Hey guys its Starfighter108 here. I know this is my first fan-fic. Well I hope you like it. I decided to do a song-fic. I do not own Gundam Wing. I also don't own the song 'Last Resort' Papa Roach does. I hope you like the fic, read and review.
Thoughts
""""Conversation""""
~~~Lyrics~~~
Last Resort
~Cut my life into pieces~
**Relena's pov**
Ever since I was little I had certain expectations that I had to live up to being, the daughter of the Dorlians. I had to be perfect and popular. But it got worst when I became Relena Peacecraft. Then the whole world was watching me. Now I am the Ex-Queen of the world who will never get to lead a normal life. Now I realize my life is no longer my own.
~I've reached my last resort~
~Suffication, no breathing~
~Don't give a f#@& if I cut my arm bleeding~
As I stood in the crowded ballroom full of people who didn't really care about me. I felt like I was suffocating and if I screamed no one would hear me. They hadn't heard my cries for help so far why would they hear me now. My last option was death. At that moment I didn't care what would happen to the future I just wanted death.
~Would it be wrong, would it be right~
~If I took my life tonight, chances are that I might~
As I walked away from the ballroom I thought about my family, friends, the Gundam pilots, and the world. Milliardo and Noin are my only family, and they would rather just have each other than have to look out for me. He was meant to rule anyway if I were gone he would get the kingdom, and he would have more time with Noin. As for friends I really don't have any friends. Oh sure I have those bubbleheads who only hang around me to hopefully get into the spotlight. As for the Gundam pilots they have their own lives now. Well the rest of the world…forget the rest of the world I gave up a normal life for them and peace, at least I should be able to rest in peace for the rest eternity. As I reached my room I went over to the balcony and looked at the stars. Would it really be wrong if I took my life tonight, because I might.
~Mutilation out of sight~
~And I'm contemplating suicide~
As I slowly closed my eyes the past came back to me.
:::Flashback:::
"Relena you are really Relena Peacecraft and princess of the Sank Kingdom"
"No I'm your daughter and no one else's" I began to feel his life fad as I watched again as the only man I had really known as my father died before me. I looked around again and I was in a battlefield with death and destruction all around. "No" I whispered as I tried not to hear the cries of those in pain.
:::End of flashback:::
~Cause I'm losing my sight~
~Losing my mind~
I'm going crazy
I thought as I walked towards my bed. All of the sudden, the room began to spin. As I reached my bed I thought I can't keep living this way.~Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine~
Maybe,
I thought if someone just tells me that I'm not going crazy it will be true. If somebody will tell me every thing is fine.~Nothing's alright, nothing is fine~
But it's not all right no matter what anyone says it's not all right.
I thought as I ran out of the room.~I'm running and I'm crying~
Tears came to my eyes as I ran out of the mansion and into the garden. The garden was the only place I could go sometimes to get any peace. I sat down on one of the stone benches and I started to think of when I first wanted to die.
~I never realized I was spread to thin~
:::Flashback:::
I was standing in my office with papers stacked every where and the phone rang every time I seem to put it down. "I have a ball to plan, a meeting to go to, these reports to finish, I haven't slept in two days, and I haven't had anything to eat since yesterdays lunch" I thought out loud as I answered the phone again. Oh great another meeting is scheduled next week well I guess my one day holiday for my birthday is canceled I thought.
~Till it was to late and I was empty within~
As I flopped on my bed for some well-needed sleep. I thought I have nothing left.
~Hungy feeding off Chaos and living in sin~
~Downward spiral where do I begin~
It's so hard
I thought I have to uphold my father's ideals but I don't truly believe in them. I seem to be on a downward spiral. I just don't want to have that dream again. I thought as I turned over and tried to get some sleep.~It all started when I lost my mother~
^^^Dream^^^
I ran through the burning mansion not knowing where my family was. "Mommy, Daddy" I screamed as I ran into another dead end. I have to get away from the fire its all around. I have to get out of here I thought as I ran over to a small table that held a vase. I took the vase, and threw it at the window making it crash. I have to get out I thought as I climbing through the window, the broken glass ripped up my skirt and scratched my legs. When I got outside I ran as far as I could, and when I turned around the whole mansion was in flames "Nnnnnoooooo"
^^^End of Dream^^^
~No love for myself and no love for another~
~Searching to find love upon a higher level~
:::End of Flashback:::
As I sat in the garden I remembered through all the years when I was growing up I could never find what I was looking for, true love.
~Finding nothing but questions and devils~
The older I got the more questions I remembered having and each question chased me like demons causing me pain. The worst question, was why do I always have to be alone?
~Cause I'm losing my sight~
~Losing my mind~
~Wish some body would tell me I'm fine~
I felt so lost sitting in the garden I didn't want to have to wake up tomorrow or the next day. I felt as if I was going absolutely crazy. I wish this would all stop and everything could be all right again.
~Nothing's alright, nothing is fine~
~I'm running and I'm crying~
No matter what I do it will not be fine. The only option is to end my life. I got off the park bench and back ran to my bedroom and pulled my gun out of its secret hiding spot. Looking at it for a short moment making sure that this is what I wanted. A small tear ran down my cheek. This is my only option.
~I can't go on living this way~
***Narrator pov***
Just then a shot rang out threw the whole countryside as the princess got her wish to be free.
Well I hope you like it. I know suicidal girl rears her ugly head. I hope to have more fics out soon. Please review and if you want you can email me at
starfighter108@email.com