Relationship: Kate losing Castle

Genre: Angst/Hurt/Comfort

Rating: K+

Disclaimer: The only thing I own even remotly Castle related is the paper I used to print random pictures of them on.

Author's Notes: I know I havent writen in a while, or posted the second chapter for FATEal Attraction, but I recently found a story called Making Sense of the Songs by Norah Rose and she had asked for song suggestions. In the reviews I found so many great songs, they inspired me to start writing these songfics. So here is Someone Like You by Adele. The lyrics are always in bold.

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You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days
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November 3, 2019 is what the newspaper said. It's not like she was insinuating the newspaper was horrible at keeping time but, well, yes she was. It was still 2013; the best year of her life, and what she wished was Rick's. She had loved shamelessly, held him tight, kisses his lips, and lay in peace under his silk sheets. It was paradise, and she had never wanted to leave. Still didn't, but that little voice in the back of her mind had to keep whispering, 'It's over.' Damn, she hated that voice.

Slowly, Kate let her eyes take in every inch of the almost deserted coffee shop. The silence was almost unbearable, when only ten years ago it would have been paradise. She wanted to hear stories of faraway lands, chat up the day, and laugh loudly, no matter what the others thought. She wanted to randomly dance to no music and listen to insane theories about the cases she was working on. She was barely hanging on these days without him. That's why she had quit her job at the SBPD. That's why she moved to a small town in Missouri and became the local sheriff; with car break ins the most of her worries anymore, besides her wellbeing.

She knew he knew he was late, making her twirl around the thoughts in her head, making her nerves rattle, making her want to run out of this town so he'd never find her again. But she was determined to meet this head on, as she had when she was still a Detective. How had five years with him softened her so much?

The light ringing of a bell made her lift her eyes from her fascinating coffee cup to meet familiar blue eyes. She took a deep breath, trying to calm the fluttering of butterflies in her stomach, and watched as he slowly shuffled towards her, looking uncharacteristically nervous. She cocked her head slightly, and abruptly realized she was letting all her emotions play on her face. In a flash, a mask was set over her features and she relished in the familiar feel of it, though it didn't feel quite right anymore. Nothing from the time before him ever did.

"Kate." She heard him whisper and her eyes flickered back down to her coffee cup, which had most definitely gone cold by now. She felt the table vibrate when he sat down, the clink of the salt shaker when he picked up a menu, and the plunk of plastic seconds later when he didn't feel hungry, because he was too nervous. She knew every inch of him, yet he was gone, and it made her heart tear at the clumsy stitches she'd used to sew it up.

She heard Sarah walk over and before she could speak, Richard Castle spit out something that sounded like, "Coffee. Black." Her mouth fell open a couple inches when she realized the blandness of his statement. No, "Hey there, beautiful." Or a random babble of flavored espresso. Just 'Coffee. Black.' It made her heart sink when she realized this wasn't her Castle. Not the playful, cheery, annoying man she fell in love with, but quite possibly, a forty five year old adult. She shuttered at the thought, but shut her mouth and finally met his eyes again.

"Rick." She said with a crooked smile, and almost laughed at the way it sounded on her lips. In five years she hasn't uttered that name, yet it still feels like yesterday she accompanied it with three other words she has only said a couple times in her life.

Her mouth shaped words for several seconds before she could finally force some sound out of them. "I, uh, heard that you're settled down; that you found a girl, Castle. And you're…married now." She had to choke out the words with indifference and curiosity. It tugged at her heart, the word 'married.' She couldn't believe for the past three years he had been and still is in love with another woman, a marriage that will last the test of time, not just another mistake.

"Uh, yeah." Rick replied with a nervous chuckle. "Her names, Lana." He fell quite then, and she wanted to yell at him when he looked away. She wanted to shake him and say, "Old friend, why are you so shy? Ain't like you to hold back, or hide from the light! This isn't you, Rick…Castle. This isn't you!" She didn't of course, but she knew when he looked back at her, he saw that spark of anger. And the sparkle was back in his eyes, for just a second, but there, and the butterflies in Kate's stomach started all over again.

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"Why?" Kate asked with tears in her eyes. They were spilling over and onto the carpet, and all Rick wanted to do was hold her in his arms. It wasn't supposed to end like this, they both knew that. In truth, they both thought it'd last forever, but I guess neither of them could have predicted…

Instead of answering her question, Rick chose to say this instead. "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes, it hurts instead." And with that, he walked out her door, leaving her to fall to the floor and sob.

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Rick was staring at her when she finally came out of her reverie. She blushed crimson and took a tentative sip of her coffee, forcing herself not to gag. She then made herself look up and smile at him. Both of them knew it was fake, as was his.

"I hope you have the best life in the whole wide world." He said with a chuckle and stood from his spot. Sarah chose this time to come with his coffee. He took it without a word, took one sip, and set it down. He handed her the money quickly and smiled at her as if to say, "You can go now." So, she did, and he turned back to Kate, just as she stood and said, "I wish nothing but the best for you too."

Both stood in silence, wondering what to do, but before Rick could speak, Kate decided for them. She reached out a hand to shake his, which he took carefully, like she would break if he did anything wrong. She almost laughed at this, more a dark one than anything, and dropped her hand as he turned to leave.

Almost incoherently, before he was to leave, Rick heard Kate whisper the words, "Don't forget me." He almost turned around, but instead, he kept walking, right out that door like he did that day five years ago.

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The day they were to reclaim their vows came quickly, and soon, he was piled in with some many others in a small church he didn't even know. Usually things like this were a quite affair, but for Richard Castle, it was anything but. Lana, he knew, was enjoying all the attention though, and he loved watching her pose, gleaming and happy. It made him think about, well, actually, Kate, but that thought made him push his mind clear of her and smile big for the next reporter.

When they finally got down to her walking down the aisle, he let his eyes wash over the crowd taking in every face that he didn't know…and one he did.

He froze when he saw those green eyes staring back into his and it took Lana's touch to make him turn away. She had big, worried eyes, but he just smiled and said nothing.

All during, he kept trying to catch glimpses of her again, but even though his eyes sought hers, he never found them, only the dark brown ones of his wife.

Afterwards, he posed, and smiled, but Kate took up his whole being at this moment, his eyes faraway and unreaching. When Lana said it was time to go outside, he told her he'd meet her out there and all the reporters and strangers followed her out, wanting to talk to her. He smiled as he caught his last glimpse of her sauntering frame, then fell to his knees on the ground when everyone was gone.

Head in his hands, he felt like crying, thinking about those wonderful five years with Kate. All the laughter, and the kisses, and her free as she ever was. It had been so amazing that he still didn't know why he gave it up, or maybe he chose to forget why. Whatever the reason, he regretted leaving her every day, and yet, he was glad, because he met Lana, and now she was the love of his life.

Slowly, after what seemed like eternity, he stood and headed back down the aisle, ready to face the crowds, when a flutter of white caught his eye. He turned to find a small, folded up piece of paper on the seat Kate had been sitting in only minutes ago.

In a flash, he was picking up the paper and flipping open. There, in her elegant handwriting, it said,

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
but I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
that for me it isn't over.
Never mind
I'll find someone like you.

Nothing compares.
No worries or cares
regrets and mistakes
they are memories made.
Who would have known
how bittersweet this would taste?

I remember, you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
but sometimes it hurts instead."
And man, does it hurt.
But I want you to know, Rick, I am happy for you.
Lana is a lucky girl.
Have a wonderful life
and don't forget me.

Love
Kate Beckett

The tear that fell down his cheek traveled down his chin and onto his suit. A smile crept onto his lips and he reread it a couple more times before folding it up and placing it gingerly in his pocket.

No, he'd never forget her. He couldn't if he tried.