First Mistake
Just sitting beneath the summer trees
Summer all around, summer breeze
Love is easy going, lazy and a surfer at heart always trying to ride the wave out
Riding in the car top down summer being breathed in
Lets waste time looking at the sky and in your eyes
Dusty twilight learning about love
Feeling lonely teenager, summer love first kiss first love
Can't be yourself too worried about what people will think, first boy, first to make you let go
Summer boy, summer cool summer together run away walking in the lazy sun
Lay on your back, get grass stains, get away, dream, find your way
One boy one summer butterflies, talking, wishing, dreaming, waiting
Dirty feet, dirty hands, sandy footprints, lessons in love what will be will be
Naïve, childish, sweet dreams love you god bless
Hold hands, hold on don't let go, don't forget together forever
Turn it upside down, sing so loud like no one can hear watch it grow
Be yourself, share the love, I'll never forget promise
Cross my heart not my fingers, the ocean sea nothing is impossible
I don't want it to go away, follow your heart dance till you can't
Is this how it goes make up your own way dream till morning
Wish upon a star, fire flies time flies
Look into the fire feel the sun watch them go
Your on your way, they grow old nothing stops, lets try
2000 miles, 2000 hours, 2000 times
Find your feet find your voice find your love find the boy find your way.
"Quiet down everyone please!" shouted Mrs Weible across the crowded room her red face bobbing up above the crowd of girls, "Are everyone's votes in? This is your last chance….ok, well we will be back after we have counted them."
"Oh god, I am so nervous I know this is my first time running, but I think I have a good chance," I said fiddling with my little heart pendant which always hung in the same place around my neck.
"Of course you do Andie, look you are by the far the prettiest girl on the squad and that Bella well she's old news now she won't get captain again," said one of my cable knit cardigan clad groupies Sasha running a hand through her preened blonde hair.
"Oh my god look it's Bella she's coming over Lily help," I squealed feeling Bella's thickly eyeliner rimmed eyes boring in to me.
Act cool Andie, I said to myself as Bella sauntered over.
"Hi Andie you know I would be really pleased if you got-"
"Girls the votes have been counted," Mrs Weible called out cutting Bella off in mid sentence, "And Coach Redford and I are pleased to welcome our new cheer captain Andie Hope!"
Applause broke out and I; the cute clean cut girl squeezed into the middle of the surrounding cheerleaders.
"Congratulations Andie, see you soon, hopefully we can hang out sometime," said Bella floating off in to the crowd the edge of her skirt disappearing out of the door the sound of her clanking bangles fading, I looked around to see Bella and Willow jumping in to a green open backed jeep, which raced down the road in the dusty heat.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"I'm not sure Bella I don't think it's my thing. You know," I said from behind the changing room curtain.
"Oh come on Andie just come out,"
I slowly edged out of the changing room wearing some small denim shorts and a floaty ethnic top. Ever since I had won the position as captain, which felt like years ago, I had been spending most of my time with Bella and her gang and now it was a Friday night, two weeks before summer vacation started and I was carefully studying my reflection in the mirror of the small changing room of La Corde.
"Wow you look tonnes better in that than I did, god your so skinny Andie!" said Bella pulling the curtain back and picking up some chunky gold bracelets to go with the top.
"You think I should get it then?" I said squinting at myself in the mirror again, as I studied myself looking at how the shorts looked far too short and the top clung around my chest.
"Definitely, it'll be perfect for tonight,"
"Tonight! You've got to be joking, I'll freeze!"
"God Andie have a life, don't worry seriously!" Bella said blowing her bangs out of her face and rolling her eyes at me.
I paid for the clothes and we left the shop joking and laughing and then piled in to Bella's beetle convertible with all the shopping bags. I knew it was a bad idea agreeing to go to the party, for one, I knew my Mom would kill me and there would be loads of college guys there and everyone knew they were only about one thing. Even knowing all this I sat back in Bella's car looking at the bright blue summer sky overhead as we raced down the highway, and I was just happy to be finally in with the popular crowd.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Wow there's loads of people here Bella," I said nervously looking round the beach which was packed with people bumping up against each other.
"God don't you just live for this smell, you know summer, sand, sea, bonfire smoke!" said Bella excited to start partying and already twirling round in little circles as guys stared at her eyeing her up in a way that made my stomach flip nervously.
"I don't really know anyone Bella and…"
"Shut up and let's go over here," she said grabbing my arm and dragging me in to the middle of the group of throbbing people all with cigarettes dangling in their hands and bottles of beer.
Bella strutted over to a load of college boys passing round a joint, and I stupidly followed nervously tugging at my new floaty top.
"Guys this is Andie, you know the bitch that took my position as cheer captain!" joked Bella shaking her blonde hair back as she laughed.
"Hey Andie, cheer captain that's pretty big," said one guy taking a gulp from his bottle and then licking his lips.
"Don't be rude Bret offer the lady a drink…or a smoke," said one of the other guys in the group.
"Oh yeah god where are my manners, beer?" the first guy said digging around in a cooler.
"Umm sure," I said even though I had never really drunk that much before since my Mom would have gone crazy if I had turned up to cheerleading training with a hang over. Bella was already taking a long drag on the joint, shaking her hair and being her usual sure self; the beach was swarming with girls all trying to impress the pretty eyed boys, throwing themselves in to their hands not worrying about the consequences.
"Here want a smoke," one guy in a red shirt asked.
"Well I don't really smoke…" I began.
"Well you do now, here," he said putting it to my lips; I coughed and spluttered my head spinning and grabbed on to his arm to steady myself.
"Woah there," he laughed, "You really haven't done this before have you," he said grinning in such a cute way that made me want to jump in to his arms.
The music boomed Bella was bumping and rubbing up against some guy with a lot of hair gel in and a blue t-shirt and I was getting baked and boozed over in the corner with the guy in the red shirt that had been a complete stranger before this night. All the lights seemed brighter and the smells all stronger, my head felt as though it was on a rollercoaster and all I could do was cling on to the guy in the red shirt. I had never acted like this ever before, I had never really got drunk, only once at my cousins wedding and even then my Mom went crazy, and I had definitely never tried drugs and I cringed just at the thought of my Mom finding out and what she would do.
"Wow this party is really great," I slurred, "I love Bella you know, and you," I slurred again breathing in the strong scent of his cologne that made me feel even more light headed.
"Mmm yeah that's really great," he said kissing my neck, his hands round my waist and I didn't try to protest even though deep down inside me I know I should have.
In the heat and the blur of the party everything was hazy as I made out with the red shirt guy, but after a while he started to get bored and said,
"Let's go to my car."
I didn't really think it through nothing made sense to me that night and I didn't realize that from that night on nothing would in my life. Before everything had been neatly laid out for me mostly by my mother and I did it all with a smile, I never stayed out late, got drunk, had sex or rebelled.
Too drunk to really care I took his hand and let him lead me in to his old mustang, the leather was hot even with the windows open and the smell of the summer jasmine, gasoline and heat haze filled the car. Everything happened so fast I knew I was in way over my head but for once I didn't care , I didn't care that my first time would be in the back of and old car with a complete stranger in a red shirt. But after that night I realised I did care, I cared a lot that he, someone I didn't know at all had taken something from me, something that should have been special or with someone special, he had taken that away from me.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Just let it all out, you know it's good to get it all out of your system," said Bella as I head my head stuck down the toilet.
"Bella I don't feel s good, I don't even really remember what I did last night," I groaned wiping my mouth after I'd stopped being sick.
"Well you were pretty baked- wait you don't even remember getting off with that guy in the red shirt in the back of his car!" she laughed as if it was an everyday thing that you do.
"Yeah, that bit I do remember," I muttered.
"I mean way to go girl! I nearly got one in the bag with that, oh what was his name…Jeremy!" she said filing a snagged nail.
"So this is just what you do?" I said lying on Bella's bed my head still a bit hazy, "I mean at parties you just do it with guys," I said looking at the dark circles around her eyes and the fresh break out of spots on her forehead, the repercussions of a night out I thought.
"Well not all the time! But yeah," she said flipping through Vogue, "Can you open those two windows for me," she reaching down from her bed to her bag.
"Yeah…why?" I went over and lifted up the windows to let in the smell of mown grass.
"So you can't smell all the smoke," said Bella getting a packet of Camel Lights out of her bag, "My Mom doesn't really know I smoke, here" she said throwing me a cigarette.
"Oh umm I don't really smoke," I said turning the cigarette round in my fingers.
"Oh come on Andie, so you don't smoke cigarettes but you smoke weed?" said Bella lighting up and then passing me her lighter.
"Fine," I said lighting my cigarette and taking a drag, this time I didn't cough, probably because I was used to it after smoking so much the night before but it still felt weird holding it in my hand, like a foreign object that didn't belong in my hands, I was used to seeing all the sluts smoking round the back of school or the pothead guys outside the mall but not me, Andie Hope.
"You know, you're really pretty, why don't you make the most of it?" said Bella dangling her legs out of the window.
"Oh you've got to be kidding Bella, me, pretty?" I said a bit taken aback at Bella's random comment.
"Yeahh, don't bullshit me Andie, I know you know it why else would you have run for cheer captain?"
"I guess," I said just staring out at the sky which was partly clouded by plumes of smoke from the cigarette.
"Party tonight you know," said Bella flicking the ash from her cigarette and sending it flying down to the grass below.
"Oh- where is it, I don't really know whether my Mom wants me back seeing as I was out last night,"
"At some guy's house Seth and Ben are taking us, you're wearing my blue dress," she said matter of factly.
"Wait, Bella I don't know whether I can go," I said stubbing out the cigarette on the window sill and jumping down.
"Oh for God sake Andie just have some life for once, am I not teaching you anything? We don't have to do what ever people want us to do, we do what we want, you can be what ever you want to be, don't you get it?"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
After what seemed like forever the summer vacation came, and I had officially joined Bella's circle of friends, or as I used to refer to them the sluts. I didn't even know how I got there but somehow I did and it didn't make me proud, not at all. Mom had started getting annoyed at me as well, because I wasn't practicing as much and I was staying out late.
It was like I was living double lives; I would be at home practising cheer moves or choreographing for the next pep rally, studying and being the good girl next door like Mom wanted me to be. But then Bella would pick me up it would all change, I got dragged in to things that I didn't want to do.
I hated being so secretive but something wouldn't let the after dark side of me take over my life, I didn't want that girl to be all of me for my own sake I had to keep half of her shut away buried deep down, I didn't even like drinking or smoking and all of the guys were just beefy football guys who pawed you all over and that made me feel sick.
Some days I told myself I would just leave Bella not be friends with her and the other girls, go back to my old life being focused on cheerleading, having friends who didn't always go out and party, but it never happened.
It always felt as though somehow someone else was controlling my life, like I was trapped in this glass cage watching this robot of a person lead my life do what everyone told her to do whilst I just banged my fists up against the glass but no one could hear me. So I did my Mom told me by being the good all American girl, and then I did what Bella thought I should do, things that would make my Mom's eyes pop out of her head, the problem was neither of those girls were the real me.
"Andie can you go in to town for me, I need you to get me some flowers from the florists, I'm going to visit Stella and I'm a bit busy at the moment," Mom called over the noise of her hair dryer, I had been off for summer for just under a week now and I could tell Mom was already getting annoyed at my constant presence in the house.
"Sure I'll go in a minute," I said pulling on a t-shirt, some track pants, my flip flops and quickly tying my hair up.
I grabbed my keys and got in to my little beaten up car, driving past the kids jumping through sprinklers, riding their bikes, playing tag and running around in their yards.
I pulled in to a space outside the little florists, it was painted pale green and looked as thought it was exploding with flowers, I always thought that if someone opened the door then all of the flowers would spill out as if the walls and the door were the only things squeezing them in to the small space. The bell tinkled as I opened the door, I'd driven past the shop so many times but I'd never actually been inside, it smelt like summer jasmine and vanilla inside and was so colourful in the afternoon sun it dazzled. There was a guy at the counter I was pretty surprised I guess when he turned around and was, well very handsome, strong cheekbones, fair hair and a lean sports toned body, I didn't realise gorgeous guys hung out at florists or that they even existed round where I lived.
"Hey can I help?" he said half smiling as he piled some pots up on the counter.
"Umm flowers," I said, "I just need some flowers for my Mom," I said barely able to string the words together.
"Well you've come to the right place then" he laughed.
"Well that's good to know, I don't really know what flowers my Mom wants…" I said now so aware I was in some old holey track pants a t-shirt and flip flops.
"Well let me put something together for you, how about some Calla Lilies with Giant Chincherinchee, Fern, Papyrus and Philodendron Leaves?"
"Sounds good!" I said surprised at how much he seemed to know, and shamelessly staring at him like a love sick puppy dog.
"Don't worry I'm not really a flower enthusiast, it's my Mom's shop I just help out and she tells me what to do, which plants to put together," he said picking out flowers and leaves and trimming the ends ready to be tied up.
"It's a really great shop, I'd always wanted to come in," I said still finding it hard to form a sentence.
"I'm glad you like it, some people just think it's weird, I guess my Mom is a bit of a hippy, she does things her own way," he said tying up the flowers.
"That's a good thing, I wish I always did things my own way," I said then regretting it as I hadn't realised how stupid it sounded and why was I telling him anyway.
"You can always do things your own way," he said staring at me for a while until he turned away to finish up the bouquet.
"I didn't realize flower arranging was a guy thing," I said.
"It's not really, I don't think, I just like being in the shop you know you can see everything that happens out there," he said nodding towards the big window which looked out on to the main street.
"Yeah I know what you mean," I said staring as two girls walked past swooning over the him each of them eating him up with their eyes.
"I'm Harry by the way," he said shaking my hand and smiling that crooked smile.
"I'm Andie," I said, and that was that.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Come on wake up Andie you have to go running and stretch before practice," said my Mom waking me up. The clock flashed 6:30 and all I wanted was at least another half an hour but I knew that would never happen.
"I'll see you outside in ten minutes, and I mean it Andie," she said that same I'm your bad ass coach voice on.
I got up slowly and pulled on some track pants a sports top and my running shoes, quickly grabbing my ipod from the top of my draws. Already Mom had her stop watch out dressed in her tracksuit and tapping her foot impatiently as I came out the door.
"Right normal route Andie, and please this time lets put a little bit of effort in to it," she said clicking the button on the stop watch, and for a second I just watched as the numbers flickered on the little screen indicating every small mini second of my life I was losing.
So I plugged in my ipod and started pounding my feet on the asphalt the same strong beat that my feet knew the best, flicking through my songs as the sky and the road stretched out in front of me. I let music fill my mind and I kept running pacing strongly until I came to that short stretch of road where six shops were packed together, and I had to slow down as I passed that one shop painted pale green outside but bursting with colour inside. There was an old lady inside picking an orchid with her small dog yapping at her ankles, Harry was there guiding her through their selection as she inspected each one as if her life depended on it. I just stood there staring through the window for a second until he turned around and caught my eye and like that I was off again running so fast I felt my breath catch in my throat. The sky that had been so blue when I first set out had now turned to that grey slate colour warning you that rain was coming, so I started to run faster and faster leaving every worry behind me on that lonely road, that was always why I loved running although I moaned about it to my mom I knew it was one of the only things that let me feel truly free. As soon as I shut the door behind me the rain pelted down falling down the window pane in great gushes and making the world seem so distant. I went to my room to put on my freshly pressed cheer training outfit, a starched and ironed perfectly navy blue t-shirt with the words 'Redford Ravens' emblazed across the front and the matching navy shorts. I pulled my hair in to the same uniform ponytail and white ribbon tied neatly in a bow. I knew this routine so well it had been the same every Saturday morning since I was nine, cheerleading was just programmed in to me now like an ordinary format, the default setting.
The rain had subsided now but the girls were still grumbling about the wet ground, Mom dropped me off giving me the 'pull it together Andie, you have to do well, which you haven't been doing lately' speech that she seemed to be telling me every second of everyday now.
"Are we all here now?" said Mrs Weible looking out across the squad all dressed in the same navy blue.
Mrs Weible thought she was a good coach seeing as she had been head cheerleader for three years in a row when she attended Redford High as a teenager, she had also been crowned Miss Redford Rose after she won the beauty pageant when she was younger, that's held every year for the teenage girls of Redford. She thought she still possessed this former beauty or cheerleading skill but really now she was just a round women who's face was always red and always seemed out of breath, who had no clue what she was talking about and most practices she sat on her lawn chair with her little hand held radio sipping coffee from a flask or in the summer pimms. Everyone knew it was the cheer captains task to run the team and withhold the 'Redford Ravens' respected name, getting the squad through competitions and making sure there were strong pep rally performances and no total disasters. When I ran for captain I knew I was completely capable of running the squad efficiently, as I had been cheerleading from the age of nine and I had been in many prestige's teams, winning competitions and getting to nationals. My mom had been a great cheerleader herself when she was younger and in our old town she had coached the Junior Foresters team for the youngsters, which I had been in, the team was great and got to state finals many times. When we moved to Redford a couple of towns over from our old home when I was eleven she busted her knee and couldn't coach anymore but that didn't stop her pushing me to do it, she was my home coach and made sure everything I did involving cheer leading was perfect, she didn't care if my grades were slipping as long as my cheerleading was flawless.
Cheer practice seemed to slip past me in a haze my head not quite in it for some reason; it didn't go entirely well as one of the flyers fell after Ruby decided that she had to answer her cell phone at the moment when she was meant to helping to cradle Shelby resulting in a collapsed heap of cheerleaders and one bruised Shelby. I was just about to get in to my moms ford galaxy when Bella ran up behind me grabbing my shoulder,
"Hey wait up," she said steadying her self on the car door and then peering inside to see my mom's annoyed and curious face staring back at her, "Oh umm hi Mrs Hope I hope you are well," she said.
"I'm perfectly fine thank you," said my mom dryly making Bella slightly back away from the car.
"What was your point for stopping me Bella," I said sensing my Mom's annoyance rising as she hated being held up, even for a second.
"Oh right, yeah are you coming out tonight?" she said glancing to the side at my mom again.
"Maybe," I said hopping up in to the front seat.
"Well believe me it will be worth it," she said giving me an all knowing look.
"I'll think about it," I said shutting the door as my Mom back out of the parking lot shooting me looks.
Bella waved as we pulled out in to the traffic shaking her blonde hair out of the pony tail and then heading to her car.
"Andie are you going to come down and say hello to your sister," mom called from the kitchen where she was fixing a mushroom salad, as salad was one of the only thing's I could eat as nutrition was a vital part of my training according to my mom, who was shocked Mrs Weible didn't give out diet sheets to all the cheerleaders to make sure they weren't pumping bad toxins in to their bodies and to keep them in good shape as she put it.
"I'll be down in a second," I called back.
Paige was down for a couple of days with her fiancée Bret who was a beefy, football, jock type guy with no neck and the biggest, podgiest hands I had ever seen. Paige had always been the typical all American girl even more so than me, perfect tan, strawberry blonde hair and always sporting a pair of flip flops and an ankle bracelet.
At school she had been known for being the fun girl with the good grades, the cute boyfriend.
We were pretty close when we were younger she always used to talk to me about everything like her first time (at the surprisingly young age of 15 to a touchy feely footballer called Jake who was 17 at the time), all her fights with mom and all her problems she would share with me. She got good grades, had a fun time at high school and graduated as a popular girl. W
hen she left school mom wanted her to go to college, but she had been with Bret since junior year and she did not want to go away to college and leave him, all she wanted was to get married and settle down in a nice little house, which was so unexpected, as none of us ever thought she would be the home maker type.
Sso instead of going to college she got a job as a waitress at Nizaloni the Italian restaurant in North Forest (a town a few over from ours), her and Bret bought a little bungalow there and it was done.
Bret is the typical dumb jock, the short blonde hair, wide shoulders, and thick bands of muscle; he works at a garage fixing cars and helps out down at the racing track as well with the cars there.
When I came down the stairs Paige was already picking at a plate of salad and Bret was perched on one of the stools in the kitchen looking so out of place, as the stool was so small in proportion to him.
"Here she is," Paige said as I settled in to a stool next to her.
"Finally, I don't know what has gotten in to you lately Andie, she's always out and is not focusing on her cheerleading," said mom saying the last bit more to Paige than to me.
"Yeah how is the cheerleading going captain," she saluting me as if I was captain of some navy ship rather than a cheerleading squad.
"Ok, I guess," I mumbled taking a fork full of salad.
"Mrs Weible's still a bad coach then, or has she finally died?" said Paige.
"Paige," mom said shooting her a look from over by the stove.
"Well you know it wouldn't surprise she smokes like fifty a day."
"That is true," said Mom as she sprayed water over a dirty dish in the sink, "which is awful, setting such a bad example for you girls, smoking would do none of you any good at all, in fact it would bring down the squad,"
"Didn't she like sleep with Donny Taylor," grunted Bret, his intellectual input, as he speared one of Paige's mushrooms with a fork and stuffed it in his mouth.
"Yeah I think so," mused Paige causing Mom to shoot her another look as it was obvious she didn't approve of the topic.
The conversation soon flowed to a stop which I felt was my cue to go up to get ready for whatever Bella had planned for that night.
I rifled through my closet feeling not altogether with it, so I just picked out a tank top with little anchors printed all over it, some jeans and flip flops also grabbing a jumper in case it got cold.
I met Bella outside the twenty-four hour gas station which was also the Multi Mart the neon spelling out 'Gas' in big bright letters flickering above my head.
"Want anything?" she said as she dug some change out of her micro shorts which were barely visible.
"Yeah can I have some mentos and a diet coke," I said knowing that she was going in to get a 7up and a packet of camel lights.
Even though we hadn't been friends for very long I knew pretty much everything about Bella she was one of those people who as soon as you were her friend she let you into her life completely. So I knew her little habits, what she liked and what she didn't, and this little ritual she did before going out to a party stopping off at the Multi Mart.
I sat on the bumper of her car and watched as she flirted with the check out guy who was definitely ugly, with spots, glasses and as skinny as a rake.
We slurped down our drinks Bella topping them both up with a bit of something out of one of those mini bottles, and then we got in her car cranking up the radio as we pulled out in to the road and the evening traffic.
The party wasn't really very wild when we got there, although Bella had warned me it was a quiet one but it didn't mean we couldn't look out any prospects she said.
"Mmm yeah him over there could be ok," she said scanning the crowd as we stood by the keg.
"Yeah, maybe," I said feeling a bit dazed as I watched the tall guy with brown hair who Bella had been checking out light up a cigarette.
"Time to move in I think," she said but stopped just as she had started over to him as a girl with dyed blonde hair and a nose ring went over to him wrapping her arms around his waist.
"Ughh, that is so damn annoying" said Bella taking a swig of her drink as she came to settle down next to me again, "he could have been half decent I was even stretching as far to think summer boyfriend," she said sighing.
"I suppose, if that's what you like," I said leaning against the picnic table.
"Umm hello, is Andie in there," Bella said waving her hand in front of my eyes and blurring my vision, "he is hot! Let's go mingle; I think you need it you're looking a bit off… " she said shaking her head and dragging me off in to the crowd.
We were having a break just standing to the side of the group drinking our beers when Bella suddenly swung around and grabbed my arm,
"Oh my god," she said, "It's him, I didn't know he was going to be here!" she whispered.
"Who?" I said looking around expecting to see some sort of celebrity lurking in the shadows.
"Harry Shore! Over there by the tree," she said pointing out a boy that I seemed to recognise from somewhere, "Please tell me that even in your little bubble you've heard of Harry," she said an air of urgency in her voice.
"No, I can't say I have," I said craning my neck trying to see his face but having no luck.
"Andie! Harry Shore is hot! Wow I haven't talked to him in ages,"
"So does he have a girlfriend?"
"Not anymore, he really just tends to keep to himself. Awhile ago he used to go to some party's he was quite popular, then this new girl moved to town she was pretty but kinda mysterious no one really knew that much about her she mostly hung out with the people from Tavestock High you know on the other side of the beach, that's where Harry goes as well, anyway they got together. They looked great together, like they were two parts of the same puzzle. Then she got really ill with cancer, she had leukaemia. It was pretty sudden, but he stuck by her through her treatment and helped look after her. Eventually she got too ill and had to be put in a hospice, and then about a year and a half ago she died," she said now filling up her cup gain from the keg.
"Oh." I said still watching his back as he chatted to some tall lanky guy.
"Sad stuff happens I guess," said Bella hopping up off the bench she was sitting on and lighting up another cigarette her eyes boring in to a new guy who had just joined the party.
After a few minutes of just standing in the shadows watching as the people passed around us he finally turned around and everything clicked in to place, it was Harry from the florists. He'd seemed like such a normal guy when I talked to him like he didn't have some big back story behind him, but I guess I didn't really know him, at all.
"Come on I'm going to say hi," said Bella throwing her shoulders back as she got ready to stride over.
"Bella I thought you said you hadn't talked to him in ages," I said hesitant to go over.
"Yeah I haven't, but he doesn't have a girlfriend Andie, I mean the mourning period must be over by now, and he's gorgeous," she said and I knew there was nothing stopping her.
Bella strutted over flinging her hair a bit too wildly around her shoulders, I decided I would rather stay by the keg talking to Paul the stoner guy than have to go and stand by as Bella flirted with some guy, that I had only met once. She threw herself totally in to the mission, flirting shamelessly.
"Andie," I heard Bella whisper behind me prodding me in the back taking me out of my daze as I stared at Paul trying to decide whether he was below my standards.
She pulled me round to face her and I was disgusted by my ill judgement he really was below my standards.
" I'm going to go back and quickly get changed so I can go out to a bar with Trey and Harry," she said flipping her car keys in her hand, "so will you wait here and then I can drop you back on our way to the bar, is that ok?"
I knew there was no arguing with Bella this was not a question but a statement,
"Fine, whatever," I said plopping myself down on the bench.
"Ok, see you in about half an hour then," she said and then pushed through the crowd and disappeared.
I sat there in the dark watching the slowly party peeter out for about fifteen minutes when my phone started buzzing violently in my pocket.
"Shit this is fucking awful, god why," was the first thing I heard being mumbled angrily down the phone.
"Bella?" I said recognising her cursing.
"Andie!" she yelped as if I had caught her by surprise which was odd as she had rung me, "I have a major problem down here?"
"Oh what is it," I groaned assuming that Bella had either run out of lip-gloss or spilled something down her new shirt as they were her usual major problems.
"My cars broken down! I was just turning off Eden Drive when it just… it just cut out!"
"Oh god," I said sighing and running my hand through my hair.
"And now I have to deal with those perverted break down guys and my mom's going to kill me for getting back home after two," she moaned sighing and probably giving every passer by a sour look.
"So should I walk back?" I said preparing myself for the long walk back to my house.
"No, no it's ok I've just spoken to Trey whose still at the party with Harry he said they'd give you a lift back."
"Oh, thanks," I said glancing over to see Harry standing with a tall gangly guy who I assumed was Trey.
"It's fine, anyway I better go, and if I'm not back by the morning then just presume I've been taken away and killed by some break down guys, I'll leave it up to you to break the news to my Mom," she said in a surprisingly non jokey way.
"See you," I said and then the line went dead.
A few seconds after I put my phone away the tall gangly guy who was actually strangely ok looking sidled up to me.
"Hey, umm are you Andie?" he said sticking his hands in his pockets.
"Yeah you must be Trey."
"Yep, so I guess you just talked to Bella, sucks about her car, so I'm giving you a lift back," he said glancing anxiously over my shoulder as if I was an evil monster about to tear his head off.
"Thanks," I said waiting for him to show me to his car but instead he just stood there for a few minutes rocking backwards and forwards on his feet and jangling some change in his pocket. Eventually after those few painful minutes when in my head I was thinking of all the things I could've been doing like washing my hair or doing my nails or practising SAT words a girl rushed over to Trey grabbing him by the shoulders, she was quite short so she had to stand on tiptoes to reach his shoulders, she had long red hair and was wearing a pair of horn rimmed glasses and as she tucked her hair behind her ear I saw the long line of piercings she had down her ear.
"Sorry about that I just had to talk to Grace she has a spare ticket for a Taylor Swift concert and I really want to go!" she said excitedly.
"Umm this is Andie," Trey said slowly and making a big point of gesturing towards me.
"Oh I'm so sorry, I'm Tammie," she said sticking out a hand and I noticed that her finger nails where painted five different colors.
" Nice to meet you" I said pumping her hand for a second.
"You have amazing hair, is it natural?" she said peering at my head.
"Yes it is," I said saying more coldly than I meant as I was longing for a cup of coffee, my bed and some SAT words to go over.
"We better get off," Trey said heading over to a beaten up ford pick up.
Trey clambered in to the driver's seat his limbs flailing every where and Tammie settled in to the front seat next to him, and in the back seat amongst the empty coke cans and comic books Harry was sitting.
"Sorry for keeping you," said Tammie turning to Harry.
"No it's fine," he said helping me slide the debris off the back seat, "You really do have a lot of junk back here Trey," he said looking quizzically at a bottle of air freshener.
"I know he does, we've got to sort that out this summer," she sighed and started to press a load of buttons on the radio.
"Oh hey Harry this is Bella's friend Andie, Andie that's Harry," said Trey as he gunned the engine.
"Yeah we've met once before, you were buying flowers for your mom's friend?" he said.
"Yeah, that was me," I said feeling the flush creeping up my neck.
"I hope Bella gets her car fixed," piped up Trey.
"Who is Bella?" said Tammie shooting Trey a look.
"Just some girl, I mean Andie's friend we met her just now, you wouldn't have liked her," said Trey idly.
"Umm Trey," said Harry kicking the back of his seat.
"Oh I mean she was nice and everything, she must be a really great friend," he said to me smiling emabrassed.
"Mmm," was all I could muster at that point.
"Your seven Beech Drive aren't you?" said Trey as he changed gear roughly causing the car to judder slightly.
"Yep," I said thankful for once to see the light of my front porch.
"Oh I've always wanted to live down this road, it's so pretty and really expensive!" said Tammie excitedly, sticking her head out of the window like a dog, "Harry didn't Pearl use to live down here or near here?"
"I think so, I didn't really know her back then," he said watching me as I eagerly unclipped my seat belt so I could get ready to make a run for it.
"Thanks for the ride, I'll umm see you around sometime," I said already opening the door seconds after Trey had pulled up to the curb.
"Nice to meet you" chirped Tammie.
"Yeah see you" said Trey and Harry just nodded towards me as I turned to go in.
I watched from the hall window as they sped off down the road, Trey with one of his arms out the window, Tammie with her feet now up on the dashboard and Harry sitting in the back leaning forward to talk to them, I watched them until they turned the corner at the bottom of my street and it was silent again apart from faint murmur of the T.V. I could already place where everyone would be in the house and as always I was right, Mom was in bed, well probably lying in bed with the bed side light on reading up on the most popular interior design trends, Bret and Paige were in the snug watching the real life channel, but Paige would probably be asleep by this time which meant soon Bret would change the channel over to the sports. I always knew everyone else's habits and I always watched other people's lives and some times it got me down just watching other people's lives as if I was looking through someone's window and never having those cute couple things like Bret and Paige myself. I sighed taking one last look through the door in to the snug at Paige and Bret before heading up to my bed, which I had been awaiting all evening.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
It had been two weeks since the night when Bella's car broke down and I had to hitch a ride with the mysterious Harry Shore and his gangly friend Trey and since then I seemed to see Harry at least once a day, it was freaky. At first we just nodded and smiled at each other when we started bumping in to each other but then on about the seventh time I thought I should probably pluck up the courage to actually say something so I progressed slightly by saying "Hi, how are you?" and passing the time of day politely, but then as the bumping in to each other randomly became more frequent we started actually having full blown conversations in the middle of the grocery isle or joking about how weird it was at the coffee shop. From these coincidental encounters we had become mutual friends with the bumping in to each other as grounds for this, at first Bella shrugged it off as she knew we didn't know each other, then as they became more frequent she started getting twitchy and sarcastic like when ever I went out she would call out, "say hi to Harry for me" this was typical Bella behaviour when she had a man on her radar, but then what really tipped her over was when I started actually having conversations with Harry.
"Why does nothing look nice on me today?" Bella said dumping the tops and skirts she had just tried on in the arms of the shop assistant.
I shrugged.
"Let's go eat, Taylor's?" she asked.
Taylors was the typical American diner complete with old waitresses, milkshakes and the greasiest burger and fries ever, it was great.
"Hey look over there," Bella said as we walked into the diner, the smell of greasy food and onion rings pleasing my nostrils.
Harry and Trey and another girl were sitting at a booth in a corner and before I could even acknowledge their presence Bella was already walking over.
"Hey," Bella said shoving Trey playfully although by the look on Treys face not so playfully.
"Oh hi," Harry said.
"Mind if we join?" Bella asked already squishing into the booth.
"Oh Bella, Andie this is Pearl," said Trey after we all shifted around to make room.
Pearl was a very petite girl she was slim and small with a cute button nose and shoulder length blonde hair with a cool modern fringe and thick bangs. She was wearing a polka dot sun dress and cowboy boots; she was that type of girl who was small but feisty.
"Hi, nice to meet you," she said.
"Where's Tammie?" I asked Trey as I had found out from Harry and our grocery isle talks that they were actually dating.
"Oh she works at the library, doesn't get off till four," he said pushing his floppy hair out of his eyes.
"Are you ready to order?" drawled one of the old waitresses.
We all ordered large burgers and a variety of flavours of milkshakes, mine always strawberry.
"So you must be Andie, the girl Harry keeps on bumping in to," Pearl said.
"Yeah, that's me," I said.
I was glad for the distraction when our food came plus I was starving so I quickly dug in to my burger.
"I'm going to the bathroom," Bella said after finishing off her third diet coke, no milkshake for her.
"So Bella, man-eater or what?" Pearl giggled.
"Pearl," Harry said in a warning tone.
"Oh, I mean I wasn't being a bitch or anything," she said chirpily.
"No, its fine, I mean I'm nothing like Bella anyway," I found myself saying to a girl I had known for five minutes but I knew it was true.
"Yeah I didn't think you were, I mean for one you didn't swoon at the sight of Harry," she laughed.
"I knew Pearl wouldn't like Bella," Trey said pleased with himself.
"Mmm," she said.
"Pearl don't offend people," Harry said.
"Well I haven't offended Andie, have I?" she said looking at me with her glittering blue eyes.
"No, I'm fine," I said popping my last onion ring in my mouth.
"See she's cool," said Pearl grinning at me.
"Yeah I am," I said laughing and suddenly wishing I had friends like Pearl and Harry not one's like Bella and the other sluts.
By the time Bella came out of the bathroom after probably applying all her make-up again we were having an intense discussion about football and the gamecocks, Bella hated any sport so sat with her arms folded sighing loudly.
"You know what I actually have a really bad headache we should get back," Bella said picking up her bag.
"Well we were going back to watch the game why don't you come with us?" Pearl said and that is how I ended up sitting in the back of Pearl's old open top car as we sped down to her house to meet Tammie.
"That Bella is a bitch," Pearl called out over the music.
"Yeah I know," I said quietly which made Harry look at me quizzically.
"Lets change the subject ok," said Harry.
After talking about a load of different bands for a while we finally got to Pearls house, it was a little bungalow which backed out on to a massive field with overgrown grass and full of wild flowers. On the porch there was an old rocking chair and a hammock with some chimes bells tinkling in the wind and creepers growing up the side of the house. Inside Pearls Mom was sitting on a sofa sewing a quilt whilst her dad read the newspaper,
"Hi guys," her Mom said as she got up to give Harry a hug, "Tammie's in the yard,"
Trey and I went through to the yard after Pearl introduced me to her parents whilst Pearl and Harry stayed chatting about the florist shop.
"Hey!" said Tammie getting up off a bench with a lantern glowing beside it which faced the field and had a perfect view of the sunset.
I turned and watched the sunset to give them a little privacy as they greeted and hugged each other and then Harry came along nudging me.
"Wow it's such a pretty view of the sunset here," I said.
"Yeah, that's the reason they bought the house," he said,
"Aww that's so romantic," I cooed.
"Yeah it is."
"So have you know Pearl for ages then," I asked.
"Yeah quite a while, we've been through a lot together," he said.
I sat down on the bench with Harry and Trey, Tammie and Pearl then came and joined us.
"Oh hey you'll never guess who was at the library today!" said Tammie.
"Who?" Trey said enthusiastically.
"Do you remember last summer the guy at the pool who stalked Pearl and wrote those love poems to her!" she said laughing.
"Oh my god yeah I remember him, god he was a total freak, does he still have those purple braces?" Pearl said.
"No actually he looks a lot better, still weedy though but he's got rid of his glasses as well, but what made me really laugh was he was looking up love poems again, maybe he's planning on writing you another!"
"Ok lets not tease about that, but if he's hot then maybe I wouldn't mind," she joked.
"Ok, I said he was better but lets not stretch to saying he is hot now," said Tammie flipping her red hair over her shoulder and adjusting her glasses.
As they were all laughing about this guy they had nick named 'Sammy Stalker' I felt really out of place and as though I had intruded on their little group and just as I was about to make up an excuse to get back home Pearl settled her laughter and said,
"So what's the story behind you Andie?"
"The story, I don't think I have a story," I said although I knew I probably did.
"Oh come on you know, your back story, everyone has one."
"Well I used to live in a town over from here called Green Meadow but we moved when my Dad left," I said realising I hadn't really talked about my Dad to anyone.
"See, I told you that is some serious back story, I'm sure there's more," said Pearl lying on the grass.
"Well I've been a cheerleader since I was nine when I was in the Junior Foresters all star team which my Mom coached," I said pulling my hair in to a pony tail.
"Well then what's your back story Pearl?" I asked interested.
"Hmmm well I'm adopted, I was adopted when I was three my parents died, I have four best friends Trey, Tammie, Harry and Rosie but she's not with us anymore," she said looking up at the sky which was now speckled with stars.
After that we were all quiet for a moment until an owl hooted and it made me jump, so much so that I fell off the bench and everyone burst out laughing.
We talked for a while after that about Tammie's job at the library then about Trey's job at the surf shop and then on to the history of Harry's Mom's flower shop, but after that we all got hungry and Pearl decided to fire up the barbeque so we could have hot dogs which we did in the end though due to Trey's poor cooking skills ended up slightly burnt.
At midnight Pearl and I we sitting on the bench with lanterns scattered around the grass beside us, Harry had gone in to call his Mom and Trey and Tammie we sitting on the front porch making out.
"You know you're one of the only girls that act normally around him," Pearl said randomly.
"Around who?" I said confused.
"Harry."
"What do you mean about normal?" I said.
"You know you don't flirt shamelessly or blush when ever he says anything or swoon at everything he does," she said rolling her eyes.
"Oh," was all I could think of to answer her.
The night seemed to go by in a serene daze and we all ended up crashing outside Trey and Tammie asleep with a blanket over them in the rocking chair, me and Pearl with a blanket in the hammock and Harry on the bench. I had meant to go home but I was so comfortable in the hammock with Pearl and the humid summer night air around us like a quilt that I just stayed put. Whilst I was drifting off to sleep Pearls breathing steadying in to a snore I thought about what a leap I had taken that day with some people I hardly knew, and that was what I did that day, I leaped off the edge of the cliff that was my life, and I leapt for my life.