Clear blue water, high tide came and brought you in
And I could go on and on, on and on, and I will
Skies grew darker, currents swept you out again
And you were just gone and gone, gone and gone
"Hey." He says as he puts the coffee next to her.
"Hey," She says with a smile as she looks up at him, "You're here."
"You call, I come." He says with soft smile as he pulls a chair and sits next to her. "I mean, it's true that I'd rather spent Sunday morning in bed, but," He fakes a pout and closes his eyes as if he isn't happy to be here at all.
She shakes her head in fake guilt, "Oh, I'm such a monster. But last thing I remember was that you offered helping me with history, so." She looks at him with puppy eyes. And he can't help it but chuckle.
He pulls some book from the other side of the table and sighs dramatically as he leans backward in his chair, getting more comfortable.
"Okay, where will we start from?" he asks.
"Right from where we left off." She says as she turns the pages and focus on the book in her hands.
She doesn't notice when he stares at her, how his fingers play on the edge of the page, how he gets lost while smiling at her.
He wonders if she's avoiding his gaze, or if she's really not noticing.
... ...
"Yeah, but he seems fine." She says as she puts her books in her bag, while he's holding their coffee as they walk through the hallway of Whitmore.
He shakes his head as his eyebrows get furrowed.
"He's pretending," He says. "As much as it surprises me that he actually cares about what we think, but this isn't good either."
They stop in their track and stands in front of her to give her the coffee.
"Last night, he uh, he got it all out, I wish if I could say he felt better, but uh…" he trails off as he looks down, and shakes his head a bit.
"We should tell Bonnie, does she even know about this?" she asks, totally focused on the new mission, "I mean I'm sure she can help."
"Yeah, maybe." He looks away and shakes his head.
She tilts her head, waiting for him to say whatever it is that bothering him.
"It should've been me, thou." He finally says, "I should be the one who help him to move on."
She smiles slightly and pulls his hand.
He looks down at their hands, as her fingers trace around the back of his own.
He looks up at her, his eyebrow still furrowed, his jaw clinked.
"It's not your fault, Stefan." She says, "You tried to help many times, but Damon is just not over it yet." She looks deep into his eyes, trying to convince him.
"Besides, if you want my opinion, you've already helped a lot." She says as she pulls her hand and reaches for his arm. She tangles his arm in his while the other is holding the coffee, "God knows what Damon could've done if you weren't there." She rolls her eyes as they start walking to her dorm.
He sighs as he looks down then back to her. His lips curve into soft smile.
If she didn't already know how he felt for her, this smile would expose him.
But she does know, so she smiles back and squeeze his arm as they walk.
... ...
In silent screams,
in wildest dreams
I never dreamed of this
"It was 1942." She says as she shakes her head in determine.
"No, Caroline. I'm telling you," he says as he stands up from the couch and walks to her, "Gone with the wind was 1939." He raises his eyebrows in victory as his lips pull into a smirk.
"You know? Just because you were around when the movie came out, doesn't mean that you're right." She takes a step forward, as she folds her arms against her chest in challenge. "I mean, you can't remember all the events. What are you a robot?" she rolls her eyes as she chuckles.
"Oh oh," he says, trying but failing to control his dumb smile while getting bigger, "Someone is jealous. You know? I'm so sorry Caroline, but not all people get the chance to live in the thirties." He says.
"Ouch." She says as she hits him on the chest.
He chuckles, while she bites her lower lip as she pulls her hand, her eyes staring at his chest a little bit longer than normal.
And he smiles softly at the way she looks away nervously and swallows hard. Because yes, he does enjoy those little moments when she can't hide her feelings. You can't blame him for being happy, to see something of his affection on her.
Because when you feel something for a control freak, it's a victory when she loses control for once. Even if that 'losing control' is by looking at you for a long while.
If that's what she's giving him, he's definitely gonna take it.
"You know? I never really thought about the fact that you're that old." She says, pulling him from his thoughts, "I mean now when I think about it, it's like we know each other for five years? That's a quite proper time from my life but for you, it's like a drop in the ocean." She says as she walks past him to the couch.
He turns around and looks at her, and it confuses him the way her face turned into a sad, lost face.
"I mean, I bet that in your long life, you've made hundreds of friends, probably spent years with them and then you just, went on your own separated roads." She says in a low voice as she looks down, she doesn't look up until she lets out a completely humorless chuckle.
He smiles as he walks to her and sits next to her, her face is now back to the ground.
"It's true that I've met lots of people in my life, and yeah maybe I've made some friends through the years, but I never stayed with someone as long as I stayed with you." He says.
She looks up at him, and god he wants to hug her face as she smiles like a little girl, failing to hide the happiness in her eyes as they shine.
"In my whole life, I had only two friends…" he doesn't know why he can't complete the sentence, maybe because he doesn't like to give himself to the thought that she's actually gone forever.
She tilts her head, "You miss her?" she asks, thou she knows the answer.
"Sometimes I like to believe that she's somewhere, watching me." He says as he looks up, a sad smile pulling into his lips, "She's probably laughing right now." He shakes his head and chuckle.
He suddenly feels her head leaning on his shoulder; he looks down at her as she lets out a sigh while pulling her legs underneath her.
He leans his head on hers, another sad smile is on his face, for a completely another reason.
He holds her hand and lands them on his lap, his hand playing with her fingers.
They both stare down at their hands, they both smile sadly, and they both fall in silence.
But somehow, that silence says a lot.
They spend the whole night in the boarding house; he tells her pretty much everything about his past.
Of course he can't talk about all of that madness in one night, so they continue the day after that, and the day after that.
He suddenly wants her to know everything he went through; he wants to feel that she was with him.
So five years can feel like hundred.
... ...
"I say two more weeks." Damon says as he fills his mouth with pancakes, "Two more weeks, and they'll face it." He says, his voice muffled because of his full mouth.
Bonnie puts down her fork as she turns around and looks through the window at what he's staring at.
She sees Caroline laughing hysterically while he looks down and laughs.
Bonnie smiles and turns back to her pancakes.
"They're idiots." She says.
... ...
This love is good, this love is bad
This love is alive back from the dead
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me
"This one or this?" she asks, as she holds the two dresses for him.
He looks up, seated on her bed in her dorm.
His eyebrows get furrowed, he thinks carefully, as she waits for his answer, her face more worried than it should be.
"The blue one." He says finally.
"Right." She says with a smile as she puts the dresses down on the bed.
"Where are you going?" He asks.
"You mean where are WE going." She says, amused.
He raises his eyebrows and waits for her to continue.
"There is this party tonight in the campus, we're going." She says, without turning around.
He wishes if he could see her face right now. To know if he should add it to the list of "Losing control" or "Not there yet" list.
He doesn't argue, nor push. It's not like he's going against his well, in fact, he could use some excuse to be around her.
... ...
The party is loud, even for her. She should be having fun; she would, if it wasn't for the whole fight that has been in her mind for months.
The worst part, the most part that has been driving her crazy, is what is even holding her back? She became sure that Stefan wouldn't push; that he won't ask her again.
But she realized that she can't even answer the question for herself.
She doesn't know what's that thing that is stopping her from being with him.
She knows for sure that her feelings are still the same, if not stronger. So why can't she just admit it?
She keeps wondering when she will give in.
She sighs heavily before he's next to her and giving her some glass of bourbon.
She takes it and smiles at him.
"Someone is having fun." She points out as she glances at the bottle in his hand.
"Uh, I just thought, I have my sober sponsor with me, why not?" he says with a shy smile.
She chuckles before she looks around.
"Hey, do me a favor, if you see Bonnie around, tell me." She says.
"Yeah I just saw her at the bar, she's with Damon." He says with a smirk.
She looks at him with narrowed eyes.
"With Damon? As a… date?" she asks, clearly struggling with the 'date' word.
"Why? Are we on a date?" he asks, smirking.
"What? No." She panics, and his smirk gets bigger, "No we're not, are we? No we're just… hanging out." She says in a rush, looking around, trying to avoid his gaze.
"Hmm." He says as he folds his arms against his chest.
She wants to slap his face so she can wipe that smirk off of his face.
But instead she just shakes her head and says "Shut up."
They spend the night like that, she, trying to shake off any sudden feeling, leaving a safe space between them that have to be more than 20cm. and him being so amused with it.
When they leave, He walks with her to her dorm, his hands in his pockets as she walks in front of him.
They fall in silent, something happens a lot lately.
She turns around after she opens the door, standing with her hand on the door frame.
She starts to think that this smile isn't leaving his face lately.
"So…" She says. "I'll see you tomorrow."
Something in her eyes is new, he can tell. The way she swallows. Her eyes are asking him something.
"Good night, Caroline." He says.
"Good night, Stefan." She says with a smile that's definitely fake.
When he notices the slight disappointment in her face, he starts to wonder why he said those three words.
Was it really for her, or for him?
... ...
"Why would you choose Damon to go with you instead of me?" Caroline asks in disbelief, while Damon rolls his eyes and Bonnie sighs.
And Stefan is just standing there smiling.
"Caroline, it's not a big deal." Bonnie says.
"Ah ah, it is big deal my lady. Why didn't you tell me?" She asks.
"I thought you'd be busy with Stefan." Bonnie shrugs, playing innocently.
"That's not… it's not like I'm always with Stefan." She rolls her eyes and looks at Stefan, shaking her head at him with 'can you believe this?' face.
But he only smiles shyly.
"Oh c'mon love birds, you two are being so ridiculous." Damon says, "Just kiss and save us the misery." He says with a smirk.
Caroline is speechless for few seconds, her face turns to red tomato.
And Stefan just purses his lips, looks down and smiles.
"Whatever." She says as she gets her bag and walks to the door.
"Just remember that you started this, Bon." After that comes the voice of the door closing behind her, leaving Stefan to handle Damon and Bonnie's glances.
Why are they being so… married lately?!
... ...
Tossing, turning, struggled through the night with someone new
And I could go on and on, on and on
Lantern burning, flickered in my mind for only you
But you're still gone, gone, gone
"I'm not interested." She says to Bonnie, while looking down to her book.
"Why not, Care?" Bonnie says as she lies down on the bed next to her desk.
They're so careful not to use Elena's bed, they didn't even set the rules but it just happened.
"I'm just not interested." She says again.
"But you're the one who said that he was cute." Bonnie says with her eyebrows raised.
"That was an innocent comment about the look of some human being; it doesn't mean that I have to date him." She says as she tries to focus on the book in her hands.
"huh? So it has nothing to do with Stefan's vow about waiting you?" She asks with a smirk.
Caroline suddenly puts down the pen and shakes her head.
"You know? I'm starting to think that you're spending too much time with Damon." She raises her eyebrows back.
Just before Bonnie talks again, they hear a knock on the opened door. And who would it be other than the promised Salvatore.
"Hey." He says as he walks in.
"Stefan. Hey." She says as she sits straight in her chair, while Bonnie does the same thing in her bed.
"Hey, Stefan." Bonnie says.
"What are you guys bickering about?" he asks as he puts the coffee next to her.
The girls look at each other, and Bonnie raises her eyebrows at Caroline, tilting her head at her in challenge.
Caroline sighs and talks casually, "There is that guy that asked me out and I said no, but then Bonnie is being weirdly interested," she looks down at the book, avoiding his gaze.
His mouth opens in slight shock, but he manages to look okay.
"Well, the problem is, Stefan," Bonnie says, ignoring the glare that Caroline shoots on her way, "That Caroline isn't giving a proper reason to say no."
"I said. I'm. not. Interested." Caroline says through gritted teeth.
Bonnie rolls her eyes and looks at Stefan as she tilts her head, "What do you think, Stefan?"
He opens his mouth but nothing comes up. He looks at the girls before he finally get the words out, "I think you should give it a try, Caroline." He says with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.
Bonnie raises her eyebrows in disbelief. But neither of them notices as they stare at each other.
"You think?" she says, her voice stuck in her throat.
"Mhm." He says with pursed lips.
"Okay." She nods slowly, still caught in his gaze.
As Stefan leaves and Caroline looks back to her book, her face sad and lost, Bonnie feels the need to hit her head into the wall.
... ...
Your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave
Your smile, my ghost, I fell to my knees
When you're young you just run
But you come back to what you need
"Stefan, hey." She calls him as she sees him walking out of her dorm.
He stops in his track for few seconds before he turns around.
"What are you doing here?" She asks.
He tries his best not to stare at her red dress, he tries not to think about how short it is, he tries not to think about how her night was.
"Bonnie and I spent the night." He says.
"oh," she says, she suddenly doesn't know what to say.
"So, how was your date?" He asks, his furrowed eyebrows ruining the fake smile on his lips.
"It was fine." She nods with a smile.
His eyes are so sad, more than she can take it, she wants to hug him quickly and tells him that it was the worst night in her life, but just as she takes one step closer, he talks.
"Well, I better leave now; Damon is uh, waiting for me." He says as he starts to turn around.
"Oh, okay."
He walks away and she bursts, "Why are you even mad? You're the one who told me to give it a try." She says in anger, talking to his back.
He doesn't turn around, he doesn't talk, he just walks away.
... ...
He sits next to her, watches her as she lays on the bed, unconscious.
Her hair is messy; her dress has blood over it.
He suddenly feels angry. And he reaches his hand to hold hers.
She starts to wake up, and he finally lets out the breath he's been holding.
"Stefan." She says in a whisper.
"Hey."
"Bonnie, Where is Bonnie?" She panics as she tries to sit straight.
"She's fine, it's okay." He says and squeezes her hand to assure her.
She looks down at their hands and back to him when he sighs.
She tilts her head as she looks at him.
"Stefan?" She says.
"You've no idea what I've been through today." He lets out a breath.
He just feels that his chest is so heavy.
"I'm sorry." She says, her eyes starting to fill with tears.
He shakes his head and pulls her into hug, he feels her hands at his back, barely touching him, while his hands are holding her tight it would've hurt if she wasn't a vampire.
He squeezes his eyes shot and buries his face into her neck. He doesn't say anything, not that he needs to.
It takes her few seconds before her hands start to actually hold him, he can feel her hands griping at the middle of his back, her fingers holding that little piece of his shirt.
He can also feel her hot tears on his shoulder, and it only makes him hold her closer.
She pulls back a little bit; her face is only few inches apart from his. His hands are still on her back, while her hands move to his shoulders.
He swallows hard as he watches her wet cheek, glowing in the orange light.
Her eyes drift down to his lips, and she feels the place tighten around her, she feels her skin burning from his eyes.
He doesn't move, waits for her.
But she suddenly closes her eyes and shakes her head slightly.
And that's all what he needs to know that it's not time yet.
It's funny that the closer he is, the more he loses his patience. But he does nothing about it. He pulls her again for a hug and closes his eyes.
Her head is buried in his neck, her hands hold on to his chest.
Her sobs are silent, muffled into his chest, but her body is shaking.
"I'm sorry, Stefan." She says through her
"Shhh, it's okay." He whispers to her hair, as he rubs her back, "I got it, it's okay."
... ...
Their laughter echo through her house, her head falls back, and her hand move to her stomach as she can't breathe from laughing, while he's sitting in the chair in front of her, wrinkles formed around his eyes, she thinks she might've heard him giggle, and it make the adrenaline gets higher through her veins.
"I didn't say it that way." He says through her laughers.
"You should've seen your face," she pauses as she tries to settle her breath, "You were so disgusted." And then she laughes again.
"Oh god." She says as she sighs. She wipes her lashes as her eyes are filled with water.
He looks at her with a smile as she lets out another giggle, he can't remember when was the last time he's seen her crying because of happiness.
He stands up and moves to the other side of the living room.
"Where are you going?" she asks as she turns around in her chair.
He doesn't answer, but after few seconds she hears some music.
"Stefan?" she says.
He walks to her in silent, still having the same smile on his face. When she looks into his eyes, she feels her heart racing, those eyes reaching for her soul; he does that thing again, where he looks at her as she is the moon.
"Dance with me." He reaches his hand. She tilts her head and smiles before she gives him her hand and lets him pull her.
He takes her to the middle of the room; the only light surrounding them is the bonfire. They stand for a moment before he puts her hand on his shoulder and the other one in his own, never breaking the eye contact.
She rests her chain on his shoulder as they sway to the music. She closes her eyes as he rests his head on her own. Their movements are slow.
Her eyes open suddenly when she starts to recognize the song, she pulls back and look at him, "I know this song." She says.
"It's when you told that I'd find love again." He whispers, his eyes lost in hers. She smiles slightly at him.
"And did you?" she swallows as her voice is barely above a whisper, ", find love again?" she finishes.
"Actually, I find something better." He whispers with a smile.
Their faces are so close; he can notice how she swallows. He can hear her heart pounding. They keep dancing.
Her eyes drift to his lips before looking back to his eyes, and he does the same thing. His fingers intertwine with hers.
They both get closer, their noses are almost brushing, before they both stop for a moment, but something in his eyes makes her kiss him, it's slow and tender, feels just like their first kiss.
He doesn't move, only closes his eyes and feels her lips against his, it's been a long time.
When she pulls back and opens her eyes, she sees it in his eyes, that one look that makes her ready to risk everything for him. Although she knows that she won't risk anything; his look makes the idea of him hurting her impossible.
They smile tenderly before she rests her head on his shoulder again, she closes her eyes and lets out that one breath that she's been holding for months.
They keep swaying with the music for a little longer. They are finally together, nothing standing between them.
They are ready for magic.
This love left a permanent mark
This love is glowing in the dark
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me