I Want To Love You, Will You Let Me?

by Izzy-Lawliet

Birthday fic and AkuRoku day fic. I loved him, but he’s gone. Then he came along, wanting to get in. What did I do, did I give him the key to my heart, or did I put it in a box under key and chains?

Title: I Want To Love You…Will You Let Me?
Author: Izzy-Lawliet
Disclaimer: Yes, I own them.
Pairings: Axel/Roxas
Rating: M
Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, yaoi and--do I really have to explain what's in my M-Rated stories?

Summary: Birthday fic and AkuRoku day fic. I loved him, but he's gone. Then he came along, wanting to get in. What did I do, did I give him the key to my heart, or did I put it in a box under key and chains?

Author's Note: So my lovely friend ohxasphyxiationx wanted a birthday fic, and seeing as how it's also AkuRoku day - GO AKUROKU! – she wanted a story with Axel and Roxas, and I was more than happy and willing to do this for her.

Started: March 28th

Ended: August 12th

(Roughly 17,500 words excluding the Author's Notes.)

That's months of working on this. And it's all for Liz, cause I love her. [And note: I actually finished it in June/July, but I edited it at the last moment so I wouldn't be tempted to post it early and ruin the fact that it's a birthday fic.]

Liz – You took my soul; my heart I willingly gave to you. This story is for you, babe. Happy birthday!

xxx

"You jerk!" I screamed and pushed him away from me. Axel was being a total jerk; I mean, come on, who does that? Who says they like someone, then goes and kisses that person's best friend – let alone brother?!

"Roxy, please listen to me, I can explain!" He said, following me as I trudged back up the school steps, going to my locker. People were looking at us weirdly, I couldn't care, I always got looked at weirdly; then even more weirdly when I was with the redhead with tattoos covering most of his body – or so he says.

"I don't want to hear it." I mumbled, not giving him the satisfaction of getting to me. I walked to my locker that had a picture of me kissing him taped on it. I froze for a moment, emotions rushing through my heart as I looked at the picture longer than usual. They loved somehow getting pictures of me doing stuff with my exes. I don't care. I just rip the picture down and throw it into the trash, there's no need for me to litter. No matter how much I hate school.

"Fag!" Some jerk off coughed when I threw the paper away. I flipped him off and walked back to my locker, spinning the lock for my combination.

Opening the locker, I shoved my backpack in there and grabbed my math book and journal, only taking a few moments to look at my reflection in the mirror I hung up on the back of the door. My eyes were surrounded by dark charcoal, making the blue brighter, more so than usual. My neck had a black choker. I brushed my hair to the side, fixing the wind-swept style. My shirt was a basic shirt that had a band logo on it; it showed my stomach a little, rising just above my bellybutton. And a few inches from where it ended where my tight skinny jeans began that had cuts all along the thighs, showing more skin than not.

"Roxas!" I shut my locker and saw my twin running up—slightly awkwardly—with Riku, his perfect boyfriend.

I smiled and dropped my book and journal down on the floor so I was ready to catch my bouncy twin.

When I did catch him, he wrapped his arms and legs around me tightly, obviously ecstatic about something. "We finally did it." He whispered in my ear happily. I tightened my hold and whispered back:

"Details later."

Then I dropped him, him landing on his feat easily from practice. The first time I did that, he fell right on his ass. "Of course!" I smiled, picked up my books, and nodded to Riku, telling him through our non-existent telepathic connection: Good job.

"Hey Axel," Sora said a little shyly, still feeling awkward since Axel said that he liked him.

"Hey." Then Axel turned back to me. "Please give me a chance."

"No!" I all but yelled.

"'No' what?" Sora asked, walking over to Riku to wrap his arm around Riku's.

"Axel wants me to give him a chance to go out with him."

"You said you liked me." Sora said, innocently tipping his head to the side in confusion.

"You said what…?" I saw Riku's eyes flare with a jealous type emotion. That's what I want in a boyfriend.

"I didn't mean it. It was a crappy-half-assed-plan to get Roxas jealous, which obviously didn't work. I'm sorry, I don't really like Sora."

"Jerk." I said simply, walking away to my math class, the bell ringing once I stepped inside the room.

xxx

School ended and I was driving home with Sora in the passenger seat. "So…" I said, looking to him briefly, wanting to get all the details from him about Riku.

"So…? Oh, about Ri-Ri?!" Good God! And I'm the blond one. "Oh, well…he…I don't know where to start, Roxy."

"From the beginning, right when he took you home from school."

"Okay, well, we were driving home, and his hand was on my knee like it usually was, I was fine with that. Then all of a sudden his hand went up my leg, in my pants and he started jerking me off—I don't need to give you details because you know we've done that before." I nodded and let him continue without interrupting. "After I came, we were at his apartment and then he was in my seat, making out with me while taking off my clothes. Riku then stopped and took us up to his place, and to his bedroom.

"In his bedroom there were candles everywhere, roses on the floor, around the bed. It was so romantic; I think I shed a tear."

"Of course you did, you're the emotional one out of us two."

"Shut up, Richard."(1) I smiled when he lightly smacked me and pulled into our driveway, noticing that our adopted father's 'friend' was here. "So yeah, we lost all our clothes and he kissed every part of my body, then he…" I raised my eyebrows at him over the top of the car, taking my bag from the back seat. "Gave me head." Sora whispered. I gasped. "And I may have returned the favor." I then started to applaud my brother. "Shut up! I don't even think I was that good. It took forever to get him off. I felt bad."

"Don't. He may have been holding back. Because the longer you hold back from an orgasm, the stronger it is when it does finally happen." Sora's sigh after I said that signaled to me that he didn't believe me whatsoever.

I put my house key in the door and opened it. Vincent—our adoptive father since we were five—was sitting on the couch, talking to his blond friend, Cid.

"Hey, Dad!" I waited till he finished his conversation with Cid to interrupt. When he looked over at me, I asked, "Isn't it true that the longer you're held back from an orgasm, the better it is?" I chuckled when his cheeks turned a light shade of pink, totally easy to tell because of his vampire pale complexion.

"Ya, why ya' wanna know?" Cid answered after a while when our dad wouldn't answer.

"Oh no reason in particular, just the fact that our little Sora here lost his virginity last night." I drawled in a sing-song voice, laughing when Sora slapped my arm.

"Did you use protection?" Dad asked right away. He couldn't care what we did, as long as we weren't fucking any guy we came across and used protection.

"Dad! We were both virgins, it was safe." Sora whined.

"Okay." He then went back to being quiet.

"Now y'all go up tha stairs and stay the'," I smiled and grabbed my brother. On the way up the stairs, I grabbed the big bowl of fruits that Dad had ready for us everyday after school.

"Continue." I said through a mouth full of strawberry pieces.

"Well," He bit a piece of a watermelon. "After that, he like took his time preparing me. And-"

"How many fingers?" I just wanted to make sure he prepared Sora well enough to ensure that he wasn't in that much pain.

"Three?"

"Good. Okay, now you can continue."

"Like I was saying; he took his time, and while he was doing that, his other hand was running along my body, softly massaging every part while kissing me. I was in heaven. But I didn't know what to do. Did I touch him, where? I was so confused."

"Don't you listen to any of the advice I give you?" He shyly shook his head. He was so cute.

"Anyways, he finally pulled his fingers out of me, holding me in place by my hip while he positioned himself. I was scared, but I felt safe. I knew that it would hurt when he did finally do it, but when he did…I didn't feel anything. Well, I did, I felt love, compassion, all that good stuff and whatnot. I felt stretched, but not in a bad way." I was listening intently; I couldn't help but be interested, my first time felt just like that. "I felt complete."

"I'm happy for you." I said dreamily. I wanted that again. I wanted that bad.

"I know, ri- " There was a 'clank' against something glass like. I looked to Sora and all he did was shrug. "Anywa-" There it was again.

I got up to go to my window and opened it, taking off my screen to look down at the ground. There was Axel, with a few rocks in his hand, getting ready to throw another one.

"Axel Sinclair! What the hell do you think you are doing? Go away." I felt Sora stand next to me, leaning over the window ledge with me.

"I want to talk to you, Roxas. Please. Just give me five minutes…" I looked at my cell phone and nodded. "Well, can you come down here; I really don't want the whole neighborhood hearing what I have to say."

Sora and I backed up and had a pow-wow.(2) "Go down to him. Just hear him out."

"Shouldn't you be mad at him for lying to you and trying to get with me with a 'crappy-half-assed-plan'?"

"I'm over it."

"You're too forgiving." He smiled at me then pushed me towards the door.

"He's on his way down!" Sora yelled at an unnecessary volume before shutting the window and closing the blinds. "Put your tongue ring back in." He said, going to my jewelry box to grab one of my tongue rings. The one he brought to me was a simple ball. "Hurry." I put it in, not in the mood for arguing with him, then having to go out and arguing with Axel – my supposed best friend.

Sora shoved me out of my room and I almost tripped down the stairs because of him. I ran down the stairs, ignoring my dad and his supposed 'friend' make out on the couch, shirtless. Shudder. But at least he's finally letting someone in.

I walk out the front door and over to the lawn where my window is.

"You actually came down…" Axel said with a sexy – no, not sexy. I did not say sexy – smile.

"Yeah, although it was kinda against my will." His smile dropped and I felt immediately horrible. "But, it looks like I won't mind." I said just to get him to smile again. I don't like him not smiling; it doesn't look attractive on him.

"Wanna take a walk?" I nodded, a little reluctantly, but not letting that show. We were walking through the park, a few feet from each other. "I wanna apologize; I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"Hurt my feelings?! No, I just didn't want to hear you lie again." I scoffed.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I…" He stopped walking and pulled me to a stop, also. "Want you Roxas. In any and every way possible. I want to hold you, to kiss you; I even want to make love to you." I gasped. Every guy I've been with just wants to fuck me. Nothing special. No emotions or anything. Except him, but that was a whole different story that no one knows about. Or ever will. "But before that, I want to get to know you. Your likes, your dislikes, your favorite food, if you like dancing in the rain. Will you let me?"

I slowly nodded my head, not even realizing that I just did that.

He smiled.

The walk through the park ended in no time. He told me everything, all his feelings, how he felt, and how he's been trying to subtlety hint that he's liked me since we were twelve. I was a little embarrassed at that. I kind of prided myself on not being the oblivious out of me and Sora, that's his job to be oblivious to everything. I mean, come on, it took him just as long to realize that Riku liked him as more than a friend.

When we were walking home, Axel walked a little closer than he did while walking to the park. It wasn't awkward, just not expected.

I walked along my lawn, going to the door with Axel by my side. When we got there we stood there for a few moments. I don't know why I didn't go inside. I really didn't; I was waiting though. For what? I don't know. Maybe I wanted him to kiss me. Either way, I didn't move. And neither did he.

But then, he leaned down, his hands lying on my waist, mine going to his shoulders for some reason. His lips brushed mine, much like they did earlier today, but this time it was willing on my part as well. About right as our lips touched, our mouths opened and my tongue entered his mouth. When his tongue started to move with mine, I felt his mouth vibrate as a moan slipped from his throat.

A few more seconds of kissing and we both pulled away, completely breathless. Our eyes were locked and I could see a smirk among his lips. "I didn't know you had a tongue-ring," He said.

"Yeah, I don't like having it in all the time; it impairs me while I eat."

"But why'd you have it in now?" Axel asked, pulling me closer to his body. My neck was arched at an almost uncomfortable angle. His hips gyrated into mine, causing friction to start. "Did you expect to kiss me?" I shook my head and looked down at the ground. "Well, I liked it." And he caught my lips again, moaning when his tongue brushed up against the cool metal in my mouth. Why did Sora make me put the tongue ring in?

His hands went down to my ass, squeezing then releasing, but pressing our fronts together while doing so. I stopped responding to the kiss and pushed off of Axel. "What's wrong, Rox?"

I shook my head and stepped back from him, going to the door which was unlocked. "I'm not easy…" Anymore, I added in my head. "You have to work for it…" Yeah 'cause that doesn't seem sleazy, I mentally cursed myself.

"Sorry," He said right away, his eyes portraying guilt. "I wasn't thinking, I won't do it again, I promise." And with that he smiled widely and stepped towards me once more, and instead of kissing my cheek or lips, he grabbed my hand, bowed slightly, and pressed a gentle kiss to my knuckles. Doing all this while looking me in the eyes.

xxx

Progressively over the summer, Axel started hanging with the group more and more. He was starting to worm his way into my heart, and I didn't like it. At all. It made me think of how easily I let him in. Not that I'm complaining, I'm glad I gave my heart to him, but I think when he…he never really gave it back.

Axel's arm was usually always draped over my shoulder, or his hand on mine or lying innocently on my knee. None of his touches brought any sexual feelings, and I think that's how he meant it. He took what I said to heart, and that made me feel…what's the word? I don't know, but I liked how he made me feel, even though I hated it at the same time. I know I'm confusing, get over it.

Right now, we were all in the back of Cid's—who is now Dad's boyfriend—truck on our way to some place that Cid didn't tell anyone, just that we all had to dress up nicely. Or else. Don't ask me what the 'else' is.

I was sitting under Axel's arm with his jacket wrapped around me. He and Riku were wearing three piece suits—don't ask—while Sora and I were simply wearing dress pants and different colored button-down silk shirts; mine emerald, Sora's a dark blue. Our Dad was wearing the same thing, his shirt being a deep red color, matching his eyes. Cid was also wearing a suit. He looked weird.

I had not only my tongue ring in, but my lip ring too. My eyes were again surrounded by black eye-liner, but I left out the eye-shadow this time, thinking of my dad while doing so. When I had walked out of my room, Axel was so shocked to see my lip ring. I just simply smiled and walked past him with Sora, who looked normal—or as normal as someone as weird as him can.

Cid pulled the black truck into a nice looking place. It had valet parking and everything. Riku and Axel jumped out of the truck right away, holding their hands out for us to take. Sora and I looked at each other before we each grabbed their hands; Riku for me and Axel for Sora. We laughed at their confused expressions and went back to who we were supposed to be with, Sora giving a kiss to Riku's cheek to make him feel better.

I turned to Axel to kiss him on the cheek too, but he had his arm held out for me to take. I bit my lip and furrowed my eyebrows, but took his arm either way. Axel leaned towards my ear, his hot breath sending shivers down my spine. "Don't worry about it." I nodded and kissed his cheek anyway while he was backing away. When we walked into the better light, I noticed that he had pink staining his cheeks, giving away that he was blushing.

We walked into the restaurant, and Cid went to the podium where some guy with a weird mustache was standing. "Reservation for Highwin'." His hand was around my dad's waist possessively, it made me smile.

"Table for six. Right this way, sir." We all glared at how his spat out the word 'sir', but followed him. And as we were all sitting down, the guy had the nerve to give Axel a weird look, his eyes going to the tattoos on his face and the ones that were showing on his forearms—Axel's sleeves were folded up, and I still had his jacket, I forgot to take it off when we got inside—then glance at my piercings.

When the guy walked away, Axel pulled out my chair for me and took my—his—jacket, draping it on the back of his chair. When I sat, I noticed that Axel, Riku, and Cid did that for my family. I blushed after I shared a knowing look with Sora and my father. We all got it. We were the chicks in the relationship…

Sitting down, we all received our menus and noticed that there were no prices and all the writing was in some unknown language to all but Cid.

"What'd y'all starin' for?! Pick somethin'!" Cid said, going back to his menu. I looked to Sora and our semi-existent telepathic connection screamed: What the hell?!

Minutes later, some waiter came back, asking for our drink and food orders. "If you don' pick, I'll pick for y'all." Cid said, no malice in his voice, but with a smile. He started talking to the waiter in fluent whatever-the-hell-this-language-was. I looked at my dad and he seemed surprised, and his eyes softened. "I hope y'all like what I got ya."

"I didn't know you spoke Italian." My dad said almost quietly, much like he usually did when we were in public. "You never mentioned it."

"Uh," Cid rubbed the back of his head nervously. "I was born in Italy, there until I was fifteen…" All of us made, 'ohhhh'-ing noises.

"I didn't even know you were Italian." Dad blushed when Cid reached his hand over on top of his.

"Yeah, just not somethin' that comes up in everyday conversation…" We, teenagers, glanced at each other awkwardly, trying to ignore the creepy looks that Dad and Cid were sending each other.

"So, Riku…" Axel started, his hand squeezing mine slightly. I shifted my eyes downward towards my hand and noticed that Axel really was holding it. How had I not noticed before? "You did a great job at the game the other day." Oh, great, a topic I knew nothing about.

"Thanks, with Sora now on the varsity cheer team, I had to win." Sora blushed. He may have willingly joined the male cheerleaders, but that didn't mean he wasn't embarrassed about it.

"I saw that, when did you try out Sor?"

"Uhm…before school ended, but we only found out before the last game who made the team…and I guess I made it." Sora's voice was timid and soft, much like Dad's. Sora's eyes caught mine, and I could tell he was praying that I would divert the conversation away from him.

"Didn't you have to wear a girl's uniform? The rumor was that they didn't have your size." Axel teased, obviously having fun making Sora blush.

"I thought it was sexy. And he still has the uniform…" Riku trailed off, giving Axel a wink and a sly grin that Sora missed. Unfortunately, I didn't. Axel returned the smirk with one of his own and high-fived Riku over the table, getting Sora's attention this time.

"What?" Sora said in a child-like voice that just screamed innocence. It was adorable!

"Nothing, my love," Riku said in a silky voice that got me all hot. I blushed in reaction to it and how Axel chuckled and poked my side, getting my attention. I blushed a deeper color and ignored the worried look that I glimpsed from Sora.

"You think that's hot?" Axel said quietly, loud enough for Riku to hear, but not Dad or Cid, and Sora just wasn't paying attention. I didn't realize right away that Riku was listening, so I nodded. Axel glanced over at Riku, but I was too busy blushing to notice. Axel then leaned over to me, his mouth nearing my ear and he whispered, "If you're turned on that easily, then this could get fun." I gasped and visibly shivered at his husky voice. I pushed him away lightly, turning a bright shade of red.

"Roxy? You okay?" Riku asked, feigning innocence when I knew he knew exactly what was wrong.

I was at dinner with my dad and his boyfriend.

In a fancy restaurant.

And I had a freakin' hard-on.

xxx

At home, Cid told us to leave the house for the night. So I was in the middle of packing an overnight bag along with Sora. He was going to Riku's, and I was going over to Axel's, willingly. I didn't want to go anywhere really, but then again I didn't want to be here when Cid and my dad…ew. I'm going to stop that train of thought…

"Do you think we'll do it again?" Sora asked out of the blue. I knew immediately what he was talking about.

"You may have to hint to him. Be subtle though, even though I know it isn't your forte." I grabbed my make-up and threw it into my bag, along with my toothbrush and hair comb.

"How? I mean, do I…grr! I don't know…" Then Sora collapsed onto the ground, holding his head in his hands. I dropped what I was holding and fell to the ground with him, running my hands through his hair when he put his head on my lap. Before I could even ask what was wrong, he started, "I don't think Riku really enjoyed making love to me…"

"What makes you say that? If he didn't like it, he would have broken up with you. He obviously loves you and cares about you a lot."

"How can you tell, Rox?" His eyes fell shut as he lay on his back. The door started to creak open silently and in stepped Riku. Speak of the devil.

"The way he looks at you, holds your hand, and how he'll simply kiss you in the middle of a crowded restaurant. He did that because you were so obviously thinking he was ashamed of you, when you shouldn't think that. You are so blond sometimes. I swear."

"Okay, he may love me, but who says he loves the sex?"

"Excuse me?!" Sora bolted up and looked frantically at Riku. "I loved the sex." Riku got down on his knees in front of Sora and held his face in his hands. "What makes you think that I don't love being with you?"

"It…" Sora tried, but not being able to get anything out.

"He says it took you forever to come; he thinks that's a bad thing." I answered for him while finishing up my bag.

"God no! I just didn't want the feeling to end. You make me feel like nothing else. I wanted it to last forever." Riku said softly, running his thumb across Sora's cheek. I smiled at the sight and zipped up my bag. I was all ready. And to give them both some privacy, I left the room and went downstairs.

"Oh god!" I shielded my eyes and continued to shriek occasionally before calming down and staying quiet, still too shocked to move.

My dad…was being sucked off…by an almost naked Cid…

"We're decent…" I heard my father's monotone voice say.

I slowly uncovered my eyes, ready to cover them back up if needed. Luckily, I didn't have to, for they put their clothes back on and sat on the opposite sides of the couch. "The least you can do is wait till we leave the house before you guys start doing it."

"I'm sorry, Roxas. Are you and your brother leaving now?" Dad asked, and when I looked at him, his cheeks were dark red.

"I am. Bye." I walked to the door and opened it, and just before I shut it, I hollered back, "Don't be a fool, wrap your tool!"

"Roxas Strife-Valentine!" I smiled and jogged out to Axel and his bike.

"What was that about?" Axel asked and nodded his head to the house, since in his hands were two black helmets.

"Oh, nothing!" I said in a sing-song voice and slipped my backpack over both shoulders before straddling the bike, wrapping an arm around Axel's waist, the other reaching for the helmet.

"Seems like this isn't your first time on a bike…are you experienced in riding?" I chuckled at the innuendo.

"You shall have to wait and see." Axel smirked and turned around, slipping on his own helmet before starting up the engine. I sighed in content. The sound of the engine was so relaxing; it was so…I can't explain it. It reminded me of something…like from long ago… "Hey Ax, what kind of bike is this?"

"Wow…never had anyone really interested in Charlotte." He said, running his hands along the handles. I could tell by the tone of his voice that he really cared for this bike.

"She's very beautiful. So…what type?"

"Not sure." I laughed. "She was a special type of bike, only two of her exists." So it is possible that I have ridden one like this before. "You ready, my love?" I blushed at the name and wrapped my other arm around him after putting on the helmet and securing it. "Hold on tight." I nodded against his back and laid my head on the space between his shoulder blades.

The bike roared to life once more as he revved it and sped off, easily manipulating it to go where he wanted it to. Turning was smooth. Riding was smooth. And even accelerating was smooth. I was impressed; he really did know what he was doing.

I sat up and looked around; we were surrounded by trees, obviously out of town. I wonder where we're going…

"Don't worry, doll face, my place is just up ahead." I started to panic when I heard his voice, only relaxing when he spoke again. "I put intercoms in the helmets." (3)

"Sweet idea."

"Thanks, love." I blushed, thanking god that he couldn't see me. I always felt embarrassed when he called me something like that.

Not two minutes later of speeding down the road, I saw a large mansion up ahead; one that kids from school were convinced was haunted. It looked beautiful at night. It was lit up and there was a waterfall in front of the main entrance, with lights occasionally flickering in the water.

I thought I was surprised when I saw it, just imagine how surprised I was when Axel pulled up to the gate, punching in a code and then sped through the metal bars. I started to release my arms, noticing how we were slowly pulling into a garage. Inside there were many expensive cars. I saw two Lamborghini's, one Ferrari, and two mountain jeeps. Off to the side there were at least seven expensive looking motorcycles, then adding this one to the bunch caused the others to look like crap.

"Impressive, huh?" Axel asked, removing his helmet and reaching for mine, hooking them up on the wall.

"That doesn't even begin to explain it…" I was still looking in awe at all the vehicles.

"Well, this is just one garage; we have two more behind the house." I gaped at him, trying to come up with something to say. When I couldn't think of anything, I closed my mouth and followed him as he headed up the stairs into the main house.

Walking through the door, music assaulted my ears right away, blasting from the walls like no tomorrow. I saw Axel look back at me with a sympathetic expression and then walked to the wall, dropping my hand. He lifted a cover on a black box and punched in a code. The music turned down right away, just till it was a simple whisper.

"Sorry, I didn't think he-" He was interrupted.

"Ax! You home?!"

"Yeah, in here, Dad." I looked at Axel questioningly when he walked up to another redhead that looked like him and embraced him in a hug. "You weren't supposed to be back till the end of next week."

"And miss your birthday?!" Axel's…birthday?

"But we decided that we would celebrate it when you got back, since it was today." No!

"As if! It's not everyday August thirteenth comes around." (4) Holy crap. I can't believe I didn't know it was his birthday. I've known him for how long, and yet every year I forget his birthday…I'm a horrible friend. My gasp alerted Axel's dad that I was here, and he looked at me with a wide smile upon his face. "And this is Roxas. Nice to meet you," He said and shook my hand.

"How do you know who I am?" I asked, it not being the only question that was currently on my mind.

"Axel's told me all about you. Never stops really. No matter what, he'll describe everything you wear and whatnot. It's quite adorable how he's infatuated with you."

"Dad!" I chuckled at Axel's pained and embarrassed tone.

"What, Ax? It's true, you are infatuated with him. I can understand, I mean look at those eyes, they're just as bright as you said they were." I blushed and averted my gaze to my shoes. They were very interesting. "And he's easily embarrassed, too. He's perfect. Roxas, I'm Reno, Axel's sexy beast of a father." He held his hand out and I took it, shaking it timidly. "But, you said he wasn't shy…"

"I'm usually not," I said, finally finding my voice. "I just rarely get compliments from everyone—bar my brother, his boyfriend, and your son." I looked up from the ground and gasped at how much they really looked alike.

My gasp caused Reno to chuckle and step back, going back to Axel's side. He draped his arm over his son's shoulder. "So, what's on the agenda for tonight?" Axel asked, smiling at me.

"Nothing much, I just made a cake and got you some presents, you know the usual." Reno replied, walking away and into another room.

"Ooo, what kind of cake?" Axel asked, jumping on the balls of his feet.

"Only your favorite!" That caused Axel to make a very girly squeal sound, making me look at him funnily.

Axel chased his dad into the other room, only to be surprised at a bunch of people jumping out and yelling, "Happy Birthday!" His face lit up like Christmas morning and I couldn't help but smile myself, even though I felt horrible that I didn't know it was his birthday.

"Guys! What are you all doing here?!" I only knew like two or three people here. There was Saϊx—his older brother—and Larxene, one of my ex-best friends. Larxene's blue eyes found mine, and I looked away, back to Axel's smile and the others giving him hugs.

But when my eyes met with Saϊx…I froze in my place, not being able to look away from the hurt and depression in his eyes that caused my own feelings to surface and my eyes begin to water. His becoming the same.

I finally had enough courage to look away, but I accidentally met Axel's, whose eyes were filled with worry. He opened his mouth to say something just as Reno clamped his hand on my shoulder. "Hey, Rox, I wanna talk to you." I looked up at him oddly. "How 'bout you come up with me." He didn't give me a choice; instead he pulled me up the stairs and into what I'm assuming is the master bedroom. Reno then ignored me and walked to these great double glass doors and opened them, stepping out onto a large balcony. I sat on the bed and propped my backpack against it.

"Tell me what's going on. When Axel mentioned you around Saϊx, he excused himself, and when I found him, he was in the bathroom, crying his eyes out. I don't know if you actually knew him, but he's not one to cry.

"So, either you tell me why talking about you caused him so much pain, or I will cause you ten times the pain you've caused him, and I will enjoy it." I looked up, my eyes focusing on Reno's back as he leaned on the railing, his hands fidgeting with something.

"I didn't hurt Saϊx…" I said, then continued when Reno growled. "Not directly at least, I didn't mean to…"

"Then, what?" Reno turned around, still leaning against the metal.

"I used to date his brother…" I couldn't say his name, every time I did; it brought tears to my eyes and froze up my vocal chords.

"Zexion?! But…he's-" I cut him off before he could say the word that would tear up my heart once again.

"I know…but before that. He and I were inseparable. We met when I went to go spend a summer camp. He said he couldn't live without me, and I said the same…but, then Demyx transferred camps. He and I befriended him right away. Demyx ended up falling for him…" I hoped Reno understood everything I said without making me say his name to clarify it. "And so did he. I started to become the third wheel, even though it was me that was going out with…him and not Demyx.

"I got mad that he wasn't paying much attention to me, so I left the park that we were hanging out at, and left him alone with Demyx."

"They said he was beaten." I nodded.

"From what I heard, they were attacked and gangbanged. I got a call from Saϊx, telling me they were in the hospital, but by the time I got there, Demyx died, with you-know-who holding his hand and kissing him. I was shocked, but I understood.

"Right before he…I held his hand, kissing him. He had said to me, 'I may not have loved you in the end, for my heart was taken from you to him, but know that I will always care for you.' When I asked why he wasn't in such a bad condition, he said that was because Demyx took most of everything, protecting him as much as possible…but apparently that wasn't enough. For you-know-who…y'know….right after I had said, 'I love you'." Tears were pouring down my cheeks; I couldn't stop the racking of my body.

"If only I had stayed." I said, blaming myself. Because, in truth, it really was my fault they were…killed. It was my fault that I lost my first love…my fault!

"You can't blame yourself." Reno walked over to me, laying whatever he was holding in his hand on the side table. "It isn't your fault." I nodded and fell into his arms. I know that I barely knew Reno, but I just wanted and needed comfort. "Let's go back down, if you're ready, or you can just stay up here…" I nodded. I mean, I didn't really want to see Saϊx and his depressed self again. "Okay, I'll send Axel up when everyone heads home."

"Should I move to Axel's room?" Surely Axel wouldn't sleep in the master bedroom.

"This is Axel's. Think I would give him the master?! Ha! As if." Then he walked out, shutting the door with a small smile.

I stood up and walked around the room, looking at all the band posters and concert t-shirts hanging on the wall. There were also a couple of frames of Axel standing with his father. Inside the frame, there were pictures shoved in the corner of them, pictures of me and Sora and Riku and Axel, some just Sora and Axel. And even of just me and Axel. Some of the pictures were taken years ago, before any of us started liking anyone. Just the thought that Axel saved all these pictures and kept them in plain sight, caused me to smile thoughtfully.

I sat on Axel's bed, climbing into the middle after kicking off my shoes. I snuggled under the unmade covers and laid my head on the fluffy pillows.

xxx

"Roxas? Roxy? Wake up, honey." I groaned and slowly opened my eyes, noticing that there was silver light coming in from the half of the moon that was showing. "Hey there, beautiful." I blushed but kept my eyes locked with Axel's green eyes. I noticed he was slowly leaning down, eventually only hovering just above my lips. He didn't move forward, nor did he move back. He just stayed positioned where he was.

I flicked my eyes to his sitting stance and noticed that he had one arm over me, laying by my torso and his body was almost lying on top of mine. When my eyes went back up to his, they had a gleam in it that I couldn't help but blush more at. Axel's eyes seemed so…possessive.

And I have to say…

I liked it.

When he didn't move anymore, I lifted my lips to his, pressing them together with his in a forceful manner, hoping he got the message that I wanted to kiss him. Now. I guess he did, because I felt the bed shift a little and all of a sudden he was on top of me, kissing me with passion. I couldn't even move my hands—planning on running them through his hair—for he pinned them down on the bed, moving his lips to bite harshly at my own before moving down and nibbling roughly on my jawbone.

I arched up against him, loving when he moaned against my throat and it sent tingles spreading throughout my body, making me moan myself. His hands were going down my arms, down my sides, then to my hips were he started to finger the hem of my shirt. I didn't stop him. So he must have taken that as a sign to continue, and lifted my shirt up, letting his hands wander across my stomach and chest where he caused goose bumps to rise. I couldn't stop moaning as his fingers started to tweak my nipples and his lips continuously left marks along my skin.

I know I said that I wouldn't do this again, but he was just making me feel so good. I couldn't help it. I loved this feeling of being dominated.

"Roxas…" Axel mumbled against my skin. "You should stop me." I shook my head and arched up to him even more, bucking my hips to meet the hardness that was there. "Don't. If you don't want to do this, you have to tell me now."

"I…" Did I want him to stop? I wanted, no needed, to have that dominance from someone else, but it was obviously too soon. "I don't want to stop." I mentally cursed myself. I did want to stop, but apparently my mouth disagreed with me and said what it wanted to.

What I said caused Axel to growl and once again claim my mouth, his hands pushing up my shirt as far as he could before he broke the kiss and pulled it off. I kissed him again with just as much passion as he showed me and didn't let up, not even when he removed his own shirt and started working on my bottoms. This was moving fast, but I didn't really care…

Minutes later and I was undressed, Axel still in his boxers. It seemed as though he was worshipping my body. He kissed me everywhere, running his hands over sensitive parts of my body that caused me to moan loudly. His teeth were currently nibbling along the hair under my navel that led downwards. His hands were parting my thighs further apart as he laid in between them, his hands going to two different places. One was now on my member, pumping it slowly, while the other went downwards to circle my entrance which sent multiple shivers through my body. I moaned when my hips subconsciously bucked in two different directions; up into Axel's hand that was around my erection, and down onto his finger that now entered me, making me moan even more.

"That's it, Roxas. Moan for me," Axel said, kissing back up to my body and landing at my lips. I did as he asked and moaned louder, arching my back as he started to enter another finger, curling them once they were both inside me. Moving them a bit more, Axel was able to hit the spot that caused me to arch off the bed till only my shoulders and heels were the ones touching the mattress, yelling at the top of my lungs.

It's been three years since I have gotten that feeling of actually being wanted. Axel actually cared about my pleasure, and didn't mind that he hadn't given me that ultimate pleasure by some odd chance, but because he wanted to. That alone gave me pleasure. That added on to Axel sucking on my neck, his fingers thrusting in and out, plus his hand around my cock…mm, I just about came.

"Come, Roxas." Axel's voice was by my ear, nibbling on the cartilage before biting roughly, making me yell out his name as I finally did as he said to. "That's it." He said softly, still moving both his hands and licking at my ear. My breathing was erratic and my eyesight was a bit fuzzy. "Breathe, love." Axel continued to whisper, moving his hands and body away from mine to pull the blanket up around us.

"It's hard." I said.

"Oh, it was." Axel laughed while cuddling up next to me.

"Shut up, Richard." I pushed weakly at him before curling into him, feeling something press into my leg. "Wait, what about you?" I asked, sitting up and looking at him with wide eyes.

"I'm fine." I shook my head at him and pulled off his boxers before he could protest anymore. I kissed down his body, tracing tattoos slowly with my tongue, getting to his erection in no time. I ran the flat of my tongue against his base, going to his tip in a slow movement, loving the way he gasped. I did it a few more times before wrapping my mouth around the base and slid it to the end where I slowly took it into my mouth, moaning as I did so, feeling Axel's hand entwine in my hair as I slowly started to bob my head, going down as far as I could. I gagged once but pushed through it. When I realized I couldn't this soon, I pulled back completely; playing with his slit. When I did, his hand pulled my hair and I have to say, I didn't mind it. His moans were completely incoherent all but for my name passing through his name every few moments when I did something that I knew gave him more pleasure. I slowly played with the tip, taking it into my mouth and sucking lightly, using my teeth to lightly scrape against the sensitive skin.

"Oh! Roxas!" Axel yelled right before he spilled down my throat. Once again, I didn't mind. I swallowed everything and then pulled back, lightly kissing his softening length once more and running my tongue against it gently, chuckling, while pulling back, at Axel's inward groan. I then noticed that his hips still rolled once he was done, and it looked like it wasn't of his own accord. Although, it eventually stopped. "Come up here now." I followed his demand and curled up to him, bringing the blanket back up over us. "Thank you, darling."

"Don't thank me, I liked doing it." Axel raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything.

xxx

In the morning I woke up to the smell of bacon and hash browns and eggs. I didn't want to move, I was comfy where I was, and I didn't know why, but Axel wasn't sleeping next to me anymore. Which was gay, 'cause he was very warm. Opening my eyes slowly, I saw Axel sitting on the edge of the bed with a plate of food in his hands. "Morning, starshine, the earth says hello!" I laughed and took a piece of bacon off the plate and shoved it in my mouth, wiping my hands on the blanket. "Hungry?" I nodded. "I don't see why, I mean, I thought you had enough last night." I scoffed, but still didn't say anything as I reached for the plate.

"Thank you." I said, scooping some hash browns up with the intricately designed fork, cringing when the fork accidentally scraped against the glass of the also nicely designed plate. "Wow…you're rich."

"Yeah…so I've noticed." Axel said, looking away as though he was ashamed of it.

"Why don't you show it off, I mean, why hang out with me and Sor when you can buy your friends and hang out with richer people."

"I tried that once, they were only in it for my money, expecting me to buy them things. Without you and Sora knowing, I didn't have to deal with you guys asking for things like that."

"Sora and I would never ask you for things. We weren't raised like that. Dad taught us to appreciate all our friends equally, rich or poor." He smiled sweetly at me and reached for a piece of my bacon. I slapped his hand away. "He also taught us to protect what we love."

"Gasp! You love your food more than me? I'm insulted!" He held his hand against his chest and made his eyes water, a look that I knew he had practiced and mastered.

"Yeah, especially when it's this good. Who cooked it?"

"Dad and me."

"Well it's delicious! I must go down and thank him this instant." I put the now finished plate down and hopped out of bed, bending down to grab my clothes out of my bag. Axel moaned and came up behind me, laying his hands on my waist.

"You could thank me right now…in a certain way." I smiled and pressed back against his growing erection and then moved away.

"Maybe later," He groaned and I laughed. "Now, where's the bathroom?" I asked, deciding to grab my whole bag so I could take a shower.

"That door," he pointed to one to the left of the bed that was also next to another door. "The one on the right is a closet, the other is the bathroom. Take your time, when you're done, page me." I raised my eyebrows. "Right there," Axel then pointed to an intercom next to the bed on the table that I somehow missed the night before. "The code is 813(5) to get the kitchen, where I'll be cooking with my dad and his boyfriend." I nodded and went to the bathroom, still naked.

xxx

The shower had been more than relaxing and finding the kitchen, more than confusing. Axel had given me directions, and offered me a guide, but I refused. And when I did find it I was exhausted. I walked into the kitchen, facing the backs of three men and sat at tone of the stools, sighing loudly in exhaustion. There was chuckling before I heard the sound of glass being laid on the marble countertop where my head currently rested.

"Tired?" Reno asked when I lifted my head a mumbled a quiet thanks while bringing the plate of more delicious food closer to me. "From what Axel was telling me…you should be." I blushed fifty different colors and glared at Axel, who was clearly avoiding eye contact. "You're so cute." Blush. "Anyways, this is my boyfriend, Cloud." My head snapped up at the name and I looked at the guy with some of bluest eyes ever.

"Roxas…" I gasped as some part of me recognized his voice. I saw he was about to say something, but my phone rang instead.

"Hello?" My voice was obviously distanced.

"Hello, Roxas." It was Dad. "I was wondering when you were going to come home today, it's already 12:30."

"Uhm…" I held up a finger and walked out of the room. "Dad, what was my real Dad's name?"

"I told you, Cloud Strife. Why?" If only he knew.

"Because he's waiting in Axel's kitchen for me."

He didn't say anything after that, I wouldn't blame him. I mean, him and Dad were a couple, then one day Cloud left Sora and me at Dad's place and never came back. He was in shock. It was understandable. "What did he say?"

"He just knew my name."

"Okay." Then he hung up. I shouldn't be surprised that he did, but I was this time because this was a very important matter and he just avoided it. I closed my phone and walked back into the kitchen, not being able to take my eyes off Cloud's.

"Roxas…"

"Is that all you can say?" I was mad. Don't ask why. "You abandon Sora, Dad, and me eleven years ago, and all you can say is my name?!" I turned and walked out of the kitchen, going god only knows where. I ended up outside somehow, in a garden of some sort. I got a call from Axel, but I ignored it. The first time that is. When my phone started to ring for the fourth time, I answered it. "What?"

"Where are you?" His voice was obviously filled with worry.

"In the garden." Then I hung up, and continued to walk along the path with large trees surrounding it.

"Roxas?!" Axel came down a path and I saw him running towards me. I stood waiting, staring at my shoes. "What happened in there?" I shook my head. "How do you know him?"

"He's my father." Not dad, which would be an insult to Vince.

"How, I thought Vincent was?" That's comical.

"Do we look anything like him?" I looked up and Axel was shaking his head, "He was Cloud's boyfriend at the time, then one day, he left without telling anyone. Now, he's with your dad. Bastard," The last bit was muttered to myself. And no, it wasn't about Reno, it was towards my own father.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know…but Cloud's been with us for almost ten years…" That fits. "I mean, I guess he looks like you, you more than Sora. Your eyes, your hair…and he always reminded me of you."

"How?" By now, I was semi-calm and Axel was walking me back to the house.

"When he's mad…he does what you do. And your laughs are the same too." He's observant. I voiced this and he started laughing. "Yes, it's what I get for being forced to be friends with someone I love."

I don't think he heard what he said…

"You love me?" I asked, too shocked to keep walking.

"Yeah," Wow…no hesitation at all… "How can I not love you?" Then he just kept walking, taking my hand to get me to follow. "Okay, we're gonna go up to my room, get your things, then say bye to my dad and Cloud so we can take you home." I didn't reply.

When we got back to Axel's room, I was grabbing my bag when I was literally attacked form behind. Axel's hands were on my hips and when I stood up, he attacked my neck, biting and sucking along different spots.

"Axel…what the hell?" I moved my hand to go behind Axel's head and entwined it through his soft hair.

"When you bent over, it reminded me of earlier. And, mm, yum-my­." I laughed, and tried to push him away, but failed horribly as he continued to suck on that spot beneath my ear that my jawbone started. It was so good. And his hands were under my shirt, deftly rubbing the skin that was below my hip bone. "Now we must go," He whispered in my ear and pulled away, causing me to groan out of annoyance.

"You're gay!" I pouted and walked around him, attempting to find the stairs.

"This way, love." He pulled me the opposite way I was going and next thing I know, we were going down the stairs.

"Don't you ever get lost?"

"Nope, I used to when I was a kid, so much, that Dad had to put a locater type thing on my earring. I still have it." He pointed to a star shaped earring that hung from the cartilage; it was red and nicely designed. "I keep it with me because…well, I don't know, I just do."

"It looks cool. And now that I think about it, I've never really seen you without it." He nodded and took me into a living room type thing where Reno sat with Cloud's hand in his. "Hey, I'm gonna take Roxy home, I'll call you when I know I'm gonna be home."

"Okay, bye Axel, Roxas." I muttered a good-bye and was grateful when Axel took us to the garage and grabbed some keys off of a hook. He paused and hung them back up.

"What do you wanna take?" I paused myself and took a look at all the vehicles.

"Can I ride by myself on Charlotte?" I immediately regretted my question when all he did was gape.

"Sure you can handle her?"

"Yeah, positive." He took some keys out of his pocket and hesitantly handed them to me.

I walked towards her and straddled her, thanking Axel when he handed me a helmet. "I'm gonna take Bob, just follow me, okay?"

"Bob?" I asked through the intercom while securing the helmet on my head.

"Reno and I aren't good with names…" I laughed and started up Charlotte, loving how she felt under me…and no that wasn't meant to sound wrong…

I slowly pulled out of the garage behind Axel, seeing another bike that looked just like Charlotte. "It's Fenrir, Cloud's." That was all I needed – or wanted – to know. Axel sped down the road with me right behind him. I wasn't using much gas, but I easily sped in front of him, glancing back to see how far Axel was behind me. "Slow down, love. You're going to fast." I laughed at Axel's voice; the intercoms making it seem like he was right next to me.

"But, you seem like the kinda person who likes it fast."

"Maybe, I'd never know."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm a virgin." I hit the break and turned around, making the bike tilt dangerously close to the ground. But I knew what I was doing. I stopped in the middle of the road and waited for Axel to come to a stop in front of me. I got off the bike and pulled off my helmet, laying it on Charlotte. "What?" His tone was slightly irritated, obviously trying to hide his embarrassment when he reached me.

"How in fucking hell are you a virgin?!" I exclaimed, waving my arms wildly.

"I…" I didn't let him continue.

"You're now eighteen! I lost my virginity at fourteen! And you still have yours?! Holy fucking shit!" I paced back and forth, feeling restless for some reason.

"I was fuckin' waitin' for you." He replied testily, green eyes narrowing slightly but his lips upturned in a smirk. "Call me selfish, but if I was gonna do anything with anyone I'd want it to be you, ya know? So don't get all surprised and shit because of that."

We stared at each other, standing in the middle of the road like two idiots. I couldn't say anything and I knew he wouldn't. If the look on my face was any sign for him of how I felt, needless to say I was shocked. He was waiting for me? But that can't be right! When I finally found my voice, I piped up with, "You'rea crazy man. I mean, what led you to believe that we would even get to where we are now. I may have never fallen for you; I could be with someone else, never thinking about you like that. Would you continue to wait for me? Would you stay a virgin?"

His smirk grew when he answered.

"Hell yeah. If it wasn't you, it wouldn't be worth it." And that snapped something in the back of my mind. If that was true, then would that mean..?

"You want me to be your first?"

"I want you to be my last, Roxy."

xxx

"I wanna meet him." Sora's childlike voice announced in the dead silence that had overcome the family and our boyfriends.

"Why?! He's a fucking bastard; he left us!" I exclaimed, feeling angry at Sora for no reason.

"Roxas, language." Dad scolded.

"Sorry, but I'm so fu-effing pissed." I sat back, leaning into Axel who had his arm wrapped around me.

"If Sora wants to meet him…then that's fine…" How could Dad say that? He felt just as hurt as I did! If not, more. Cloud left Dad – right after he proposed! I mean, yeah they couldn't legally get married, but it was the thought that counted. "Axel?"

"When I go home, I'll talk to him." I growled and went to move away from Axel when his eyes caught mine and gave me an apologetic look, so I ended up staying cuddled up next to him.

"Axel…" My dad started; his voice quieter than usual. "Is he happy?"

Axel looked down at me and asked me with his eyes what he should say. I shrugged, not knowing either.

"The truth. If you will."

"Yes. And he makes my dad happy too. They're both happy with each other…" Dad nodded sadly.

"Hey, who cares 'bout him! Ya have me now!" Cid said, trying to cheer my dad up.

"You're right. I have you, and I'm happy." Dad said, finally admitting that he was happy with another man than the sperm donor. Cid smiled brightly and gave my dad a really passionate kiss that made me want to watch—don't ask. But I ended up looking away after like two seconds.

It became a little more awkward in the room.

But they eventually broke up, their breathing heavy. Dad looked at me and Sora and smiled, no blush tinting his cheeks, but instead it was a slight flush that meant he was obviously aroused. I've seen that look enough times to know it. "Axel, and if you don't mind, I would like to see Cloud also. To see how's he's been faring."

"'Course! I'm actually gonna head back. I'll be back later." Axel stood up and started for the door, but before he could, I tackled him to the floor. "What the hell?!"

"You can't leave!" I said, my voice sounding a little desperate. "I mean…I—uh…Just don't go," my voice dropped to a whisper, "I want you to stay with me."

"I need to head home though; I have to talk to Dad and Cloud, and then get ready for school on Monday." I smiled and sat up, my legs beside his narrow hips. His hands were holding onto my hips, his thumbs caressing that skin that was near my prominent hipbones.

I heard Riku clear his throat, and I turned the top half of my body to look at him. "We're still in the room…"

"So? Don't like, don't watch." I said simply before turning back around and kissing Axel deeply. His moan made me smirk as he ran his tongue against the metal tongue ring over and over again, making me shiver and press myself closer to him. "Stop," I backed away slightly, "you're seriously turning me on!" My voice was a hushed whisper.

"Really?" He asked, his eyes portraying surprise.

"Yeah, see?" And I ground my hips into his, showing him I was indeed getting turned on. He moaned and flipped us over and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. One hand was on the floor by my head, holding him up, and the other was running along my leg, coming back up to go under my shirt and along my chest. I arched up into his hand, wanting more contact. Needing more contact. "Axel…let's go upstairs." He opened his eyes and looked at me. "Like now." I clarified.

Axel kissed me once more before standing and helping me up. We then saw that everyone had left the room and Axel's cheeks turned red. But he moaned when he looked back at me and took my hand, motioning with the other that I should go first. I smiled and took him upstairs, seeing everyone else sitting in the kitchen, looking at me and Ax with knowing smiles.

In my room, Axel had gently laid me on the bed after locking the door and pulling down the blinds; making the room almost completely dark. His hands were running along my arms before he entwined our hands. I looked to the side at them, flexing my fingers from in between his before relaxing them.

"I love you, Roxas." He whispered, his tone setting the romantic mood.

"I love you too." I answered without any hesitation – which completely surprised me. I never thought I would admit something like that to anyone so soon after Zexion died.

"Show me," I was about to ask, but he continued. "I don't know exactly what to do…but I want to make love to you. Can you show me…then maybe later we can…y'know, with me on top."

"Whoa! Are you asking me to make love to you? As in taking your virginity?" With a nod, I was floored—not literally, obviously.

"I just want to be close to you…it doesn't matter how." I smiled for what seemed like the trillionth time and squeezed our hands together before letting go and pressing on Axel's chest. We rolled over so I was on top and it was weird. With the height difference my body didn't match up with his, but he didn't seem too concerned about it. I kissed him, carefully removing his clothes while doing so. His shirt was the first to go. His bare chest was heaving while I ran my hands softly over it – pecking his lips chastely while sitting on his lower stomach. I sat up straight and pulled off my shirt, blushing softly when his hands ran along my skin and his eyes were glued to my chest.

I crawled off of him and lay on my side, letting my hands glide across his skin while I gently bit his neck, loving the moans that he let out quietly. "Roxas…" My name rolled off his tongue and fell from his lips in an alluring way that sped my hand up in its course, undoing his pants and pushing them aside so I could run it along his warm hardened length, smirking when he bucked up into my hand. I loved how he continued to moan my name, moving his hips in the gentlest motions up and down. So hot.

"More…" He whimpered, arching up into me once more before taking my hand off of him. "I want us to be as close as possible."

"I do too," I kept my voice at a whisper, feeling as though anything louder would ruin the mood drastically. "But…I want you in me." I kissed him slowly, letting him relax before I reached for the tube that would make it easier from under the pillow. "Just watch me." I coated my finger in the sweet smelling substance and bent myself so I could reach my entrance, slowly starting to stretch myself while Axel sat up; our eyes connected. I stretched my fingers, moaning as Axel raised his hand to lay it against my cheek.

When I knew I was stretched enough, I pulled my hand from myself and lay back against the pillows. I tugged on Axel's arm to get him to climb on top of me. He did so and we kissed once again. It was slow and meaningful. Perfect.

"Are you sure about this?" He asked, already pushing in. From just the feel of stretching around him, I couldn't say no. I wouldn't have wanted to anyways. "Ohh, Roxy!" Axel moaned while pushing the rest in. My nails were running along Axel skin against my will. The feeling that I got with him was just too much for me to handle, it was hard not to lose myself right then.

But I calmed down. Somehow. I heard Axel's continuous moan and his panting, and yet he still didn't move. He stayed where he was, hands gripping my hips tightly. Knowing that we were both ready to go, I started to rock myself, smiling lightly at the sound that escaped Axel. Both our eyes were opened once more and were looking into the others. I felt so connected to him at that point, like nothing could tear us apart.

He started to move once more, and I really couldn't help the moan/gasp desperate-like sound that left my lips. It was too good to have Axel inside of me.

"Oh," Axel sighed, thrusting slowly, obviously enjoying the little friction we got.

I pulled him closer to me and rocked with him, our bodies meeting each and every thrust.

I'm not sure how long we kept this soft movement going. Everything was just perfect the way it was. But once Axel made a noise of desperation, I rocked a little faster; meeting his new speed. Everything was silent once again as we both climaxed, the only true sound was the intake of air that we both needed as we came down from our euphoric highs.

Although we both released, Axel didn't stop moving, his hips still rolled slightly—much like they did last night. I don't think he noticed this and that made me smile. It left me able to feel that fading pleasure a little longer than I would have normally.

"Roxy…" He moaned softly, finally stopping the movement of his hips. "God, I love you." His voice was still low.

I replied with his name, my body relaxing as I became tired.

xxx

I woke up with Axel's arms around me, his body radiating heat. It was a nice feeling. I actually felt content.

I realized my face was buried in his chest and a light blanket was covering us and, by moving slightly, I realized that Axel was still in me. I blushed and wiggled slightly, getting out of his arms to slide myself off of him. When that was accomplished, I stood up and pulled on my boxers. I didn't expect it to be so late when I looked at the clock, but I knew that time didn't mean anything—my family was still up.

I quietly opened my door and shut it behind me as quickly as possible when I heard loud laughter travel up the stairs. I walked down slowly, thinking nothing of the pain that currently radiated through my lower half.

"Roxas! About time you finish! How long were you two at it?!" Sora called playfully from downstairs. I flipped him off when I got to the bottom and walked to the kitchen, bending as little as possible to grab a Fuze(6) from the refrigerator. "You owe me a blowjob, Ri-Ri!" I stood up and looked at Sora with the weirdest expression I could muster up.

"Okay." He said simply.

"Wait…either way we both would have won, right?" Riku nodded and smirked.

"Won what?" I asked, not bothering to open my Fuze yet.

"Who would top. You or Axel." I crossed my arms, ignoring the cold beverage against my side.

"And how do you know that I didn't top?" I questioned.

"'Cause I'm your brother." I rolled my eyes and walked back to the stairs, limping as little as possible. "See!" I heard Riku chuckle slightly before I headed up the stairs.

Back in my room, I saw that Axel was still sleeping. I opened my drink and took a sip before closing it and laying it on my side table. I slid off my boxers and climbed back into bed with him. Just as I did, his arms wrapped around me and pulled me towards him.

"Roxas…" He half-moaned. I smiled and let my eyes fall close, listening to his heartbeat as I fell asleep once more.

xxx

(7)I waved goodbye to Sora and my dad as they both drove away and left me at summer camp. Why was I here? Well, I didn't want to go on the family vacation. Long story, don't ask.

Anyways, I turned around and looked at this camp that had a name that I couldn't pronounce. I took a few steps forward and I was knocked down. I fell, dropping my backpack from the shoulder that I had it on and looked over to some purple haired kid was also on the ground, looking up fearfully at a couple of jerky-looking guys. I stood and walked in front of the one who knocked me down, helping him up by taking his hand.

"You jerks!" I called as they just walked away, not bothering to say anything. "You alright?" I asked, taking in his nerdy attire and short/small frame.

"Yeah, they do that every summer…" His voice was mumbled but sexy.

"I'm sorry. But," I said, feeling smart all of a sudden, "how bout you and I make a deal. I keep those guys away from you and you be my friend?"

"Not a real friendship, but I guess it's a start," He said, holding out his hand. "I'm Zexion. Don't laugh at my name, it was my grandpa's…"

"That's alright. Mine's Roxas. Don't know where it came from, don't care!" I took his hand and shook it. When I released it, I bent down and grabbed my bag. "Now where's cabin C?"

xxx

"Oh…Zexy…" I moaned; feeling bad for doing this right after I met him, but not being able care with the feel of his mouth travelling over my body and leaving marks over it. I knew it would look like I had some type of disease, but he was just so good with his mouth. 'Specially with only being fourteen.

"Shh," He whispered against my inner thigh, "can't be too loud…" I groaned and threw my head back, wanting to make so much more noise than I already was. There was a slight thud when my head collided with the wall, but other than that I was keeping pretty quiet while Zexion continued to bite me in different places before going up to my erection where he started to lick me.

My first blowjob…and I came right away.

But it was fucking amazing.

xxx

I woke up a while later, this time Axel was up too, staring down at me with eyes that were glossy. Either he had been crying—which I doubt—or he really did want last night to happen. He also had this smile on his face that I recognized right away. It was an 'I-just-did-something-and-you-won't-know-until-someone-points-it-out' kinda smile. But instead of saying something accusing, I just ignored it, not wanting to ruin the moment.

"Hey, there." I said; my voice was all gravely from sleep.

"Hey, there, yourself." I chuckled and cuddled back into him, not quite yet ready to wake up. "Come on, we should get up. It's almost eleven." I shook my head and wrapped an arm around his stomach and pulled our bodies closer together.

"Roxas? Axel? It's getting late." I heard my dad call through the door.

"We'll be down in…soon." I smiled at Axel's reply and rolled over so I was under him, wrapping my arms and legs around him. "Well, hello." Axel chuckled as he ground our hips together, noticing my growing erection. His chuckle turned into a moan as we continued to grind against each other.

"More…" I whispered, rocking against him faster, needing more of that friction.

"Can you just take me?" I nodded deftly, not caring that he could possibly hurt me. Either way, he stopped our bodies from moving and positioned himself, pressing in at the same pace that he used last night. I can't say it was painless, because god was it painful. I shut my eyes and ground my teeth together, not wanting to show Axel that he was hurting me. If he knew, then he would stop and he wouldn't get the pleasure that I could possibly give him if he continued.

After he set inside me, he waited a while before moving. Either it was because he couldn't control himself if he started to move right away, or he wanted to make sure I was okay, I didn't know—just appreciated it. When he started to move, there was that ache that was no doubt from the lack of lubrication. I couldn't stop him though. I knew that I would begin to enjoy it once I got used to the pain. I've had worse.

I kept my eyes closed and was clearly surprised when I felt Axel come to a stop, his breathing seriously erratic and his limbs shaking in desperation of release.

"Roxas…" Axel whispered. I opened my eyes slowly, some reason afraid of what I was going to see. "Look at me." I did as he said, not noticing that his voice wasn't hostile at all. "You're not enjoying this, are you?" I stared at him for a few more moments before shaking my head no.

Just as he was about to pull out, I tightened myself around him, feeling grateful that he groaned and stopped moving away. "But it's fine! I'll enjoy it in a little while; as long as you get off, I'm good." I said truthfully. This time it was his turn to shake his head no as he continued to pull out, ignoring my attempts to stop him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It's fine. It's not as easy to enjoy when you're not feeling any pleasure." Axel said as he pulled out, laying next to me.

It was then that I noticed I wasn't hard anymore. I felt horrible. That's how he knew I wasn't enjoying it. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't be. Let's just go down." I nodded and sat up, swinging my legs off the bed to get good footing before I stood to pull on my boxers and pants. I looked to the ground and saw my shirt laying there. I went to bend down for it, but Axel pulled me back, grabbing my shirt for me. "There, love." I smiled and took his hand after pulling on my shirt.

Downstairs, Dad was curled up against the arm of the couch, watching one of his shows; Sora had his head on his lap, eyes closed. Cid and Riku were no where to be seen. That's when I realized what day it was.

Saturday.

Family day.

I sighed and turned to Axel. "I'm sorry, you have to go. Today's when Dad, Sora, and I spend time together." I pouted.

"It's okay, Roxy. I need to get home anyways." I nodded and leaned up on my toes, hand on his shoulders to bring him down to my height to give him a chaste kiss.

"I love you," he said, a look in his eyes telling me that he hoped that I would say it back.

"I love you, too." Knowing I meant it, I said it loudly.

And once he was out the door, I prepared myself for the teasing that I knew would come along with the whole 'I love you' thing.

When nothing happened, I turned to look at Dad and Sora; they both were looking at me with wide eyes. I then realized that that has been the first time I had admitted my love for anyone one since Zexion. Blushing, I walked over and sat on the single chair. They still hadn't said anything, but I looked away so I wasn't able to see their expressions.

"Are you telling the truth?" Dad asked me.

"Course! I think…I really do love Axel…I mean, he loves me…and if I didn't love him I know I could come to love him, I think. But even if I didn't there's nothing wrong with dating him. You can't tell me that everyone you've dated, you've loved, 'cause if you do, that's a straight out lie!" I rambled, taking a breath before starting again.

"Roxas!" Sora snapped, sitting up to glare at me. I sat back in my chair, realizing that I had yelled at Dad…something I haven't ever done since he's taken us in…

"Oh god…I'm so sorry!" I covered my mouth with my hands, hoping that I wouldn't say anything else equally as stupid.

"It's alright, I understand." And with that he went back to watching his show and everything was silent but for that eerie silence that only broke when Sora cleared his throat, giving me a look while declared that he was going to get a drink. When he got up, I went over and took his place, sitting closer to Dad than Sora…

"Daddy…?" I questioned, looking up for some sign of approval.

"That's the first time you've actually raised your voice at me…"

"And it'll be the last, I swear! I never meant to yell." I quickly said, not wanting him to think anything bad.

"I know…it's just a shock really, I'm glad it's about nothing serious though." He turned and looked at me, smiling slightly, not showing his teeth. But at least it was something.

I wrapped my arms around him and snuggled close to him. "I love you."

"And I love you, too, Roxas." He lifted his arm and hugged me close, relaxing me as I breathed in his musky scent. "Now, I'll ask again, do you really love him?"

"Yeah, I really think I do…" I simply said.

xxx

The next day, I woke up with Sora jumping on my bed and Dad leaning on my doorframe.

"Wha-at?!" I complained, covering myself with the blankets only to have Sora pull them off the next second.

"Holy shite!" Sora yelled, poking different parts of my sensitive body.

"Ow! What was that for?!" I asked, sitting up and rubbing the spot where he poked, ending up hurting it more. "What is that?" I asked, looking over my discolored body. "What the hell?!" I panicked.

"Wow…Axel wants everyone to know who you belong to." Dad put in.

"Those are hickies?!" (8) Sora asked, poking another one that was at the end of my boxers on the inside of my thigh.

"I don't even remember him doing any of this…I don't know if that's good or bad…"

"Bad, seeing how it probably was really pleasurable." Dad said, causing me and Sora to blush. "But anyways, get up; we have to go school shopping." I groaned and fell back on my bed, using my feet to pull up the blanket.

"Don't argue, I already tried it. And you don't wanna miss our Senior Year!" I groaned and got up reluctantly, feeling the bruises no matter how I moved. "So, you still going with the 'emo' look this year?!" Sora asked as I grabbed my things for the shower.

"No, I think I'll just wear whatever I want to this time around…" I said, thinking of all our friends that we were going to see again…and not…

"Roxy?" Dad came over to me, sitting on my bed next to where I fell back just then. "What's wrong?" He asked, wrapping his arm around me like he did the day before.

"Axel…"

"What about him?"

"He won't be there next year," Sora finished for me.

"Aw, sweetie…" Dad started to run his hand through my hair, brushing back my sleep tousled bed-head. "You'll still see him."

"I know…but I didn't even think about it last year."

"I understand, but let's just get to shopping then we'll call Axel over and he can stay for dinner. But you and Sora have to get to bed early. There's school tomorrow." We both groaned as Dad chuckled and got up, leaving us alone in my room.

"You really didn't realize that last year Axel was a senior, did you?" I shook my head. "Well if it makes you feel any better, Riku graduated with him and it going to college so I'll be seeing even less of him than you will of Axel." I felt for my brother, I understood how he felt.

"Think Axel and Riku would risk sneaking in tonight after Dad goes to bed?" I offered, knowing how lonely we both felt last night.

"I'll call Ri-Ri!" And he scrambled out of the room, leaving me alone.

Sighing, I grabbed my cell phone and called Axel, waiting impatiently for him to answer. "Hey there baby." He answered with a smooth voice.

"Hiya!" I felt chipper all of a sudden…

"You sound like you just woke up." I 'mhm'ed, but didn't say anything else. "What made you so happy this morning?"

"Don't know. I just feel…happy?" I giggled, feeling like I just had some laughing gas.

"Ha," He laughed. "Well, I'd love to sit and talk to you for hours on end, but Dad and I were just about to go for a drive, is there something you needed?"

"Yeah, Dad's taking Sora and I school shopping, and before you say anything, yes I know school starts tomorrow, 'member, we're all procrastinators? And I was kinda wondering if you wanted to come over for dinner?"

"Course! Then maybe…never mind." He was going to say what I thought he was…

"Yeah…Sora and Dad wanted to see him anyways."

"Cool…I'll tell him and Dad. Call us when you're ready."

"Yeah…but one more thing…" I said…poking at random hickies on my body.

"Yeah, baby?" I heard Reno poke fun at him in the background.

"Why, dear, are there multiple hickies covering my body?" I asked in a snide-ish tone.

"Uh…I was bored and you were asleep. I love you, I'll talk to you later, bye!" And he hung up…wuss.

"They'll all be over for dinner?"Dad's voice scared me and caused me to jump off the bed. He chuckled lightly, his red eyes lighting up.

"Uh yeah…where'd you come from?" I asked shyly, turning my back and grabbing my things to go and take a shower.

"You get lost in thought when you're on the phone with Axel." I smiled inwardly and turned back around, my shower things in my arms. "Hurry, I want to leave the house before ten." I nodded and left to go to the bathroom.

xxx

I collapsed on my couch; phone in hand, texting Axel telling him he could come over. Sora already was with Riku in his room doing god only knows.

'b ovr soon.' He must have been driving or something, otherwise he would have spelt everything out. Moaning slightly, I laid back on the couch, getting comfortable after I rolled my shoulder back. I closed my eyes for only a second, not expecting Axel to be there a moment later. I jumped up and wrapped my arms around him, hugging him close.

"Fell asleep, did you?" Axel teased, his whispering voice seeming loud in my ear.

"How'd you get in?" I asked when I pulled back from him.

"Your dad…" I sat up, looking around to see me and Axel alone in the living room. "They're all in the kitchen. Cid's here too." I cursed quietly and got up, going to the kitchen as quickly as possible.

"It's been a while…" I heard my dad say quietly. If you didn't know him, you wouldn't have been able to hear the slight tone change that meant he was about to cry.

"Vince…it has." I felt angry as Cloud called Dad by that.

"Hey Dad!" Sora came up next to me, not realizing that Cloud was there. "Uhm…" He fell silent.

It was so awkward. I wanted to leave the room, but I wanted to be there as support for Dad. But I guess my awkwardness won over. I turned and walked out of the room, pulled Axel along with me. I went up the stairs and into my room. Once Axel was in, I slammed my door as loud as I could, locking it.

"Rox-mmph!" I kissed Axel roughly, needing to get my mind off the fact that I was severely pissed off. "Whoa, hold it there." I shook my head and pushed him on the bed, straddling his hips and pulling his shirt off. "We can't…" I nodded and attached my lips to his neck, intent on making him have just as many hickies as I do.

"Stop!" Axel said firmly, turning me over and pinning me to the bed. I closed my eyes and sighed heavily. "What's wrong with you?"

Pushing Axel off of me, I paced the little room I had. "I don't want him here." I muttered, my hands feeling restless.

"I know, but it'll give your dad closure, and he'll be able to live happily with Cid, right?" I looked over to Axel, not expecting him to be so smart. "I am a high school grad, remember?" I giggled at his face and walked towards him, wrapping my arms around his neck to hug him. "I love you, Roxy."

"I love you too, Axel." It was a mutual type thing when we broke our hug and brought our lips together. It was a soft kiss and I felt my mind go completely blank as I concentrated on what I was feeling.

"Roxas? Ax?" I heard Axel's dad, Reno, call through the door. "You two okay?"

"Yeah, Dad." Axel hugged me close once more before stepping back to open the door. "Whatchya doin' up here?"

"Cloud and Vincent wanted some time alone to talk." Reno walked in my room, looking around at everything. "It's nice. Very home-ish-ly." I smiled awkwardly and watched him avoid the bed like a plague.

"There something wrong with the bed, Dad?" Axel asked, smirking.

"Oh! No, nothing at all. Except that fact that my son and his boyfriend had sex on it, nothing is wrong with it." I giggled and watched Axel tackle his Dad, making them both fall onto the bed. "Ew!" Reno all but screamed, pushing Axel onto the ground and jumping off the bed, running to the door. "Now I hafta burn this outfit, yo!" I laughed at his expression as he started to undress.

First he took off his jacket, then started to unbutton his pants. I stopped laughing and stared at his fit torso.

"Dad!" Axel snapped, stopping his father from taking off his pants, seeing my impressed expression "Seriously, stop."

"Sorry…but it's gross." I giggled and felt my cheeks turn red as he started to redo his pants. But instead of putting his shirt back on, he walked down the stairs, leaving his clothes on my floor.

"Dear lord!" My boyfriend complained, grabbing the clothes off the floor and running after his immature 'parental figure'.

When I got downstairs, I saw Axel and Reno both on different sides of the couch. "Dad…put your shirt. Back. On." Axel said calmly, trying to maneuver over the couch.

"Never!" Reno yelled childishly.

"Reno Sinclair!" We all froze at the sound of Cloud's voice. "Axel?" Axel tossed Cloud the shirt. "Reno, put your shirt back on."

"But, Cloudy…" Axel's dad whined.

"No. Put. It. On." He said firmly.

"That's not what you were saying last night." He muttered and I erupted with laughter as Axel snorted and mouthed a 'thanks' to the sperm donor. From then on, it was completely silent, but I think Sora and Riku went upstairs while I was in my room, for I didn't see them anywhere. I don't know Reno well enough, but if Ax got any of his genes from his Dad, then it was very unusual for them to be quiet.

Must be the tension.

"Uhm…" I cleared my throat. "Dinner ready, Dad?" He nodded and then turned back to go into the kitchen, leaving me chuckling nervously before I followed him.

I automatically started to set the table for three.

"Roxas…there's eight of us, help me put the leaf in." I nodded and put the plates on the counter and helped Dad pull the table apart to put the extra piece in.

"But …" I added, grabbing more plates out of the cabinet.

"I know…"

xxx

"That's great!" Sora exclaimed between his laughter. I even couldn't help giggling at the story Cloud had just told us.

"Yeah…and he never lets me live it down, yo!" Reno chuckled, taking Cloud's hand in his and giving him a smile much like the kind Cid gave to Dad whenever they thought no one was looking. Well, that was before they started to 'openly date' each other. Now that's the only look he gives Dad.

"Well, Vinny, that was fillin'!" Cid said, pushing his plate further up on the table to lay his arms across it. Everyone was just finishing up and kept on getting distracted on the stories being told.

"Hey, Vincent…" Reno started in a conniving voice. I mentally and physically prepared myself for anything. "Was Cloud always so kinky in bed?" And us teens all got up and ran out of the room, leaving a laughing Reno in the dining room with the chuckling adults.

"Ew!" Axel yelled, making it so his dad heard. "I did not need to know that." He shuddered and ran up the stairs, leaving Riku laughing at the foot with Sora and I halfway there.

"Why aren't you grossed out?" Sora asked, walking down to stand next to his boyfriend.

"Because, I'm not related to any of them, so to me, it's fucking hot." I gaped at him and made a gagging noise before turning to go up the stairs. "It must be where you get your kinkiness from."

"Oh god!" I groaned, running to my room and slamming my door once more.

"Rox? What happened to you, besides the obvious?" Axel took my hand and brought me to sit on the bed.

"I just learned that not only is the sperm donor kinky but so is my brother I feel like I know too much." I said all this in one breath, tone even like Dad's. I guess it was funny, for Axel started laughing at me, shaking his head as though this was somehow amusing.

"I love you." He said while he giggled and laid back on my bed, yawning and stretching tiredly.

"Love ya too…" I said.

"Come here, babe." I fell back against him, my head on his arm. "I'm glad you gave me a chance." He said, staring at the ceiling. It still had glow in the dark stars on it.

"I am too…sometimes." He nudged me and chuckled slightly before laying on top of me and kissing me sweetly. "Hey, Ax, how long have you loved me?"

"Forever."

"How long will you love me?"

"Forever."

I smiled lightly and cuddled closer to him. I thought everything would be perfect the rest of the night, but instead Axel let out this long sigh. "What's wrong?"

"Forever isn't long enough."

---

End Author's Note: So that's it. It took me three-ish months to write this and I'm very proud. I hope you liked it, Lizzy! I worked extra hard on making it absolutely perfect for you. And when I started it I had no idea where it was headed and I'm proud to say that it turned out perfect. I also hope that others, besides Liz, enjoyed this.

I would like to thank xX-Escape-The-Memories-Xx and starrynights88 for editing this long story for me. Shaye-bear, you're awesome. And you don't know how much I love you.
Also, Yoshimara, I would also like to thank you for editing a few parts that I needed help on. Without you, that one part would have been utter shite! LOL

(1) - Tommy Boy reference. It's a movie. In it, Tommy would say something and it wouldn't make sense and then Richard would say something smart-ass like and Tommy would go, 'Shut up, Richard.' My family and I say it all the time

(2) - A pow-wow is like a little group get together thing to talk about strategy and whatnot. My mom and I do it all the time.

(3) - Don't think I came up with the idea, I actually got it from Acheron by Sherrilyn Kenyon. That book is my bible and a couple of those ideas were totally awesome.

(4) - I decided to use this as Axel's birthday, cause it only makes sense. Don't question my insanity. XD

(5) - I SWEAR I did not mean for the numbers to come up that way. I typed a random number in and when I was rereading it, I was like, 'Dude! That's 8/13! As in AKUROKU!' I was happy....in da pants.

(6) - For those of you who don't know, Fuze is a type of vitamin drink that is really good.

(7) - I thought it would be a good time to insert some of Roxas' past. It also helped with the situation that laid up ahead when he woke up from the dream.

(8) - It's possible for the hickies not to show for a day. My ex-girlfirend gave me one and it didn't show up for a couple days and when it did, it was huge! And dark!