Standard disclaimers apply. I own nothing but my computer, and even that is conditional.
There is not really much to do while they wait for the TARDIS to be ready for her first trip.
For awhile, they try working for Torchwood. But Rose hates paperwork more than Daleks and the Doctor has an unfortunate habit of activating strange alien machines and having them follow them home. After the first five explosions Pete explains that they'll be called if their expertise is needed, but that he would like to keep the building in one piece, thank you very much.
They try to travel for a time, but the parallel Earth is very similar to Rose's, so they've already seen a lot of it and get bored fast. New York and Europe are nothing after New New York and the Victorian era and the end of the world. Also, it's hard for the Vitex heiress to go anywhere without outrageous publicity, especially since this particular Vitex heiress had appeared out of thin air, disappeared again without a trace, and then brought her alien boyfriend from another universe back with her. They start staying in to avoid the awkward questions, not to mention the photos that invariably end up in the tabloids.
Most days they find themselves curled on the sofa in one of the rooms of the Tyler mansion (and Rose just can't get over how posh that sounds), curled up in front of the tv and letting the voices wash over them. The Doctor says the background noise helps his mind feel less empty. Rose is just glad of his hand in hers.
"I love you," she tells him suddenly. They don't usually talk much in the mornings, because their conversations have a habit of becoming deep and dark and neither of them want that so early, but she feels that it's important he realize that. He's been happier the longer they've been away from him, but she still senses an overpowering sadness enveloping him sometimes. The dialogue from the speakers can't cancel out the loneliness and self-loathing he was left with when he was literally ripped in half.
He just nods. His gaze is somewhere up and to the left of the screen, so she switches it off. He doesn't appear to notice. His eyes have hardened, and he's not looking at anything in particular – just very decidedly not at her.
There's the darkness creeping in.
"Please, Doctor. What is it?"
"I hate myself, you know."
She pulls away and stares up at him. Of course she knows, but that doesn't mean she's okay with it. They have to move on, together. "Don't you say that. Why?"
"You should, too. If it wasn't for me, he would have taken you with him."
"You are him."
"Not to you."
But he is, she realizes suddenly, the first time she's consciously thought it even if she has been feeling it for awhile. This is the Doctor. Her Doctor. And even if the fully Time Lord Doctor came back – which she knows he can't – it wouldn't be the same as it had been before. This Doctor is the one she's fallen even deeper in love with now. The other Doctor must have moved on.
She lays her head on his chest, where she can hear his single heart beating steadily. He moves to push her away.
"Don't. It's weird." He means his heart, she knows. He still can't reconcile his Time Lord brain with his human body.
"It's just right," she says. He snorts but doesn't argue – he knows she'll never give up on that argument. They sit in silence again, him staring at the wall, her studying his too-thin face in concern.
Suddenly his face brightens.
"Doctor? What is it?"
"I can– I can hear something, Rose." He puts a hand to his head, scrunching his eyes. "It's very faint, but it's there. It's the TARDIS!"
"She's awake?"
He nods, looking almost afraid to believe it.
"Is she ready? Can we– can we go see?"
He jumps up, taking her hand in his. "Of course we can, Rose Tyler. Allons-y!"
It's months later before there comes a day where they'd rather sit on the sofa again than travel to some unexplored corner of the universe. The Doctor says the TARDIS needs a break – after all, she's still young. Rose gets the impression neither of them are entirely used to this lifestyle any more. And anyway, Jackie misses them. Or so they thought, before she left them alone to attend some party one of Pete's associates was hosting downtown.
They leave the TARDIS in the yard behind the mansion and silently resolve to do Earth things. Like watching tv. And eating chips. But because they're them, it doesn't take very long before they start to contemplate the universe again.
"Where are we going next?" she asks.
"Oh, I don't know," he says, grinning and feeding her a chip. "Wherever you want."
"Maybe–" She stops herself. What she had been about to say was undoubtedly dangerous. Only now she has his attention, and a curious Doctor never lets anything go.
"Maybe what?" His voice is whiny, and he pokes her side. He knows something is wrong when she doesn't even giggle.
"Never mind." She shakes her head. "It's– It's stupid."
"Come on, Rose. Nothing you say could be stupid. I took you to see the FrontAlley Guys, for Rassilon's sake, and barely even made fun of you! And I thought the Backstreet Boys couldn't be worse in any universe! Can it get more ridiculous?"
"Gallifrey," she says quickly, quietly.
"What?" He thinks that maybe he misheard. Not only is his planet not ridiculous, it's definitely not something they bring up in conversation.
"In this universe, it might still exist," she clarifies quickly, not liking the shadow that passed over his face. "We could visit it, if you want. You could see if there are any similarities."
"Nope." He forces a smile, but she can tell he's faking. "No Gallifrey in this universe. And even if there was, I wouldn't bring you there, anyway."
She's hurt. "But I thought you said it was beautiful. Don't you want me to–" She cuts herself off. "Never mind. I don't belong there anyway."
He bumps his shoulder into hers, trying to get her to smile. "It's not like that. I'd love for you to see it. I just don't think the other Gallifreyans would appreciate you like I do."
"Oh?" Her tone is challenging. "And why's that?"
He scowls. "Humans weren't allowed on Gallifrey."
"Oh. So this . . . This would have been wrong?" She gestures vaguely to them, their shared house and experiences and life.
"Basically. I would've been . . . Frowned upon if they could see me now." That's putting it lightly. "I guess even I wouldn't be allowed there now. Unless they were studying me. What with the metacrisis and all. That's weird."
He can't tell if she's offended or not. He hopes she isn't. He certainly didn't make the rules, and he's broken most of them by now, anyway.
She frowns for a moment. And then she seems to accept it, just like that, and she's happy again. Her tongue pokes out the side of her teasing smile.
"I can't believe you getting involved with a human would have been looked down on. You've had so many human companions." She snorts. "You really are a rebel, aren't you."
"Hey." He pokes her again, and this time she does laugh. "At least I never attempted to romance the Face of Boe. Now that's weird by anyone's standards."
"What?" She looks at him incredulously. "I most certainly did not. Just because I brought a few old boyfriends aboard the TARDIS does not mean I tried–"
He shakes his head, grinning. "The things I could tell you. About a certain captain you took a liking to."
"What, Jack?" She pauses a moment as her brain connects the pieces, then shakes her head in disbelief. "The Face of Boe? You think I'm gonna fall for that?" She snorts, then meets his eyes, and her jaw drops. "You're bloody serious, aren't you."
His wink is anything but, but there's an undertone of honesty to his teasing. "Well, he is basically immortal. Now that'll be a story to tell the grandchildren."
She stops dead, drops the chip she'd been about to throw at him.
The Doctor immediately panics. Rose has been so temperamental since she was left here again; it doesn't take much to set her off. He doesn't exactly fancy sleeping in the hallway again. "What? What did I say? Look, I know you miss everyone, and I'm sorry I brought Jack up–" Though parallel versions of many other Torchwood employees worked with them in this universe, they hadn't been able to find any version of Jack Harkness.
"You said . . . You said grandchildren." Rose's voice is low and laced with disbelief.
"What?" He shrugs, looking slightly alarmed. "Oh, no! You know. Not that we – because I don't know – What with Tony and–"
"How human are you exactly?" She cuts off his rambling abruptly. Rose Tyler was never one to beat around the bush.
He lowers his eyes. "I have no idea."
"Well then."
"But it might – If we –And I mean, not now. But someday . . . Once we've seen all there is to see in this universe . . . I could find out. Maybe."
She turns away, but he can see a hint of a smile. "Kids. Isn't that a little domestic for you?"
"Domestic? I am an expert at domestic! Look at us! We have a house!"
She glances pointedly around. "We have a room. In my mother's house. And only because the baby TARDIS isn't fully grown yet."
He runs a hand through his hair, making it stand up even more than it already was. "I think we could do domestic. Someday. Do you reckon?"
In answer, Rose kisses him.
Well, what did you think? Remember, reviews are confidence-boosters!
Much love,
KnightNight7203
