AU: 3rd FanFic. Hope you like it! I also apologize if I made Kiku to OOC. Sorry!
Disclaimer: Hetalia is not mine, but the Oc is mine though.
"For in all adversity of fortune the worst sort of misery is to have been happy."
-Boethius
The first time I saw him was under the huge Sakura tree. I remember it was a bright sunny day. The birds were chirping and the Sakura trees were in full bloom. I was walking around a nearby forest. I was on my way to my favorite spot and found him there. I couldn't help but be mesmerize by the beauty that seems to be played before me.
The way his long wavy silver-white hair would gently sway with the wind as the pure white Sakura petals danced around him. It was almost impossible to spot him there if it wasn't for his dark blue kimono.
The moment his pale blue eyes saw my dark ones, I knew that there was something about this person. Just his presence made my heart flutter like a butterfly, and I knew it was trouble. He started walking towards me and my face flushed when he gave me the most beautiful smile. "Aren't the Sakura trees beautiful today?"
I couldn't have agreed more.
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It has been couple of months since we first met, and in that short amount of time we were friends. I spent my time more with you than any of my other friends. Whenever I'm with them, I spent my time talking about you.
"So what's this brat's name?"
"Gin."
"Aren't you being too attached to him?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, you sound like you're in love with him."
That statement woke me up. It was like pouring cold water on my dream-state body. A cruel yet sweet realization, that made me want to see you more. Yet, at the same time, also the reason I had to stop seeing you.
Someone like me shouldn't love a mere mortal. It was a taboo. I hoped that you don't have these same feelings for me. These feelings that might end this relationship we had. Somewhere deep inside my heart, I was crying out for you to feel the same.
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We talked and met each other less frequently than before. I kept giving you these excuses. These lies I told to prevent my feelings from ever growing into what I fear. Even to the most precious person, the lies kept piling up. It hurts so much not to spend time with you. I couldn't help myself but cry at night.
"Why are you suffering so much for just a mere mortal?"
I suffered because I loved you. I loved you because you made me happy. These things I wanted to tell you. Tears were falling down my face as I gazed up the bright full moon. I wished you were here to take this pain away.
I closed my eyes and felt the breeze brushing my face, and arms wrapped around me. Surprised, I turned and saw your pale blue eyes staring deep into mine; with such intensity that I never felt before. The words that came out of your mouth were what surprised me the most.
"I love you, Kiku."
Love…At that moment, I felt my reasonings leave me. My fantasy turned to reality, the world where you and I waltz across the fields. I knew you felt my body trembled. I turned to you and looked you square in the eyes, and remembered the things my friends told me.
"You'd end up hurting yourself."
I looked away, and tried to struggle free from your warm embrace, but you wouldn't let me. I felt tears falling down my cheeks. Slowly falling…until your soft thumb caught them. You gently grabbed my chin, and forced me to look at you again in the eye.
"I know I'm a bother to you, Kiku. But I just love you so much. I know it wouldn't last that long but if you would, if you don't mind, would you fill my entire life with your presence?"
With those words, I couldn't help it. Tears were raining down my face, and my knees were shaking, that without you I would have fallen. I was so selfish. I was only thinking about myself. I was supposed to be the higher being between the two of us, and yet you seem to fit the role more than I do. With shaky breathe I finally whispered back,
"I love you, too so much."
And under the bright full moon, we shared our first kiss.
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The time we spent together as a lover was the best days of my life. Each morning waking up next to your warm body, and seeing your warm smile before anyone else can always had me in a good mood. It doesn't matter to me what others thought of us, as long as we were happy together.
Then not long after that, the Second World War happened. I remembered how you were against it. I had no choice, this was my responsibilities. I had to obey my boss's commands. I went up against my brothers and friends. Every night, when I'm at home, you held me in your arms as I cried. I'm a servant of god, my emperor.
We were winning against America, yet somehow they turned the tides. Now it was our turn to lose all the time. I was getting frustrated and frustrated, and you were there to listen. I was so glad you were always there by my side.
Then one day, America launched atomic bombs on our land. They said it was because we wouldn't surrender. It was so sudden. Everything turned white and before we knew it most of the things that were there were gone, but I wasn't paying any attention to that. I was looking for you.
I cried out your name. Frantically, looking around, until I spotted you under the Sakura tree, where we first met. You were all covered in blood and seem to be missing a limb, but all I cared about that time was to get you to help.
Once we reached the hospital, they started treat us fast. The doctor's didn't look good like we do, but they were doing their job as people. They worked on you as I told them to. I just wanted to make sure that you're alive.
I was so worried but I had to do my job as a nation, so I went to help treat my people. I was getting tired, my body's sore and my mind's all jumbled up. The last thing I remember before everything turned black was the peaceful sleeping face of a child.
When I woke up, I was in a bright white room. I looked around and saw flowers and get well cards on the table. I was wondering where you were, hoping you're safe. This feeling of hope and anxiety was like before we became lovers, except this was worst.
The door opened and my friends came in, and I asked them if they knew where you were. They gave me this sad smile, but I don't need they're pity. I just wanted to know where you were. I was worried for the worst and hoping, hoping to the higher beings put there, that you were fine.
"He's in the other room."
At those words I was so relieved. You were fine. It's not that time yet. Not yet. I wanted to see you right away but I had to wait the next day. I was so furious at this, but I was also tired. I went back to sleep and hopefully when I woke up, I could see you again.
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When I was on my way to your room, I was so excited. I would see you again. With that thought, I opened your door and was greeted with the most painful sight in my life.
You were there lying, with tubes hooked everywhere. You're body is so thin, and your hair thinned out. You look so small in the hospital bed with these things around you. I went to your bedside and tried to grab your right arm, but it was missing. Something inside me welted up and I knew there were tears threatening to fall down my face but I wouldn't allow it. I had to be strong. For your sake and mine.
Your eyes opened to reveal those pale blue eyes that I loved. You gave that sweet smile regardless of the oxygen mask on your face. I wrapped my arms around your neck and held you there for a long time. Just like this, I felt like I was at home.
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For a couple of weeks, unlike me, your health was getting worse. I heard of the symptoms and I was scared you might have them, too. Your skin had blotches on them and you're getting thinner and thinner. Even still, you still had that same bright attitude of yours that I loved.
My friends came and visited us. I spent my time entirely in your room with you. They left us gifts and get well soon cards, but we both knew what's going to happen. I was furious to accept the gifts, but you kept on telling me,
"Being angry does us nothing. It'll only lead to more destruction."
On the warm sunny day of April, where Sakura trees just bloomed and formed clouds on the earth with the last whisper of I love you from you. It was the day you left me in this world with a peaceful look on your face. All I could do was hold your hand, and cry and cry, until someone took you away from me.
Such an irony, instead of dying of old age, you died from a mistake I made.
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I was under the Great Sakura tree where we first met. Everything was a mess in there. The beautiful tree that once stood tall in there was but nothing but an ash. I walked around it, and something caught my eyes. I dug under the ground and found a small sprout of Sakura tree in there. I cleared the area and ran off for some water to water the sprout. I gently poured some in; and looked up into the sky, smiled and whispered,
"I'll see you under the Sakura tree."
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There you go! Please review and let me know if you like it or not.