*UPDATE*
PLEASE READ.
THIS IS 2013 EEVEEROSERUNNER.
THIS IS A OLD STORY. IT IS TERRIBLY WRITTEN. READ AT YOUR OWN EXPENSE.
PLEASE IGNORE ALL AUTHOR'S NOTES IN THIS STORY, EXCEPT THE LAST NOTE. TOTALLY DISREGARD ALL THE NOTES. THEY WILL BE DELETED WHEN I HAVE THE TIME.
THANK YOU.
April 16, 2011
Eevee: Disney does not own Ed, Edd, N' Eddy. She DOES own Sam, Elaine, and Aunt Rachel. …And Principal Woodall.
This is Not Chapter 1 or a Prologue So It Shall Be Named "Chapter 0": I'm Sooo Gonna Die
"Oh nonononono! Wake up, Ed! I can't…carry you…out of this…stinking window! You're too…huff…heavy!" I cried, desperately. BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! The scrap car flattening machine thingy came closer. The conveyor belt stopped abruptly as a car slid onto the target on the center. BAM! The gigantic white disk fell down onto the car. "Oh crud! Duuude?"
"I-I can't stop it!" Double D yelled. I'm surprised he hasn't fainted yet. I thought seeing one of his friends-and a new one, aka me- about to be killed would send him down faster than a crashing airplane. (That…made no f******* sense, Sam!) This would have never happened if the guys hadn't followed me back home. Now look; I'm about to die with a hypnotized doofus. I'm sooo hating my life right now.
"KEEP TRYING, MAN!" BAM! BAM! BAM! "Yo, shortstop! Where are the stupid cops, huh?" I shouted over the noise.
"Well, they didn't believe me at first, but they said they're-OH MY GOD! LOOK OUT!" Eddy cried. I whirled around. We were five feet away from being flattened like pancakes. Four feet away. Yup, this is the end. I'm gonna die young, and never experience a first kiss. BAM! BAM! BAM!
"Sam! NOOOOOOO!" Elaine shrieked.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, WAIT! I'm going too far into the story! Let me rewind a bit!
(Rewinds story)
"Will you sleep with me tonight, Sam?" Ed asked.
OMFG! I SAID REWIND, DARN IT! WE CAN'T GO THERE YET! START AT THE BEGINNING! START AT THE BEGINNING!
(Rewinds story even faster.)
Ok! Right here! Now this is where my story begins.