The nurses were going through their routine of checking on patients and other duties that their jobs required of them. In this small city there was not that many overnight patients and it was appearing that things would be running smoothly tonight, everything was calm and quite. It was at this time that there came a noise, quiet slapping of heels, one of the few sounds that one could hear in the hallway. A hurrying figure turned the corner as they calmly looked for the right room, drops of rain still hanging on their raincoat as they go.

The moon had already risen when she had finally arrived at the hospital. She was quickly directed to ICU, and towards a portion of the hospital that was the least busy and perhaps the quietest. The moment that they had been contacted, her mother had pulled strings and practically thrown money at the hospital to make sure that the press didn't get news of this.

When she found the room, she paused outside the door and tried to make herself more presentable by fixing her hair and straightening her coat. She had her hand on the handle ready to push open the door, when a thought stop her. What if they didn't want her here?

She hadn't heard of or seen the person inside in three years. She didn't know how they would react, though it saddens her that at one time she could have confidently walked in and know exactly what the reaction would be. What if they had already disowned her, they hadn't parted in the best of terms.

Perhaps it would be better to just turn around and go back to Morocco but one look through the big window to see the resting girl inside made her change her mind.

The girl was very thin, so thin that one could start to see an outline of her skeleton. Her hair looked slick and unwashed, her cheeks were hallow and her face was gaunt, and her hospital gown hung limply and loosely against her weak frame. She looked sickly pale, and overall, she was a heartbreaking, poignant sight. This broken scrawny girl was nothing like the strong rebellious girl she remembers.

No it wouldn't be better to run, it would be easier yes, but not better. She didn't help or support the resting girl when she needed it the most, maybe it was time to try to mend things. And with a goal in mind she swung open the door and walked in determined to stay with the other girl until she woke up.

The first thing that she noticed was the smell. It didn't particularly bother her but it was a strong odor, something she didn't expect. The sharp smell of cleanness filled her nose when she took a deep breathe, the smell of rubbing alcohol or some type of disinfectant. It was comforting and fresh, both things that her recent places of living have been lacking. Not that she would ever tell anyone where she had been living.

The second thing that she noticed was that she wasn't wearing her clothes. While she wasn't complaining the gown type thing she was wearingwas sort of comfortable. There was a small nagging at the back of her mind that it was too cold to be summer day. But hey it beats the heat so she didn't question it much.

She also took note that she was in a bed. It had beenso long that she had slept in one that she didn't quite care that it wasn't the most comfortable bed.

She had never felt as tried as she did at that moment, she didn't want to open her eyes to see her surroundings, and she didn't want to figure out where the frilly hell was she. She didn't want to do much of anything expect maybe sleep some more. So she couldn't understand why anyone that could turn off that damn irritating beeping sound hasn't?

She just wanted to recede back into the dreamless dark for an interminable amount of time. Dreamless dark. The thing she is always striving for, she didn't know what she took this time but whatever is was it was good. She was going to have to find it again. She has to find it again.

She had almost drifted back to sleep when a very familiar voice began to speak.

"I know you are awake, Carmilla."

The sound was like a slap the face and brought her to full awareness. Oh Fuck Damnit, Carmilla thought. She had no choice but to respond to that voice. In that moment she realized there was nothing she could do to rectify her current situation. It hit her that she had to face the music that she had been running from for three years. There was no get out of jail free card, no point in faking it, no backing out.

But she could sure as hell try.

Carmilla lazily opened her eyes as she pulled a weak smirk and said "Mattie." Like she hadn't had slam the door shut yelling, like she hadn't had dump the blame on Mattie about something no one had control over, like she hadn't walked away.

To no one's surprised Mattie was going to having none of that bullshit, she narrowed her eyes to glare at Carmilla, "Don't. You. Mattie. Me."

Silence fell upon them as they took this moment to take in the others state.

Carmilla took note of how Mattie' s make up was a little ruined, how her hair was messy and up in a ponytail, how she was holding a cup of coffee like it was a lifeline. Mattie looked worn out, Carmilla figure that she had probably been waiting a long while for her to wake up.

Though even through Mattie's tiredness Carmilla could see the changes. The shy and easy going girl she had known couldn't be seen instead that aura had been replaced by waves of power and confidence telling her that Mattie had harden. Carmilla could see it in the way she held herself, the straight posture, how her head was raised, the steady unwavering glaze that seems to be analyzing her.

Yes Mattie had harden and how could she not. Carmilla had left, leaving Matska and Will in Mother's grasp. And if Carmilla knew Mother, and boy did she know her well, it was that Mother had most likely had tightened the leash on both of them. The only thing that told Camilla that the girl she used to know was still there was the soft light in Mattie's eyes that seem to be saying sorry.

It was that silent message the made Carmilla notice where she was, in a hospital. Carmilla widen her eyes as she took in her surroundings, well now the stupid beeping made sense.

She had fucked up, she had OD on who knows what and ended up in a hospital. After being so careful for three years, making sure she didn't leave traces, basically living off the grid. One freaking OD changed that.

They had found her when she wasn't ready to be found. Carmilla knew that she couldn't have hidden forever and took she defeat quietly. At least Mother sent someone she could tolerate to have a decent conversation with.

"The vagabond lifestyle suits you," Mattie says curtly. "As does almost dying in a ditch, doesn't it sis?"

Mattie was going to play it cold, Carmilla thought, well two could play at that game. "Almost as well as your role in being Mother's retriever."

"Maman didn't sent me," Mattie said nonchalantly, dusting off her spotless skirt "but she, of course, knows where you are."

Carmilla frowned and opened her mouth then thought again frowned deeper closing her mouth. Mattie eyes eventually found Carmilla's and she raised her eyebrow. Daring Carmilla to insult, to denied, to speak.

"Carm," Mattie sighed "You have to stop being self destructive."

Carmilla looked away and found the wall very interesting that moment, "Is that mother or you speaking?"

"I'm not going to lie." Mattie started out slowly, "You have been... problematic for Maman," then she took hold of Carmilla' s hand between her own "But Carm I do miss the times before...everything came crashing down."

"Carm you need help there's the-"

"Help from who," Carmilla cut her off. "A shrink? Don't make me laugh."

"Ha, the great Carmilla Karnstein to a shrink" Mattie frowned "No. I know you would find that beneath you." She continued to look through purse until she found what she needed and pulled it out.

Carmilla stared at the pamphlet that Mattie layed on her lap. Her eyes didn't even try to skim the page instead locked on the big bold words reading 'Silas Psychiatric Hospital and Rehabilitation'.

"You could go willingly, voluntarily" Mattie said as she stood up and crossed the room to the trash can, "Or you could go back to the ditch they found you in." She threw her cup away as if to communicate to Carmilla what she thought if she chose the latter, Mattie would be done with her.

"Carm you might be the self proclaimed dark beauty of the world's rotting core," Mattie said smirking, "but..." She quickly somber up "I don't want to see you rotting away like this." she added quietly.

Soon exhaustion hit Carmilla deeply and she closed her eyes. All the years of running, of trying to fight, of knowingly losing her inner battle felt like they had caught up with her at that moment. Maybe, she wondered, just maybe it was time to learn to let go.

"Fine." Carmilla spoke quietly with her eyes still closed "I'll go."

"Finally using that brain of yours" Mattie chuckled softly.

They were in silence after that for a little until Mattie broke the silence once more, "I'm going to the hotel, to change and I'll see you when I come back."

"Go rest for a bit," Carmilla said tiredly "It's not like I'm going anywhere." With those final words Carmilla let sleep take her. That night sleep had allowed her to have a dreamless slumber. She didn't have nightmares of mother, or of crows, she didn't even have nightmares of Ell.