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She couldn't believe that the image before her was him. His blonde hair was not slicked back the way he had once worn it, but instead falling in messy locks around his head. It was the way she liked it. His once hollow icy eyes had a new depth to them that had been missing from his warm gaze for some number of years. He might not have had it during his Hogwarts years, but his mother had seen it in him during the darkest hours of the war they'd pulled through together. She had imagined it was his hope that they would live another day, but almost immediately after the war it had vanished as soon as it had come. Of course, she knew she never really understood what had put that look in her son's eye, and so she didn't know how to question its absence. Instead, she stepped back and hoped that one day her son would lit up once more the way she knew he could.

And as though living through the war was not proof enough that some rouge angel was watching over her and her family, Draco, for the first time, brought home a witty young woman who could have full length conversations with Lucius without ever being burned by his flaming remarks. She could also spend hours on end with Narcissa, both women smiling and laughing as though they had known each other for years, and while Narcissa liked that about young Astoria Greengrass, she loved the girl for lighting up her son once more. Though Narcissa would never really know the truth, she had a feeling Astoria , although the first to come home to Malfoy Manor with her son, was not the first woman to catch his heart.

The past, however, as all Malfoys learned the hard way, must be left in the past, and so Narcissa did her best to push away all thoughts about the mysterious woman whom she believed her son had once loved with an intensity comparable to the intensity with which he loved Astoria. She also knew, however, that the first is never forgotten, and she feared her son was learning that lesson before her eyes.

His smile was warm, but his eyes were only partially lit. The parts of him not glowing from happiness that in a few short hours he would be husband to an Astoria Malfoy, were lost in the past, a look Narcissa recognized only because she wore it often. There was nothing she could do, however, but allow him to spend the last few moments of his single life basking in the memory of a woman long lost, and thoughts of what if.

Narcissa had long ago accepted that she never know the name of that woman, despite how desperately she wanted to. She did not want to know for any reason but to know who to keep in her most inner prayers. She wanted to know the name of the woman who very well saved her son during the darkest days of his life. She might've broken him somehow in the process, but just as there's always an appeal to a first love, a first heart break shines in its own way too.

"You should take your seat soon." Draco said as he reached out for his mother's hand. He saw the conflicted look in her eye, but didn't know what it meant. He had no idea what his mother's inner most thoughts were. She had always been so talented at keeping them hidden from the world, and it was a trait that very well could have been a large part of their survival all those years ago.

"I will, Draco." She answered softly. "Are you happy?"

"Of course I am." Draco's voice and smile was truthful, and his eyes lit up for a moment before returning to the past.

"Completely?"

For a moment silence fell around the two as Draco looked into his mother's eyes, unsure if she had somehow developed the ability to read minds.

"Everybody has a few regrets." He answered simply. Of course, he knew that telling anyone else such a statement risked the chance that everyone would become convinced that he had cold feet about the marriage and was unsure if he wanted Astoria as his wife. His mother, however, knew much better than that. Astoria was not among the many regrets Draco had about his life, but that mysterious woman was certainly near the top of the list.

"Have you seen her since the war, Draco?" Narcissa asked gently. She had never broached the subject of this woman in the past and was unsure if Draco would talk about it.

"Only…" Draco started to answer but paused for a moment as he stared at his mother in shock. "How did you know?"

"The look in your eyes." She answered softly.

"Only a handful of times." Draco replied softly, "But that hardly matters. I'm getting married."

"I understand." Narcissa spoke gently when she heard Draco's voice starting to carry an edge, perhaps in defense of a woman he had not loved in years. "I know you love Astoria, Draco. You would have to be a fool not to. She's a wonderful woman, and she loves you, and you'd have to be a fool not to see how much you both love each other."

"Then why can't I focus on her?" Draco's voice had lost the defensive edge, and instead sounded almost broken. Narcissa knew his pain for once upon a time she had felt it too. With a motherly smile, she reached out and touched his warm cheek.

"It's not because you don't love her, darling."

"Then why?"

"They say time heals all wounds, but sometimes things tear so deeply that nobody can reach in far enough to repair all the damage."

She was probably right. The women in his life tended to always be right. Something about intuition or some other irrational reason.

Nonetheless, Draco could not help but feel she wasn't entirely right. Yes, he'd been broken once, and for quite a while, but he had healed also. She had healed him. Somehow, she had healed him. He was sure of it. He just could not remember the exact moment the healing started, or stopped for that matter. But he certainly tried to remember…

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