Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds, the characters or the song. All rights go to their respectful owners. I'm just barrowing them for a while.
Spoilers: Spoilers for season 6 and the season 7 final.
I Saw You Die
You tell me the laughter's come and gone but I'm okay with that.
I keep my defences safe and strong and I'm not turning back.
There has been little laughter and smiles since we found out that you're leaving us, again and I'm okay with that. This way I don't have to pretend to be happy. I keep my defences safe and strong so I don't end up getting hurt again and I know that it's wrong but there's no turning back now.
I'm standing here with fractured hope,
And all alone with words unspoken.
I keep all of my emotions in check and I'm here with fractured hope that you'll come back to the team, to me someday. You're leaving me alone when I have so much more to say to you. You're leaving when there are so many words that haven't been spoken yet.
I saw you die, in front of my eyes
I watched you fall without a choice.
How could you think that I want you to leave after I just got you back? God Emily, I thought that I saw you die right in front of my eyes. I thought that I saw you bleed out to death. I watched you fall and slip away without a choice.
To hear you breathe, what I wouldn't give
to have you here with me.
You don't and won't ever know what I would've given to hear you breathe when I thought that you had died. I know that you didn't have a choice and now you're now doing what you have to do but you don't know what I would've done to have you with me, then and now.
I should've known by the look on your face, but I was too blind to see
the fire slowly turned into pain, I walked for miles trying to find my way.
I should've known by the look on your face that something wasn't right. I was too blind to see it when Doyle happened and I've been too blind to see what you've been really thinking since you got back. The fire that I feel in the pit of my stomach whenever I'm around you is slowly dying and now turning into pain.
Still standing here, I'm not improving,
Faced with fear and I'm not moving.
Now I'm still standing here waiting and wanting you to realize that you don't need to be in London. I know that it's selfish and not right but I can't help what I feel and something tells me that this feeling won't be improving anytime soon. When I'm next faced with fear I won't flinch, I won't be scared and I won't move because I know that nothing's going to be as bad as losing you for the second time.
AN I was on YouTube today clicking random songs and I found this one. As soon as I heard it I got this idea. This is not Beta'd so any mistakes or things that don't make sense are mine. Anyways, thanks for reading and please click that blue button.