Charlotte
ran through the doors and threw her bag down on the desk with a heavy
splatter. It was a busy day in the ED and she had been called in to
replace a worried Steve, who was looking after an 'ill' Claire
who had given no reasons to her absence today. Minds instantly jumped
to the worst in thinking he
had returned for Claire. He,
who's name deserved no mention. He,
who treated her like a rag doll. Nobody questioned Claire, and
Charlotte jumped to her defence in covering for Steve
today.
"BEAUMONT! In 'ere!" Frank's voice was unmistakable
as it rumbled from one of the Resus cubicles around the corner.
Charlotte knew her things had fallen from her bag, but ignored them
in panic, running to Frank's side, unaware of what would greet her
just around the corner. She didn't particularly enjoy treating
Resus patients, preferring the random passer-bys that dropped through
the waiting room, needing the assurance that their issue or problem
was nothing to worry about. She liked it simple, with a sprinkle of
challenge.
As she emerged through the curtain, a male aged in his
30's was unconscious on the stretcher, blood pouring from his
abdomen. One word raced through her mind; Shit.
Pulling her torch from her pocket, she immediately raced to the man's
head to check the status of his pupils.
"What have we got?"
She asked, flashing the light side to side through the patient's
rolling eyes.
"Not here, Beaumont. There's a girl next door
who needs seeing. Get going. We've got it covered in here."
Charlotte held her torch, staring blankly at Frank's busy figure
racing around the cubicle managing things. Typical of him. Charlotte
smiled to herself and left, almost skipping along on her merry
way.
Charlotte, realizing she was not demanded to be in a
hurry, returned to place her things back in her bag. On cleaning up,
Gabby approached the office door.
"You're covering Steve
today?" She asked. Charlotte knew from her tone that the job lined
up with the young girl was serious.
"Yep." She nodded,
returning the last of her things to her bag. A broken perfume bottle
lay scattered on the floor. "Shit." Charlotte muttered.
"Leave
it, I'll have the cleaners on to it. There's a young girl who
needs looking over from you. If you ask me, something's up."
Gabby suggested, glancing to a cubicle down the corridor. Charlotte
stood up and walked with Gabby.
"What's the story?"
Charlotte refastened her stethoscope around her neck, hanging on to
the end of it as she walked. They approached the young girl in the
bed.
"This is Hannah." Gabrielle introduced the young girl to
Charlotte.
"Hi, Hannah. I'm Dr. Beaumont." Charlotte quickly
stroked the young girl's hand.
"Hannah fainted at school. They
called the ambulance, on arrival she had a GCS of 15." Looking at
Hannah, now, Gabby continued. "Dr. Beaumont will sort you out,
Hannah." Then, turning her attention back to Charlotte, she smiled
in a way to ensure Hannah would not become suspicious of anything.
"Can I have a word, doctor?"
"Be back in a tic." Charlotte
smiled down at Hannah, and wondered out, sealing the gap between the
curtains.
"A teacher told the paramedics Hannah hadn't eaten
since yesterday morning... Might want to consider that..." And with
that, Gabby left the girl's file in Charlotte's waiting hands.
Charlotte knew this would be a tricky patient to crack. Composing
herself, she walked back in, closing the curtains behind her.
"Okay,
Hannah. Can you recall what happened today?" Charlotte sat down on
the end of the bed, holding her free hand across Hannah's feet.
This was an unconscious decision. But that's how Charlotte
performed with her patients. Caring and affectionate in a subtle
way.
"Um. I passed out in class. That's really all I know."
Hannah bit her bottom lip and smiled through it.
"Alrighty."
Standing up, she continued. "Are you tired often? Do you sleep
alot?" Charlotte began with the simple questions. Hannah nodded in
a serious matter. "Do you mind if I listen to your stomach,
sweetheart?" Charlotte asked again, as she tugged her stethoscope
off her shoulders. Hannah looked shocked, then left out a light
giggle.
"My stomach? Isn't that thing for listening to hearts
with?" Charlotte smiled.
"You'd be surprised what you can
hear with this little tool." Charlotte placed the stethoscope on
Hannah's stomach. Hannah seemed a little squirmish.
"So, um,
what do you hear?" Hannah tried to interrupt, sitting upwards
unexpectedly.
"I hear a very hungry tummy, darl. When did you
last eat?" Charlotte acted unaware to Gabby's earlier
statement.
"Um, Lunchtime." Charlotte picked up Hannah's
refusal to look at her. Charlotte walked closer, placing her hand on
Hannah's and wrapping it around her palm.
"Are you sure?"
Charlotte smiled in a suggestive way. Hannah didn't answer, but bit
heavily on her lower lip again.
"Um, when can I go home?"
Hannah asked impatiently. Charlotte spoke calmly.
"When I find
out what caused this fainting spell today. Are you sure you ate at
lunch...?"
"Yeah. I think so..." Hannah seemed confused.
Charlotte knew the situation already. Another classic case of young
girls aspiring to look like their 'role models' in
magazines.
"Well, how about I tell you what I think? Hmm?"
Charlotte seemed comforting in such a way that Hannah couldn't say
no to Dr. Beaumont's suggestion on what most likely occurred
today.
"When you take in food, it contains all kinds of
nutrients, vitamins, minerals, heaps of goodies that your body needs
to function properly. Each little essential has a certain role it
plays in your body, so it's important you try and get as much of
them as possible. So when you go longer than usual without food, your
body has a lot of trouble carrying on its daily tasks. And I believe
this is what happened to you today, sweetheart. You resisted food for
so long, you brain said, 'I can't work properly, I'm not
getting the goodies I need to work properly' and your brain has
reacted to the situation by causing this fainting episode." On
discussing the part of the brain, Charlotte pointed to her own head
to get the message through more strongly and to keep Hannah's
interest up.
"Do you think that sounds about right, darl?"
Charlotte patted Hannah's hand. Suddenly, Charlotte had not seen it
coming, but a tear rolled from Hannah's eye and slipped down her
cheek. Hannah tried to swipe it away, but it fell before she could
reach it. Charlotte idled herself further up the bed. She was equal
to Hannah's chest now, and in arm's reach of Hannah's forehead.
Charlotte took advantage of that and swung her arm up and stroked
Hannah at the hairline, comforting her as the tears fell heavier from
her eyes.
"What's going on, Hannah? Talk to me, sweetheart. I
want to help you, that's why I'm a doctor, so I can help people
when they're sick. But you need to tell me what's going on,
darl."
"I just want to be pretty and skinny! It's not too
much to ask!" Hannah became frustrated. Not at Charlotte, just at
her own obvious several failed attempts.
"Sometimes, it can be
too much to ask. Especially if you are causing yourself physical
problems because of your severe attempts, sweetheart." Charlotte
had not stopped stroking Hannah's hairline. Hannah was now sitting
up, her legs crossed under the blanket, still allowing Charlotte some
room on her bed to share. Although she was frightened Charlotte had
picked up on her eating patterns, she still wanted Charlotte to stay
and talk to her. There was something about Dr. Beaumont's aura.
Something that Hannah didn't want to part with at a time like this.
Now that she was sitting up and at head level with Charlotte, she
dropped her head towards the doctor and Charlotte pulled her in
gently for a comforting hug. Wrapping her arm around Hannah's head
and Hannah's hands tightly enclosed in her other hand, Gabby walked
in. She assessed the situation quickly, and jumped straight to the
point.
"Hannah's mum is here." Gabby nodded suggestively
towards the young patient, who suddenly whipped her head from
Charlotte's protective enclosure. Charlotte was surprised.
"No!
No! I don't want to see her!" Hannah was suddenly frightened.
Charlotte quickly attempted to relax her patient and calm her down,
to no avail.
"Sweetheart. It's really important mum is aware
of this. She can help you find a counsellor you trust and can talk to
about this. It's very important." Charlotte began to worry, as
Hannah didn't calm down. Gabby came to her side as Hannah reached
down for her schoolbag and tried to whip on her shoes.
"Hang on
a moment, darl. You can't go just yet." Gabby informed an
unwilling Hannah.
"No. If mum has to know then I'm out of
here!" Hannah yelled, trying to jump from Gabby's hands, which
pinned her to the bed. Hannah looked pleadingly up towards
Charlotte's face. Now Charlotte seemed to be the traitor, as she
too pinned Hannah down.
"Hannah. We won't bring mum in, but
you need to stay in the bed for me. Can you do that for me?"
Charlotte had quickly cupped Hannah's face in her hands and looked
straight through her eyes. Hannah nodded through Charlotte's hold,
who still had her face in her hands.
"Gabby, Hannah's mum
isn't to come in here, okay. Keep her in the waiting room until
we're ready." Hannah pulled from Charlotte's grasp. Gabby stood
waiting for further news.
"Or send her home." Hannah muttered,
curling back under her blankets. Charlotte turned towards the stats
monitor and drew out the blood pressure cuff.
"We're right in
here, thanks Gabby." Charlotte smiled genuinely at her staff
member. Gabby smiled in return and closed the curtains back up on her
way out.
"Mind if I take your pressure, Han?" Charlotte now
called her patient by a nickname in hopes it would have Hannah trust
her more. Hannah nodded, glaring straight down at her blankets.
"So,
tell me a bit about yourself, darl?" Charlotte smiled contently
down at her patient. Hannah was surprised at the sudden change of
topic, and gladly shot straight into this new conversation.
"Well.
I'm eighteen. I go to Sydney Co-Ed Grammar..." Charlotte kept the
conversation flowing as the cuff tightened around Hannah's
arm.
"Oh, a Grammar school student, hmm? What are you planning
to study after school?" Charlotte retrieved the thermometer and
tossed Hannah's hair over the other side of her pillow, and slid
the nozzle in her ear.
"Sport and Rec. Long dream of mine. It
was actually mum's, too. But she didn't quite get there..."
Hannah seemed somewhat withdrawn for a minute moment.
"I have no
doubt you will make it, sweetheart." A smile creeping across her
face again. It had been there for a while, but simply broadened with
every supportive statement she made. "Well, you don't have a
temperature. So, can we talk a little more?" Charlotte brushed her
hair back and rested a patient arm on her hip.
"I actually think
I need to get out of this bed for a bit. Am I right to go for a
walk.?" Hannah wouldn't give up. Charlotte couldn't be
frustrated; she empathised for the young girl. In compromise, she
continued.
"How about we
go for a walk, see how you're feeling, and we'll talk on the way,
darl?" Charlotte grasped Hannah's legs and swung them round the
edge of the bed. "Just take it easy, Han. We don't want any more
passing out, do we?" An anxious Hannah took hold of Charlotte's
arm for support as she stood on her feet.
"Dizzy?" Charlotte
asked. Hannah shook her head. Charlotte didn't want to risk Hannah
going down and injuring herself in the fall, so she maintained a
tight supportive arm around behind the patient's lower back. It
literally felt like Charlotte was holding her up. "It's okay,
Hannah. We can try again-" She began.
"No. No. I'm fine,
really. Let's go." Hannah smiled.
Walking through the
emergency doors, Charlotte and her patient, together in a tight
enclosure, approached the outdoors of All Saints Hospital. It had
been silence, no words, on the way here, the single focus being on
Hannah and keeping her upright.
"So what else do you need to
know, Dr. Beaumont?" Hannah's tone spoke more words than she did.
She was anxious of the questions to follow. They approached a park
bench, and Hannah slipped down, Charlotte close behind her.
"Where
did this 'pretty and skinny' phase come from?" Charlotte swept
Hannah's soft curls away from her face and took the patient's
hand in her own.
"Isn't it every girl's dream to be like
that?" Hannah spoke gently, twiddling her fingers against
Charlotte's soft hygienic skin. The hand wash Dr. Beaumont had
adapted to frequently had softened her hands almost to the point of
silk.
"Sure, Hannah. A dream.
Most likely, it's never a realistic occurrence. There's a lot of
photoshopping involved. A lot of dangerous diets and end exercise
regimes. You're a beautiful woman, now. Why would you think any
different?" Hannah was blown away by Charlotte's genuine honest
tone.
"There's a lot in my past. Some things you wouldn't
want to know, but they influenced this, I guess..." Charlotte could
sense that there was more to this girl than a borderline eating
disorder.
"You'll be surprised what sort of help I can
organise for you with information about your past. It does help,
darl. It really does. So, I have as long as I need to talk with you.
No better time than now to start telling me about your past
experiences!" Charlotte was keen. Almost so keen it frightened
Hannah. But Hannah knew nothing in her past was more difficult for
Charlotte to deal with than knowing she had a patient with a possible
eating disorder. So she let her trust fall in Charlotte's open and
willing heart and began.
"I was pregnant." This statement,
straight out of the blue shocked Charlotte. She composed herself with
a few simple private words. Expect
the unexpected,
she told herself.
"You 'was'
pregnant?" Charlotte realized at that moment how stupid she
sounded, and quickly backed it up. "Not 'am'
pregnant. 'Was'
pregnant? What happened, sweetheart?" Charlotte hoped it didn't
end with something along the lines of a miscarriage, or this would
become highly personal for Charlotte. She wanted to help her patient,
but with an ending like that, she knew she would not be able to
perform her job to the best of her ability.
"You have no idea
how it felt to be lying on a bed and feel those few sudden sharp
pains..." Charlotte's heart began to thump inside her chest. Not
a usual beating, but a serious thump. She could almost refer to it
with medical terminology. Tachycardia.
Just breathe.
She told herself.
"I could honestly say I do." Charlotte
stepped completely out of her comfort zone. But, being in the
patient's best interests, she didn't mind. If she could support
Hannah with her own experiences, she would. Hannah's eyes shot
straight up to Charlotte's. Her eyes still in their connecting
gaze, she continued.
"And glancing down and seeing the blood
stain in the sheets..." Hannah was almost asking a question, and
tears began rolling along her cheekbones for the second time today.
Charlotte nodded in understanding.
"M-hmm. And knowing you
couldn't do anything from that point on. Knowing it was over. There
was no more. I understand, exactly, sweetheart." Charlotte was
stroking Hannah's hairline again. It was soothing and gentle. A
real motherly touch, and Hannah felt she could just crumble in
Charlotte's arms. She needed more people like this in her
life.
"After that moment, I did everything I could to try and
get any guy's attention. Anything that would lead to something
else, which may have brought a second chance for me. I didn't care
if I did it with an absolute loser. If he gave me the opportunity to
have a baby back in my tummy, I would love him forever. That's all
I could see. I went completely blind. I lost my sense of reality.
God, I was so stupid!" This part, however, Charlotte could not
relate to.
"I think when we lose something so important, so
significant in our lives, we yearn for it. And we do silly things,
thinking, hoping, it might come back to us in some form or another.
And it doesn't most of the time. And it's normal to feel that
way. You were mourning over the baby you lost, Hannah, and that's
completely what I would expect, no matter what age you are." Gee,
did Charlotte have a way with words! Hannah continued, not holding
back anymore.
"Much to my disappointment, I hardly got any. I
snuck in a session with my best guy mate. He was more than willing to
help when he found out. But I took a test the other day, and it was
negative. It would have been perfect, to share genetics with a sweet
natured kid like him." Hannah showed signs of disrespect to
herself, looking down at her body in disgust and loathing every inch
she glared at.
"So the lack of male attention is where the whole
'I want to be pretty and thin' part comes in, right? Sweetheart,
have you spoken to anyone about losing the baby? In your womb, or
outside in the world, it's still your baby that you lost. I don't
think you're dealing well with it, darl."
"No. Nobody knew."
Hannah began sobbing. "I was only around nine weeks. I found out
the week before it happened, and I was considering how to tell mum.
The father was long gone, just some stupid fling I had. Nothing was
going anywhere fast, and I thought a baby would help keep things
glued. Then he walked out, and I couldn't tell him. I knew he
wouldn't come back. I swore I'd keep the baby so it wouldn't
suffer from my own foolish mistakes!" Hannah was now a withering,
crying, distraught mess. And Charlotte felt it was her job to get
this young girl the help she needed. Out of nowhere, Hannah jumped
from the bench quickly.
"I really should go, Dr. Beaumont. I'm
just a stupid young girl who can't be helped. Just leave me,
please." Hannah turned around to walk away forever, to leave the
one person she had trusted in for a long time.
"Hannah, wait a
moment. Sit back down, sweetheart. Let's talk some more."
Suddenly, Charlotte's phone rang in her pocket.
"Excuse me,
Hannah. Just wait here a moment." Charlotte stood and answered the
phone a few metres away, as Hannah stood impatiently.
"Beaumont!"
Frank's voice bellowed down the receiver into Charlotte's ear.
"Where the bloody hell did you get to?!" Charlotte sighed. She
was sick of being grilled by her boss.
"I have a patient I am
dealing with, Frank."
Charlotte grunted back. She was now whispering. "She's
emotionally unstable, and is about to walk out on me, don't leave
me talking to you if I don't have to, Frank. Is there chaos back in
the ED?" Charlotte glanced back at Hannah. But to her surprise,
there was no Hannah. Charlotte continued talking, glancing around in
a panic.
"No, no, we're fine." Charlotte didn't even hear
Frank's response.
"Shit!"
She cracked into the phone.
"What? What's going on?" Frank
now sounded panicked.
"Thanks Frank. She's gone." To this,
Charlotte hung up on her boss and scanned the area, one hand combing
through strands of her in stress mode, the other propped on her hip,
fingers curling in dread. She noticed through the carpark a young
Hannah making a run for her money, and with that, Charlotte
catapulted after her patient.
On reaching the carpark,
Charlotte discovered Hannah on the ground, her body almost lifeless.
Propping her fingers to the girl's throat in a desperate bid to
find a pulse, she was relieved. A faint pulse echoed against her
fingertips. Out of nowhere, Bree, a trained paramedic,
appeared.
"What happened Charlotte?" Bree tugged to her side a
kit of medical props and Charlotte pulled at the oxygen mask.
"Her
name's Hannah. Eighteen years of age. She passed out today at
school. Lack of food, and I took her outside for a talk. She took off
on me, and I've just found her now." The oxygen mask was whipped
onto Hannah's face, and she began spluttering into the mask.
Charlotte flashed her torch at Hannah's pupils.
"Hannah. Can
you hear me? It's Dr. Beaumont." Hannah didn't reply, but
continued coughing. Charlotte took her patient's hand.
"Can
you squeeze my hand for me, sweetheart?" And with that question,
Hannah took grasp of Charlotte's hand in a firm hold. Charlotte
didn't dare let go. Hannah came to quite quickly, and Bree and
Charlotte helped into a sitting position.
"I think I'm going
to throw-" But Hannah was too late, and ripped her mask from her
face to hurl her stomach contents into her lap. A disgusted look
crept onto her face.
"Don't worry about that sweetheart. We'll
get it cleaned up. Bree? Can we get a chair to wheel her back in?"
Charlotte was back in command, taking control of the situation as she
usually did. Bree took off to her ambulance in the ambo bay.
Suddenly, Hannah slumped forwards, and Charlotte's skilled hands
caught her patient around the chest in time.
"Ow." Hannah
muttered.
"Are you sore?" Charlotte asked, worried Hannah may
have fractured a bone during the fall. Brittle bones were an effect
of starvation.
"No, my boobs hurt. And you wrapped your arm
around them and now they hurt..." Hannah almost whined. Suddenly
Charlotte clicked. The
tiredness, the passing out, the tender breasts...
"Hannah,
when did you last get your period?" Charlotte was smiling, and
Hannah looked at her oddly through uneven strands of hair hovering
over her face.
"Um, I'm due in about a week, I guess...?"
Hannah was slightly suspicious. "Why?" Charlotte smiled down at
her patient as Bree returned with a chair on wheels.
"We'll
need a urine sample before I make the decision." Charlotte was all
smiles.
"Why? What?... What for?" Hannah was scared, and
Charlotte didn't answer the question. She simply helped her patient
onto the chair and Bree wheeled her off, Charlotte trailing along
behind, arms happily crossed across her chest.
Back in
Hannah's cubicle, Charlotte gently pulled at the curtains, and
closed them after her entrance. A smug little grin was tucked in
under her shielded face. Hannah sat up.
"You're killing me!
Tell me what you're thinking?!" Hannah stifled a laugh, and
Charlotte joined in with a giggle.
"My suggestion is you don't
rely on supermarket tests anymore, sweetheart..." Charlotte nodded
in a suggestive way. A way that led Hannah to think for herself what
Charlotte was getting at here.
"What? No way..." Hannah's
hand flew up to her mouth and her eyes bulged from her shocked
expression.
"You're only six weeks in, but you, darling, are
definitely pregnant. I must say congratulations." Charlotte smiled
and patted her patient on the leg. Hannah gazed down at her stomach
in shock, her mouth still hanging open in surprise. Then, she glanced
up at Charlotte.
"May I hug you?" She asked, her voice
cracking, and tears falling again. For the first time today,
Charlotte was pleased to see these tears in Hannah's eyes. And with
a smile, she wrapped her arms around her patient, then presented a
cordless phone to Hannah.
"You have someone to call. I believe
he is a best friend of yours...?" Charlotte's smug little grin
was still positioned on her glowing face. Hannah took the phone from
her in excitement.
"Um, you can organise that appointment if you
want..." Hannah suggested. Charlotte's eyebrows popped up in
uncertainty.
"Uh. What appointment would that be?" She asked,
confused.
"With the counsellor. And mum has probably left by
now. But if she's still here, she's welcome to come in."
Suddenly, her world seemed so perfect and if it were a picture,
Hannah was sure it would be glistening like white pearly diamonds.
Charlotte again stroked Hannah's hairline finally, and she
whispered in Hannah's ear, "Good girl. I'm so very,
very proud of you, sweetheart. I'll be back in a moment." And to
that, Hannah punched in the number of her best friend to announce the
news.
