Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, do not own these characters. I don't really own anyone, since, it's, you know, against the law. I own a dog though, two dogs, actually. And my sister owns a virtual cat, but she's allergic so we don't have a real one. Well, no, that's not true, her virtual cat died after I stuffed in the back of her pajama drawer so that I couldn't hear the annoying beeps anymore. And I did make up some of Leah's friends.

I know Leah's not really nice, but I still wonder what she's thinking. So, I'm definitely not the first one to do this, but here's Leah's story, how I see it.

Thinking

"I'm sorry, Leah." Emily tried to soothe me, but it wasn't helping my involuntary tears. I had tried to be silent and stop crying, but the tears just kept running and to stifle my sobs I had to stop breathing. It didn't seem like such a bad idea, actually. I could hear Heather's voice in my ear, though, and it changed my mind. I think I'll play the suffocation game tonight, she had said. I hadn't thought she was serious, and by the time I realized she was, she was gone, forever, my best friend. Not my best friend, that was Emily, but Heather was close.

Now I had lost two people, Heather and Sam. Sam wasn't dead, not like Heather, but he didn't love me anymore, which was just as bad. That's exactly why, this once, Emily couldn't comfort me. Sam loved her, and she had said it was unrequited, but I'd seen the way she looked at him. I wasn't exactly mad at Emily. I had a hard time holding a grudge against her. And anyway, she had chosen to pretend she didn't love him for my sake, that balanced some of the anger I felt for her.

Eventually, my eyes dried out. No more tears would come. Emily had gone to eat, but I wasn't really hungry. I didn't feel like I had a stomach to put food in. I hadn't really eaten anything lately. I'd been thinking things through. My parents hadn't understood my need to lay on my bed and just cry, but Emily had. And it hadn't been hard to get Seth to leave me alone. I supposed I could go eat now, try to act normal, but did I have a reason?

For Emily. For Emily I would go eat something. It would make her happy. I might be able to tease Seth some, too, if I tried really hard. That would make Emily happy, she'd be glad to see me acting normal again. So, I forced my limp body off of my bed. There was a deep imprint of me and a more shallow one of Emily's arm in the comforter. I hastily smoothed it out, hoping to erase all of those memories. I once again considered the possibility of becoming an entirely different person, maybe just forgetting all my time with, I cringed at the name, Sam.

Walking out of my room, I called, "What's for lunch?" Mom, Dad, and Seth were sitting at our small table playing Monopoly. They all looked up when I came in. Dad stiffened and Seth looked afraid. I wasn't expecting my mom's reaction. She stood up and grabbed a paper plate.

"Hot dogs and macaroni." she flung the plate like a frisbee and I almost dropped it. I got a cup from the cabinet and poured some lemonade. I took heaping servings of macaroni, but only half of a hot dog. I sat down at the empty seat at the table. Seth watched me carefully as I took a bite of macaroni, his mouth slightly open.

Mom sat down next to me as I asked, "Where's Emily?" Mom froze for a brief second before grabbing the dice Dad held out to her. "Mom? Where'd she go?" Was she angry with me? Was she upset that I still loved Sam?

"She went to the beach. With Rebecca, Billy Black's kid? She's home for the weekend." she was smiling slightly and it looked wrong. Rebecca couldn't be home, she hadn't been planning to come home for another month. I ate in silence. Seth was winning the Monopoly game, but he didn't seem to notice. He was still staring at me. This had been a wasted effort. Emily wasn't even here to see my show. "Seth? Seth, it's your turn to roll." Seth's eyes snapped over to Mom.

"Sorry, spaced out." he muttered. He looked like he was paying attention to the game, but I could see his eyes flicker over to me.

"I'm going to the beach." I announced. I grabbed my jacket and slammed the door on my way out. Because I knew Emily wouldn't be there. I knew my mom had been lying.

I walked down the beach feeling utterly stupid. Why had I come here? Where memories lingered? This had not been part of the new person deal, subconscious! I didn't agree to forget that fast! I'd never be able to forget, but I could try. And if I tried hard enough, I'd be able to ignore it. Eventually.

I swore and threw some rocks into the water. Eventually wasn't soon enough. "Leah!" Wendy called to me from down the beach. "Leah, what the effing hell are you doing out here? It's freezing!" Wendy was huddled into two jackets, her arms wrapped around herself. Kynda was standing next to her in a big winter coat. I hadn't really noticed the cold. It felt just fine out to me. I mean, it was raining, but it was always raining. I shrugged. They were walking towards me.

"'S'not that cold." I muttered. They had reached me by now. Kynda laughed. We stared at her like we always do when she acts weird. All the time.

"What? You said...snot." she cracked up again.

"Shut up, retard." Wendy whacked her upside the head. I smiled, slightly. It was good to be with my friends, even if Emily wasn't here. I hadn't seen them for two days. We'd had Friday off and I'd been home all of yesterday. "You want one of Kynda's coats?" Wendy asked.

"Coats? Plural?" I asked. Kynda opened her coat to reveal 3 unzipped jackets beneath. I laughed. "No thanks, I'm good." Wendy glanced at my jacket accusingly and I looked down too. My jacket was worn thin, very dirty, and it had multiple holes in the selves and on the back. "Okay, my jacket isn't in the best condition, but I'm not cold." Wendy laid a hand on my forehead.

"You aren't fever-warm, but you're warmer than me." she said. Kynda placed her hand on Wendy's forehead. I put one hand on Kynda's forehead and the other on Wendy's.

"You're both freezing!" They were cold, freezing was blowing it a bit out of proportion, but they were still cold. Wendy gave me a smug smile.

"What'd I tell you?" she asked.