How To Write A Heist Notice 101

By
Kaitou KID
aka
The Magician Under the Moonlight
aka
The Gentleman Phantom Thief
aka
Me.

A short and concise instruction on the skill that eludes you. With examples.

This is a pamphlet for beginners and experienced jewel thieves alike, who want to learn the delicate art of writing a successful heist note. A heist is only as good as its execution, and the heist notice is an indispensable part of any heist. You don't have to be a genius (or the Kaitou KID) to write a good heist notice. However, most people are HOPELESS at composing a good notice. Fear not, lost souls, for KID-sama has a solution to your woes!

Just like a heist, the heist note also needs prior planning and effort. Otherwise, you'll end up with a sloppy, hastily penned notice that is a jumble of words and painfully transparent in meaning. The only better thing would have been to go and hand the police a copy of neatly printed information about the heist. For Kami's sake, leave something for the police department to do! The police should have to THINK to crack the notice, but it shouldn't be completely incomprehensible. It should be just cryptic enough for them to have to call in Tantei-kun on occasion. (Tee hee.)

Anyway, moving on. Given below are the basic steps to write a heist notice:

Step 1: Locate the gem.

Pick a gem to target, and also its location. This step is usually covered while planning the heist, so you can directly go to step three. However, I have mentioned it.

Step 2: Pick a date.

Choose the date and time of the heist. Again, this may be covered while planning the heist.

Step 3: Find out a lot of pointless, obscure trivia.

The most important step. Find material to link to the gem, the date/time of the heist, so that you can shroud all the information. Allusions, alternate meanings, legends, myths, synonyms, local names, natural phenomena- ANYTHING GOES. Use all your resources to come up with hints to the gem, the location, the time- everything.

Step 4: Weave magic with words.

The most difficult step. You have the information, you have the trivia. Now, combine everything to write a polite, but vague notice. Your language should be clear, concise and confident. Allude to everything without openly stating anything. Hide everything in plain sight. Baffle the readers. Write poetry if you want to! The end result should be mysterious, intriguing, challenging and beautiful. And of course, with a bit of flair. This is show business, people!

Step 5: A classy signature.

If you've gone to the trouble of planning a heist, atleast let everyone know that it was your work. A unique signature does the job. It also gets you your very own tag. And the police know who to curse.

That is it with the main steps of writing a heist notice. Like any other art, it requires practice. With a few tries, you should be able to grasp the basic concepts. After that, you can tweak things to give it your own touch. The next part of this pamphlet contains five examples, written using the above instructions.

Example 1: Bleeding Heart (Red Garnet)

Time: The day before Tanabata, 10 pm

"24 hours before the fireworks light up the pathway of the night sky, I would gaze upon the heart that bleeds for them, the lovers forever doomed to meet once a year.

[KID doodle] "

Example 2: Ocean's Tear (Aquamarine)

Time: Thursday, 9 pm

"O Norse god of lightning, when the clock chimes nine,

Rest assured, the tears of the sea will be mine.

[KID doodle]"

Example 3: Seer's Sister (Moonstone)

Time: Monday, midnight.

"The Seer has foretold that on the day to honour his chaste sister, a vision in white shall whisk her away when the clock strikes twelve. How could I refuse a prophecy by the Sun himself?

[KID doodle] "

Example 4: Eye of the Wyvern (Peridot)

Time: October 30, 10:30pm

"On the 295th day, I shall reclaim that which belonged to the Western cousins of the dragons. They long to see the timepieces reflect the calendars.

[KID doodle]"

Example 5: Setting Sun (Fire Opal)

Time: June 21, Summer Solstice, 11 pm

"Ladies and gentlemen! I bring to you a vanishing act with a ball of fire, which comes to rest after its journey on the longest day of the year. The audience is requested to be present by 11pm sharp.

Yours truly,

[KID doodle]"

I have outlined the essential steps to be undertaken to write a good heist note. For Kami's sake, follow them. Don't be an embarrassment to jewel thieves everywhere by writing a deplorable note. We have a reputation to uphold!

Happy Writing!

[KID doodle]

For further details, contact:

Kaitou KID-sama

2106-1412

thekaitoukid

Disclamer: I own nothing. Gosho Aoyama-sensei does.

A.N. Happy birthday Kuroba Kaito and Gosho Aoyama-sensei!

This is my first Detective Conan/Magic Kaito fanfic, and I really hope to be writing many more. I hope you like it, reviews are welcome. And PM me if you have any questions about the heist notices. I may have gotten a bit too obscure.

I'll be updating my other works too, and may be publishing a few new ones, if my schedule works out. Sorry for all the delay, I had exams.

OnyxKatana :)