Sea of Stars

Matthew sighed softly, burying his face into Alfred's chest, fingers gripping his bomber jacket, taking comfort in the scent of him, the strong smell of a summer night when there was no wind, the smell of apple blossoms, the smell of spice. He whimpered, bit his lip to keep the tears at bay, and mouthed the only words he knew how to say around Alfred over and over.

"I love you. I love you. I love you."

Hoped Alfred could hear it with his heart, because he didn't want to say it out loud. Didn't want Alfred to know how much his going away was affecting him. Didn't want to think about a second without Alfred by his side.

Alfred kissed the top of his head, his arms so secure around him, Matthew wondered how he was supposed to feel safe while Alfred was away.

"Mattie."

His voice was soft and sure, and Matthew shook his head, leaning up to kiss Alfred's throat. His jaw. His chin. He didn't want to look up, into the perfection of Alfred's eyes and see what he was thinking. Didn't want to see fear. Of a constant, ever changing variable. An unknown. An ending that couldn't be predicted.

This war.

"Mattie look at me."

He looked up and saw only a smile, glowing bravery and freedom, justice and dreams. Then starlight sparkled in the poetic blue of his eyes, and his smile was gentle. They kissed, slow and sweet, and Matthew savored the taste of him. He wanted Alfred to make love to him, over and over, until he knew the feel of his body by heart.

He didn't want him to leave.

"Don't look anywhere else, Mattie. Just keep looking at me."

Alfred's skin was soft beneath his lips, and the grass tickled his skin as he laid it bare for Alfred, wanted him to look, devour him with his eyes, so he wouldn't ever forget. Their next kiss was just as slow. Just as heart wrenching. Just as painful and as erotic that he sobbed. Gasped when Alfred pushed in, fingers clenching in the grass and eyes wide open so that he could watch Alfred.

Watch the look of bliss that crossed his face every time Matthew forced himself down. Watched the way Alfred's lips twitched into a smirk, then a grin whenever their eyes met. Watched Alfred enjoy his body, and gaze at him with pure adoration, so loving that Matthew felt warm. Felt distressed in the warmth and filled his own gaze with the same affection until Alfred groaned, pulling him in for another sweet kiss.

He leaned down, close to Alfred's throat, screamed his I love you's till he was hoarse and spent, panting with exertion. Alfred gathered him in his arms, laying him in the sweetly scented grass to curl in his arms.

"If the world ended tomorrow, Mattie, what would you do?"

Matthew didn't answer. He didn't have to. He held Alfred close and smelled himself on his skin, mixed with sweat and summer and sex. Wanted to drown in the scent while Alfred peppered endless kisses on the top of his head, wandering fingers "appreciating" his curves and ridges.

He didn't care what would happen if the world ended. He just knew that he would hold Alfred.

"Have you ever imagined that the sky was an ocean, Mattie?"

Above them, millions of stars glistened and twinkled, millions of miles away, millions of unseen places, millions of unexplored possibilities. Alfred smiled, and the stars caught on his teeth, his fingernails, his sweat dampened skin.

He shook his head, smiling warmly and tried to distract himself with Alfred's rambles. He'd never imagined it. Only knew that he didn't need an ocean or a sky. Didn't need the stars or the moon or the sun. Not when Alfred loudly proclaimed that he would be Matthew's everything, and that Matthew was his.

"I'll make you a promise, Mattie. We'll sail that sea of Stars, okay?"

He laughed, a deep rumbling sound that stirred the dense night. Matthew laughed softly too, and that kiss then was slower, sweeter, lovelier than all the others. Their lips and tongues and teeth moved, and they laughed into the kiss, sobbed into the kiss, fingers traveling paths they knew well but wanted to know better.

"Okay."

Owari.