AN:/ Hey all! Just a Harry Potter story. I Love J/L stories and could resist making my own. Or even just attempting to.

I made this with the facts that we know from Lily's last year to make this story. Snape doesn't have a role. James does 'cause I feel like a story isn't complete without him. Lily OBVISOUSLY has a role. Harry is NOT mentioned… AT ALL.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me. Nor do the characters. The almighty JK Rowling created these. I just play with them and make them do and say stuff. Merely for entertainment's sake. Enjoy!

I don't actually think It's that good. Just you know. Testing the water with my writing. No work tonight and I wanted to do something creative. Now to cranky Lily and Sexy James. (I love him!)

Megg xoxxoxoxoxoxoxoo

Lily wasn't happy.

She stomped past the Great Hall. Carols. Stupid Carols. Why? Why was everyone so happy?

She broke into a sprint, rushing past the merry students yelling "Happy Christmas!" at the tops of their lungs.

SHUT IT!

She wanted to scream. She didn't need any more reminders of the holiday.

FINALLY! She thought as she reached the head dorm she shared with James. Lily knew that chances were James was still out with his lads. And she was glad too. She couldn't handle him at the moment.

She tried so hard to resist him. He was so tempting at times but she knew that it was better if they were friends. Regardless, not even James would help cheer her up right now.

James still didn't know why she had been absent from school for a few weeks back in August, and she preferred it that way. It was easier. She didn't want pitying looks.

Slamming the door Lily finally broke. Her back pressed against the door she sunk slowly to the floor. Her legs bent at the knees. She let out a big sob.

'This holiday would be forever tainted from now on' she thought.

Tears streaming down her face, sniffling Lily remembered her year so. A horrible one by her standards. The New Year would hopefully shed some light for her.

Trying to distract herself from the pain this holiday brought, she remembered the day. Her foolish mistake this morning at breakfast. She knew she should have gone to the kitchens and skipped it but she couldn't help herself.

Her best mate Marlene knew something was up this morning when her best mate wasn't interested in opening her presents. Instead she suddenly had tears in her eyes and left to go to the library.

James wouldn't meet anyone's eye. Marlene blamed him. So she (Marly) had followed Lily out of the Great Hall.

"Lils! Wait up!" she yelled after Lily.

"What did Potter do?" She questioned.

"Nothing!" Lily had replied, shocked. Marly was always trying to set the two up. What had caused her change of heart?

"Potter? He wouldn't talk to anyone after you left, I assumed he did something this morn'.

So did he?"

"Did he what?"

"You know. Do something Saint Lily didn't like?" Lily knew Marly was joking but tempers were flying today.

"I AM NOT A SAINT! Leave me ALONE okay? I want to be ALONE!" She yelled. In the middle of the library.

"Uh, um okay... sorry then. I'll just… yeah. Uh I'll go. S'later Lil." Marly said, backing away. Lily defiantly had tears in her eyes now.

Regardless for the holiday, Lily got to work. In two weeks time there was a transfig test. Lily refused to fail; She did have to make it into the Auror program after all.

Also in another week there was that Charms test. Lily's best subject.

Lets not forget the Potions practical exam in four weeks time. No matter how much Slughorn loved Lily, he would not stand if Lily failed that one.

So much studying to be done. So little time, thought Lily.

She ignored the startled looks of those few people that were fortunate enough to see the head girl break. On Christmas. In the library. Lily found a desk and got to work.

Even Madame Pince was too shocked to come round screeching in French.

"Get back to work." She snapped at those watching her. She came to study. Not be studied.

After several hours of studying Lily's stomach made it's self-known. Lily groaned. She didn't want to face Marly right now.

A quick trip to the kitchens was all she would need right? Off she went. Down to the little portrait that was overlooked by so many who were in search of food, a fruit bowl with a very ticklish pear laid innocently on the wall.

"Ms. Evans!" cried Tabby, one of many Hogwarts house elves. "Sit! Sit!" she said, pulling Lily toward a little table with a chair.

"What would Ms. Evans like to eat today? A treat for Christmas day perhaps?" Tabby asked.

"Just a sandwich thankyou Tabby. I won't be able to stay long. I'm expected." She replied.

"Oh! Mr Potter's picnic lunch? Oh Mr Potter told me there was enough for everyone there! Does Mr Potter need more?" Asked Tabby. Fear shinning in her big bright blue eyes.

"Uh, not that I am aware of. I'm sure James has enough." Said Lily. James hadn't told her of any lunch. And they were on good terms too. Perhaps he didn't care for her as much as he claimed he did.

"But Mr Potter said he was looking for you. He said his next stop was the library. He was going to get you so you could join in!" Cried Yoully, another elf.

"He promised!" the young elf said.

"I always make good on my promises Yoully." Said a familiar voice belonging to none other than a Mr James Potter.

"Lily? There you are, I've been looking all over the castle for you. I thought you were in the library so I went there first, Marlene told me you were there. But you weren't. I had to ask a first year if he had seen you. He told me you were grumbling about having to go to the kitchens. Everyone is having lunch together in the commons up in Gryffindor tower. You coming?" James asked Lily. His eyes shone with concern and if Lily wasn't mistaken, affection.

Aw he did care. Too bad Lily didn't want company today.

"Sorry James, too busy. Got a lot of studying to do for those tests coming up. Just having a tiny break to silence my stomach. Maybe later." She replied curtly. Nothing was going to make her go.

James' shoulders slumped.

Disappointed he said "Fine. Study then. Need I remind you that it is holidays, and it is Christmas? At least have a little cheer."

"There is no need to remind me of the date Potter. I do not want to attend your silly picnic. Understand? I want to be alone. I want to study." I also want to cry Thought Lily.

James' eyes shone with fury. It's only a picnic thought Lily nothing to get upset over.

"I was trying to be polite. Apparently your bad mood is my entire fault and I haven't the faintest idea WHY. I didn't even speak to you this morning and I get blamed for your bad day. I invite you to lunch and you make it sound like I asked you to skip your precious tests. WHY? Why Evans, is it so hard to believe that I would do something to benefit you? He asked her.

"Maybe because you spent the first five years here tormenting me? Maybe it's because I'd rather be alone right now. Maybe it's because I do not want to be talking to you. Not right now, in fact, I don't want to talk to anyone today. Leave me the hell alone Potter. Or you may just find you made a HUGE mistake crossing me today." Cried Lily.

She stormed out of the kitchens. Appetite forgotten. All she felt like doing was studying, and well crying.

She ran back to the library and got back to her studies. After another couple of hours she was hungry again. So she left the library. No more studying could be done today; the library was closing early for the feast.

Just as she left her sanctuary she overheard her so called mate Marly talking about her.

"I just don't get it. If there is something wrong why can't she just tell me?" Whinged Marly.

"I don't know. You know I always knew you were too nice to be friends with her. Just let her be a loner. She deserves it. No one should be so mean." Said Amelia Taylor, a Ravenclaw who had once proclaimed to everyone that James was hers and that she knew some particularly painful charms if anyone got in her way.

Obviously someone knew of James and Lily's relationship being on good (ish) terms.

"I guess. But…" Lily didn't want to hear anymore.

She turned, running for the other staircase that would get her where she needed to go.

Tears dancing in her eyes she dashed toward her dorm.

It was getting late. Nearly time for dinner. People were yelling "Happy Christmas!" at the tops of her lungs. Lily couldn't handle it.

She ran past the Great hall, away from all the happy people and into the dorm she shared with James. Thinking he would still be out with his lads.

Slamming the door behind her she sank to the ground. Legs bent at the knees and started to sob.

Lily's memories had come full circle. No time to keep avoiding dealing with the situation at hand.

She didn't even notice him standing there. Watching her as she sobbed uncontrollably.

He sank down next to her and put his arm around her. She jumped, startled.

"Shhhhh it's alright. I'm here." James whispered.

Lily's sobs grew louder. She clung to James' shirt as he held her close.

He lifted her up and carried her into his room. Lily's door had a password locking charm on it and James didn't know the password.

He sat on the bed with Lily in his lap and he tried to calm her down. Eventually her sobs quietened to small whimpers and her breaths grew larger. She rested her head against his chest. His shirt was stained with tears. He rubbed a hand up and down her back calmingly. Lily couldn't remember ever feeling so warm, comfortable and loved in her life.

He hooked a finger under her chin and lifted her face to look at his. His eyes were warm milk chocolate; up close they had small green flecks in them. His black hair was a mess as always and his face shone with concern.

"You okay?" He asked quietly. His voice breaking the quiet of the room.

Lily's eyes filled with tears again.

"No. Not even in the slightest." She replied.

He nodded and drew he in closer as his rested his head on the headboard.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asked her. Hs eyes peering at her through the bottom of his glasses.

"I don't particularly want to but I will anyway." She said.

He just looked at her. "Before you start, I want you to know that. You are amazing. You know that right? 'Cause you are the only one who, after yelling at me for no reason, managed to make me feel sorry." He kissed the top of her head and kept her close. Her face tinged red and she looked down.

After a few moments she began.

"Last year my older sister Petunia married her boyfriend Vernon Dursley. He's a pig. I can't stand him. Neither could my mum or dad. We would always joke together that there would never be left over's after a family diner again. "

She paused. James continued to hold her close and rub his hands soothingly up and down her back.

"You might remember that I was away in August this year." Said Lily.

James looked at her, slightly surprised wondering how this could relate to her mood today.

"Yep I remember. I had to do patrols by myself. The prefects were in a state because you weren't there and no one knew why." He told her.

"Yes. Well. My parents. They were… killed. In a car accident. A collision. Completely out of the blue. They were on the way to visit my sister and her husband. I went home for the funeral and to make sure everything was in order. My sister refused to let me into their home and I couldn't bear to stay in my parent's house so I booked a room in the Leaky Caldron and make the trip back and forth everyday." Lily told him.

James was shocked. Lily's eyes were streaming with tears by this point so he shh'd her and hugged her tight to his body. Her body shook with her tears but she kept going.

"Just before they sent the form for returning home this holiday I received a message from my sister informing me that I was not going to be invited to their place for Christmas and could not return home because the property belonged to her until I become an adult." Lily let out.

With the last statement came a sea of sobs and James held her, comforting her through it all. He was truly amazed that she had kept this in for so long.

Lily's sobs kept getting louder and more heart breaking with every minuet. James lightly kissed her forehead and her hair. Showering her with the love and affection she deserved.

"Before I turned eleven, Pet and I had the very best relationship sisters could have. We did everything together. And then I got the letter. She became withdrawn. Secretive. Then I left for the school year and came home to a snooty Petunia who didn't want to know her little sister anymore. We are only three years apart yet she acts like she is SO much more wiser and. She hates me. I know it. Her husband hates me too. And so does Marly now. And you probably do too and I can't handle the fact that my mum and dad won't ever get to be at my wedding one day or meet my children or the man of my dreams or even get to celebrate my graduation with me. Pet got to have it all and she is so convinced that I got the better deal. That our parents loved me more because I was "Special". I hate it. I want to have that good relationship with my sister again. I want my children to love their aunt and know her as the woman I did before I left for Hogwarts."

"I could never hate you Lil." James said quietly after Lily had finished. "Never."

Lily looked up into his eyes. "I believe you." She whispered.

He lowed his head closer to hers and rested his forehead against hers.

Her eyes fluttered close. He dipped his head in and kissed her eyelids, then her cheeks, and her nose and finally he brushed his lips against hers. They both sighed.

Eyes closed and heads touching they sat together. She opened her eyes and whispered "Merry Christmas James." And kissed him on his jaw.

"Merry Christmas Lil, I love you" He replied before claiming her lips with his own. They kissed slowly always making sure the other was comfortable.

Lily broke their kiss and leaned her head on his shoulder. "Thankyou" she told him.

"For what?" He asked, still dazed that he had finally gotten to snog Lily Evans.

"For not giving up on me." She replied.

She snogged him once more before they claimed out of his bed and turned to the kitchens to eat.

One year later James snogged his girlfriend one last time before sinking down onto one knee. He looked up at her, his charming smile on his face.

"Lily. I promise to love and protect you till the day I die. Will you marry me?"

"Yes!" said she before yanking him and a snogging the daylights out of him.

Lily was happy.