So you found out today your life's not the same
Not quite as perfect as it was yesterday but
When you were just getting in the groove
Now you're faced with something new
Oh, have you ever been so hurt, that you didn't think you'd ever recover? Have you ever been in so much pain, that you can't feel it anymore, and it all fades into your normal feelings? Have you ever hated someone, loathed them to the point of self damnation…and yet, loved them, with all your heart?
No…most people, had not the will, had not the desire to continue living threw all of that, day after day after day…not like anyone could blame them. After all, who would want to go threw all of that anyways?
No one should, and no one would. Sadly, people like Thirteen, had no choice in the matter.
She didn't get to say enough, no more…she didn't get to run away, and stay hidden from the world, and hide her pain from all the happy and false smiles she got. How could they pass her, each and every hour of the life she has wasted, and then, see her pain, plane as day, and still smile?
Didn't anyone care enough for her, to stop this from happening to her? Of course no one did…why would they? She was disgusting, horrid, putrid. Tainted even. Even she wouldn't save herself, if given the chance.
And I know it hurts and I know you feel torn
But you never gave up this easily before
So why do you choose today to give it all away
Thirteen silently maneuvered from dark place to dark place, long, lovely black hair pulled back…for once. Her eyes where a deep shade of red, crimson if you will, with small traces of navy blue swirling around in the depths of red. Her trench coat had been abandoned some time ago, and all that was left of her outfit was her skintight tanktop, black leather pants, and black lace up army boots. Her belts, too, had been discarded, along with many weapons and utilities.
Why?
Because she was going stealthy. The unlucky number was running, or hiding at least, from someone…and in hopes that her scattered possessions would throw off her sent in odd directions, Thirteen hid in the shadow of the night, moving further and further away from the annoyance that was trying to track her down.
See, by now, Thirteen was a expert when it came to loosing someone. She had been doing it all her life…running and hiding away when she did not wish to argue or fight. Some would call it cowardly…she called it not wasting her time. "Dammit…its cold." She muttered dully, rubbing her arms gently after a while. Normally, the cold or heat did not affect her…but it was just irritating now. Normally she had something else on over her arms, but not now. Clearly, she was a little more then frustrated by this point.
Well it's not so bad y'all
Together we all fall
Just as long we get up we'll stand tall
We shouldn't waste another day
Thinking 'bout the things that we forgot to say
Not only that, but she was running, just long enough to allow blood loss to take its toll. See, on each of her wrists, was a fine cut, made by the glass from her shattered mirror…thirteen knew she couldn't completely escape him, but, if she could do it for just long enough, then, she'd die, before he found her.
Yeah, Thirteen was a tad bit suicidal…but, then again, if you where her, you would be too. She had such a shitty life…no one could really blame her, for wanting to end it, before it got to far out of control.
"Damn this fucking human body. Damn this cold. Damn my worthless need to scatter my things around. Damn my inability to fight. And damn my inability to block out my God Damn emotions! Fuck!" She suddenly got flustered in her aggravation, fists clenching tightly as she glared at nothing particular.
Ha! So much for going stealthy.
I'm hittin' back y'all
Kickin' these four walls
Just as hard as I can til I can't crawl
I won't waste another day
With all these silly things
Swimmin' in my brain
Suddenly, without much warning, her eyes darted toward the sound of breathing, and she was roughly slammed against the wall behind her, one hand pressed against her stomach, and the other, pressed against her upper neck, the attacker's bloody arm pressed against her chin.
Thirteen, being a animal, pulled her lips back, and bared her teeth at him, a low, dangerous growl ringing out deep within her throat. The attacker chuckled a little, and then narrowed his chilling silver eyes, the look sending chills up, and down the girl's spine. "Tenain." She growled with such sheer passion, such deadly venom, that it would have left any normal man, in shambles. She growled a bit louder as he rubbed her stomach softly, his fingertips acting like feathers, lightly sliding underneath her shirt.
"Shhhhh…darling…" He whispered seductively, moving the hand that was at her neck, so that he was brushing the hair out of her face, her own, chilling blood red eyes swirling full of hate, loathing.
Tenain leaned in, as if to kiss her, and she growled louder, and then, snapped her teeth at him, barely missing him.
So your scars fade away
You soaked up the pain
A better person 'cause you lived through those days
And now you know what it's like to prove
You can overcome anything that gets to you
Annoyed, Tenain used the hand that had once been delicately pushing the hair out of her face, to violently slam her head against the wall behind her, causing her eyes to roll around a little in pain, and her growl to silence. Thirteen whimpered a little, but, then quickly brought her growling up again.
She hated Tenain, and even then, that was a dramatic understatement. Hate was not the only thing she felt for him, though. She had a part of him, lodged inside of her, forever haunting her, forever killing her slowly, painfully. He seemed to know this as well, because that hand on her stomach, was gentle, and loving. Yes, Thirteen was certain that he knew what he gave her…and he was pleased, proud of his work.
"Sariel…" He whispered, using the name, that he knew, would break her apart. And, of course, it did. The girl's eyes widened, and her growl stopped…a shameful expression taking over her hate filled one.
How dare he!
Thirteen winced at the name, and then narrowed her eyes again, forcing back a pained consumed look in glassy, tearful eyes. Curse hr inability to hold back such painful emotions! "Sariel." He whispered again, more forcefully this time. He heard her whimper again, and knew he had shattered her cold exterior. "…Why do you run?" He pulled away a little, only enough to allow her room to move, if she wanted to.
He knew she wouldn't try to run again, not now. Gently, he touched her wrists, smearing the blood up her arms. Thirteen shivered at the touch, her body acting against her will, acting in the way it had been trained to.
Well it's alright
We're sayin' our goodbyes
To the past and everything that ain't right
We won't waste another day
With all these silly things in our way
Tenain smirked at her shiver, and then licked the blood off each hand, earning even more shivers, accompanied by a truly disgusted look.
"Hn…" Thirteen winced at his touch, and her own uncontrollable response, and then bit her tongue hard, causing the blood to leak past her teeth, past her lips, and trickle like a river down her chin. Oh God, she hated herself for this, but, she let out a small sound, feeling his mouth, and tongue, travel along her neck, licking up the blood that leaked past her mouth.
Then, he smirked more, and without warning, he sunk his teeth into her neck, causing her to close her eyes tightly, and hold back another, defeated, sound. "Please… Tenain…stop…" she whispered in a broken voice, hearing him chuckle bitterly.
She knew he wasn't going to stop…but…she was hopeful…
I know we have given
All that we can give
When there's nothing to lean on
Well, I remember this
All we make of this lifetime
Is always here within
And remembering that's why
We should never give in
"Shhhhh…" Tenain whispered again, licking up the blood that he had made slither down her shoulder, due to the bite he gave her.
Oh God, what was wrong with her? Why was she reacting to his touch, to his hands that where violently pushing her to the brink of insanity? Why did she allow him to do this to her, why, why? It was because, in the mist of all the hate, all the sickening feelings…there was love, in his eyes, his touch…
Even if it was a sick, twisted, and corrupted love, it was still, love. At least, its what she thought was love.
"Tenain!" she gasped, feeling him pull her close to himself, almost possessively, as he pulled her up, to that she was in his arms. "Sariel…clam down…" he whispered, feeling her tremble. Almost instantly, she tried to clam herself, tears now streaming down her cheeks. The demon kissed her tear streaked cheeks, then rested his forehead against her own, holding her tightly.
Thirteen couldn't help but relax a little, seeing the look in his eyes. He was worried…very worried. "Please…Sariel…don't run from me." He breathed against her lips, narrowing his eyes sadly. "It hurts…I don't want you to leave me."
There's no giving up now
Do you really want to give this all away
Can't you ever see things in a different way
Somedays…
No giving up now
Such a beautiful thing to throw away
You should think things through
Over and over again
All over again
Tenain closed his eyes, and then breathed with her, just trying to relax, so that she would relax. Thirteen continued to allow tears to fall, even though her expression reflected nothing but a calm misdemeanor.
"Im sorry…I love you…Sariel…" he said, licking her lips tenderly.
And with that, she leaned into his touch, finally, just accepting that she would never get away. His touch, was toxin, addicting to her. How would she resist him? How could anyone? He knew just what to say, just what to do…it was very easy to get lost in him.
She's given up, completely, and utterly…and allowed him to kiss her, not even trying to fight against it. It was all useless anyways.
She felt so lost.
There's no giving up now!