Mercurial

Summary: Mickey finally realizes that there is something very wrong with Ian. This is what came to my mind when I read the episode description for 4x09: "Mickey tries to ballast a mercurial Ian."

Disclaimer: I don't own Shameless.

I'm sorry if I did not portray bipolar disorder very well. I tried to make Ian act a bit like Monica, but I also fear that I wrote his mood swings a little weird. I'm not quite sure. I tried to keep him in sort of a "manic" mood, until he crashes at the very end. I also wanted him to do the home remodeling projects thing just like Monica. Please let me know if you think I did alright portraying him and his illness or if there's something I need to fix.

It's really hard to keep someone in character that's supposed to be acting out of character so… any kind of feedback would be great.

The Gallaghers all sat around the kitchen table, eating their food and talking loudly. Fiona beamed at all of them, glad that they were all back home with her once again. It had been so long since they had all eaten dinner together at the same time, enveloped by the illusion of a happy family. For only a short while, it felt just like old times again.

However, in reality, things were beginning to change within their household, and they would never be the same.

One of the changes was the presence of a new person at the table: Mickey Milkovich. Fiona eyed him suspiciously. She never liked the Milkoviches, and she couldn't understand why they always seemed to hang around her house.

Mickey caught her staring. "Pass the potatoes," he said to her from across the table. She raised her eyebrows at him, waiting for a 'please,' but she never got one.

She sighed and just handed him the bowl.

"So Mickey…" she said. "Why are you here, anyway? You aren't hiding out 'cause you did any illegal activity I should know about, are you? I don't need you gettin' me in trouble with my probation officer." A few curious faces looked up from their food to hear Mickey's response.

"Relax," Mickey said, glancing at Ian and chewing on his lip. He looked back down and picked at his food. "It's nothing like that."

He didn't bother to answer her question. Ian looked disappointed by his response.

"Isn't your wife looking for you?" Fiona asked, beginning to get even more confused. Ian was the one who had invited him to stay over, but Fiona hadn't even known that the two boys were friends. She could tell that there was definitely something weird going on.

Mickey just shrugged. "Don't care," he responded gruffly. Lip looked at the Milkovich pointedly but said nothing. Debbie and Carl went back to eating their food, losing interest in the conversation.

Ian's mouth fell into a hard frown. It was nothing new for Mickey to completely avoid mentioning their relationship, but for some reason watching it happen once again made a fire burn in his stomach. He was suddenly so fucking sick and tired of Mickey never acknowledging what they meant to each other.

Mickey had kissed him in public recently… but they were still so far from being a real couple, weren't they?

"Y'know, Mick. That's a good question," he growled. "Why the fuck are you here?" His change in mood was so abrupt that everyone at the dinner table whipped around to gawk at him.

The redhead slammed his fork down on his plate and pushed out of his chair, rushing up the stairs.

"Ian?" Fiona asked, concerned. "What about the rest of your food?" she called after him.

"I'm not fuckin' hungry," he shouted back.

Mickey sighed and continued eating, ignoring the stares of everyone else. No one moved. Their happy evening had been ruined, and a hush fell over the table.

When Mickey was done eating, he silently brought Ian's plate with him to the sink and cleaned it along with his own.

"Thanks for the food," he muttered, before following Ian up the stairs.

Once he had left, everyone let out a sigh of relief and continued with their dinner.

Mickey knocked on Ian's bedroom door, but didn't bother to wait for a response. It was his room now too. He opened the door expecting to see Ian mad at him.

What he saw instead was even weirder.

The room was covered in crumpled up balls of paper. Ian sat on his bed, scribbling in his notebook furiously. There was a glint of excitement in his eyes.

"What are you doing?" Mickey asked warily. Ian looked up and grinned at him.

"There you are!" he said cheerfully. "Man, I am in the zone! I've been drawing up all these plans. I have so many ideas, I can barely write them down! You know that electrician guy I've been talking to? Once I apprentice with him I'll be able to rewire the whole kitchen! You know, this house has always had really shitty-"

"Ian. Jesus, calm down," Mickey said, looking him up and down uneasily. "Take a fucking breath."

Ian just laughed. "You're right," he said. "You're so right!" He leapt off of the bed and wrapped his arms around Mickey, burying his face into the crook of the older boy's neck. "I've got an idea that's even better."

"What's gotten into you?" Mickey asked as Ian starting biting and sucking on his skin. "Like a half hour ago you were shouting at me in front of everyone. Are you feeling okay?"

"Your skin is so fucking white. I love marking it up with bruises," Ian replied with a chuckle, almost like he hadn't even heard Mickey's questions. He sucked harder and slid his hand down to massage Mickey's crotch.

"Seriously, stop," Mickey said, fighting back a moan and shoving him away. He was too worried about Ian to pay attention to his ministrations at the moment. "You're freaking me out, man."

Ian looked at him with a wounded expression on his face. Tears formed in his eyes, but they didn't fall.

"You're pushing me away?" he asked in disbelief. "Again?!"

Mickey opened his mouth to respond but nothing came out. His eyes shone with guilt.

"Fine!" Ian shouted, scoffing at Mickey's typical silence. "Fuck you!" He threw himself back onto the bed and buried himself in the covers.

Once the first tear had fallen down his cheek, suddenly the redhead felt like he couldn't stop crying. Something had broken in him, and the dam that had been holding back all of his sadness had finally overflown.

He sobbed into his pillow. Mickey had never heard such a horrible sound.

The smaller boy stood there awkwardly, watching the crumpled up mess of blankets around Ian shake with every one of his sobs.

"… what is happening to you, Ian?" Mickey murmured, his voice breaking as he looked down at the boy he loved sadly.

"Fuck off," Ian grumbled back, curling further into the covers and using them as a shield against the other man.

That's when Mickey realized that the Gallagher's erratic behavior was more serious than he'd thought. It was more than just the drugs, and it was more than just the heartbreak that he'd caused before Ian left.

There was something was very wrong with Ian.

Mickey lay down in Ian's bed next to him. He didn't leave Ian's side for the rest of the night. After Ian had calmed down, and his tears had dried, he grabbed Mickey's hand tightly.

Neither one of them knew anything about Ian's illness yet, but they did know that whatever it was, they would get through it "together."