Reflections

Holding my newborn son in my arms I can't help but cry tears that are of both joy and sorrow. As my son breastfeed's for the first time I close my eyes and reflect on everything that led me here to this hospital room with his father.

four years ago Michael Scofield walked into my infirmary and turned my world upside down with his charisma, charm, and his fervent need to reel me in. 2 and half months later I left the infirmary door open for him and opened a whole new can of worms. Three weeks later My father was dead,I jumped bail, went on the run with America's most wanted men, and fell hopelessly in love with Michael Scofield.

Our relationship developed slowly over the first 2 months on the run. Without fail Michael and I were always interrupted the few times when we were about to go from foreplay to full on Fuck me bitch orgasmic sex. After a while it seemed we'd never get there.

When it finally happened we had forgotten Linc was even in the room, asleep on his own bed. We were so caught up in our horniness that when Michael plunged into me I screamed..not in pain, but extreme pleasure. Michael cursed "fuck, shit, motherfucker, son of a bitch, God Sara God" all the while Linc lay there harder than a 2x4 not turned on by Michael, but by me..as he later put it I sounded like a porn queen. After experiencing orgasms of epic proportions we remembered Linc and Michael was completely and utterly embarrassed because we had not bothered to get under the blankets and he was literally mooning his own brother who was coming out of the bathroom we had not heard him enter when we were done.

As we headed for the border Michael would plan, plot, formulate, and analyze every possible outcome of what we were doing..it was those moments where I spent my time talking to Linc, getting to know him in a way that I never thought possible. And the first time Michael left us alone for half the afternoon Linc opened up a great deal.

He was nothing like his rap sheet made him out to be, instead he was kind, carrying, loving,respectful, funny, charming..basically he was a less complicated version of Michael. His baby brother that he valiantly proclaimed he'd take a bullet for. When Linc finally spoke about Veronica he became somber and reflective, saying that he had let her down miserably and that when she came for final visitation on the day he almost died..She had told him she loved him and it broke his heart. It broke his heart because she would have given him another chance to prove he was a good enough man for her to love and trust.

Linc broke down when he talked about the phone call in which he painfully listened as she was murdered. Feeling like he failed her by not protecting her and that he felt responsible for her death. I wiped his tears away then excused myself to take a shower so he could be alone. Not even 5 minutes after I got in Linc was there and though I protested he didn't listen..and I really didn't put up a fight because it felt..right.

Linc unleashed three years of pent up sexual frustration on me, leaving me bewildered, strangely satisfied, sore and unbelievably guilt ridden. We actually sat in the room a mile apart in silence, hating ourselves until an unsuspecting Michael returned an hour later. He invited me into the shower with him but I was hurting, and didn't want to give away any hint of what had happened...sitting with my legs closed was painful enough after having them splayed across the shower wall for an hour. That night Michael tried again but I denied him again saying I was too tired and really just wanted him to hold me..he did.

Linc and I didn't let it happen again, we both loved Michael dearly and hurting him was the last thing we wanted to do. We tried to not be alone together for too long and we both fought the nagging want, need, and hunger we had for eachother..we had to, no matter how bad it got, we had to for Michael's sanity. Eventually Linc and I got over eachother, to the point where we didn't have to fight the urges anymore, and I found myself blissfully happy with Michael.

2 years into our life on the run, we had made it to Panama, then swung back to Mexico and found refuge in Guadalajara, Mexico to be exact.. Once we settled into our small apartment Michael proposed to me and we married 3 days later in a small chapel just down the street. We were finally safe and well hidden, and well on our way to busting the conspiracy wide open with the revelation that the key I recovered from my father's body..the box it unlocked held a dirty little secret.

Enjoying life in Guadalajara we enjoyed being newlyweds by staying in our bedroom for 3 days with the exception of bathroom trips and a few trips to the kitchen. On the fourth day as Michael I continued our newlywed bliss, Linc had gone out to the store, on his way in he spotted Agent Kellerman on the street then agent Mahone in the lobby of our building.. He barged in on us while we were a little busy..no ALOT busy as we teetered on the edge of our orgasms. Blurting out that we were made didn't phase Michael one bit as he had a more pressing issue to contend with and that was me threatening to casterate him if he didn't finish me off. Linc had disappeared into his room packing what he could while Michael dutifully and forcefully brought us to our explosive orgasms...Then we got dressed and got the hell out of there sneaking out the fire escape.

We jumped into the car and took off, Michael was already thinking about where to go..we took refuge in a Park and formulated a plan, standing up to leave shots rang out and Michael tackled me to the floor. In the frenzied aftermath we got up and ran for our lives, Michael lagged behind us but kept up none the less.

An hour later we were huddled in a bathroom at the far end of the park, panic had set in amongst us, neither Linc or I Noticing Michael's condition until he slid to the floor in a sweaty heap leaving a streak of blood on his way down. struggling to breathe and fighting my attempts to save him he grabbed my hands...

"Sara its no use..its bile" Michael choked out

"Michael please don't..I need you so bad" I said sobbing as Linc wiped him down with a wet papertowel

"I Love you Mrs.Scofield, your the best thing to ever happen to me..you and Linc take care of eachother you hear, and Linc..I love you Bro" Michael spat out as he began to cough up blood

I begged him to to hold on, screamed at him, but all he did was wipe my tears with his weak hand, then despite the blood he kissed me pulling away just as he gurgled...He slumped forward his head resting my shoulder. With the little strength he had left he squeezed my hand tight breathing his last breath he spoke his last words...

"Finish It" Michael said

His body twitched as it shut down, a final gasp and he was still, his hand falling out of mine as I sobbed..Linc collapsed next to us and let out the most god awful blood curdling scream a man could let out as he grabbed Michael from me and cradled him in his arms.

"Mikey come back, please come back...I need you" Linc mumbled

4 days after I was married I was made a widow... pissed, angry and scorned I grabbed Linc's hand in that bathroom and told him we were going to finish this or die trying.
We had Michael buried in a local cemetery, promising him we'd bring him home as soon as we could. Once he was in the ground we took a three day severence to grieve for the man we both loved with every fiber of our beings.

On the fourth day we fired up Michaels laptop, the elaborate labrynth of his plan flashing before us. Piecing it together We boarded a plane to Chicago as Mary and Steve chatsworth platinum blond newlyweds on their way home from their honeymoon.

We snuck into the Cigar club...I emptied my fathers humidor and we went back to our hideout..listening to the tape and formulating the next step that would bring the dirty little secret the tape held out into the open.
Within three months we brought the company to its knees, geting our names as well as Michael's cleared.. even though I hadn't taken a test or seen a doctor I knew I was carrying Michael's baby.

When I reached the 5 month Mark, the new President.. James Walker awarded Linc, Michael and I the medal of honor for what we had done. When I gave my acceptance speech I spoke of Michael and how much he meant to me, then I was handed his medal and I lost it.

After that Linc and I tried to go our separate ways but naturally we gravitated towards eachother. Within a week I moved in with Linc and LJ who had since come home. Linc and I shared a shower or two until my belly got in the way.

On what would have been Michaels 34th birthday I gave birth to Aribella Malia Scofield. Her birth was bittersweet becuase the man urging me to push was not her father but her uncle Linc. Motherhood was wonderful though, and everytime Aribella looked at me with her piercing blue eyes I saw her father looking back at me.

6 months after I gave birth to her, Aribella was front and center as I married Lincoln Burrows. I became Sara Scofield Burrows, unable to drop Michael's name. Linc understood and he loved the fact that I went by Scofield Burrows.

We honeymooned in Guadalajara, and took Aribella to her father's grave where she spoke her first word as she tapped on his headstone...

"Dada" Aribella had cooed

Reduced to sobs Linc held me and then we made the arrangements to take him home. It took three months but we finally brought him home, The coroner taking a look at him and performing an autopsy that revealed nothing more than what we already knew. When the Coroner spoke to us he had said something that shocked us...

"I've never seen a human body in this good a condition after being buried for a year and a half..He is in such good condition you can see him if you like" The coroner said stunned

LJ had insisted upon seeing him, refusing to believe his uncle was dead until he saw him with his own eyes. Linc was against it but we all went in. I thought the Coroner was exaggerating how good Mchael's body condition was..but it was beyond remarkable...He was still him, his tattoo's were still prevalent and his face...well he looked peaceful. LJ broke down so bad Linc had to physically help him out of the room, I stayed behind and said goodbye to my first love, telling him I would never stop loving him and that I'll never let Aribella forget who her father was. We gave him a proper funeral that was harder than the first to sit through because now it was really real.he was laid to rest with his mother.

I like to believe Michael's anal retentive ways kept him from resting peacefully in Guadalajara and that he refused to rest until he came home...that he waited until he was home.

Three weeks Later Vee's body was found decapitated in a barrel in the woods...We buried her next to Michael a week after she was found.

Linc and I love eachother very much, but there are nights when I wake up crying for Michael and him Vee, we carry eachother through it though. We have so much tying us together that there's no one else we'd rather be married too except of course Michael and Vee.

On Aribella's first birthday I sat Linc down and told him I was pregnant..He let out an excited and blissfull... WooHoo and twirled me around. LJ of course was extatic upon hearing the news but kindly pointed out a tiny issue...

"So is it Aribella's brother possibly sister your carrying or her cousin?" LJ said bursting our celebration bubble

Linc and I looked at eachother and just laughed before he stated we he obviously knew I was thinking...

"Nobody needs to know they're half cousin half sibling thats our dirty little secret" Linc said as he hugged me

"Uncle Mikes too..because he's watching us you know and he's such a detail oriented freak that i'm sure he's up there analyzing this to no end" LJ replied

I wouldn't doubt that either and smiled at the thought of the other man in my heart sitting in this beautiful heavenly oasis analyzing this situation as well as each and every aspect of his oasis. I can't help but hope that when we all pass away we meet up in Michael's oasis.

This pregnancy went off without a hitch, Linc was a goofy dad and LJ was a goofy big brother in waiting..they set up the nursery and came to all of my appointments..Aribella reveled in all of the excitement.

The morning I went into labor, I hid it, my water hadn't broke so took the back pain and the minor contractions all morning without letting on to the boys I was ready to pop.
But at 12:15pm I couldn't handle it anymore and as Linc walked into the the bathroom where I was brushing my hair...my water broke.

With Aribella in LJ's care Linc rushed me to the hospital, more nervous than I was and i'm the one who was in labor.
Six hours later at 6:15pm I delivered Michael Lincoln Burrows. Linc sobbed when heard his sons name, thanking me for being me and loving him and his brother. But what he didn't know was that I was carrying twins, and while he left to call LJ I delivered the other baby.

Sitting with me, he held Michael, and I looked at him and wished him a happy Birthday because he was 39 years old and was holding one of his two birthday gifts from me.

"I have one more gift for you" I say softly

"What could be better than my little boy and his beautiful mother?" Linc asks

"A second chance to prove to Veronica your a good enough man to love and trust" I say with a smile

"I don't get it? did the labor make you sick?" Linc says putting his hand on my forehead

"No Silly" I say pulling the baby bed closer to me

"Then what on earth are you talking about?" Linc asks

I reach into the baby bed and scoop up our daughter which Makes Linc's eyes bug out...

"You get to Love Veronica again and be the man she knows she can trust with her life, and the man she already loves" I say handing him our daughter

"Sara..I" Linc stutters as tears start falling

"Veronica Alexis Burrows" I say tearfully

"She's beautiful..she's perfect" Linc says tearfully

"Yeah" I say hugging him

He pulls away from me and looks down at Vee, kissing her forehead

"Veronica Burrows I think i'm in love with you" Linc says cradling her

"Yeah your done" I say teasingly

"I promise I will be the good man and father you have always loved Veronica" Linc says bursting into sobs as the four of us hug

"Happy Birthday baby" I whisper

Everything we've been though, losing our first loves, our freedoms, finding justice, and finding eachother wasn't easy. I can look back on it all and proudly move forward in my life with Linc, Aribella, Michael, Vee and LJ. They are my life and my future.

I often reflect on everything and the outcome is always the same... Michael Scofield and Lincoln Burrows are my my passion, my air, my life, my bestfriends, my saviors, and my two great loves.