"Aren't humans just so interesting, Namie-chan?"
The addressed woman did not respond.
The two were standing outside of a large purple tent. Izaya thought the structure looked more like a circus tent than a witch's one, but the flyer had unmistakably advertised for a witch. He pulled it out of his pocket to double check.
It was wrinkled, but the words were easily legible.
WITCH, it read in big bold letters, A WITCH IS COMING TO YOUR CITY FOR ONE WEEK ONLY. FOR A CHEAP PRICE, HAVE YOUR FORUNTE READ! GET CHARMS CASTED! WHISHES GRANTED! In the center was a veiled woman with a crystal ball.
Izaya laughed at the flyer for not the first time before tucking it back away. It was so funny! Humans came up with the most amusing ideas! Of course after seeing the flyer, the information broker couldn't resist checking it out himself. It was a scam. It had to be. Now Izaya didn't deny the existence of the supernatural, he owned the head of a Dullahan after all, but this was so stereotypical he couldn't seriously consider it being genuine. It was the human behind the scam that interested him.
He had, of course, done his research on her before he visited. Her name was Lilith. She traveled from city to city offering her services. She stayed around just long enough for people to hear about her but not long enough to stick around for the results her services. She left before people could catch on that she was a fraud. He was able to find a few blog posts that claimed she was genuine, but Izaya attributed that to coincidences and gullible fools. He loved humans. They could convince themselves of anything.
"Hey, what are you going to wish for?" Izaya asked.
"Your silence," Namie calmly responded.
"Awww, how cruel! You wound me, Namie-chan!" Izaya playfully whined.
The tent was about the size of a shack and was made of a beautiful purple fabric. When Izaya ran it between his finger, it felt like silk. The faint smell of burning incense came from it. Izaya walked inside it, Namie following behind him.
Smoke hovered above the ground, which Izaya thought to be an impressive touch. The room was lit only by candles, and the lack of decoration made it seem larger than it was. In the middle of the tent was a table with a crystal ball on it, and a woman sitting behind it. She matched the photo in the flyer. Her face could still be made out under the thin veil. She had long black hair and beautiful jewelry hanging from her forehead. Her green eyes looked up from the crystal ball in the middle of the table to the visitors.
"Welcome. Are you two here to see the witch Lilith?" The woman's words came out like a purr and oddly smooth.
"Yes we are. You, I assume?" Izaya responded.
The woman nodded. She ran her hands over the crystal ball. Clouds seemed to swirl around inside it. Namie was unimpressed. Izaya faked an "ooooooh."
"What can I help you with?" The woman ask. "For a small fee, I can look into your future or cast a spell to help even your wildest dreams come true. Are you struggling with love? Money? Happiness?"
Izaya sighed dramatically and took the seat across from her. He leaned forward and took her hands in his own. The woman flinched slightly.
"Lilith-san, I've been having a terrible problem." He sighed dramatically. "I'm worried about my future! I feel like I'm destined for greatness, but, oh, what if I'm not? Please, Lilith-san, assure me that my future won't be a boring one."
Namie scoffed. Izaya ignored her. Lilith moved her hands away from his and began to move them around the crystal ball.
"Certainly. Who doesn't worry about their future? But worry no more. I am here, and I shall make all clear."
"Thank you, Lilth-san!"
The crystal ball took on a different color. First yellow, then blue, and finally black before starting the transition all over again. Lilith started to hum. The lights flickered on and off. Izaya noticed her left food was moving strangely beneath the cloth that covered the table. He assumed she was hitting some switch under the table.
"I see- Yes, I see! You will live a long, happy, peaceful life." Now Lilth's voice sounded deeper and scratchy, like she was in a trance. "You will marry a young woman and start a happy family. You will travel the world. You may be struggling with conflicts now, but all will work out in the end."
The smoke returned to a white color. Izaya laughed so hard he had to hold his stomach.
"I knew it! What a hoax! Me? Marry a young woman and start a family! Like I'd ever want to do anything like that!"
The witch's eyes widened. Unlike the mature woman she had been acting like before, she now seemed shocked and unsure.
"The spirits must be playing tricks on me," she explained. "I'll try again-"
"No, I think you're the one playing tricks on me!" Izaya laughed. He titled the table upwards to pear beneath it. The witch squeaked. She tried to stop him but quickly moved out of his way. On the ground were several peddles with cords connected to them. "Ah, I knew it! This is how you were controlling everything! What a joke!"
"I- That's not it! You see-"
"See that you're a fraud! I bet your name isn't really even Lilith, is it?"
The woman looked furious and about to cry. "For your information, it's Bettybob!" Her silky voice had been replaced with a high pitch tone. "And this stuff might be fake, but my magic is real!"
"Oh?" Izaya grinned, interested. "Then prove it. You said you can cast spells right? Grant wishes and all that jazz?"
Bettybob huffed. "I wouldn't have left the farm if this was all smoke and mirrors."
Izaya laughed again. "I don't see the point of keeping up the act, but if you insist, prove it. I wish for you to make Shizuo Heiwajima fall in love with me!"
Because her brand of so called magic worked through coincidences and self-fulfilling prophecies. It was more likely for the world to end than for Shizuo falling in love with him. That would take nothing short of magic.
"And in return?" Bettybob asked bravely.
"And in return, I'll make you famous. You may not know this since you're new to the area, but I have the connections to do so." He gave the promise freely. She didn't have the power to win the bet.
He would enjoy watching her fail. He would spread rumors later about her later and crush her business. He turned his back to the so called witch.
"Come on Namie-chan. We're done here."
Bettybob watched them go. Her heart was racing. She was furious. She would prove that man wrong, and then everyone would know of her. She didn't doubt the man's promise. She could pick up on a liar.
Tonight was a full moon, which meant she could easily cast the spell. Hopefully. Hhe couldn't remember if the hex required the word mori or hori... Her mentor always said she was too careless to be a witch.
Izaya.
When Shizuo opened his eyes, Izaya was the first word that came to his mind, and oddly enough, that didn't make him want to vomit.
"Hey, Shizuo, you alright?" Tom asked.
A crowd of people had gathered around him on the street with Tom at the front. For a brief moment, Shizuo stared blankly up at the sky as he tried to recall his last thoughts. He had been heading to someone's house with Tom, there had been a sharp pain in his chest, and then he was on his back.
There was also a weird feeling floating around inside of him. Shizuo couldn't find words to define it. There was a longing to see that annoying flea. It felt like the cravings he got when he didn't smoke for a few days. The memories of Izaya felt uncharacteristically warm.
It made no fucking sense. Shizuo attributed it to waking up from fainting. With a grunt, he stood and dusted himself off.
"Just fine." He stretched his various bodies parts, making sure they were all working correctly. "I don't know what came over me."
"Maybe it was something you ate?" Tom offered.
The crowd began to gradually disperse now that they could see that Shizuo was fine.
"I doubt it. I haven't eaten anything unusual." But Shizuo didn't give his fainting spell too much thought. He had good health and was pretty tough. He wasn't worried.
"You sure? I understand if you want to take the day off."
Shizuo shook his head. "I'm fine, don't worry about it."
The blond man caught sight of a man wearing clothes similar to Izaya's attire across the street. He found himself briefly hoping it was the information broker and not just so he could punch him.
Shizuo tried to forget the desire as he continued walking down the street with Tom.