This is the first time I've ever posted a fanfiction. After years of reading from the site I decided to finally give it a shot. My aim with this fic is to write a fun, ridiculous story about the lives of the characters across the Super Smash Bros. universe (whilst still keeping the focus primarily on a small cast of smashers). It may feel cluttered at first but everything will sort itself out as chapters go by. Don't take anything here seriously, this is gonna be a ride.

First Impressions

Beautiful bright shades of pink, blue, and yellow intertwined to craft the morning sky. The sun slowly rose behind the beloved Smash Mansion, the residence of the iconic characters from Nintendo's Super Smash Bros. Melee (the one on gamecube because every other game sucks ass and penis) (but for the sake of storytelling I'm using the characters in their smash 4 appearances because fuck man). Pit awoke from a deep slumber in his bed, dark circles indicating immediate drowsiness….and a wet stain on his bed sheets indicating…

"Gah! I...I had a wet dream? How could this be?!" Pit jumped out of his bed, immediately feeling his genitals rub against his damp undergarments. "Oh no!" the innocent angel let out a little bitch anime girl squeal. "I-if Lady Palutena finds out I've been thinking about rawing Link again, she'll turn my penis into an eggplant! Or worse…" Pit cupped his crotch in fear and ran into the bathroom of his room. The entire room consisted of a single bed large enough for two people (but used by one), a shitty laptop with 98 GB of Sailor Moon episodes (sub and dub), a desk that proudly displayed said laptop, a chair to go with it, a TV (no cable because fuck those prices), a diary filled with fantasies of his beloved Link (Pit has yet to confess though) and a bean bag chair.

Pit scrubbed his groin vigorously for 20 minutes with a washcloth until he heard a knock on his door. The white angel blushed furiously and forced a pair of pants on. He was equipped with a basic white t-shirt and sweat pants, now ready to face his unexpected visitor. He opened the door and time froze, along with his heart beat.

At the entrance stood a tall, handsome young man, with blond hair that graced his beautiful facial features. His gorgeous, deep blue eyes, and his sharp, fierce yet calm eyebrows that emitted an intense stare. Not to mention those long elf-like ears, pierced on either side that drove the angel mad. Pit stood, mouth agape, eyes fixed on his visitor's gaze.

"Uhh...Pit?" Pit jolted at the comment and came back to his senses. "A-ah! Heh heh Link! Y-You're here! Y-you…" Pit got even more flustered and clearly had a rough time spitting what little pieces of speech he could muster out. Link smiled his signature heroic smile. Pit's stomach felt fuzzy. "I asked if you knew where Dark Pit was. Are you alright?" he chuckled. Pit froze, realizing he had been too busy drooling over his crush's face to fully register he had actually asked him a question upon arrival. Not only that, but the angel was immediately overcome with jealousy at the swordsman's inquiry. "Wait, P-Pittoo? What do you want from him?!"

Cut to another room, where the once-fierce rivals Mario and Bowser are now in a romantic, sexually active relationship. I don't fucking ship this it just made me laugh. "Ayo Mario I brought carcrash bandicuck for us to play when we have a sleepover. Bandicunt. Bandicooties," Bowser had a copy of Crash Bandicoot N Sane Trilogy in one hand and his cock in the other. Mario stared. Not at the award-winning, critically-acclaimed masterpiece that was Crash Bandicoot N Sane Trilogy, but at the microscopic, pea-sized weiner throbbing in the palm of the koopa's massive scaled claws. Mario felt his nether regions engorge, but he decided to save the homoerotic activities for another time. The portly plumber propped his boots on the coffee table in front of the couch, where he sat with his usual calmness. Bowser continued jerking as he sat his fat ass down, taking a huge toll on the cushions. Mario leaned his head on his mountain of a boyfriend. The two lovers spent their free time together watching reruns of Kick Buttowski on Disney XD while masturbating. All in all, it was a beautiful relationship. Penis hahaha.

If I end up formatting this wrong fuck me. Anyway outside the mansion were the two scoundrels Wario and Waluigi. Waluigi still isn't in Smash and he shares a room with Wario illegally. "Waluigi what are we doing" Wario said, shoving a six-inch black dildo up his rectum out of boredom. "I'm becoming a pirate" the purple brother announced. "I'm gonna sail the seven seas and piss in the bermuda triangle, that flat-earther liberal conspiracy bullshit. I also have a portable dvd player where we can illegally download Incredibles 2 and watch. You in?"

Wario shoved the nigerian cock so far up his ass that blood started dripping from it. "Count me in!" "Alright, but first we'll need to garner money for ship supplies. We can probably find odd jobs to fill up our story arc. Any suggestions?" Wario cocked (lol) a devious grin.

On the opposite side of Smash mansion sat a porta potty. Ness occupied it, binging on the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series. "Greg is such an asshole," Ness said aloud. "I'm not reading anymore of this." Ness exited the porta potty.

Back inside, Peach has an appointment with the nurse. "I thought nurses had to be girls lol" the blonde princess remarked. Dr. Mario rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Princess, please take care of yourself out there."

Princess Peach, having healed her minor arm wound thanks to the doctor, went on her way back to her room. It was only six in the morning, so she had to be careful not to wake anyone. Few smashers ever bothered getting up before 10.

As the hours passed, the cast showed their true size and started bustling through the halls of the manor. At 12:00, Smashy Time officially began. Endless fights, both for fun and for glory, everyone beating each other senseless all in good fun, forced applause from losers as the winner stood in all their pride. This was what Smash Bros. was all about, and we'll only continue to observe the morally decaying state of the fighters' lives from here on out.

To be continued OOOOO