01. Arrangement
A dark cloud would never cease to dampen my dreams, shrouding them in an impenetrable wall of black, twisting and turning them into a void of unimaginable torment and pain. I would lie in my bed, writhing in pain from a darkness, a darkness I would soon become familiar with, as familiar as a mother to her child, a brother to his sister. A darkness, that at the time, I never understood. Screams, shrieks and war cries seemed to be the only audible sound echoing through my ears. I guess would could hardly call such things dreams, t'would seem more like nightmares, frightening ventures deep into my mind that I could never grasp nor figure why they'd rise.
A bard would tell me in my future t'would seem the Maker sent me a sign, visions of what would come to pass.
Apparently, The Maker was rather spot on.
I had awoken from one such nightmare, shaking and drenched in my own sweat, strong hands seizing my shoulder and pulling me into equally strong arms. The memory would never escape me, the last time in a very long time that a child would be held in her father's loving embrace. Sweet whispers that would assure me that all would be fine, that the dark things I saw were only brought on by urge to stay up late into the night, nibbling sweets with my troublesome cousins. 'Everything will be fine my little girl, silence your crying, your Da is here.'
T'would be the last time my father would cradle me in his arms as if I were still a young girl. Perhaps I'd always be the small girl running around the Alienage barefoot, hair pulled into wild pigtails, face covered with mud. To my Da I'd always be his sweet little sparrow, no matter how rough and boyish I passed myself off as.
I would always be his baby.
And he would always be my Da Da, no matter how old I grew.
His fingers were cool to the touch, brushing gently against my forehead as he tucked locks of brownish gray hair behind pointed ears. Though as disfigured as my right ear may have looked, Da had grown accustomed to it's mis-shape long ago. Truthfully, both of my ears should be pointed, as all elf ears would be in Ferelden, however due to...'incidents' in my childhood, my right ear missed it's point, jagged pearly scars marking where the point should be. How such a thing happened...t'would be saved for another time.
"My little sparrow, I thought we were past these fits of yours! Especially with you being so old!"
Like I had always done in my past, I squirmed from my father's grasp, acting appalled by his display of parental love. Once free, it was time to wipe my forehead free of sweat and to not acknowledge my Da's statement. It was true, I hadn't had such a fit since I was but a little girl. But there were nights they would come back, slipping themselves in quietly, forcing me to be silent and still, as if an Incubus was perched atop my chest, holding me down. But what would an Inucbus want with me? I was nothing more than a haughty young lass of Elven blood, I was of no importance, to the heavens or the demons.
Da's eyes were full of concern, boring into me as if he was trying to search my soul for the meaning of such fits and terrors. But alas, as usual, the man would find naught a thing and would be left with nary an answer, but more questions.
"Please Da, concern yourself not. I'm fine, I always am."
Not wanting to force the issue, the man shrugged, patting his little girl atop her head, a crooked smile upon his face. "Well then, if the little one is done, it would be in her best interest to hurry out of bed, today is a very special day and we wouldn't want her to dawdle, now would we?" The smile grew wider as he gazed upon his daughter, this was a proud moment for him, the day his little sparrow became a woman. He arose from the bed, turning and heading towards the linen closet, shuffling through the extra blankets and rags.
Of course, I was utterly clueless. Apparently my mind had slipped whilst I suffered through my nightly delusions. What could he mean? 'A very special day.' Mind utterly blank, wrinkles of frustration setting between my brow, I opened my mouth to speak as my father let out a laugh from the closet. Figuring it would be best to just force myself from my bed, I did so, setting bare feet upon cold wooden floorboards. Leaning forward, my eyes searched for what my Da searched for, wondering what it was that was giving him such delight riffling through the linen closet.
As I stood to gaze over my Da's shoulders the front door to our small home nearly flung off it's hinges as it was opened with a rather tremendous force. Startled, I looked towards the door, expecting to see the King's Army storm in. Did I need to prepare myself for a fight!? However, where there should be a strong force of knights, all there was to be seen was the thin frame of another Elven woman, short fiery red hair adorned with many tightly wound braids. Her eyes were slightly glazed over and as she approached with a broad smile, the stench of whiskey was apparent.
"Dear cousin! You've awakened at last! Now we can party at last!"
Casting blue eyes towards the ceiling, a wave of mild disappointment washed over me, "Shianni...my dear cousin, do you really need an excuse to start drinking?" Sniffing the air about the girl, leaning close, "Apparently not, how much whiskey have you drank? You didn't clean out the shop did you? Other people do like to have a drink after a hard day of scrubbing the scum off of human floors you know."
Shianni let out a snort, rather unfitting of her, but in her mild drunken stupors, she couldn't help but let out the odd noise. Waving her hand towards me, as if to wave off the comment that I had thrown to her, Shianni let out a giggle, "Cousin, why aren't you excited? You should be glowing right now! I'm so envious of you!" she whimpered after her cries, leaving me as confused as my dear Da had.
The look that my dear cousin had given me after my awkward silence was...comical to say the least. "Oh darling Aislynn! Please tell me you didn't forget what today was...did you?" More silence, "By The Maker cousin! You're to be wed today! How could you possibly forget about such a momentous occasion!?"
Upon the mention of wedlock, my heart sank deep into my stomach. The very thought of it made me ill, I tossed a glance over my shoulder to my Da, happily humming to himself ignoring the current conversation. I loved him, I did, but a part of me felt utterly betrayed by this...ghastly union against my will. An arranged marriage was the last thing I had ever wanted, yet here I was, standing dumbstruck by the notion on the very day I would be forced to through my life away. Maker's breath...Why were some parents surprised when their daughters ran away from their life of a prospective bride?
Why hadn't I run away?
Oh goodness!
"Where's Soris!?"
Shianni eyed me suspiciously, folding her arms over her chest, "He's outside somewhere, dressed in his finest of course...I suppose he and a certain someone were planning an...escape? Hmmmmmm?" Quickly I shook my head, the bastard had been caught! Curse him, now how was I to escape? Letting out a heavy sigh, Shianni shook her head, "I don't see why you're so upset by this. I would feel utterly honored to be getting married today! Especially with such a good looking fellow like yours." She smirked, playfully hitting my arm, "Oh, that's right, I snuck a peak at your groom-to-be, goodness cousin, you've gotten quite the man! So handsome!"
With a narrow gaze I spoke, unhappily, "Then you marry him..."
"Oh I gladly would! But I don't think your father would be much pleased with that...Anyway," she glanced back at the door, "I need to head off, let you get ready so I can make sure Soris doesn't attempt to run off again. I'll see you later dear cousiiiiiiin!"
Groaning, I dragged myself to the old dining table, throwing myself into one of the old, sturdy chairs as I often did when I was unhappy. Face buried within my hands, I felt like screaming at that moment. Fortunately Da had found whatever it was he had been looking for, with a soft thud upon the table, I lifted my face from my hands only to find myself looking upon a folded pile of white...and wonderfully crafted boots. Looking up to Da, speechless, he smiled.
"They were your mother's. I think she would be proud if you wore them."
I tried my best to muster a thank you, I truly did, but my stubborn ways would only allow me to speak other words in a weak cracked voice, "Please don't make me do this..." It was pathetic, to say the least, attempting to ask my dear Da to not force me to marry. I knew that it would be all for not as everything had been said and done, but it was still worth a try right? Perhaps he'd have a change of heart...maybe?
But it was not to be had, the smile upon Da's face seemed to fade in the slightest, leaving me to feel absolutely horrid about what I had asked. He turned from me, walking towards the window to gaze outside at the gathering friends and family, "I'm sorry my dear, but it's tradition. I've already payed your dowry, your husband-to-be has arrived early...your marriage will bring us honor."
Biting my tongue, I sat quietly, afraid that I would say something that would anger him. However he turned back to face me, "Your mother and I were in an arranged marriage, and yet we still found happiness and eventually...love."
I cast my eyes away, feeling a bitter anger well up within me, "Until the humans slayed her..."
Shaking his head, Da walked away from me and left the house. A signal for me to get ready for the 'festivities' to come...