AN: I have never written fan fiction before and to be honest I barely even use this account anymore. But this popped into my head and wouldn't go away so I wrote it down. Then I figured I might as well publish it. So here it is. This follows cannon as of the end of episode 3x14 "Heartburn." These are just what I think Donna's thoughts might be. I recently re watched all of Suits so when I combined Donna's "You can never go back" quote in 1x12 with what we know of Donna and Harvey's past from 3x06 with the end of 3x14 in my head this is what I came up with. References events throughout the series so I would say spoilers up to 3x14 to be safe. Mostly Donna/Harvey with talk of Harvey/Scotty relationship. I hope you enjoy. Review if you feel so inclined.
And in case there was any doubt, I do not own suits. I wish.
Donna walks out of Louis' office feeling sad. She feels sad for him. And despite not knowing her she feels sad for Shelia Zass, crying in the elevator bank. Donna heads towards the elevator, intending to leave but stops before she gets there. She stops and heads back to Harvey's office. On a mission she drops her purse at her cubicle and walks right into his office without knocking. After walking straight over to his desk she picks up the phone and holds it out to him.
"Call her. Call her and apologize"
She doesn't say anything else just stares him down for a moment. He stares back before finally he takes the phone and starts to dial. She walks out of his office without another word. He doesn't say anything either. She knows that tomorrow he will demand an explanation and she will give it to him. But for tonight no other words need to be spoken. He will do what she said. Feeling better, she heads back to the elevator banks and actually gets in one this time.
/
In the cab on the way back to her apartment she starts thinking. Thinking about what she did and why she did it. Most people would not understand why she feels the need to involve herself in Harvey's relationship. She forces him to call Scotty and apologize because she knows if she doesn't he won't until it's too late. If she waits for him to do it on his own Scotty will be too angry to forgive him by the time he does. She can't let that happen, won't want be able to deal with seeing him hurt like Louis is hurt right now. It's painful enough seeing Louis, who she will now admit is her friend, hurt like that. But Harvey, no, she won't do it. She won't let him ruin this and hurt himself, not if she can stop it.
As long as she is in Harvey's life she will do whatever she has to do to stop him from ruining his own happiness. She will look after him like she always has and protect him in anyway she can. Just like he does for her. Like when he beat up Stephen. He was protecting her even if he ended up getting hurt in the process. That is what she is doing for him now with Scotty. She is protecting him even if it hurts her. She will always have his back, just like she did when she gave that evidence against Cameron to Jessica, just like she thought she did when she shredded that document. Donna will always protect Harvey. That is just how the world works.
Louis once asked her in front of Jessica, Mike, Daniel Hardman, all of the partners at Pearson Hardman, and Harvey himself if she was in love with Harvey. She couldn't answer. She said he was asking for a simple answer to a complicated question.
Rachel once asked her, in Harvey's office, why she hadn't gone there with Harvey. She said because you could never go back.
The truth is it is a complicated question because while she may not be in love with Harvey, she definitely loves him. The truth is she did go there with him, once a long time ago. And she still can't go back. She loves him and she can't go back.
They can't go back but they can go forward. And going forward for them is not together, at least not being together in the sense that it is for him and Scotty. Going forward for them is not being together, even if sometimes she wishes it was. Even if sometimes she thinks he wishes it was. Donna is not willing to risk what they have now for the slim possibility of a future together.
Going forward for them is Harvey being the best damn closer in the city and Donna being the best damn assistant in the city. And him being with Scotty while she does everything she can to make sure he doesn't screw it up. Because while Donna may love him and sometimes wish they had a future together, Scotty is in love with him and she is working hard to make sure they have a future together. And that is what Harvey wants, a future with Scotty. He may not be able to say it but Donna knows. Donna has always just known when it comes to Harvey. So Donna is going to work hard to make sure Harvey doesn't screw this up.
That is what you do when you love someone. You protect them. Even sometimes from themselves. So she will continue to protect him. And he will continue to protect her, because he does care about her. Harvey does care for her in his own way. Donna has never doubted that.
As the cab pulls up to the front of Donna's building she pays the cabby with a smile on her face. She knows he is fixing it with Scotty right now. Donna has done it again. She has once again protected him. She has once again kept him safe from himself. She has once again proved she knows him better than anyone. Donna has once again kept Harvey from screwing up his own happiness and so she smiles. All is right with the world.