Emotional Overload
-----
Rant: I'm really sorry for being absent from the fanfiction writing community for quite some time now. Ever since I took my leave of absence, I've begun to devolve when it came to writing anything at all! If you can stomach my bad writing style and highly amateuristic (Hey, I made up a new word!) method of storytelling, please come in and read. Otherwise, if many of you don't appreciate, or in the least, stomach my shonen-ai work, then please leave and don't even bother flaming me on your way out, I've just developed a natural resistance and immunity to all sorts of pyrotechnics. In any case, Daisuke centered shonen-ai coming up with a new character involved. Yes, another Mary Sue of my choosing, deal with me for now until I get rid of my Digimon obsession, okay? Now that you've managed to clear that, let's move on to the actual thing, shall we?
-----
Chapter one: For You
---
I'm confused. Thoroughly and completely confused.
Maybe I was underestimating the powers of the thin invisible line that humans have made to separate themselves from everyone else. Or maybe I've been too engrossed with finding out the answer to all of my life's meaningless questions that sometimes I take the easier way out instead of taking things into proper action.
But in either case, I still don't know why I can't fix things on my own.
It was a personal dilemma, one of those things that you don't even bother telling your shrink no matter how much a session with the man costs. No, it wasn't one of those questions that you could answer with careful calculation or because the answer came to you naturally. Think of it as the Roadrunner from the Looney Toons. No matter how ingenious, or clever, or even both, the plan of the coyote was, it was never good enough to catch the stick-like bird. No, I could not think myself out of this like I almost always did...
Normally, I would keep to myself and figure something out... But something inside of me was screaming to ask someone or help, even just this once... But my head told me not to...
And I always listened to that little voice in my head.
I hear footsteps from outside my room, obviously those of my mother bent on waking me up to get to school on the longest day of the week, Monday. The door opens up and my guess just so happens to be right, as I almost always wished they were. I stand up, she obviously notices that I've been awake ever since the early parts of the morning and leaves me to get dressed. The door closes with a slight bang and I can't help but stare at the doorknob... Early morning stares are very hard to shake off especially when you enjoy thinking alone...
The blue curtains of my room have been drawn to a close, the morning sun blending in with the cloth made me sometimes think about, well, almost everything. I do that. I do that a lot. I shake off the sleep by jumping quickly out of my bed, a sudden rush of blood to my noggin enough to yank me from laziness and back to the normal way I am.
I greet the mirror with a less than perky smile, maybe it was because of my profound hatred for the way my hair was. I could never fix it, no matter how much I used to try so I simply opted for having it all taken off. It's growing back now and, as I glide my fingers through it, it feels like soft fur. I was naturally vain, most of the people that I knew had knowledge of this fact first hand, although I had almost nothing to show for it except for my skinny yet athletic physique which I took very good care of. I wash up and I pick out my clothes from the closet straight ahead from my bed, leaving my room behind a disheveled mess as I made my way downstairs to the kitchen.
"Mornin'." That was almost always my only greeting to anyone and everyone that I was obliged to greet, like family and teachers. People have told me that I would be a lot more approachable if I wasn't so apathetic but that was what other people thought. I rarely cared about what other people thought. Other people like my family.
I was born with the name Tony Ramirez but I had to have my name changed the week that I arrived in Japan. It wasn't really a secret that most Japanese don't take kindly to foreigners, or Gaijin as we are called. My dad said that it would look more natural if we had Japanese names and passed ourselves off as immigrants from a long time ago. Our last name was changed to Andou while each of us had a completely new name to come up with our completely new aliases. Can't say that it really worked, nobody at all fell for that story.
My name's Toshi Andou now.
"Good morning Toshi." My mom says as I sit down to indulge in another one of those supposedly nutritious American cereals. I pour myself a bowl of Rice Krispies, probably the only American food that I actually enjoy, and simply watch the little things pop up as I pour Ice cold milk on them. My brother across the table notices this and shakes his head in some sort of 'I-can't-believe-that-I-have-to-live-with-you' way and quickly finishes up with his bowl just to get away from my open strangeness. I dig in, my head still filled with life-threatening questions like "Did I already finish that last boss off in Suikoden?" and "Whatever did happen to my collection of fanfiction?" looming in and out of my skull. I'm snapped back to reality once my cellphone beeps to tell me that I better get my lazy ass off to school. I push my bowl away from me and quickly exit my home, forgetting again how much my mom hated it when I would slam the door.
My home wasn't all too far off from my school, probably only a ten-minute walk and much less if I only didn't kill my bike last week. Not to mention that it was in one of the nicer neighborhoods in the prefecture. My house was what many real estate dealers would call prime location...
But there was another reason why I was glad I lived where I was.
"Ohayou Toshi-kun!"
It was because that everyday, on the dot, they'd be going to school as well.
I have to admit that I was the one person that many people would expect to have tons of friends or none at all. But somewhere in between I met these guys... And I don't know how I could even get by without them. I'd probably go insane trying to talk to the wall if I never met Daisuke and his friends. I remember the very first time we met vividly... But I don't want to reminisce since we probably met in histories most awkward way... I'll go into that some other time, but as of right now, Kiyo seems to have something else in mind...
"Ohayou Minna!" I raise my eyebrow, yet another one of those huge plastic bags dangled from both of her hands. That wouldn't be strange if only Daisuke wasn't lugging around a bright red cooler and Takeru wasn't carrying yet more of those plastic bags with the logo of her store on the front emblazoned in bold multi-colored kanji characters. Makes me wonder how she could have something so gaudy printed considering she's supposed to be a computer whiz. I guess she never was so much into web design as she was into programming.
"Now Toshi, you carry these." She shoves the bags that she was carrying right into my chest and, in usual Inoue fashion, not notice me almost fall backwards. Nor did she not notice that now, she wasn't carrying anything except or that measly little backpack of hers.
"And... What are these?"
"My parents are supporting your soccer team! These're some snacks that I brought along for everyone and the rest of the team."
"Don't you find it weird that Kiyo always seems to have food prepared for major events yet she never ever brings food for us?" Daisuke commented, a quick shot from a menacing Kiyo's eyes were enough to shut him up into nervous laughter. We ignored Daisuke's offhand comment and just begun our laborious march to school, Kiyo talking all the way about how we should thank her for being so nice to us all...
---
The school grounds were vibrant, probably because of the anticipation of the soccer semi-finals after classes. I guess that I was supposed to be used to the idea of hundreds of students coming together for one huge event but I wasn't... Maybe part of it was the fact that I was going to be a part in this event and I wasn't quite sure if I could put up a show as good as Dai.
Dai was one of the best soccer players that I've ever seen under the age of fifteen yet he wasn't team captain, which was in truth better for us because he really wasn't the thinking type. He played a little too aggressively, this being one of the reason why we would either win or lose. But over the months that I had spent with him I never felt like it was his fault. No matter how bad his plays were or how bad his judgment could become in the middle of a game, I could never say that it was his fault. Sometimes, I would even take the heat for him.
I just couldn't see him being the one who was wrong.
Yes, I think I liked Daisuke Motomiya, official hurricane of destruction for all twelve year olds out there to try and emulate. I was strangely attracted to him, even more so the crazier his antics became! Maybe it was because he was everything I wasn't and always wanted to be.
This was why I was confused. And I don't think I can ask anyone for help now.
"Are you okay Toshi?" I snap back to reality, the sudden sound of Daisuke's voice coming to me made me feel all awkward and dazed.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little light-headed, that's all." I answer back, sleep being the last thing that I would want to do now.
"At least that's one thing that you and Daisuke have in common." Hikari commented, Takeru and Iori chuckling at the idea that Daisuke and me have just one thing in relation to another. God, even I didn't think that that was humanly possible! I laughed along, trying to keep my obvious dazed thoughts out of harms way. Daisuke whines again about how he isn't as stupid as many of them give him credit for, as usual. I find that cute about him.
What am I talking about? I find everything about him cute!
"Well, I better get to class. Meet up with you guys later at the game, okay?" Iori separates from us and we each head to our respective classes after taking our cue from Iori. I felt a little irritated by that since I was a year higher than my current affection, the next time I see him would be later, before the soccer match...
-----
[ Hours later; Locker room ]
I was late for Soccer practice, My coach had begun to clearly point that out to me and my teammates in the most embarrassing way possible. I didn't care much for whatever he said to me, I was used to being late anyway. The coach's complaints and lecturing was falling on my deaf ears as my attention was more focused onto looking for Daisuke within the confines of the locker room. I spotted him yet I was careful enough not to move until my coach had finished yelling at me. I just nodded my head obediently until the entire Fiasco was over, my attention diverted solely towards the boy with deep red hair.
I wasn't that late, I could notice that since everybody else was just changing into their uniforms. My coach just felt like his day wouldn't be complete if he didn't shout at someone before the day was done so he simply picked me to be his target for the day.
I gave Dai the high five and prepared to change into my soccer uniform, although my eyes weren't focused on my own clothes. As I stood beside Daisuke, I realized that he was still every inch a boy, I could tell by simply looking at his lithe, under-developed frame. His skin was as smooth as ice, not a single hair visible other than that on his head. We both had the same coffee-colored skin, something that I found rather appealing about him...
Maybe I found it a little too appealing...
"Something wrong?" He asks me, I shake my head and prepared to be the same old dazed self that he remembered me as, although I doubt that he fell for that one.
"I'm okay. Just thinking of all the homework Nishikado sensei just loaded up on me a while ago." He nods and says something about him hating the way teachers would just pile up homework on us just to make us not enjoy the weekend. I wasn't paying attention, I was more engrossed in changing without him noticing my bulge from seeing him barechested. Something about the way he looked at me after that made me feel uneasy, as if he noticed what I was trying to hide. I shook it off as just being paranoid. After all, this is Daisuke Motomiya we're talking about, he couldn't possibly know anything about that...
I hope.
We wished each other the best of luck and then went off to play...
[ Two game halves later... ]
The whistle blew and that signaled the end of the last half, the game going into sudden death. I tried my best to get back to the bench but my legs seemed to have something else in mind for me, the needle like jabbing in my thigh was a sure sign of that. Daisuke had sat right next to me, his eyes closed as his breathing became ragged and difficult. I could not even begin to count the sweat drops accumulating on his forehead as they began falling one by one to the grass below. However, I'm sure that my condition was probably a lot worse than his...
And as much as I would have complained, Daisuke was chosen to be the one who would participate.
Logically, there was no better choice than Daisuke. He was the best striker that this team had right now. But I wasn't even sure I he could even continue the game in his stressed physical condition. There comes a time when even people frothing over with Hyperkinesia die out because of fatigue! Yes, even Daisuke had a line that could be crossed and I was afraid that coach didn't understand that.
But just as I opened up my mouth to complain, Dai had just gotten up from his seat once more, his eyes filled with the energy he had at the beginning of the game. The same sheer power that I thought had faded with forty minutes of almost nonstop running was back... And I smiled.
Daisuke had a line that could be crossed. However, I'm still not sure if we'll be able to find it.
I took my seat while most of my other teammates did not from excitement. I preferred to sit since it was a way of diverting attention away from yourself.
But strangely enough... It didn't work this time.
"Toshi." I looked up and saw Daisuke looking straight at me with a grin that seemed to extend even beyond his own facial limits. I almost laughed, seeing Daisuke's smile up close for the very first time but I kept my laughter under wraps.
"Good luck Dai." I said while giving him the V for Victory sign.
And before I knew it, my entire world had begun to spin in a completely different direction. And I wasn't sure if that was going to be a good thing.
"This shot's for you." He said to me in a quiet voice before sprinting off to take his shot... And I watched him, almost in slow motion, as he began that walk to his position... And I felt like the shot didn't even matter...
(Whoa! Rewind there Toshi! What did he just say? And what in the heck are you thinking! You think that Daisuke likes you? Do you think that just because he said one measly little sentence you're already an official couple?!)
Well... Yeah!
I wasn't sure if I knew what I was thinking off! I wasn't even sure if I was thinking at all! The strange notion that the person might even like me was going way off into a badly written episode of the Twilight Zone! My stomach suddenly got another one of its occasional panic attacks, brought on by my own idiotic self and presumptions. Maybe I was going crazy. Maybe I was beginning to become so damn obsessed with finding true love that every single thing that even remotely answers that question blares into an unimaginably loud fire siren that was also probably signaling my sheer stupidity. A goal for our team shouts out the end of the sudden death match...
And I didn't even jump up and act filled with cheerleader like joy.
All I heard was that one voice above all the rest that seemed to hover all around me.
"We won!" He cried out... Daisuke cried out, his eyes looking into mine as he was carried above on the shoulders of our teammates. A smile broke once again on his face and quickly turned into a peal of laughter, seemingly echoing deep inside my head. I simply stood there on the sidelines, watching him. The voices of all the gathered spectators fading farther and farther away...
I've never truly realized just how beautiful Daisuke looked every time he was simply being himself. When he would just boil over with laughter and energy, being the same old Dai that we all knew and loved... How he was so boyish and carefree, not even taking his time to think at all... There are times when I look back at him and realize that this was the kind of person that I would never want to be with at all costs!
Yet now, I seem to find myself falling head over heels for this klutz; This menace to all of society and all forms of conceivable grace and elegance.
Indeed... Now I think I know the answer to the question that I was asking myself this morning... Maybe now I know what my problem was... and, perhaps, how to fix it.
"That shot was for me." My eyes closed in on his, locking in a karmic embrace of emotion... and that was all that mattered.
Goal.
End Chapter one
-----
Rant: I'm really sorry for being absent from the fanfiction writing community for quite some time now. Ever since I took my leave of absence, I've begun to devolve when it came to writing anything at all! If you can stomach my bad writing style and highly amateuristic (Hey, I made up a new word!) method of storytelling, please come in and read. Otherwise, if many of you don't appreciate, or in the least, stomach my shonen-ai work, then please leave and don't even bother flaming me on your way out, I've just developed a natural resistance and immunity to all sorts of pyrotechnics. In any case, Daisuke centered shonen-ai coming up with a new character involved. Yes, another Mary Sue of my choosing, deal with me for now until I get rid of my Digimon obsession, okay? Now that you've managed to clear that, let's move on to the actual thing, shall we?
-----
Chapter one: For You
---
I'm confused. Thoroughly and completely confused.
Maybe I was underestimating the powers of the thin invisible line that humans have made to separate themselves from everyone else. Or maybe I've been too engrossed with finding out the answer to all of my life's meaningless questions that sometimes I take the easier way out instead of taking things into proper action.
But in either case, I still don't know why I can't fix things on my own.
It was a personal dilemma, one of those things that you don't even bother telling your shrink no matter how much a session with the man costs. No, it wasn't one of those questions that you could answer with careful calculation or because the answer came to you naturally. Think of it as the Roadrunner from the Looney Toons. No matter how ingenious, or clever, or even both, the plan of the coyote was, it was never good enough to catch the stick-like bird. No, I could not think myself out of this like I almost always did...
Normally, I would keep to myself and figure something out... But something inside of me was screaming to ask someone or help, even just this once... But my head told me not to...
And I always listened to that little voice in my head.
I hear footsteps from outside my room, obviously those of my mother bent on waking me up to get to school on the longest day of the week, Monday. The door opens up and my guess just so happens to be right, as I almost always wished they were. I stand up, she obviously notices that I've been awake ever since the early parts of the morning and leaves me to get dressed. The door closes with a slight bang and I can't help but stare at the doorknob... Early morning stares are very hard to shake off especially when you enjoy thinking alone...
The blue curtains of my room have been drawn to a close, the morning sun blending in with the cloth made me sometimes think about, well, almost everything. I do that. I do that a lot. I shake off the sleep by jumping quickly out of my bed, a sudden rush of blood to my noggin enough to yank me from laziness and back to the normal way I am.
I greet the mirror with a less than perky smile, maybe it was because of my profound hatred for the way my hair was. I could never fix it, no matter how much I used to try so I simply opted for having it all taken off. It's growing back now and, as I glide my fingers through it, it feels like soft fur. I was naturally vain, most of the people that I knew had knowledge of this fact first hand, although I had almost nothing to show for it except for my skinny yet athletic physique which I took very good care of. I wash up and I pick out my clothes from the closet straight ahead from my bed, leaving my room behind a disheveled mess as I made my way downstairs to the kitchen.
"Mornin'." That was almost always my only greeting to anyone and everyone that I was obliged to greet, like family and teachers. People have told me that I would be a lot more approachable if I wasn't so apathetic but that was what other people thought. I rarely cared about what other people thought. Other people like my family.
I was born with the name Tony Ramirez but I had to have my name changed the week that I arrived in Japan. It wasn't really a secret that most Japanese don't take kindly to foreigners, or Gaijin as we are called. My dad said that it would look more natural if we had Japanese names and passed ourselves off as immigrants from a long time ago. Our last name was changed to Andou while each of us had a completely new name to come up with our completely new aliases. Can't say that it really worked, nobody at all fell for that story.
My name's Toshi Andou now.
"Good morning Toshi." My mom says as I sit down to indulge in another one of those supposedly nutritious American cereals. I pour myself a bowl of Rice Krispies, probably the only American food that I actually enjoy, and simply watch the little things pop up as I pour Ice cold milk on them. My brother across the table notices this and shakes his head in some sort of 'I-can't-believe-that-I-have-to-live-with-you' way and quickly finishes up with his bowl just to get away from my open strangeness. I dig in, my head still filled with life-threatening questions like "Did I already finish that last boss off in Suikoden?" and "Whatever did happen to my collection of fanfiction?" looming in and out of my skull. I'm snapped back to reality once my cellphone beeps to tell me that I better get my lazy ass off to school. I push my bowl away from me and quickly exit my home, forgetting again how much my mom hated it when I would slam the door.
My home wasn't all too far off from my school, probably only a ten-minute walk and much less if I only didn't kill my bike last week. Not to mention that it was in one of the nicer neighborhoods in the prefecture. My house was what many real estate dealers would call prime location...
But there was another reason why I was glad I lived where I was.
"Ohayou Toshi-kun!"
It was because that everyday, on the dot, they'd be going to school as well.
I have to admit that I was the one person that many people would expect to have tons of friends or none at all. But somewhere in between I met these guys... And I don't know how I could even get by without them. I'd probably go insane trying to talk to the wall if I never met Daisuke and his friends. I remember the very first time we met vividly... But I don't want to reminisce since we probably met in histories most awkward way... I'll go into that some other time, but as of right now, Kiyo seems to have something else in mind...
"Ohayou Minna!" I raise my eyebrow, yet another one of those huge plastic bags dangled from both of her hands. That wouldn't be strange if only Daisuke wasn't lugging around a bright red cooler and Takeru wasn't carrying yet more of those plastic bags with the logo of her store on the front emblazoned in bold multi-colored kanji characters. Makes me wonder how she could have something so gaudy printed considering she's supposed to be a computer whiz. I guess she never was so much into web design as she was into programming.
"Now Toshi, you carry these." She shoves the bags that she was carrying right into my chest and, in usual Inoue fashion, not notice me almost fall backwards. Nor did she not notice that now, she wasn't carrying anything except or that measly little backpack of hers.
"And... What are these?"
"My parents are supporting your soccer team! These're some snacks that I brought along for everyone and the rest of the team."
"Don't you find it weird that Kiyo always seems to have food prepared for major events yet she never ever brings food for us?" Daisuke commented, a quick shot from a menacing Kiyo's eyes were enough to shut him up into nervous laughter. We ignored Daisuke's offhand comment and just begun our laborious march to school, Kiyo talking all the way about how we should thank her for being so nice to us all...
---
The school grounds were vibrant, probably because of the anticipation of the soccer semi-finals after classes. I guess that I was supposed to be used to the idea of hundreds of students coming together for one huge event but I wasn't... Maybe part of it was the fact that I was going to be a part in this event and I wasn't quite sure if I could put up a show as good as Dai.
Dai was one of the best soccer players that I've ever seen under the age of fifteen yet he wasn't team captain, which was in truth better for us because he really wasn't the thinking type. He played a little too aggressively, this being one of the reason why we would either win or lose. But over the months that I had spent with him I never felt like it was his fault. No matter how bad his plays were or how bad his judgment could become in the middle of a game, I could never say that it was his fault. Sometimes, I would even take the heat for him.
I just couldn't see him being the one who was wrong.
Yes, I think I liked Daisuke Motomiya, official hurricane of destruction for all twelve year olds out there to try and emulate. I was strangely attracted to him, even more so the crazier his antics became! Maybe it was because he was everything I wasn't and always wanted to be.
This was why I was confused. And I don't think I can ask anyone for help now.
"Are you okay Toshi?" I snap back to reality, the sudden sound of Daisuke's voice coming to me made me feel all awkward and dazed.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little light-headed, that's all." I answer back, sleep being the last thing that I would want to do now.
"At least that's one thing that you and Daisuke have in common." Hikari commented, Takeru and Iori chuckling at the idea that Daisuke and me have just one thing in relation to another. God, even I didn't think that that was humanly possible! I laughed along, trying to keep my obvious dazed thoughts out of harms way. Daisuke whines again about how he isn't as stupid as many of them give him credit for, as usual. I find that cute about him.
What am I talking about? I find everything about him cute!
"Well, I better get to class. Meet up with you guys later at the game, okay?" Iori separates from us and we each head to our respective classes after taking our cue from Iori. I felt a little irritated by that since I was a year higher than my current affection, the next time I see him would be later, before the soccer match...
-----
[ Hours later; Locker room ]
I was late for Soccer practice, My coach had begun to clearly point that out to me and my teammates in the most embarrassing way possible. I didn't care much for whatever he said to me, I was used to being late anyway. The coach's complaints and lecturing was falling on my deaf ears as my attention was more focused onto looking for Daisuke within the confines of the locker room. I spotted him yet I was careful enough not to move until my coach had finished yelling at me. I just nodded my head obediently until the entire Fiasco was over, my attention diverted solely towards the boy with deep red hair.
I wasn't that late, I could notice that since everybody else was just changing into their uniforms. My coach just felt like his day wouldn't be complete if he didn't shout at someone before the day was done so he simply picked me to be his target for the day.
I gave Dai the high five and prepared to change into my soccer uniform, although my eyes weren't focused on my own clothes. As I stood beside Daisuke, I realized that he was still every inch a boy, I could tell by simply looking at his lithe, under-developed frame. His skin was as smooth as ice, not a single hair visible other than that on his head. We both had the same coffee-colored skin, something that I found rather appealing about him...
Maybe I found it a little too appealing...
"Something wrong?" He asks me, I shake my head and prepared to be the same old dazed self that he remembered me as, although I doubt that he fell for that one.
"I'm okay. Just thinking of all the homework Nishikado sensei just loaded up on me a while ago." He nods and says something about him hating the way teachers would just pile up homework on us just to make us not enjoy the weekend. I wasn't paying attention, I was more engrossed in changing without him noticing my bulge from seeing him barechested. Something about the way he looked at me after that made me feel uneasy, as if he noticed what I was trying to hide. I shook it off as just being paranoid. After all, this is Daisuke Motomiya we're talking about, he couldn't possibly know anything about that...
I hope.
We wished each other the best of luck and then went off to play...
[ Two game halves later... ]
The whistle blew and that signaled the end of the last half, the game going into sudden death. I tried my best to get back to the bench but my legs seemed to have something else in mind for me, the needle like jabbing in my thigh was a sure sign of that. Daisuke had sat right next to me, his eyes closed as his breathing became ragged and difficult. I could not even begin to count the sweat drops accumulating on his forehead as they began falling one by one to the grass below. However, I'm sure that my condition was probably a lot worse than his...
And as much as I would have complained, Daisuke was chosen to be the one who would participate.
Logically, there was no better choice than Daisuke. He was the best striker that this team had right now. But I wasn't even sure I he could even continue the game in his stressed physical condition. There comes a time when even people frothing over with Hyperkinesia die out because of fatigue! Yes, even Daisuke had a line that could be crossed and I was afraid that coach didn't understand that.
But just as I opened up my mouth to complain, Dai had just gotten up from his seat once more, his eyes filled with the energy he had at the beginning of the game. The same sheer power that I thought had faded with forty minutes of almost nonstop running was back... And I smiled.
Daisuke had a line that could be crossed. However, I'm still not sure if we'll be able to find it.
I took my seat while most of my other teammates did not from excitement. I preferred to sit since it was a way of diverting attention away from yourself.
But strangely enough... It didn't work this time.
"Toshi." I looked up and saw Daisuke looking straight at me with a grin that seemed to extend even beyond his own facial limits. I almost laughed, seeing Daisuke's smile up close for the very first time but I kept my laughter under wraps.
"Good luck Dai." I said while giving him the V for Victory sign.
And before I knew it, my entire world had begun to spin in a completely different direction. And I wasn't sure if that was going to be a good thing.
"This shot's for you." He said to me in a quiet voice before sprinting off to take his shot... And I watched him, almost in slow motion, as he began that walk to his position... And I felt like the shot didn't even matter...
(Whoa! Rewind there Toshi! What did he just say? And what in the heck are you thinking! You think that Daisuke likes you? Do you think that just because he said one measly little sentence you're already an official couple?!)
Well... Yeah!
I wasn't sure if I knew what I was thinking off! I wasn't even sure if I was thinking at all! The strange notion that the person might even like me was going way off into a badly written episode of the Twilight Zone! My stomach suddenly got another one of its occasional panic attacks, brought on by my own idiotic self and presumptions. Maybe I was going crazy. Maybe I was beginning to become so damn obsessed with finding true love that every single thing that even remotely answers that question blares into an unimaginably loud fire siren that was also probably signaling my sheer stupidity. A goal for our team shouts out the end of the sudden death match...
And I didn't even jump up and act filled with cheerleader like joy.
All I heard was that one voice above all the rest that seemed to hover all around me.
"We won!" He cried out... Daisuke cried out, his eyes looking into mine as he was carried above on the shoulders of our teammates. A smile broke once again on his face and quickly turned into a peal of laughter, seemingly echoing deep inside my head. I simply stood there on the sidelines, watching him. The voices of all the gathered spectators fading farther and farther away...
I've never truly realized just how beautiful Daisuke looked every time he was simply being himself. When he would just boil over with laughter and energy, being the same old Dai that we all knew and loved... How he was so boyish and carefree, not even taking his time to think at all... There are times when I look back at him and realize that this was the kind of person that I would never want to be with at all costs!
Yet now, I seem to find myself falling head over heels for this klutz; This menace to all of society and all forms of conceivable grace and elegance.
Indeed... Now I think I know the answer to the question that I was asking myself this morning... Maybe now I know what my problem was... and, perhaps, how to fix it.
"That shot was for me." My eyes closed in on his, locking in a karmic embrace of emotion... and that was all that mattered.
Goal.
End Chapter one