AN: Hello all, welcome to Altered Perception. I was originally going to publish this along with the update for Ancestral Awakening and Hogwarts Overkill, but due to a spider keeping me up for most of last night and a rather full weekend, I was unable to finish the new chapters and I decided to rather just post this now and then post those other chapters later this week... Man I'm tired.
To all my new readers, welcome. To those who have read my other stories, welcome back.
Truthfully, I don't know where this story will go and I wrote it in the spur of the moment, but I think it has potential to be interesting and funny... I can actually see this story branching out into crossovers later on.
Just one more additional note before we get to the story. Please enjoy... no, that's the note... seriously... why are you still reading the author note instead of the story... seriously, the story is right there, get to reading already, I think you will like it... Aaaaaaaaand start.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, it's so sad that I don't own it, but I had to tell you that, rules and whatnot.
Chapter 1: Eyes wide open
A young dark haired boy scowled as sweat poured down his face. Looking around the lake, the boy's sight landed on the spot where he once saw a kid his age master the jutsu he was currently working on. New found determination filled the dark haired boy as he went through the hand signs he was taught. "Tiger, Ram, Monkey, Boar, Horse, Tiger." The boy chanted, hoping to finally master the jutsu.
"Katon: Gokakyu no Jutsu." The boy yelled as he blew a small amount of fire from his mouth. Noticing the size of his fireball, the boy immediately stopped. "What the hell, it only took that other kid a week and this is my second week." The boy began, angry that he had yet to master the jutsu. "Shitty clan elders. Shitty Katon jutsu. Shitty coming of age rite." The boy ranted.
Wiping the sweat from his brow, the boy let out an exhausted sigh. Lifting up his arm, he took a sniff of his underarm, before recoiling. "I better get a bath at the hot spring." The boy mumbled. Walking away from the lake, the boy was lost in thought, wondering why it was taking so long for him to master the Katon jutsu.
Not paying attention to his surroundings, the boy accidentally bumped someone. "Sorry." He apologised as he glanced up at the person he bumped into. The boy took notice of the sunglasses and bandana that the man had on.
The man glanced at the boy, before walking off, ignoring the boys apology in favour of muttering something about a pervert.
"Shitty rude man." The boy muttered. Looking around, the boy realised that he was standing in front of the hot spring. The boy grinned as he realised that bumping into the rude man stopped him from passing the hot spring. "Lucky." The boy said, before entering the hot spring.
Stripping down to his boxers, the boy wrapped himself in a towel, before grabbing a bucket of water and a bar of soap. Rushing to clean himself, the boy poured the bucket of water over himself, before practically diving into the hot spring. "Aaaah, if only that Katon jutsu could be as simple as this." The boy let out a relaxed sigh as he resolved himself to enjoy the warm water of the hot spring.
The boys' peace was broken when he heard a man giggling at the wall that divided the male and female sides of the hot spring. "Just ignore him, he'll soon go away." The boy tried convincing himself. Closing his eyes the boy tried to ignore the giggling, but found that it was impossible.
The boy grumbled to himself as he climbed out of the hot spring. Walking towards the sound of the giggling, the boy found a white haired man, dressed in green and red peeking through the hole that divided the male and female section of the hot spring. "Oi, old man, keep it down will ya. Some of us came here to relax, not listen to you giggle." The boy began.
"Shhhh. Keep it down brat." The white haired man replied. "If they catch us, they're going to be pissed."
"Catch us?" The boy asked, not sure what the man meant by that.
"Yeah brat, catch us... and if they do, those women will do the most horrible things to us." The man added.
"Then why would you look through there if something so bad could happen." The boy asked, worried that the women would think that he was an accomplice.
The man sighed as pulled himself away from the hole. "Why do fish swim? The answer to your question is the same as the answer to my question." The man replied. Looking at the boy in front of him, the man realised that he still didn't seem to understand. "You know what... here... look." The man moved away from his spot at the wall.
"I don't know. You said that if we're caught, they will do horrible things to us... I'm not sure that it's worth the risk." The boy whispered, worried that the women on the other side of the wall might hear them.
"Just take a quick peek. They won't know that you're there and I promise that I will keep you safe if they do find out... It's your first time peeking after all." The white haired man reassured the boy.
Shifting nervously, the boy finally made up his mind. "Alright, but just for a second." The boy replied. Crouching in front of the hole, the boy steadied his breath as he slowly lowered his head towards the hole. Looking through the hole, the boy began to examine the woman's side of the hot spring. "All I see is steam... Wait, I see something moving in the steam. Is that what women look like without their clothes, they're bouncy... bouncy... bouncy." The boy chanted, hypnotised by what he was seeing. The boy let out a giggle that was unbefitting of a kid his age.
The white haired man smirked as the boy switched between muttering bouncy and letting out a giggle. "Alright, that's enough for now." The man pulled the boy away from the hole. Looking at the boy, he noticed that the boy had the largest grin on his face with a small amount of blood dripping from his nose. "So how was your first peeking experience? I know I still remember the first time I peeked." Realising that the boy was zoned out, the man shook him slightly.
"Huh, where am I? Where's my bouncy heaven?" The boy muttered, looking around.
The white haired man chuckled at the expression on the boy's face. "Don't worry kid, you'll have plenty of time to see your bouncy heaven in the future, but not right now... it's my turn to peek now."
"I have finally found you." A voice sounded from behind the duo.
Turning around, the white haired man glanced at the man that was preventing him from peeking, before turning back towards the wall. "Go away Ebisu, I'm currently busy with important research."
"Jiraiya-sama, I should have expected that it was you. Only one of your skills could possibly evade me." Ebisu began, before glancing at the boy standing next to Jiraiya. "And you have corrupted a youth... Do not worry young one, I will personally make sure that we take you to a Yamanaka to remove Jiraiya's corruption. Now follow me Jiraiya, it's time to face judgement for your crime of peeking."
Ignoring Ebisu, Jiraiya began to giggle as he continued to peek.
"I see that you will not listen to me. I am sorry Jiraiya-sama, but you have forced my hand." Ebisu apologised, before taking a deep breath. "YOU FIEND, HOW DARE YOU PEEK ON THE WOMEN'S SIDE OF THE HOT SPRING." Ebisu's yell caused the women to shriek as they rushed out of the hot spring.
Jiraiya sighed, annoyed that Ebisu ruined his good time. "Hey kid, get dressed, we're leaving." Jiraiya said, before turning towards Ebisu. With a speed that Ebisu couldn't follow, Jiraiya swiftly knocked him out, before dragging him to the wall. Jiraiya carefully positioned Ebisu in front of the wall, making it look like Ebisu was peeking. "That should do it." Jiraiya muttered, before calmly walking away from the wall. Walking into the changing room, Jiraiya found the boy dressed in a matching dark blue shirt and pants, he quickly tapped the boy on the shoulder. "Hey kid, there's just one more thing I have to do, before leaving." With a puff of smoke, Jiraiya was replaced by an average looking man with dark brown hair wearing a chunin vest. "Let's get out of here kid."
The duo walked out of the hot spring as calmly as possible, leaving just before a group of hastily dressed women rushed into the men's section. Listening to the screams of Ebisu, the boy resolved himself to never be caught peeking. Once they were far enough from the hot spring, Jiraiya released his Henge.
"Well kid, as I promised, I helped you escape. Next time, you will have to escape on your own." Jiraiya began. "I think I'll go check out the hot spring that's frequented by Kunoichi ... Man, the things ninja training will do to a female body." Jiraiya began to drool.
Still slightly shaken by almost being caught, the boy decided not to peek on Kunoichi. "I guess I'll just go back to working on my jutsu." The boy replied.
"Jutsu... Aren't you a bit young to be working on a jutsu?" Jiraiya asked, wondering what jutsu the boy in front of him could be talking about.
"No, the elders said it was a coming of age rite." The boy explained.
'Coming of age rite? Could this boy be related to... no, that's impossible, he doesn't seem to have the stick up his ass that all the others seem to possess, unless he hasn't developed the stick yet.' Jiraiya thought as he subtly examined the boys features. "Hey kid, what's your name? In case you didn't hear Ebisu, my name is Jiraiya."
"Sorry, I forgot to introduce myself, I was a little distracted by the bouncy, hehe... I'm Uchiha Naruto, It's nice to meet you Jiraiya." Naruto replied, remembering how the elders stressed how important it is to introduce yourself politely.
'Holy crap, an Uchiha that doesn't talk in grunts, this is rare... And he's on the path to becoming a pervert, this is just too good to pass up." Jiraiya thought as he considered his next move. "Hmmm, Naruto, that's a nice name. Tell you what, why don't I tag along, I'm sure I could help you with your jutsu."
"You could help me with my jutsu?" Naruto asked, sceptical of Jiraiya's offer.
"Sure thing kid, I'm one of the legendary Sannin. If I can't help you, I'm not sure who can." Jiraiya replied.
Considering Jiraiya's offer, Naruto nodded his head. "I think I once read about the Sannin being great ninja's. Okay, let's go to the lake." Naruto said.
After walking for a few minutes, the duo soon arrived at the lake. "So what do I do?" Naruto asked, looking at Jiraiya expectantly.
"Show me your jutsu, I can't help without knowing what's wrong with your jutsu." Jiraiya replied.
"Oh, right." Naruto muttered. "Tiger, Ram, Monkey, Boar, Horse, Tiger." Naruto chanted. "Katon: Gokakyu no jutsu."
Examining the small ball of fire that shot out of Naruto's mouth, Jiraiya signalled for Naruto to end the jutsu. "Okay, I think I might know of a way that will be easier for you. Try the jutsu again, but instead of using Tiger for the first hand seal, use Snake." Jiraiya suggested.
Shrugging at Jiraiya's suggestion, Naruto went through the hand signs again, starting with snake. "Katon: Gokakyu no jutsu." Naruto expelled a fireball three times larger than the one he attempted without Jiraiya's suggestion. Ending the jutsu, Naruto cheered at the vast improvement of his jutsu. "Did you see that, It was much bigger than my original fireball... How did you know that would work?" Naruto asked.
"I've met a few Uchiha that had a similar problem with that jutsu and all of them said that by replacing the first hand sign with either Tiger or Snake, the jutsu would be easier to use... Your parents must have forgotten to mention that when they first showed you this jutsu." Jiraiya explained.
Naruto's cheerful mood disappeared at the mention of parents. "I... I don't have any. The clan elders said they died on a mission when I was a baby." Naruto replied, looking to the floor.
Jiraiya sighed as he placed his hand on Naruto's shoulder. "Well kid, it's a tough world we live in. One moment we're here and the next we're gone, but we mustn't let ourselves be overcome by the pain of the past, after all, to be a Shinobi means to be one who endures and judging by the burn marks on your hands, you are working hard to become a Shinobi." Jiraiya gently squeezed Naruto's shoulder.
"You know, you and I are similar in a few things. We are both orphans from before we could remember our parents, we both enjoy peeking and in a few years, I'm sure you will enjoy sake." Jiraiya continued. "You know what, why don't you read this and tell me what you think." Jiraiya handed Naruto an Orange book. "Just don't let anyone else see it or they will take it away from you."
Feeling more cheerful, Naruto looked at the book quizzically. "What's that?" Naruto asked, wondering why Jiraiya was handing him the book.
"It's my novel, Icha Icha paradise. While I would normally not give this book to a child, I have a feeling that you will enjoy what's in it, especially with how you enjoyed the hot spring." Jiraiya explained. "While you're reading, try to imagine the female characters as those you saw in the hot spring."
Naruto cautiously took the book. "How will I tell you what I think of it if I don't know where to find you?" Naruto asked as he looked from the book to Jiraiya.
"How about we meet up, I'll be around the hot spring most afternoons so you could just find me there."Jiraiya replied, before noticing that it was getting darker. "Well, it's getting late and I still have some research to do. See you later Naruto." Jiraiya said, before disappearing in a puff of smoke.
Looking down at the book Jiraiya left him with, the words 'keep it hidden.' Echoed within Naruto's mind, before he placed the book in his pocket. "I guess I'll read it when I get home." Naruto decided. The thoughts of all the new things he experienced playing through his head. Remembering the wonderful bouncy that he saw in the hot spring, Naruto let out a giggle as a small amount of blood leaked from his nose.
An: There we go, Chapter 1 of a Uchiha Naruto that learns the art of being a super pervert from the biggest pervert in the show. I have a few ideas where to go with this and I'm not really sure what you will think of it... But it has to be done... Please Follow, Favorite and Review this story and maybe even check out my other stories.
To all those that say Naruto is too young to have a perverted mindset, let me just remind you that Itachi was said to have had the wisdom of a hokage when he was even younger, maybe I'll start a thing where Uchiha develop certain mindsets when they are children, Could you imagine Sasuke being overly obsessed with cleanliness. "I must avenge my clan... Oh no, I got mud on my clothes."
That's all folks. Kir c signing off.