Learn to Love Again
Summary: Loki has been in prison for three years until one day his family finds a way that he may be able to earn back his place among them. Willing to do anything he sets off for royal boarding school with his new adopted sister, Darcy. When a mysterious princess urges him to take a new view on his blood heritage will he earn back his place in Asgard or just find a new one in a kingdom where his negative qualities make the best kings in history.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author's Note: This is a little different than the stories I've read so far. I hope you like it. Please sign in if you plan to review.
Ch1. Four Years Freedom
It had been three years since the incident in New York City. Thor had become king and married the woman, Jane Foster, from Midgard. The Allfather and Frigga were living comfortably in the palace, their prior responsibilities now passed down to their eldest son and his wife. They still maintained an uneasy peace with the frost giants of Jotunheim. Their youngest son, Loki, remained in the Asgardian prison for his crimes. Still the retired king and queen longed for a way to release him safely.
Loki paced in his cell, having nothing else to do. Long ago the visits from sorcerers had ended, their purpose to strip the lies he had told himself from his mind and show him the truth. Once they had gotten him to stop putting the lies back, mainly by his mother expressing her dismay at his continuous resistance, they no longer showed up save for a monthly visit to search his mind. His mother still visited though. That was comforting.
They would spend hours catching up on recent events or reminiscing about the past or sometimes saying nothing at all, just him sitting or standing by and leaning against the bars so she could reach in and hold him. Sometimes he was quiet and others he cried till he fell asleep that way. Whenever they spoke though they always ended up having the same heartbreaking conversation.
"We still love you, you know," she would remind him.
"I know. Will you let me come home now," he would say in response.
She would give him an apologetic look and shake her head, "I'm sorry Loki. Your father and I do love you. You are our son and we your family. Nothing will ever change that but outside this cell we can't trust you."
His eyes would fill with tears and he would ask with uneven breath, "Why? I have done everything you have asked. What will it take for you to trust me again, at least enough for me to come home.
"There's nothing you can do sweetheart. You've lost that chance. I'm sorry. I can't help you," she would say woefully.
With his powers stripped from him he would then begin physically throwing things around his cell. His mother would leave once this started. She knew he only reacted in such anger when he felt betrayed and she couldn't bear to see him so hurt. As soon as she got back to her chambers she would lay down in her bed and weep. Odin would hold her in his arms if he was there but he gave no words of comfort as any he could think of would be lies due to his uncertainty of the future.
One day she decided to stay through her son's temper tantrum. With her back to the bars she held her hands over her ears and clenched her eyes shut until the now muffled sound of furniture flying about the small cell ended. When she turned around she beheld Loki crying in the fetal position where the bed had once been.
After the second incident the broken wooden furniture had been replaced with sturdier metal furniture. After the third incident they had tried bolting it to the floor but that had resulted in him severely injuring himself in the fourth incident. Frigga had then demanded that they remove the bolts and after that the guards would have to put everything back where it belonged once Loki was done throwing it.
As the guards rushed into the cell to put everything back she slipped in and went to her son. He did not protest when she pulled him into her arms. He welcomed her comfort and cried on her shoulder. It had been a long time since he had felt her comfort unobstructed by prison bars. From his lips came a single phrase, repeated with the same tone over and over as she rocked him so that she could not tell whether her youngest was even aware that he was saying it.
"I just want to go home," he said.
"Loki," she interrupted a little later before he could fall asleep, "Who are you most angry with now?"
He went still and ceased his chanting. Tears slid silently down his face. After a moment he finally answered, "Myself, Mother. It's all my fault."
She nodded her understanding and helped him to his bed, now situated on the other side of his cell. He settled down as she tucked him in like she had when he was a child. Her lips found his brow and then she sang until he had been sleeping soundly for some time.
After that night she no longer stayed outside his cell. Instead she had the guards let her in with him for their visits. Loki seemed to feel better at being allowed his mother's presence without the metal barrier between them. He was particularly delighted on the nights she would take dinner with him. He could almost accept this as the way his life would be. At least now he didn't always feel alone.
One night as they were finishing their dinner things changed. He had noticed a difference in her before when she had first arrived but he dared not ask why. She had seemed to exude a new sense of hope but it conflicted with newfound sorrow.
"Loki, how would you feel about getting away from this cell for a while," she finally asked.
He looked up astonished, "Against Father's wishes?"
"No, actually we would begin by going to speak to him and your brother as a family. First I need to know how open minded you're willing to be," she corrected.
"How long would I be out," he inquired.
"If you agree to our idea then you'd be released for at least four years with the potential to earn permanent freedom," she answered.
"Earn? How," he was confused.
"We would be giving you a chance to regain our trust. We wish to see what you do with the opportunities laid before you in a controlled environment," she explained.
"Controlled environment," he repeated, "So you wish to move me from one prison to another?"
"I'm not sure what it is. Jane seems to think it's some kind of right of passage. We'll explain it more fully before making a final decision and we won't make you go if you don't want to," she said hopefully.
"But you want me to go," he observed.
She nodded, "Yes, I want you to go and find a way to make us proud so that you can come home."
He thought for a moment and then nodded, "Whatever it is, I'll do it. I'll do anything to be allowed to come home."
She smiled sadly, "Alright, let's go."
He paused at her continued dismay, "What's wrong?"
"It's just that," she paused and took a deep breath, "Where you're going Loki, I won't be able to visit you like this."
He swallowed and nodded, "I understand."
He held his wrists out and she mournfully clamped the shackles around them. She hated putting chains on her son but by the remorseful look on his face she could tell that he knew that he had brought this on himself. At least she could take comfort knowing that he understood why he was being punished.
Loki was surprised when she led him to his father's bed chamber instead of the throne room. As soon as he saw his father resting in the center of the bed with a weary look on his face he understood. Father was preparing for the Odinsleep. The look on Thor's face glaring at him from Odin's bedside told him exactly what the new king thought of him. Thor had given up on gaining his brother back. That simple fact was more painful than being used as a ragdoll by the big green beast had been.
Then it occurred to him. Was Father's control over Thor the only reason the young king had not demanded an execution? If that was so and the Allfather was going into the Odinsleep they would have to remove him from Thor's reach or risk that Thor would have him executed before Odin could wake. He avoided Thor's gaze and swallowed back the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes.
Frigga bid him to sit on the other side of the bed between her and Odin. He complied and turned his attention to wonder at the presence of the two mortal women. One he knew to be the queen. Her presence he could think justified but her friend seemed entirely unnecessary.
"Alright. Everyone's here. Shall we begin," the queen stated calmly, giving Thor's hand a gentle squeeze.
"Let's have you and Darcy explain this opportunity to Loki, Jane. You understand how it works much better than the rest of us," Odin's voice was still strong but then again, even in his weakest moments, when was it not.
Jane nodded and looked at her brother-in-law, "Have you ever heard of a school Loki?"
"I believe I may have heard the word before on Midgard but I did not pause to learn it's meaning," he replied calmly.
"A school is a place where people go to learn alongside others who need or desire to learn the same or similar things," she explained.
"What am I to learn then," he inquired.
"We only expect you to take the classes the school will require you to take and you can choose whatever elective classes that interest you," she informed him.
He nodded, "When do I start?"
"Well that didn't take much," the woman he could only assume was Darcy commented.
He leaned towards her intently, "Understand this mortal, I will do anything to be allowed to come home to my family."
She raised a brow and gave him a half amused look, "Understand this asshole, I'm going to be at that school with you to report your behavior back to your family. In other words, you're stuck with me and trying to change that would destroy any chance of you coming home."
Loki was unsure how to respond to that for a moment until Jane abruptly stood up and walked around the bed towards him, "Oh, and while we are on the subject of your vast number of negative qualities," she said and his head flew to the side as her palm made a hard collision with his face. He felt his mother tense up beside him and reach out to comfort him as his father sat up looking mildly irritated and Thor and Darcy smiled insatisfaction, "That was for New York," she stated.
He chuckled after the shock wore off and looked at his brother with approval, "I like her."
Frigga crossed her arms and gave him a condescending look and Odin settled down, shaking his head. A silent moment passed before Darcy spoke, "Anyway," she drew the word out to match the awkwardness of the moment, "School starts in three weeks but we're free to move on campus tomorrow."
"Excellent," he smiled, "That will give me time to get used to my new surroundings."
"You're sure you wish to go so soon Loki," Frigga asked sadly.
He gave her a look of conflicting emotions, "I will miss you terribly Mother but I have spent three years in that cell. If one more night is all I have to endure then I will bear the pain of your absence as long as I must to be allowed home. I will find a way to make you proud Mother. That I vow," he then turned to Darcy, "I will be ready to leave first thing in the morning," He stood and began to walk towards the door. Frigga took that as a signal to return him to that wretched cell. He was quiet as they walked until they reached the prison, "Mother?"
"Yes Loki," she announced her attention.
"Would it be terribly selfish of me to ask that you stay with me tonight," he inquired.
She nodded, "Yes, but it would seem that I need your presence this night as much as you need mine."
They entered his cell and the guards locked them in after she handed them the shackles and laid down beneath the covers, cradling him in her arms as she had after his nightmares when he was a child. By her singing he soon fell asleep and she followed not long after.
Jareth stared out the window at his kingdom. Fires burned in the enemy camps, unhindered by the labyrinth's unmoving state. He longed for a way to end this war before passing down his throne. For eighteen years the Labyrinth had dropped it's defenses. For seventeen of them the goblin kingdom had been under attack. Now his heir was sixteen and in five years would be queen. The flames in one of the camps spiked, indicating their defeat at the princess' hand. He watched as the mighty blue dragon soared from the camp to the castle entrance below him. From it's spiked back dismounted the princess and she handed two small infants to the servants. How tender her heart was as she could not bear to harm these innocent children even though she was knee-deep in the blood of their kin. Tears stained her tan cheeks as she met her father's gaze. There was no glory in battle for her. Each life she took weighed heavily on her heart and mind. She did only what was necessary to protect her kingdom.
Suddenly he felt arms encircling his shoulders from behind as his wife pressed herself against his back, "Come to bed Jareth. You need your rest. The hour grows late."
"Do you think she'll be alright Rogun," he inquired.
"She'll be fine Jareth. Anna knows what must be done and she kills no more than needed," she settled her chin on his shoulder and followed his gaze to their child.
"Three years she has spent fighting the camps and has taken no time for suitors," he observed.
"Perhaps she will find one at school. She'll have four years to move on from the war," she calmly suggested and tugged him from the window.
He reluctantly followed, "If she doesn't choose one before graduation I shall choose for her."
"I thought we agreed not to force our child into an arranged marriage," she reprimanded
"That was before she came this close to forcing my hand," he replied, "She can not rule alone."
"Why not," she demanded, "You did."
"The kingdom always needs a king. That was the pact made by my ancestors with the labyrinth when the goblins first arrived," he explained for the millionth time.
"In case you haven't noticed, the labyrinth has not been holding up it's end of the bargain," she argued.
"I said it was a pact with the labyrinth, not God," he sighed growing weary of this argument.
"What's the damned difference," she growled.
"There is a world of difference Rogun. God has access and control over everything. The labyrinth does not. It can only direct and defend in it's own boundaries," he yelled.
She took a deep breath, "Does the labyrinth come from God?"
He looked to the side and paused, stopping to see through his daughter's bedroom door, "I do not know."
"Yet you do not question it," she crossed her arms.
"It does not ask anything to restrict faith and worship in God. What is left to question where question may further endanger my people," he continued watching as Anna knelt by her bed in prayer.
"I will fight you on this. She'll choose for herself," the queen insisted and continued her walk to the royal suite she and Jareth shared.
He watched a moment longer as she begged forgiveness for the lives she had taken and blessings for the orphans she had made. He knew her routine. She would pray in the languages of their ancestors to honor her bloodlines and then cry till she slept. He waited until she finished her prayers and went to her.
"Anna," he reached for her and she cried onto his shoulder, "Do you wish to sleep in our room tonight?"
She nodded and let him lead her to his suite. She settled herself between her parents and fell asleep as her mother sang a gentle lullaby from her homeland.
TBC…
AN: Let me know what you think.