I own nothing of Harry Potter. I simply let my imagination run wild with the story. Of course it all goes to JK Rowling!!
It's been three years since I left the wizarding world. Don't get me wrong I miss it every second of every day. And as time passes I realize that I want more then anything to return, but it is not that simple. You see the wizarding world and I have a complicated history.
When I was eleven years old I got a letter from Hogwarts Witchcraft and Wizardry saying that I was a witch and invited to go learn magic there. I was so excited. But I do not know that there would be a lot of sacrifices. My sister and I had always been close but when I was accepted to Hogwarts and she wasn't it hurt our relationship. Instead of being close to her she suddenly pushed me away. I was the freak now instead of her sister. She felt like I abandoned her.
And to make matters worst for me there is a wizard named Voldemort whose life mission is to make the world hell it seems. He kills anyone, wizard, witch, muggle, and children. He kills anyone who stands in his way, like me. I stood in his way when he tried to attack Hogsmead, I stood and fought him and his followers. And not to brag I am a very gifted witch, I can do spells that qualified wizards and witches can't even do. Voldemort asked me to join him and I denied him. I am now one of his targets.
Voldemort attacked my family in my 5th year at Hogwarts, he killed my mother. My father and sister barely got out alive.
You could say that that would be enough to make anyone run away. But I assure you there is so much more to my life then that. You see when I went to Hogwarts I meet four amazing people. Amanda Smith, Remeus Lupin, Daniella Lovestool, and Sirius Black. They were all my best friends but mostly Sirius, Sirius became my bodyguard you could say no one got to me with out going through him. Not to mention he was absolutely gorgeous. But sadly if you befriend Sirius he comes with a side along friend, James Potter.
The second I meet James Potter I knew I loved him, though I would never admit it. He constantly asked me out and I constantly told him no. I finally admitted my feelings in my seventh year when I was force to live with James Potter in the Head Boy and Head Girls dormitory.
That whole relationship is the breaking point of my life. In one night my whole life changed…
Flash Back
"Oh Lily love!" James Potter cried.
"What James?" I asked kindly
"Well the boys and I were thinking that we would have guy's night out. Is that ok?"
"Ya I was thinking about having a girl's night. So I guess I will see ya later babe.
"Ok bye love." James said as he kissed me and walked out of the common room.
A girls night is just what my friends and I needed, We were all so busy with homework and out boyfriends that we have not seem each other that much lately. I went to my room and sent an owl to Amanda, Christy, Samantha, and Kandace to tell them all to meet me at the heads room to talk. With in ten minuets they were all there.
Amanda has the most beautiful eyes they are a bluish green which went perfectly with her ivory skin and brown hair. I have envied how she looked ever since first year. Amanda is the out spoken one out of our group. She is dating Remeus Lupin.
Christy has light hazel eyes with dark brown curly hair. Her curly hair seems to give her personality because she is so loud and funny, absolutely the life of the party where ever we go. Christy being one of the prettiest girl and popular girl at school is of course dating Sirius Black.
Samantha is the tom boy. She plays chaser for our house team. She has shoulder length wavy black hair and tanned skin. She is the athletic one of us and is dating Chad Legers who also is a chaser on our house team.
Kandace is the shy girl. She has pretty blonde hair that falls just past her shoulder. She is always the one to kind of remind us not to do stupid stuff. She is dating Jeff Dyers.
And then there is me, Lily Ann Evans. I am the party girl you could say. I have waist length red hair and shockingly emerald green eyes. I am the Head girl, top student and I am dating James Potter.
"Ok so this is what is up chica's James wants to have a guys night out which means that they will be spending the night eating as much food as the possibly can." I paused and looked around at the girls." So I figured since we don't see each other much anymore we should get dressed up and go dancing at the new club in Hogsmead?"
"Hell ya! Let's do it" Christy cried
"SO are we all in?" I asked
"Yea!" they chorused
"Ok so let's get ready!"
After what seemed like forever we were all ready to go. And let me tell ya we looked amazing. So after making sure we had our purses and cloaks on we walked out of the dormitory and made our way out of the school. (Seventh year students were allowed to leave to Hogsmead on the weekends as long as they were back by 2 a.m.) We were all so excited to dance but little did we know what was waiting for us.
When we got to the club we immediately threw off our cloaks and started dancing and I being the party girl I am was having a blast. But I could not help but notice a boy dancing with a blonde girl even though the club was dark and there was smoke every where they boy looked familiar.
"Hey Lils! Guess what Sirius is here!" Christy yelled at me as we danced.
"Really where did you see him at?"
"Over at the bar!"
"Ok is James with him?"
"No he said James was dancing."
The shock hit me as I turned around and looked at the boy who I thought was familiar. My heart dropped as I watch James grind to the music with the blonde girl. He was really into it and she was throwing her hands around his neck as he pulled her closer and started to kiss her.
"Christy!" I yelled
"What's wrong Lily?"
"Tell me please tell me that that is not James." I said pointing to the blonde girl
Christy moved around towards where I was standing looking very serious now.
"Please don't let that be him."
"That Bastard!" Christy said under her breath and looked up at me.
Tears were falling down my face. The only boy I have ever loved and trusted was cheating on me.
"Look Lily…" Christy started to say but I did not hear the rest because I had already ran out of the club and started back to the castle. I wanted no more then to put as much distance as possible from me and James.
My feet carried me to my dormitory with out me realizing it. I felt numb from head to toe. I could not believe what I just saw, James was everything to me. I mean I actually loved him. And there he was dancing and snogging a girl at a club like I did not exist. I feel to the couch crying my eyes out. I wanted to die
"Lily?" I heard Christy call from the door.
I looked up and started to sob if possible even more as I saw my four best friends standing there looking at me sadly.
"Hi."
"Look Lily I don't really know what to say except I am so sorry. "Christy said quietly
I did not say anything I stood up and looked at her softly and ran to her. She hugged me as I cried so hard. Amanda, Samantha and Kandace came and hugged me too. Each one of them whispering that it would be ok and he was a jerk anyways.
I stopped crying and stood up looking at the clock. It was 12 am which meant that in a half an hour James would have to be back to do his rounds. I looked up knowing in my heart what I had to do. I had to get revenge; I had to hurt him like he had just hurt me.
"Lily? What is it?" Amanda asked.
"I have to go find someone."
"Who?" Christy asked confused. "Listen Lily I think you should come back to Gryffindor tower for the night. I really don't think you need to see James right now."
"Oh no you are right; I don't need to see him right now. But he needs to see me, and you better believe me he will." I said whipping my face and turning top the mirror. I pointed my wand at my face where all my makeup had ran and smudged, instantly it was fixed.
"Lily what are you going to do?" Christy asked curiously.
"He hurt me so I will hurt him back. He will be back in about 20 minuets to do his rounds and I want him to find me. Not crying but in a class room or broom closet with another guy."
"Lily don't do anything you will regret." Amanda warned me.
"Ya Lily you are better then him." Kandace piped in.
"Look guys he hurt me. I just need to make him hurt back. Ya know like I always said don't fuck with me because I can fuck with you better."
"Ok Lily but after you come straight to our dorm got it?" Christy said.
"Ok promise!" I said as I ran out of the Heads dorm and collided with just who I was looking for. Daniel Rockerfello.
"Hey Lily!" Daniel said happily. He has always had a crush on me and to make things better he hated James. What can I say this was perfect.
"Hey how are you doing?"
"Fine are you ok Lily? You look like you have been crying?"
"Ya about that, could you help me with something?"
"Sure what's up?"
"Well you see me and my girls went out for a girls night out at the new club in town. Well when we got there James was there with another girl."
"That son of a bitch. Are you ok Lily?"
"No but I want to get even with him. Tonight. Well I was going to find you because well I know you hate James and I was going to ask if you would help me make him mad."
"Of course anything."
"Great!"
"What you need me to do?"
"Wanna find a class room or broom closet? James should be doing rounds soon and I want him to catch us."
"Ok lets do it!" He said enthusiastically.
This was easier than I thought as I grabbed his hand and lead him into a broom closet down the hall where I knew James would look. As soon as the door closed I started kissing Daniel with so much passion. Daniel responded by picking me up and setting me on the desk where my back was facing the door. James would recognize my red hair the instant he saw it. Daniel plunged his hand into my hair and seemed really into kissing me. This was too perfect and not to mention he was a pretty good kisser. After about ten minuets the door opened and a light coming from a wand flooded the room.
"Ok you two get out and back to your dorms before I…." James trailed off as he realized whose red hair he was seeing is.
We did not stop we just kept kissing.
"Lily?" James asked softly
I broke the kiss and looked at him and smirked. Revenge felt so good.
Daniel looked over my head and grinned at James.
"Hello Potter? Can I help you?" Daniel asked like there was nothing wrong.
"No thanks Rockerfello." James said his eyes full of hatred as he slammed the door.
I looked up at Daniel to see him smiling. He held out a hand for me and I took it as he gently helped me off the desk.
"Pleasure doing business with you Miss. Evans." He said as he bowed to me.
"Thank you so much Daniel." I said and gave him a hug.
"Any time Lily." He said as he took my hand and led me to the door.
"Well night Daniel."
"Night Lily."
I began to walk back to my dormitory to get some clothes to take with me to the Seventh Years girl's dormitory in the Gryffindor tower. As I entered I saw that James was not in the common room thank god. I grabbed some clothes and stuffed them into my bag. As I turned to leave something shinning on my stand, it was a picture frame that held a picture of me and James hugging. I looked down at it sadly and picked it up and threw it across my room.
When I entered the common room of Gryffindor house it seemed like everyone from 5th year up was still awake and having a party. I looked around and found Christy sitting next Sirius. When she saw me come in she got up and hugged me.
"I told Sirius." She said.
"Oh well my plan worked."
"What plan?" Sirius asked.
"I um made James walk in on me kissing someone." I said quickly staring at the ground afraid of Sirius anger.
"Oh."
"Oh what?'
"So that is why he is getting drunk off his ass."
"What you mean."
"Well about five minuets before you came in James came in looking livid. He saw me and came to me and said give me that bottle of fire whisky right now."
"Oh well he deserves all of this."
"Don't you think you should talk to him Lily?" Samantha asked.
"And why should I do that?"
"Because no matter what happened you love him. That is why you are hurting Lily." Kandace said lightly.
"Fine where is he?"
"He is down yonder drinking fire whiskey and complaining to Remeus. I should warn you Lily he is drunker than ever. He made and announcement to everyone."
"Merlin what did he say?"
"Well he said that for once in his life he has finally been cheated on." Samantha said.
I looked over at James who was next to a table which I assumed was the liquor table. He must have sensed my gaze because he looked at me and made a toasting gesture with his glass.
I looked over at Sirius who now had a bottle of Jim Beam.
"You better give that to me Sirius." I said as I took the bottle out of his hand and took a long drink.
"Fine!" Sirius said " I will just stay sober shall I? Every one keeps taking my bloody drinks!"
"Sorry but if I have to talk to him I need to be drunk."
James started walking towards our group, well not really walking he was more like stumbling.
"Hello everyone!" He said "Hello Padfoot old friend, Christy, Amanda, Remeus, Chad, Samantha, Jeff, and Kandace lovely to see you all. And ah who is this?" He said looking right at me.
"Oh yes hello hoe."
"What did you call me?"
"Um hoe! It means she who sleeps around."
"O ok James think what you want."
"Oh I will then! Sirius come let's play CJ!"
"Um James, it is called DJ, and Ya lets play." Sirius said as he walked over to a table and flicked his wand suddenly a stereo was there along with a micro phone.
"HEY GRYFFINDOR HOUSE! LISTEN UP WE ARE PLAYING DJ! OK SO YOU KNOW HOW IT GOES I SELECT ONE STUDENT TO START A SING MATCH. AND THAT PERSON WILL SELECT SOMEONE TO COMPETE AGAINST! WHO EVER YOU LIKE BETTER WINS! GOT IT? OK. GOOD NOW LET ME SEE WHO IS GOING FIRST? ALAS! JAMES POTTER YOU ARE UP BUD! WHO DO YOU CHALLENEGE?"
" Well Padfoot old friend I challenge…"
"I am going to bed" I said as I started to make way to the girl's staircases.
"I challenge, Evans!"
I turned around giving Potter the dirtiest look I could muster.
'OK LILS YOU ACCEPT OR NOT?" Sirius asked
"Ya I accept." I said as I walked over to the table dropping my bag along the way.
"OK WE HAVE A MATCH EVERYONE. OK SO HERE IT GOES JAMES WILL GO FIRST AND THEN LILY WILL RETALIATE."
"Ok Padfoot lets start already." James said
Sirius sat down the microphone and looked at James calmly.
"Please Prongs don't do anything you will regret."
"Listen Sirius she cheated on me." James said calmly as he could "I am only going to say true things about her."
"Ok"
Sirius took the microphone and walked back around the table.
"THE FIRST MATCH STARTS NOW! NOW REMEMBER LILY YOU CAN CHOOSE A DIFFERENT BEAT OR THE SAME. HERE WE GO JAMES POTTER EVREYONE!"
James stood there staring at me. The look in his eyes startled me, he looked angrier than I have ever seen him. After what seemed like forever he opened his mouth and started to sing…
Whoa oh oh
Ooh
hooh
No No No
See, I don't know why I liked you so
much
I gave you all, of my trust
I told you, I loved you, now
that's all down the drain
Ya put me through pain, I wanna let u
know how I feel
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit
now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those
kisses, they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want
you back
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the
presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they
didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
(At this point James conjured a memory that everyone could see. It was of me and Daniel kissing in the classroom. The whole room gasped and looked at me.)
You thought, you
could
Keep this shit from me, yeah
Ya burnt bitch, I heard the
story
Ya played me, ya even gave him love
Now ya askin for me
back
Ya just another act, look elsewhere
Cuz ya done with
me
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the
presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they
didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Fuck
what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as
well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck
you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh
oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Ya
questioned, did I care
You could ask anyone, I even said
Ya
were my great one
Now its, over, but I do admit I'm sad.
It
hurts real bad, I cant sweat that, cuz I loved a hoe
Fuck what
I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well
throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck
you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh
oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
Oh oh
Uh huh yeah
The whole room was quiet as James finished. They were staring at me in complete shock. And I for one was totally speechless. I could not believe what he just did. My eyes were stinging with tears, I turned to Christy and my other friends. Christy hugged me.
"Girly you don't have to do this, just walk away."
"OK WELL THAT WAS INTERESTING." Sirius announced. "OK SO LILY YOU READY OR WHAT?"
"Lily you don't have to do it" Christy said again
"No I do. Christy he don't know that I saw him."
"Oh!"
Sirius was looking at me as I talked to Christy. He leaned over and stared at James.
"Mate I don't think you should have done that." Sirius said.
"And why not? She deserved it."
"James you are so in for a surprise."
"What do you mean?" James asked.
"Hey Sirius! Give me the same beat!' I yelled to him.
"YOU GOT IT LILY! THE SECOND HALF BEGINS NOW!"
I stared at James as the music started. He looked a bit scared as I started to sing…
Oh oh
Oooh
No no
no
(You know there is two sides to every story) I said as I looked at the common room.
See I don't know why you cryin'
like a bitch
Talkin' shit like a snitch
Why you write a song
'bout me
If you really didn't care
You wouldn't wanna
share
Tellin' everybody just how you feel
Fuck what I did
was your fault somehow
Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit
out
Fuck all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo,
fuck you right back
Fuck what I did was your fault somehow
Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit out
Fuck all the
cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, fuck you right
back
You thought you could really make me moan
I had better
sex all alone (ha ha ha ha)
I had to turn to your friend
Now
you want me to come back
You must be smokin' crack
Im goin'
else where and thats a fact
Fuck all those nights I moaned
real loud
Fuck it, I faked it, aren't you proud
Fuck all those
nights you thought you broke my back
Well guess what yo, your sex
was wack
Fuck all those nights I moaned real loud
Fuck it,
I faked it, aren't you proud
Fuck all those nights you thought you
broke my back
Well guess what yo, your sex was wack
Whoa
whoa
Uh uh yea
Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea
Whoa whoa
Uh
uh yea
Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea
( I too conjured my memory of
James and the blonde girl dancing and kissing.)
You questioned did
I care
Maybe I would have if you woulda gone down there
Now
it's over
But I do admit i'm glad I didn't catch your crabs
I
can't sweat that cause I got to go
Fuck what I did was your
fault somehow
Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit out
Fuck
all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, fuck you
right back.
oh oh
uh uh yea
oh
oh
uh uh yea
oh oh
uh uh yea
oh oh
uh uh yea
You made me do this
I stopped and starred directly at James as the images of my memories faded. He looked pale and frightened. I grabbed my back pack and slung it over my shoulder pushing my way through the crowd of onlookers. Finally after what felt like forever I made it to the portrait hole and climbed out. I ran down the hall into the prefect's bathroom.
The pain hurt so bad all I wanted to do was die. I laid down on the cold floor thinking about my options. I felt like my life was over I lost James and he meant so much to me. What do I do now? I thought over and over again. There was a knock on the door but I ignored it.
"Lily?" Sirius voice said. It sounded muffled through the door.
"Please leave me alone."
"Lily open the door we need to talk to you."
"We? We who?"
"James and I."
"Tell him I hate him and want him to go away."
"Lily come on open the door ,baby. We need to talk." James said calmly.
"Don't call me baby! I said go away!" I yelled.
"Open the door right now Lily."
"NO!"
"Damnit Lily open this fricken door!" James yelled.
"Only Sirius can come in."
"Ok fine open the door."
I stood up and opened the door slightly so I could make sure only Sirius could get in. I saw sitting against the wall opposite the door. I gave him a cold look as I grabbed Sirius hand and pulled him in quickly. I locked the door quickly.
"Lily James is really sorry."
"Ya now that he knows that he got caught."
"Well ya but he feels like crap. He said that he don't know why he did what he did at the club. But he is sorry."
"Well sorry can't fix everything Sirius."
"I know Lily but could you please talk to him."
"Not right now Sirius. I just need time to think ok?"
"Ya ok Lily. I know you hurt really badly right now."
"Ya."
"But so you know I am always here for you."
"Thanks Sirius."
"And before you leave make sure you take him with you."
"You beat sweetie." Sirius said as he kissed my cheek and walked towards the door.
"Bye Sirius and thanks again for everything."
"Bye Lily." He said as he walked out of the door.
And that's when I decided that I had to leave. The pain that this world caused was unbearable now. I lost James and my family. I could not take it anymore. I had to leave.
I waited ten minuets to ensure that Sirius and James were both gone and then I walked out of the bathroom and headed to the Heads common room for the last time.
When I entered the common room I looked around. James was asleep on the couch. Obviously he was trying to stay up so he could catch me when I came back. I walked to my room and gathered everything I had and tossed it into my trunk. I then made the trunk weightless and shrunk it down so that it could fit in my pocket.
I wrote a note to James explaining everything to him.
Dear James,
I am leaving tonight. I can't stand this pain anymore. It is too much. I lost everything now my mom, my dad, Petunia and now you. I saw you tonight James, I saw you with that blonde girl. I don't know what I did so wrong to deserve the pain you put me through. That is why I made out with Daniel; I needed you to feel the pain you put me through. I hope it hurt badly, But so you know I love you. Merlin knows I love you. But I don't want to be put through this pain anymore. By the time you read this I won't be at Hogwarts anymore. Sorry to depart like this but its time to go. Have a nice life James.
Lily
I set the letter on the coffee table and walked out of the Heads common room. As I begun to walk along the corridors I started to cry knowing that I would never see this place again or anyone in it. It seemed like in no time at all I was down on the grounds heading towards the gate that lead to Hogsmead. I looked back one final time at the gate and saw the sun rising over the castle that had been my home for the past seven years. A single tear fell down my face as I pushed the gate open and stepped away from the grounds.
As I stood there and stared I saw a black haired boy running towards me holding on to a piece of parchment.
"Lily!" James screamed as he saw me.
"Lily please baby I am so so sorry! Please don't leave! Lily please!" He continued to scream as he ran faster and got closer.
"Lily!" I heard him scream one last time as I apparated away. Leaving a tear stained face James crying and screaming as if his world just ended.
END FLASHBACK
And that is what happened. I never even considered about going back until now.
I got a letter from my former headmaster who is the only person I have had contact with from my former life. He just requested I come to the Three Broom sticks in Hogsmead village. A girl with red hair was just attacked and sliced into her stomach with what appears to be a knife is two words or names rather
LILY EVANS.