I made this fanfict over a year ago, and the only reason I'm uploading it is 'for teh lolz'.
A lot of people on DeviantART like this fanfict because I bash so many characters (which is funny because I'm a red head in real life like Axel and yet he gets the most insults xD ) and so I thought you guys on would like it too.
Anyway, enjoy this bashing fanfict.
Disclaimer: KH © Square-Enix, and Disney. I do not own the characters
Zexion's alarm clock beeped and the owner of the device groaned. He rolled over in his king size bed and pulled the blanket over his head. A normal school morning for Zexion, sleep in, rush out of his house and get to school late.
The male groaned again as a female voice boomed outside his door. "Zexy? You awake? Get to school, if your late, Principal Xemnas will have your ass." The boy gasped as the name 'Xemnas' ran through his head. The principal hated Zexion and his friends, they were always late and always got in trouble. Nearly every day Zexion's mother or step father would have to enter school grounds and talk to the annoying Prison Warden.
The teenager groaned once again, leaning to the side and falling off his bed, landing on the ground with a thud. He pulled the sheets off himself and stood up, looking at his naked body in the mirror. 'Fuck, time to buy some boxers.' He thought in his mind, rubbing his sleepy face and yawning.
The boy walked over to his dressers, got out his only pair of clothes. A Slipknot shirt, black skinny jeans, a red tie and a studded belt and quickly got dressed, making sure he didn't forget anything. When fully dressed, the boy looked in the mirror again, "Fuck, forgot undies." He said, slapping his face and quickly waking up from the sleepiness. "Mum! I need more boxers." He called, pulling everything out of the drawers and throwing them on the ground, in desperate need of finding some underwear.
"Again? I'll go out today and see if there is any on special."
"Black please!" The boy called out again, muttering a few swears to himself after failing his task.
"Just go to school, hopefully no one will try and have give you a wedgie."
Zexion rolled his eyes, 'Not with Axel there.'
Zexion unlocked his door and ran out down the hallway, waving goodbye to his mother and grabbing a piece of buttered toast to go. He slammed the front door behind him, and quickly picked up his speed, to make it to school on time.
The boy's midnight black blue hair waved in front of his eyes, causing him to go blind every now and then, 'Fucking hell,' he thought, finally reaching the half way point.
"Whoa there, boy. What's your hurry, Shortie?" A voice called as the stranger grabbed Zexion's shirt collar, and pulled him back, making the black blued hair teen choke.
"ARGH, LET GO!" A pause followed as Zexion looked up to see a red figure tugging on his shirt. "Oh, Axel, sorry, I thought you were someone else."
"Ouch, Axey, your just like everyone else now." Another male voice said, who walked up to the red head and patted him on his shoulder.
"Heya, Demyx." Zexion said, still struggling from Axel's grip.
The blonde nodded and winked to Zexion. "Where's Marluxia?"
"Over here!" Another voice called from a distance. The three boys turned their heads to see a fully pink male walking towards them, a sparkle in his aquatic blue eyes.
"Geez, Mar Mar, wouldn't want a little blue on you, would you?" Axel commented, raising on of his short red eyebrows.
"Go fuck yourself, Fire Crotch."
"I would if I could."
Zexion and Demyx snickered at the reply, but suddenly stopped as both Marluxia and Axel glared at them.
"Mind letting go of my shirt, Candledick?" Zexion said, rolling his eyes.
The pyro let his grip loosen and chuckled humourlessly.
The four friends walked off, towards their school at a slow pace, talking mindlessly about girls, boys and Axel's eighteenth birthday party.
Reaching the school at about twelve thirty, the four boys walked into their PE class proudly, only to be screamed at by their teacher, Xigbar. "Jesus fuck, guys. You're coming at twelve now? You might as well stay fucking home."
"Would if we could, baby, would if we could." The pyro replied, not even bothering looking at the teacher.
Xigbar sighed and turned around, to face the rest of the class. The four boys walked slowly into the Men's dressing room and started getting changed.
Zexion took off his shirt and walked past the rest of his friends, to get a drink from the tap. Demyx gasped, "Holy shit, Zexion, you've got a good body there."
Axel and Marluxia turned around to glance at the body, only to join Demyx at the gasping,
"Whoa! Dude, you so work out." Marluxia yelled, a huge grin covering his face.
Zexion blushed and shook his head. "Never."
"Maybe it's all that running you do, please, if we never stop and start talking to you before school you would be a macho man." Demyx replied.
The three males all posed, god like and grunted in low voices, making Zexion roll his eyes.
The four friends all got changed and walked out of the dressing room, only to be welcomed by the teacher again, who smiled wickedly, "You know," he huffed, looking at his fingernails. Axel rolled his eyes while Marluxia and Demyx both looked away.
'Here it goes.' Zexion thought.
"I would of told you to not get dress since we are playing Hoops today, so it's shirt and skins, but you know, you never listen." Xigbar continued, keeping his eyes on his fingernails. 'Basketball, great.' Zexion thought sarcastically in his mind.
"Okay, well, all the girls be skins and the men will be shirts." Axel called out, clapping his hands and staring at all the girls.
All the males in the room laughed, including Xigbar, who suddenly stopped and slapped Axel across the head hard. "Har Har, Funny shit you got there, Axxxxxxel" He hissed on the word 'Axel' "No really, you should do stand up."
"Oh, I stand up alright."
The three friends behind him laughed, Zexion shaking his head at the joke. 'Good ol' Axel.'
Xigbar rolled his eyes and blew into his whistle, causing the blonde, red, black blue and pink teenagers behind him to cower and block their eyes. The teacher chuckled and jogged off towards the rest of the class, grabbing the ball and throwing it to Hayner. "Women, on the left, boys, on the right. Oh! And boys, TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRTS."
The girls started whooping, cheering and jumping up high at the boys striping, Kairi's skirt rose and all the boys groaned at the sight, turning their backs and slowly taking off their shirts. Axel was the first to strip, his body sweating from the fire inside him, he grinned and winked at the girls and strolled off, towards the ball.
Zexion sighed and ripped his top off and walked over to his friends, a small grin on his face. The girls in his PE class all stood and stared at his 'hot new body' while, the boy didn't notice.
Lunch time, the time where all the students could do whatever the fuck they wanted. Axel, Demyx and Marluxia bought two packets of Mentos and ten bottles of Coke while Zexion, stood there, in the cafeteria with his hands in his pockets and watched his buddies mess around.
"Watch and learn, amigos, these babies will fly!" Axel said, his voice becoming all high.
"Oi, Ranga, how much weed have you smoked today?" Marluxia asked, while getting the experiment ready.
"Well, I'm not the one with pink hair, Pixie."
"Better then having a fire crotch ." Marluxia mumbled, Demyx laughed and quickly stopped when Axel gave the water boy a death glare.
The four boys got into position, and each took two Mentos in their hands. A wild crowd of students formed a circle around them, watching eagerly. They all unscrewed the bottles and placed the lids on the dirty floor, close to their hands, making it easy to pick up.
"Three, Two, One, GO!" Demyx shouted and the four boys all quickly threw the Mentos in the bottles and quickly screwed the caps back on.
"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Marluxia screamed, like a girl and dived under a table. The bottles shook aggressively. The Principal, Xemnas walked into the room and glared around, seeing everyone under tables and desks watching the ten bottles shake.
"What's going on he—ARGH!" He screamed, ducking down as the bottles flew up and exploded in the tiny cafeteria. The students all cheered and jumped wildly when the last bottle got the next teacher to come through the door right in the face.
"AXEL, DEMYX, MARLUXIA, ZEXION! MY OFFICE! NOW!" The principal screamed, his face going red with rage.