Author's Notes: I've been a lurker at for some time now, and it took me a while for me to actually create an account. I decided I might as well start with a fanfic that has been in my head for a while. I hope you enjoy this. Please read and review.

Summary: A magical couple, a Gryffindor and Slytherin, who weren't able to have children of their own ended up raising Harry. As loving as that may sound, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. SSLE, JPOC, AU, fluffy/angst. Dark!Harry fic.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor will I ever own it. Oh yes, 'tis a sad fate, but it must be so, for without J.K. Rowling, there wouldn't be a Harry Potter. I could never be so ridiculously clever to come up with such a story.

Running Into Walls, Jumping Over Hurdles

There was always a wall that I ran into. I loved her; she didn't love me. I wanted to marry her. She didn't want to marry me. It was that simple. I had insulted her so badly in the past that she fell for James rather than for me. That didn't last long, thank Merlin. He was, in short, a bloody ass. He cheated on her…twice. James Potter was a pathetic excuse for a Gryffindor. He was brave enough to cheat on her, but he wasn't brave enough to apologize to her. Instead, the man left her forever, and valued his job as an Auror over his job as a boyfriend.

She ended up coming back to me and we repaired our torn friendship. That friendship eventually blossomed into a romance. In the end she married me, Severus Snape, and we have lived somewhat happily since then. I had jumped emotional hurdles before marrying her, and according to her I had somewhat grown out of my, "emotionless prick," stage. I only show that side to her. Showing that side to others would only mean the ruin of my well-built reputation.

However, we have not succumbed to that fabled, "happily ever after," syndrome. I am running into walls yet again. She wants children and I do not. We have been fighting over this for the past three months. This isn't surprising though. We've always fought about both petty and major things, so this isn't any different. Her reason for wanting children is because she loves them. My reasons include not wanting spawn or offspring, because Merlin knows, there is enough of "me" in the world, and I am sure the wizarding world is in agreement.

My wife disagrees, and therefore I am always running into walls.

The man is unbelievable. I haven't a clue why he doesn't want children. He claims it's because the world does not need another Severus Snape. That's a lie, and I know it. He has another reason but he just won't reveal it. That or he doesn't know of the underlying reason. The man needs therapy from a psychewizard. He went through so much hell as a child himself; maybe he's afraid of terrorizing his child and his own father terrorized him.

His resistance has made him get to the point where he no longer seems to have interest in what he does. He enjoys potions, sure, but he has no love for that in his career now. He's been blatantly saying how much he would like the Defense Against the Dark Arts position, but Dumbledore won't give the position to him. I have an idea why.

After being pressured into serving under the Dark Lord by his Slytherin peers, he was more susceptible to the darker habits. Yet he made an unbreakable vow to be loyal to Dumbledore with me as the "binder." He will be loyal to the Order and he will not go against them. Yet, he still has the Dark Mark and he is called from time to time to see the Death Eaters. On one hand, I can see Dumbledore's reasoning. He still doesn't fully trust Snape. At least he trusts him enough to actually to let him have the potions position. I just offered to be his Teacher's Assistant. I get a smaller wage than he, but at least we both work and I get to work with him. Sometimes, when he's working on a special potion for Dumbledore or for Lupin…or even for the Dark Lord, I will teach the potions class for him. I think the students are thrilled when I teach. It gives them a break from Snape's usual snide remarks and harsh tone.

If the students truly knew how he could be, then perhaps they would give him respect out of reverence rather than respect out of fear. Perhaps that's why he really doesn't want to have a child. Maybe it's because he's afraid that the child will have only respect for him out of fear? It seems plausible. At this moment, however, I can't just keep focusing on the whys. I must figure out a way to show him that having a child is a wonderful thing. Maybe I could get Dumbledore to talk to him…no. That would be a horrible move. If Snape ever found out that I talked to Dumbledore about something as personal as this, I'd never hear the end of it. He would be furious. I must find some way to overcome this obstacle. I will have a child in the end.

James strutted into the Auror office with a broad grin on his face. His partner and coworkers were able to immediately pinpoint what exactly was "wrong," with James. James usually came in with a sour expression and a full mug of hot black coffee. Today, he was as happy-go-lucky as Dumbledore would be on the Muggle drug morphine.

"Well, somebody got lucky last night," said Leisian, twirling his wand in his hand. "Who was the girl?" James rolled his eyes. He should've known his partner would be able to pick up on his undeniable contentment. "A pretty girl," he replied.

Leisian moaned and covered his hands over his eyes, dropping his wand on his spotless desk. "You picked her up at the whore-witch house didn't you? Merlin, James, this is the second time this month. Honestly, why don't you just get over Lily Evans and get a real girlfriend?" James took off his beige coat, threw it over his chair, took his wand from his pocket, threw it on his desk, threw the empty butterbeer bottles on his desk in the wastebasket, and sank into his chair, putting his hands behind his head. "I am over Lily, you moron," James said casually. "She was in and out of my life like a dream."

"She was a dream. You went out with her for over a year. You haven't been able to have a commitment to a real woman since. Just admit it and stop going to the whore-witch house. You know how terrible those places are. It isn't right for an Auror. It isn't good for your reputation," said Leisian, as he ruffled through the inbox of case files on his desk. "So, who was she, the witch that made you ridiculously…happy?"

James grinned broadly from ear to ear and looked at Leisian with a dreamy expression. "Her name was Solaris, and I was her first according to the Head Madam of the Triple X Magic House. She was…riveting, in a word. She gave me a fantastic aphrodisiac; I swear, I remember everything in vivid detail and I can actually relive it in my dreams. She had long, dark red hair, and bright blue eyes. The woman was absolutely amazing. She looked like a goddess," said James, leaning backwards in his chair and putting his feet on top of his paper and case file covered desk. "When we made love, her wand shot purple sparks. It was absolutely beautiful."

Leisian simply scoffed at this and said, "You need to get your head out of the clouds. Go get a real girlfriend, please. I do want to hear anymore about your love life at the Triple X Magic House. You're my partner. The nostalgia of you going to a Triple X Magic House is getting rather old." James glowered at Leisian, but Leisian and his outrageously calm self took a sip of his own coffee, lifting his green mug off the napkin and then using the napkin to wipe the old crumb residue off his desk.

James took his feet off the desk and began to look for his inbox, finding it under some bland manila folders. As usual, there was nothing new in it, so he began to sort through his mess of papers looking for something of interest. There wasn't anything truly interesting to investigate today. There were some complaints from Mrs. Barbachek regarding her next door neighbor's constant thumping and his misuse of silencing charms in his apartment, and there was one complaint about an enchanted snake being cast by a crazy wizard going through a mid-life crisis.

There was nothing of real value on his desk. That was, until Leisian put something down on his desk that read, "Dark Wizard Sightings." "What's this, Leisian?" James asked, picking up the file and thumbing through it with interest. "We've got some reports about a dark wizard being spotted around Hogsmeade," said Leisian in his thick Scottish accent. "Apparently, a lot of the witches and wizards are feeling it's presence around the Hogshead and Shrieking Shack. It looks like our new assignment is to go to the Shrieking Shack and see if there's anything unusual."

Under any other circumstance, James would've said no to this considering how little evidence was being presented, but something in his heart told him to investigate. He grabbed his wand off the desk, stuffed it in his pocket, and adjusted his Auror badge on top of his beige coat. "Let's go ahead and check it out. Should be more interesting than what I've got on top of my desk." Leisian nodded and he put his wand in his pocket, swept some stray lint strands off of his gray coat, grabbed his black bowler hat with the white median material, and followed James out the door.

Author's Notes: Not bad, I think. It's getting there. You must forgive this author for the lateness between chapters; I am currently in college working on my English major. Life is a bit difficult for me at the moment. I'm very, very tired. Hope you enjoy this first chapter.