Snippets from the villains mansion
The games room of the Villains Mansion, a quiet, drizzly afternoon. Given the nature of Villains the Games room is one of the largest in the mansion and is fitted with enough amenities to distract even the most determined Villain from any bored 'why-not-destroy-the-world' plotting. Mickey has ensured that his Villains are provided with (amongst other things) a billiards and pool table, an always fully-stocked bar, card tables, couches, large screen tvs and a variety of games consoles and games from every era (except Kingdom Hearts. In fact, don't even mention Kingdom Hearts...stuff was set on fire last time...).
Today the Games room was half-full with villains entertaining themselves this rainy afternoon.
Jafar entered the room and paused just beyond the doorway, observing the occupants. He turned his staff several times in his hand and - frowning- strokes his beard, before speaking:
"Who's missing?"
Hook looked up from the bar "Huh? Is there a meeting? Should we all be here?"
"No..." Jafar answers, eyes narrowed "It's just...quiet...unusually quiet..."
And then the heavy front doors to the mansion slamed, echoing throughout the dark halls and reaching the company gathered in the living room. They looked up, listening and still. Then footsteps came, quick and light, marching towards the villains, louder and louder as they stare towards the door (Facilier taking advantage of the distraction to nudge the cue ball forward a few inches).
The steps ring out, their owner moving faster now, almost at run, the whole room is attentive now, all meerkats staring in rapt anticipation, as the dark doorway is violently breached by a figure in white-
"Oh very funny! Ha ha ha! Soooo clever!"
The soaking wet young man, pale with vibrant red hair that was now ruffled and red cheeks that burned stood fuming in the doorway, huffing and puffing. The room's anxious mood collapsed into helpless snorts and giggles. The exasperated young man stared furiously and turned to the nearest occupant, Jafar, who raised his eyebrows and examined the head of his staff intently. He was trying very hard not to laugh.
"'A Left-handed hammer'? Really?!"
Facilier collapsed over the pool table, Cruella cackled and threw her head so far back the chair almost tipped, Hook disappeared behind the bar with a 'HAH!' and a thump and Jafar surrendered to a brief lop-sided smirk as the laughter exploded in the room.
"The Tartan paint? The new fallopian tubes?! Telling me I had to feed the Gargoyles? Freezing all of my belongings in ice?!
The Evil Queen air high-fived Dr. Facilier who was splayed like a star fish over the table, cackling madly. Clayton was guffawing and clinging to the pool cue, game abandoned while Oogie Boogie bent double, laughing loudly, bugs dripping to the carpet. The young man stared at the hilarity surrounding him, gradually hyperventilating and rapidly approaching breaking point.
"I – I mean when will this end? Huh? When will this hazing end?! I mean it's not fair! I haven't got any powers! Maleficent has killed me at least once a week since I got here, since I - I found out about an entire universe full of – of Gods and Magicians and animals that talk! I didn't ask for any of this! I never wanted to be a villain! So I'm ambitious! So I broke a girl's heart! You maniacs have killed children! I'm not like all of you! I never want to be anything like you, you – sickos! I've been treated like dirt every day since I was thrown into this nightmare world, surrounded by all this, all this – Mickey Mouse SHIT!"
He had screamed the last three words to the ceiling, uncaring and uncared for, gripping his wet hair in his fists he squatted down to the ground, sobbing dryly. His audience was silent and sober (except for Hook) including the small group that had gathered at the door behind him, drawn to the sounds of cruel amusement. The dust settled and with it an uncomfortable silence.
Hans wanted out. He pushed the heels of his hands into his eyelids and wished so hard that he was back in his Kingdom - he even missed his brothers. No, rather he wished his brothers were here instead of him. He would even take Arendelle over this! These people were insane! There were talking animals and the weather depended on that demon woman's moods. The months he had spent trapped here were an eternity. He couldn't take this treatment, this punishment any longer - was this because of what he did to Anna? He would apologise, he would, only let him out of here. He wasn't a bad guy, he wasn't a Villain.
...he broke a girls heart, tried to have her sister killed and conspired to steal a nation, but that was politics – not personal.
He became aware of the intruding silence and slowly raised his bedraggled head. He had always thought himself a brave man, but at that moment, staring up at the mismatched crowd around him he was close to begging them to send him home, to prison or anonymity. He heard an awkward cough and all heads turned to the nightmare bag-shaped creature with empty eyes that dripped bugs. When he saw he held the attention of the room he reached up to the chalk score-board on the wall behind the billiard table and pulled down a complex chart with multiple coloured lines.
"Oh-Kay Kids! 32 days! Who had 32 days?!" He hollered and pointed to the board with a pool cue, like stall at a fairground.
The crowd of Villains surged forward to the board leaving the damp bewildered Prince behind.
"Headless Horseman! It's the Horseman for the win! Where are ya, buddy?" The crowd by the card table parted to reveal the Headless Horseman punch the air then fist-pump his way to Oogie Boogie to a chorus of polite applause, boos and cries of 'cheat!' from Facilier. Hans watched him collect what looked like a large pile of money and high five the villains around him while Gaston yelled 'Speech!' and was shushed by others.
32 days. Since he arrived.
A bet. They'd made a bet on breaking him. They truly were Villains.
He stood up, unnoticed, and staggered from the room, heading to the bedrooms upstairs and leaving behind him the sight of a Headless man doing shots of vodka, cheered on by a chanting crowd.
Awww...poor Hans...
Not really, he's a dick.
But it can't be easy being the Villain's new bitch, especially since he took over from Mor-du who had no sense of humour and never got the take-out order right.
But he gets a brief respite, for now; no doubt we'll come across him again in the Mansion, probably hiding in a cupboard.
Hope you enjoy, any comments or spelling mistakes feel free to review or flame, likewise if you want to see a certain villain, no guarantees but it'll be fun to try and sneak them in.
Ciao!