Yay I have finally gotten around to putting this idea into words! I've been thinking about it for a while so lets hope it turns out as good as I want xD
Warning this story contains Yaoi (Boys Love) if you don't like please don't read.
Disclaimer: I do not own Maximum Ride
Bitter Sweet
Chapter 1.
Iggy POV
I sat in the grass enjoying the feel of the sun against my skin. I had a tendency of doing things like this more often now that Itex was finally gone. When they were around I jut never had the time. Either we were always on the move or in to much danger to be out in the open. But now those days were over and hell I was gonna enjoy it. We had earned it if you asked me. Saving the world wasn't something any average Joe could manage! Now we all lived happily ever after with Dr. Martinez. Well kind of. Yeah we weren't being chased by murderous fly boys and erasers but I still had blind bird kid problems to face.
Like falling in love with my best friend for instance.
Yeah you guessed it I was in love with Fang. Believe me Fang was the last person I had wanted to fall in love with. I mean do you honestly think I want to be gay? I already am the blind one in the Flock, really I don't need anymore differences. But I can't help it. Everything about him is just so damn mesmerizing!
I'm not really sure what brought about this stupid crush of mine really. I guess after we had all settled down I had time to think about how much I loved to listen to Fang's few words, or concentrate on his soft breathing, and the gentle thuds of his heart. I guess part of me knew I was always in love with him but I was just to preoccupied to come to terms with my feelings. Not that it even mattered. Fang was to busy making googly eyes at Max. Do you know what it feels like to be so desperately in love with someone but all the while knowing they love someone else?
It sucks.
Sometimes I was even thankful I was blind so I wouldn't have to watch the two love birds. Not that it made much difference I mean I could still hear them. In some ways you could say that was worse. I love Max, she is the best sister anyone could have but her getting to hold Fang like I wanted to made me despise her. Its not her fault that they are practically perfect together. I mean you can't choose who you fall in love with. I'm living proof of that. Sometimes I wish I could just be what he wanted you know? I wanted to be the person he held until I fell asleep, I wanted to share long midnight talks with him, I just wanted to be with him.
Of course none of that would ever happen. Fang was perfectly straight and in love and there wasn't a single thing I could do about it. With much difficulty I was starting to accept that. Maybe one day I would find someone who could fill the holes in my heart. Sure they wouldn't be Fang who I longed for so much, but I could find someone to make me happy. Right?
There was one last thing I wanted to do before totally giving up on Fang. I wanted to tell him I was gay and tell him my feelings. Even though I knew he wouldn't feel the same way and it might ruin our friendship I wanted him to know. I mean the guy is my best friend he has a right to know. Plus he never really showed any signs of being a homophobe or anything.
Yeah I am definitely gonna tell him. But how? When? This was all much to complicated. I thought life was going to get easier after Itex fell! Think again Iggy. I let out a long sigh forgetting the thoughts. I played with the grass between my toes and spread my wings so they to could warm in the sun and be caressed by the soft grass. I really needed to stop thinking so much. At this rate I was gonna have wrinkles before I'm 30. Not that it really mattered anyway I wouldn't be able to see them.
"Hey Iggy," A soft voice said behind behind me.
"Hey Ella," I replied. I heard the grass crinkle where she sat down next to me and smiled in her general direction. Ella was the only one who knew of my sexual preferences and she was very supportive of it. Which I greatly appreciated. We had dated for a while when we first met and things were great between us. For awhile at least. We slowly began to grow apart and Ella found someone else. Eventually it all worked out because I told her I was gay. Ever since then we had become very close friends. It was nice to be able to talk about my feelings with someone. I wasn't very good at expressing my feelings or anything but with Ella I felt more comfortable doing so.
"Whats up?" She asked. I heard the curiosity in her voice and figured there was no use in lying to her about what I had been thinking about. Plus I needed a second opinion on my planned actions.
"Just thinking. I want to tell Fang I'm gay."
It took her a second to calculate my words and form a reply. "Are you going to tell him how you feel about him?"
"I don't know Ella. I want to even though I know he won't feel the same way. Part of me just thinks I'll feel better if I just tell him and get it off my chest. I mean he is my best friend I'm not used to hiding things from him," I said placing my face in my hands.
Ella scooted closer to me and placed her small hand on my shoulder. "I think he deserves to know you're gay but I'm not sure what to say about telling him you like him. I know you wouldn't want to ruin your friendship."
I lifted my face from my hands and nodded. Ella was right I couldn't go just blurting out hey Fang I'm gay and in love with you. Fang was in love with Max not me and that would never change. "You're right. But I still wanna tell him I'm gay I just don't know how to do it."
Ella sighed next to me and leaned her head on my shoulder. "Stop making things so complicated. Just tell him you need to talk to him. He is your best friend I'm sure he will understand." She told me chuckling.
I smirked at her reply. "Yeah lets just hope he doesn't develop a sudden hatred for gays as soon as I tell him."
"Don't be so negative! I'm sure things will be fine. He is gonna find out eventually it would be better if it was coming from you."
I nodded yet again. I was grateful to have Ella by my side but even her encouraging words didn't shake the nervousness furrowed in my gut. But it was unfair of me to expect her to fix my problems. "Yeah I think I'm gonna do it tonight."
She lifted my hand to her lips so I could feel her smile. "Good for you."
I let my hand drop from her face and we continued to chat about whatever came to mind until we just sat there in comfortable silence. Ella began to describe the clouds for me and I closed my eyes and began to imagine it was Fang.
I was chuckling at her description of a cloud shaped like bunny in a tuxedo when we were interrupted by Nudge. "Ella! Ethan is here,"She shouted from the porch. Ethan was Ella's boyfriend. He was a nice guy and Ella was absolutely crazy about him. It made me happy to know she was happy, I could practically feel the joy beaming off her at the mention of his name.
I quickly folded and concealed my wings against my back so Ethan wouldn't find out anything he didn't need to know. I heard Ethan's footsteps approach us and he grabbed Ella up in a hug. "Hey babe," He said happily to her before giving me a warm hello.
I returned the favor and continued to enjoy the sun. Ethan spoke about some arcade he wanted to take her to and she left me with a goodbye. I took in a deep breath and slowly let it escape my lips. I stood up and brushed the grass off my jeans before entering the house. I heard Nudge and Max chattering away on the couch and easily slipped by them and into the kitchen. I grabbed a coke out of the fridge and leaned myself against the counter and taking a big gulp. The burn of the fizz was somewhat comforting.
I heard near silent footsteps walk across the floor upstairs and file them selves down the steps into the kitchen. I bit back a smile and shooed away the butterflies that fluttered in my stomach when Fang entered the room. He breezed past me and rummaged in the cupboard for something. Now was my chance to get him to talk to me. It was a rare occasion you found Fang without Max as his shadow. Now here he was and I was about to blow my chance. No I wasn't!
"Hey Fang can I talk to you?" I asked trying to hide the tremble I knew was present in my voice.
"Uh sure," He mumbled still scrounging in the cupboard.
"In private," I said a bit more forcefully now so he could tell the seriousness of the situation.
I heard him back away from the cupboard and felt his stare. "Alright."
I led him upstairs into my room where I closed the door softly behind me. "Whats going on Ig?"
I took in a shaky breath. Wow here I was actually going to tell my best friend I was gay. I prayed nothing would happen between us after I told him. Sure I accepted that I would never have a romantic relationship with Fang but I couldn't lose his friendship. Second thoughts swirled before my eyes tempting me but I managed to shove them away. No I had brought Fang up here for a reason. My hands quivered at my sides and I parted my lips to speak. A bit of a croak escaped my lips before I was able to form the words I was looking for.
"Fang I'm...I'm... I'm gay."
Well there is chapter 1 for you. Wicked cliff hanger huh? XD Anyway review and tell me what you thought! How will Fang react to Iggy's confession? Will their friendship be able to carry on? Will Iggy end up telling Fang his feelings about him? Things to ponder xD Anyway this chapter seems kind of short to me but I figured it would be a much easier read if I got to the point a bit faster.