Christmas time had never been festive for Arnold in the same way it was for other kids. His Grandmother tended to mix up the holidays, and so his Christmas had often become other holidays in the scramble of his Grandmother's mind. Everyone tended to go along with it until Christmas day when, no matter what holiday she thought it was, Pookie could be convinced to play Christmas carols on the sitting room piano of their old fashioned parlor. The wallpaper was extra-fancy in there, even if a little stained in places. The television could be easily moved to the wall to the accommodate a Christmas tree, and on this occasion it might not have to. That was because this year, Grandpa Phil had asked Ernie Potts to pick the tree. He and Arnold had come from an appointment to Phil's eye doctor to a startling sight. Phil removed his new glasses, rubbed them, put them back on, then said,"consarn it! The eye doctor must have got the prescription for my glasses all wrong! That Christmas tree there seems as big as a house!"
"Ugh, Grandpa, I don't think that's your glasses."
"Hi guys!" Ernie Potts waved to them from the window seat of his wrecking ball machine. The wrecking ball, thankfully, had been removed. The carefully poised tree had been chained to it instead. The other boarders were working to secure it with cinder blocks, stakes, and metal cables. "How do you like the Christmas tree I picked up? A real beauty, huh?!"
"Consarn it!" Grandpa Phil said, cross. "How in tarnation is that thing going to fit in the house, yah nitwit?"
"Well, we could keep it outside the house, Grandpa!" Arnold offered in hopes to bring back peace to his household. The idea sunk deep and immediately the two adults stopped their bickering, mercifully. Grandma Pookie pranced out of the house wearing elf shoes.
"North Pole, here I come!" she said with delirium. "Hum, I wonder how much pay Santa is offering hourly? Don't worry, Arnold, I'll prove him that I've got the stuff to be an elf! I'll be promoted in no time!" Humming happily, Arnold's Grandma propped a ladder up next to the tree and climbed it to begin hanging ornaments.
"Uh, Grandma?" Arnold asked at the sight of the tree. "Can I bring some of my friends to hang ornaments?"
"Of course, Arnold!" said his Grandma climbing down the ladder to hand Arnold the box. "Here! You go round up you friends. I'll go inside and bake some cookies for you all."
"Thanks, Grandma," Arnold smiled with content. He set the box down near the tree and strolled off to find his friends. Sid was lurking in an alley near his house, a rock in his hand aimed at a dumpster.
"Hey Sid!" Arnold said. The boy missed his throw, leading to some interesting sounds and cursing. "Do want to come by my house? We're putting ornaments on the tree!"
"Well, I could!" Sid said glancing down the alleyway. Stinky Peterson was there, too.
"Yeah, can I?" Stinky asked politely. Arnold swept his arm through the air like a rolling ocean wave.
"Of course! You're welcome, Stinky!"
"Well, alright!" Stinky said. They all strolled in the direction of his house. After Arnold had left his two friends at his house with the ornaments, he snuck off to see if anyone else was near.
"Gerald?" Arnold said on finding the boy at his home. "Are you doing anything today?"
"Well, yeah!" Gerald shrugged. The boy wore an apron. He had been mixing up a bowl full of waffle batter as Arnold had walked in. His mother was sizzling up a pan full of eggs on the stove top.
"Well, yeah!" said Gerald. "We're expecting some of my cousins to drop by! But if I have time later, I'll drop by!"
"Okay," Arnold stated flatly. That Gerald was busy was a bit of a disappointment.
"Not so, Gerald!" his mother said taking Gerald's apron. "I'll finish up here, Gerald. You and your friend go on!"
"Really? Thanks, Mom!" Relieved of his chores, Gerald hustled out of the kitchen and out onto his stoop. He pulled at the collar of his jersey.
"Whew! Relatives visiting is nice. But it sure gets a little hectic."
"Hm," Arnold said, his mind now in a faraway place. "I guess."
"Whaddya mean, I guess?" Gerald prompted. His sullen friend finally replied. "Well you remember my cousin Arnie? Well, he'll be arriving tomorrow to visit."
"Aw. Again?!" Gerald fussed.
"It's only for two weeks this time. Honest!" Arnold said. "It won't be so bad!"
"Hm. So where's the tree?" said Gerald trying not to make an issue out of it.
"In the backyard," said Arnold. Both boys looked up. Harold Berman was hanging off the giant tree halfway up gobbling down the candy canes. The tree teetered and fell.
"Timber!" Ernie Potts cried as people scrambled away from the tree for their life.
"Hm," Arnold said as he observed the aftermath of chaos.
In the end, Grandpa Phil sawed the top of the tree off the oversized one and carried it into the house. The contrite renters cleaned up the yard and chopped the rest of the tree into kindling. But Arnold's friends gathered round the tree in the parlor to decorate it. Then Arnold heard a ring at the door.
"Ding-dong!" his doorbell rang. "Ding-ding, ding-dong!" Arnold swung open the door and poked his head out onto the stoop. Helga pulled his door open wide and swept past him. Phoebe scuttled after her like a tiny ocean crab.
"Alright, where's the tree ya called me about?!" the girl said stamping toward the living room.
"Right there!" Arnold said. With a smile upending her practiced frown, Helga took a string of tinsel from a box to hang. Then Arnold heard the doorbell ring. He returned to the door.
"Oh!" he said with disappointed shock. "You're early."
"Yup! Sniff!" his cousin Arnie snuffed. Pretending to be pleased, Arnold brought the boy inside.
"Alright! There's a room we're not renting out you can stay in. I'll help you get settled!" Arnie passed by the living room door.
"What's going on?" the boy said before snorting. Arnold's friends stared at the boy they all recognized from some months ago.
"Hi Helga!" said Arnie.
"Oh. Hi," said Helga.
"I can help decorate the tree!" said Arnie.
"Well, you can help if you want to," Arnold spoke passively. He held up some clusters of fake fruit on a string.
"Thanks," his cousin said.
"Um, so Arnold's cousin?" Stinky Peterson asked as politely as possible. "Are y'all coming to school with us tomorrow?"
"Two weeks," the boy mumbled while blinking, one eye at a time. Arnold distracted himself by taking a cookie from a plate and pouring himself a glass of milk.
"Well, I guess that sounds, dandy!" said Stinky. But why'all are you out here instead of wintering the holidays with your folks?"
"My folks thought it'd be good for me to keep Arnold company. So he's not lonely."
"Lonely?!" Arnold sputtered out, spewing the glass of milk he had been drinking all over the floor and down his shirt. He wiped his mouth with the back arm of his shirt. "I'm not lonely! You don't have to feel pity for me!" Arnie blinked his disturbing one-eye-at-a-time-blink.
"Well, we'll let ourselves out," said Stinky Peterson. "We'll see ya tomorrow at school Arnold!"
"Yeah. See ya, ol' Arnoldo!" Helga said stamping out. Arnold watched the girl he had a soft spot for go, then closed the door shut softly behind her.
"Do ya wanna play parcheesi?" Arnie offered.
"Hm," Arnold said, seeking the strength of patience inside himself that he needed.