minutes ago you were performing CPR on a patient fighting for her life. Now you're laughing and joking like it never even happened. I can't do that, it's not natural." Her voice wavered.
"Get back to cubicles. Now." She said sharply before stalking off, hoping no-one noticed the slight wobble in her step. Zoe stormed off in the direction of cubicles, muttering unspeakable words to describe her boss under her breath as she went.
Noël and Louise were left gaping at each other and exchanging surprised looks.
"I'm going to go after Mrs Beauchamp." Cal said before picking up a pile of papers and jogging off in the direction of her new office.
Connie meanwhile was pacing between her desk and the wall, absentmindedly chewing on her perfectly manicured fingernails, and deep in thought in the perfect quiet, until there was a smart knock at her door. Sighing, the woman went to sit down.
"Come in." She called, watching as the door opened to reveal Cal.
"Yes, Dr Knight?" Connie asked, trying to disguise the tiredness in her voice as the hectic noises of her department floated in.
"I um, have some papers for you to look over." He said.
"Really? You don't sound so sure." She muttered. "Put them here and I'll check them later."
Cal moved inside and closed the door, causing the room to fall silent again as he placed the pile of papers on the edge of her desk. He stood still for a minute, looking at her.
"Is that all, Dr Knight?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.
"No actually." He said, "are you ok?"
"Me?" She asked, slightly taken aback. "Yes, yes I'm fine." She said a little too quickly. "Why do you ask?"
"I overheard yours and Connie's uh, disagreement." Cal replied. "And I know how much the death of a patient can affect us, even the tougher ones." He smiled.
"Thankyou for your concern Dr Knight but as I said, I am fine. Now if you're done, please return back to the shop floor." She said, looking at her computer screen, "I'm extremely busy."
"Connie-" he started before her head shot up.
"Mrs Beauchamp." She corrected him harshly before letting him go on.
"Mrs Beauchamp, if there's something the matter then, well you can always talk to me." Cal said, looking at her with his glittering eyes. "Life's not fair and we all need a shoulder to lean on sometimes."
"Life's a bitch." She said shortly, looking at him. "And so am I apparently, if Zoe's snide little comments are anything to go by. I just don't understand how people can forget so quickly? How does a death in their care not affect them? I feel like there's blood on my hands permanently and I just can't get it off, no matter how hard I try." She sighed.
"I know I don't seem like I have any emotions apart from bitterness and anger, but believe it or not I do. I really came to like Mrs Hallaway, the lovely elderly woman that I was treating earlier, but then she lost her pulse, and ultimately her life. She was so lovely, she offered to invite me round for a cup of tea and a homemade scone, just before she collapsed. Then I lost her and I guess it just hit me hard." She said, her eyes brimming with tears that she tried so desperately to withhold.
"I understand. It's happened to me before many times." Cal said gently, coming to lean against the side of her desk. Connie stood up suddenly and went to look out of her window, her back shaking with silent tears. The male doctor stood and put his hand on the top of her back, expecting her to shrug him off, but when she didn't, he rubbed it gently.
"It's ok you know, to let go sometimes." He whispered as she turned and placed her head gently on his shoulder. Cal placed his other arm around her and held her gently until the crying subsided. But in that time, Connie realised that she wasn't hated by all of her staff like Zoe seemed to imply.
Just most of them, and she was thankful for the fact that Cal didn't, because she really needed someone then, and he cared enough to be there.